Ok.

I fell off the face of the earth for a while. Good trip, actually. Some 
rather interesting things down there. On the way I shut down my archive and 
1/2-way redesigned my site while rampaging my way through another semester 
of art school.

Anyways! If anyone remembers this game or my fic feel free to read ^.^ C&C 
very much appreciated and desired.

Previous chapters can be found at:
http://www.fanfiction.net/read.php?storyid=321570

* Warning: Contains (( Spoilers, Naughty Language )) *





[ four ]

Squall stared at the Estharian emissary and, not for the first time in the 
past two days, wondered why he hadn't just solved everyone's problems and 
had Seifer shot for treason the minute he'd stepped across his Garden's 
threshold. He was fairly certain he'd have no shortage of volunteers.

Little more than a few hours after they'd ended the meeting Quistis had 
treated Fuujin and Raijin to a few chili dogs in the school's cafeteria 
(Raijin had four). Despite all efforts to keep a close eye on the duo, 
Quistis' rather persistent Trepies managed to distract her long enough for 
both of them to slip away. Fuujin had been found a short time later beside 
Seifer after what Dr. Kadowaki explained was a loud argument between her and 
Rinoa. The latter insisted that nothing had happened save a difference in 
opinions and didn't Fuujin talk loudly anyways? Really, he had nothing to 
worry about.

Raijin, however, had relocated several of his old buddies. They had then 
proceeded to throw a raucous welcoming party in the dorms, much to the 
chagrin of the instructors and their neighbours. Drinking on school grounds, 
disturbing the peace, and destruction of public property were among the 
offenses that were incurred. A week of latrine duty and multi-digit laps 
about the Garden perimeter followed, though the offenders claimed the return 
of their friend outweighed the punishment.

On top of it all, no one had found anything in either Trabadia's or Balamb's 
libraries that would amount to anything significant regarding either the 
Sorceress or her Knight. Most of what had been written in Garden research 
books had been done in the past year and primarily served to incite a 
negative response to what had happened. What wasn't lacking, however, were 
the hundreds of emails and letters that had flooded Squall's inbox demanding 
reparation for Seifer's actions during the Sorceress' War. Everything from 
"I'll never see my son / daughter / wife / husband / mother / father again 
because of what he did!" to "$3iF3r MuST Di3!!!!!!!!(l337)" Loathe as he was 
to let anyone intrude on his personal files, he ordered a Cadet to screen 
the incoming messages for him under the threat that if anything found its 
way out of his office the boy would find himself back scrubbing 
thrustavaevis scales in Fisherman's Horizon without any hope of reprieve.

This was looking promising as the proverbial last straw.

The Estharian emissary responded little to polite requests, harsh orders, or 
deadly threats. When the SeeDs guarding the rear entrance demanded his name, 
his business, and the required papers, he would not, or rather could not, 
answer. Even when he, the Commander, arrived to take charge of the 
situation, the emissary didn�t budge from his place at the end of his ship�s 
loading ramp. The man merely reached out one massive arm and handed over a 
letter bearing the official seal and signature of the Estharian Presidency.

Squall fumed. �What the hell is this?�

The giant stared back. His lips twitched slightly, curving upwards and then 
back down.

�Fine. Just� fine. Whatever.� The young man viciously tore open the letter, 
his mood not improving.


Commander Squall Leonhat,
Heading Balamb Garden,
Acknowledged Hero of the Second Sorceress War,

As you have no less already seen, I�ve send someone I think completely 
trustworthy to deliver the information. Ward has specific instructions to 
deliver the CDs to you and to insure that no one but your closest friends 
have access to the files - meaning that he has to present when you guys do 
your thing. Don�t worry, I don�t think he�ll cause you any problems. Should 
anything happen, Ward is instructed to do everything in his power to keep 
the information contained within those files a secret, and I do mean 
everything.

Secondly, there is one more piece of information that couldn�t possibly 
leave Estharian borders and I insist that you and yours come to see it 
before you proceed with any rulings on the Former Knight. If possible, bring 
yourself, someone else you trust, and Almasy. Do not, I repeat, /do not/ 
bring the Sorceress with you.

Ward is also instructed to make sure all of this happens. I�ll see you soon!

President Laguna Loire


Squall peered at Ward who remained, as usual, stolid in the face of what the 
gate guards recognized as an eminent explosion. Both of them edged quietly 
towards the door.

The quiet, obscenity-laddened tirade that Squall launched upon his father's 
messenger became a favourite tale among the Balamb SeeDs for months to come.




