Almost missed this since it originally didn't have anything in the subject
line:