The information gleaned from Esthar's private files was carefully scanned by 
Selphie, Quistis, Rinoa, and a disgruntled Fuujin. Zell was assigned to help 
Raijin keep watch over Seifer and Squall dispatched Irvine from Galbadia to 
pick up Matron from her remote orphanage. Cid was happy to be left with the 
children that they'd gained since the end of the war ("Not a problem!" he'd 
told the rather reluctant Edea during the transmission) and urged Squall to 
come visit as soon as possible. The boy responded that he would whenever his 
duties allowed the free time which, as Edea wryly commented, would probably 
happen sometime in the next decade.

Ward kept silent watch with two Estharian guards and two high-level SeeDs at 
the doors before the third floor. Several laptops had been made available, 
though all the notes were being taken by hand; after the meeting it would 
all be burned. Research was done in a particularly uncomfortable silence 
with Fuujin casting rancourous look at Rinoa from across the room and 
Squall's unusually angry arguments with diplomats from other countries 
filtering in through the door to his private office.

"I don't care what you sort of priorities you /think/ you have on Almasy, 
President Kaplain, but he was a SeeD defector before he was a glorious 
Galbadian General."

"That is -- I mean -- You also have his two accomplices!" came the gravelly 
reply. The politician's tone was far less firm than the SeeD Commanders, 
unnerved as he was under the calm rage of a military-born man. "I demand we 
have at least second rights to put these three people on trial! Do you what 
sort of damage they did to our country? They - "

"Of course I know what damage they did." Squall's voice went colder than his 
unwilling listeners had thought possible. "I was there, or did you forget? 
Maybe you did, seeing as how Galbadia seems to want the rest of the world to 
do just that."

The role of Squall Leonhart and his heroic SeeD compatriots was legendary. 
The role of Galbadia and her leaders was just as profound, though nowhere 
near as flattering; the late, former President's decision to allow the 
Sorceress to control his country was notoriously known as the catalyst that 
had sparked the War. Members of their public relations committee were still 
working hard to try and make the denizens of other cities forgive and 
forget. Their once flourishing economy had been broken by the slim flow of 
trade since many outside merchants now found conducting business with them 
distasteful. President Kaplain's sputtering response confirmed the fact that 
the situation still hadn't gotten under control.

Selphie risked whispering to Quistis. "He's been, like, totally 
short-tempered the last couple of days."

The SeeD instructor nodded while scrolling down the current open file on her 
laptop. "It'll all be better once we sort all of this out."

"Well, I don't think it will be. It's like, what's gonna happen to them, you 
know? And like, now Rinoa has to start over with people here and stuff."

"You never know. Rinoa's stronger than you - " A loud thump interrupted the 
otherwise quiet room. " - Rinoa, where are you going?"

All eyes drifted to the young woman, her hands over her mouth and her face 
drained of colour, who had stood so suddenly her laptop had fallen from the 
table and landed onto the thick rug below. She looked about, a flush 
appearing on her cheeks. "Nowhere, nowhere. I think... I think I need a 
drink." The young Sorceress swiftly turned and ran out the door, startling 
the four guards (who were in the midst of an intense tournament of Triple 
Triad) and leaving even Ward staring after her in bafflement.

Fuujin stood from across the room and readjusted the fallen computer back 
onto the table. She would have been content to leave the silly, overreactive 
girl's research alone had she not glanced at content that lay on the 
shimmering screen.

"What is it?" piped Selphie, seeing Fuujin frozen mid-step. "What was she 
looking at?"

The roar of outrage that erupted from the former Discipline Committee member 
startled even Squall, whose conversation with the Galbadian President came 
to a sudden halt ("What, by Hyne, was that? Getting attacked again?"). A 
moment later the portable laptop was back on the floor after having become 
violently acquainted with the sole of Fuujin's boot. The shattered screen 
littered dozens of tiny shards into the carpet while its CD-ROM drive spit 
up Dr. Odine's precious research and sent it bouncing towards Ward. The 
offensive item would have met a similar fate had the giant not swiflty swept 
his hand down and retrieved it. As it was, Fuujin trod mercilessly on his 
foot and the Estharian Vice President let out a pain laddened grunt.

"Fuujin!" Quistis cried. The young woman turned to the SeeD Instructor, her 
remaining eye casting a glare rancorous enough to send a chill down the 
blonde woman's spine. The albino then turned on her heel and slammed open 
the door, forgoing the attempt at a polite exit. The guards outside the door 
were scattered once again, though they quelled the same remarks towards the 
interruption that Rinoa had entailed. A biting comment towards Squall's 
silence resumed the conversation in the Commander's inner office.

Ward stood, as Quistis sighed and Selphie gaped, to place the disc into the 
Instructor's hands. She removed the one she'd been perusing (a detailed 
description of nearly every Sorceress who'd held Esthar since the first 
Sorceress War) and replaced it.

"'The Sorcerer's Knight: Personal Duties and Related Topics'," read Selphie 
from the screen. The three of them peered over (Ward's face expressing 
silent curiousity) as Quistis browsed through file topics. She clicked on 
one that was, partially by virtue of Selphie's giggles towards its title, 
looked to be the most scandalous. The next few moments were spent engrossed 
in the reading of the most intimate duties of a Knight to his Sorceress.

"That's, like, totally disgusting!" Selphie finally proclaimed.

"Is it true?" asked Quistis, looking at the Estharian representative. The 
giant shrugged as a bell rang over the Garden-wide intercom.

"Instructor Trepe, SeeD Tilmitt to Flight Loading Dock One. Instructor 
Trepe, SeeD Tilmitt to Flight Loading Dock One."

>From inside the Commander's office Kaplain's shouts were suddenly cut short. 
The door opened to reveal Squall's typically emotionless face, his agitation 
revealed by the clench of his fists. "That would be Matron," he stated. He 
arced an eyebrow at Selphie's hasty salute and even hastier exit, and then 
shot up both when he spotted the bludgeoned remains of Rinoa's computer.

"I'll explain later," promised Quistis, "but if we don't go now, I think 
Selphie might forget she's in front of a dozen other SeeDs when Irvine steps 
off of the transport. She's been promising to strip him with her teeth."




She placed long, delicate fingers on the door. She closed her eyes and 
swallowed uncomfortably, fighting tears of sorrow.

Behind it lay her greatest failure as a mother.

A boy who'd come to her broken and alone, a mold that was hers alone to 
shape and display to the world. She'd decorated him with her discipline and 
her heart, smoothed away the cracks left by his dead parents with pride and 
honor, and then set him to firm in the SeeD academy build by her own hands.

And then in a moment of pity, a moment of understanding, she embraced the 
thing that she'd prepared her whole life to fight. She felt the Other taking 
over, slowly and surely, eating away her consciousness and infusing her with 
an unwanted power. Before she could lose herself entirely she scattered her 
children and placed them safely in the institutions she'd built herself to 
fight herself. Those that were most important to her she sent under the care 
of her husband, hoping that he would somehow protect them from her.

What a failure he was. But married couples are sometimes so alike.

"Edea?"

Over a year since she'd left him, broken and alone...

"Matron."

A hand that was rarely gentle, that bore its scars and callouses beneath the 
blackened, sewn skin of a slaughtered creature, placed itself softly upon 
her shoulder. She drew in a shuddering breath.

"Yes. All right. Open the door."




They encircled Seifer as much as possible, making allowances for the amount 
of space that was allocated for individual patients. Fuujin hadn't left his 
side, and a single fiery glance made Rinoa quiver deliciously. However the 
girl stubbornly tried to sit at Fuujin's left, squished out of the way when 
Raijin wedged his bulk in between the two. He rather unsubtley used himself 
to prevent his best friend from glaring at the young Sorceress. His attempts 
at striking up a conversation with either of them earned him a kick in the 
shins from the right and silence from the left. Squall stood on Seifer's 
opposite side, leaning against the window pane with his gunblade close at 
hand. Selphie stood on his right, Irvine next to her. The lovers passed 
discreet smiles at each other while looking considerably flushed. Quistis 
sat next to Edea, who wore a long, plain black dress that stood starkly 
against the glamourous image of her as Sorceress that the public feared and 
loathed, both of whom sat at the foot of the hospital bed. Zell sat on 
Edea's opposite side, one ankle crossed over the opposite knee, his chin in 
his palm. Looming over him was the Estharian Vice President, arms folded.

The man in question sat sullen and quiet, the tube down his throat removed 
but his restraints kept tight. A steady, careful regiment of healing drafts 
over the last few days had closed up the infected T-Rexaur slice but hadn't 
restored his pallor. His eyes were still dark and sunken, his skin pale. 
Someone had taken the care to wash him and tie his hair back, but its old, 
healthy shine was still gone. His eyes, a bright, unhealthy green, strayed 
from Edea to Rinoa, lingered, and then set forward in an annoyed sort of 
glare at what appeared to be Quistis' elbow.

Xu grilled several SeeD graduates prior to the meeting regarding their 
ability to keep silent and their neutrality towards the Knight and his 
associates, eliminated three and replaced them, then organized the lot down 
the corridor to the infirmiry. Many SeeDs had begun campaigns and committees 
against the trio and there were rumours of underground civilian groups that 
were preparing to protest in front of the Balamb Garden. The fear of 
disciplinary action or violent reprival had kept most of them at bay, but it 
was decided to be better safe than sorry. Xu set herself at the end of the 
corridor in the event that all else failed.

Once everything had been settled Squall began the meeting, his voice cold. 
"We are here to confirm the accuracy of all information taken from the 
Estharian files. According to notes all files were made in secrecy and 
nearly all the theories went without being tested. Once the meeting is ended 
Almasy, Instructor Trepe and I will leave with Vice President Zabac to 
return the discs and meet with President Loire."

"But --"

"There were specific instructions not to allow the Sorceress to go." 
Squall's voice warmed slightly. "I'm sorry."

They began confirming power levels and spellcasting abilities, running 
through everything from simply walking through walls to the fearsome ability 
to combine with a Guardian Force. Both Edea and Rinoa offered their 
information and speculation. Edea was hard put to remember it all, having 
been under the control of the Sorceress Ultimecia most of the time her power 
was awake, and Rinoa had yet to explore her full ability. What was made 
clear was that the well of power a Sorceress could draw on was virtually 
limitless. Both of them confirmed that it was the user's ability and desire 
that strengthened or weakened an individual. The degree of familiarity was 
marked by the writhing, twisting lines that appeared on a Sorceress' face. 
Edea still bore them faintly, Rinoa none at all.

The younger Sorceress admitted, in a voice barely heard, that she was 
frightened of the consequences.

They moved on to the abilities of a Knight, which Seifer grudgingly either 
confirmed or negated. Again it seemed the individual made the man, and 
though the Sorceress commanded his fealty she lent none of her power. His 
abilities were what attracted Ultimecia to him in the first place, and his 
unwavering loyalty ("Lapdog is more like it," Zell muttered) kept him in her 
favour even after he had failed. Using Squall as comparison they also 
speculated to the theories that all Knights were gunbladers, and all began 
their careers young regardless of the age of their Sorceress.

"But, ya know, what about Seifer acting like he did?" interrupted Raijin. 
"We've known him almost all our life, ya know. He never acted that way 
before, ya know, all fanatic and stuff."

"AFFIRMATIVE."

Quistis shook her head. "Our theory is that the previous events, including 
his recent failure at the SeeD testing, consequently weakened him to outside 
influences. The Sorceress had found the perfect warrior to take advantage 
of."

"I am here, you know," came Seifer's hoarse, indignified response.

"There are some rather personal duties that were written about the Knight 
that we would like some confirmation about," Quistis continued. She opened 
the manila folder on her lap. "Here, and here. It was well documented that 
the Knight rarely left the Sorceress' side, unless it was to command her 
armies."

"That is correct," came Edea's low-voiced reply.

"Including state events, walks in the park, even guarded her private 
chambers."

"Yes."

"We also discovered several theories of a more... intimate nature."

"Oh?"

Quistis cleared her throat. "In all aspects the Knight was undoubtedly her 
protector. Several Knights gave their lives to their Sorceress and had to be 
replaced. There are, however, speculations that the Knight was much more 
than just a protector. They say that he was her body servant, her confidant, 
and... her lover. In all aspects he was there to please and comfort her."

Edea went silent while Rinoa looked down at the hands folded in her lap. 
Squall's expression darkened considerably as Quistis coughed, unnecessarily 
shuffling and arranging the papers in her lap.

The tension was broken by Seifer's grating laugh. "So Squall," he said, 
tilting his head up and right to face him, "fucked her yet?"

"Whoa, whoa Squall!" cried Irvine as locked together the lunging SeeD 
Commander's upper arms. "No good hitting someone already down, my man."

Squall shrugged the cowboy off without breaking the murderous stare shared 
by his rival gunblader. If only they both faced each other on equal ground, 
gunblades in hand. Irvine was right - no honor, no delight in striking the 
man down while he lay sick in bed, wretched and weaponless. Then again, to 
eliminate him now was to solve their problems. No more dealing with 
government officials, no more of Rinoa's pitying expressions, and, 
particularly, no more dealing with how just the sight of him infuriated him 
and overthrew his natural inclinations of right and wrong. Nothing seemed to 
matter except how quickly he could shove his gunblade into Seifer's body and 
anyone in his way be damned.

Edea's soft, deep voice penetrated the sudden silence. "It's true."

Squall drew his gaze to his former Matron, seeing the faint lines on her 
face that were still left from her ascension to full power. She returned his 
look with a solemn, understanding expression that underscored his rage and 
left him feeling astonished and surprisingly hurt.

"It's true," she repeated. "Seifer and I shared my bed as often as I desired 
it."

The slender woman forestalled the sudden flurry of shocked questions and 
murmurs from all sides with a delicate, upraised hand. "I realize the 
implications. I was once like a mother to him. And though Ultimecia held my 
body and my power I was still me in many aspects. What happened then as I 
think of it now sickens me. However, it was not only Ultimecia who desired 
him, and that I cannot explain. I wanted him, I needed him, and there was no 
reasoning to it. It was the basest of desires. Even now I still feel the 
pull, though it is not nearly as strong as it had been."

Fuujin turned to her beloved companion. Women were no mystery to him. 
Seifer's good looks, fighting abilities, and unwavering confidence in 
himself seemed to attract bimbos like Rinoa to him one after the other. He'd 
never boasted, but when the girl passed him in the halls his lips would curl 
in what looked like a warm smirk and their eyes would meet in a promising 
manner. He fell in love every other month and it was rare to find a girl who 
could resist him. Rinoa had held him the longest, nearly a year, but like 
all the rest he supposedly lost interest and let her go. Afterwards, he 
never acknowledged them and they were content to leave him be. Those that 
clung found the single, furious eye of the Disiplinary Committee's female 
terror between them and their former man.

He'd never, not in all those years, looked uncomfortable about what had 
happened.

"Can we move on?" Seifer rasped.

"There's really nothing else," Quistis replied. "Squall mentioned that there 
was a final piece to the puzzle that was in Esthar and couldn't be removed."

The SeeD Commander effectively masked the sudden surge of confusingly 
miserable emotions with a cold expression. "Quistis will join me, Seifer, 
and the Vice-President. Zell, I'm putting you in charge of making sure each 
and every piece of paper written about these proceedings is burned. 
Afterwards, help Irvine watch over Fuujin and Raijin."

"NEGATIVE! ESTHAR, GOING. SEIFER, PROTECT!"

"We might need another hand," Quistis offered. "Seifer still can't walk."

"I'd be fine if you got me out of these goddamn restraints," muttered the 
former Knight.

"So you can get out and cause crap around the Garden?" Zell said, one fist 
punching forward to enunciate: "Get real!"

Squall, exasperated, leaned his head into his hand before regaining his 
composure. "Fuujin stays. Last thing I need is to have two out of the three 
people most wanted by the civilized world running around outside of this 
complex."

"Oh! Oh!" cried Selphie, her hand up as she danced from one boot to the 
other.

"Selphie I need you to help Xu deal with Galbadia and the other two Gardens. 
It's going to get worse before it gets better."

"Right-o!"

"Good. Quistis, Mr. Vice-President, we're leaving immediately. Ask Dr. 
Kadowaki to prepare a wheelchair for Almasy. Restrain him to it."

"Fuck," stated Seifer.

The SeeDs stood and saluted. Commander Leonhart saluted back. "Dismissed."

"Squall," Rinoa pleaded as the group began to file out of door. As he 
retrieved his gunblade from Selphie she placed her hand upon his arm. 
"Squall, we need to talk."

"I need you to watch Edea," he replied without looking at her. "When we get 
back we can take her home."

"Squall, don't put this off, please," she replied.

For a moment she saw it - a glimmer of uncertainty, pain, and heartbreak - 
before it retreated behind his neutral, distant mask. She wrapped her arms 
around him and placed her head upon his chest. "You know I love you."

His arms moved slightly, rising up to return the embrace. Then they 
stiffened and dropped. His body sagged. "Not now," Squall whispered.

"But --"

"I said not now," he snapped. "We'll talk when I get back."

The Commander moved away, swiftly exiting the infirmiry and leaving the 
young Sorceress alone with the prone Knight. "Don't leave," he whispered.

She gasped.

//No. Nononono...//

//I wanted him, I needed him, and there was no reasoning to it,// so Edea 
had said. Since the moment he'd fallen at her feet Rinoa had felt the same, 
strange longing, pulling at her heart. At peril of Fuujin's wrath she had 
come at his bedside, received bruises on his behalf. She yearned for him, 
though not nearly as she did for Squall. Still, the urge to run to his arms, 
offer him comfort and love, was nearly too much to bear.

Rinoa ran to the door, in her panic forgetting to press the button that 
would activate the opening. As it was, it didn't matter.

Seifer closed his eyes against a flash of previously untapped power as Rinoa 
ran through it.


comments: mamoru_kusanagi@hotmail.com
webpage: http://www.kuskus.org/
FFVIII and all belongs to Squaresoft.


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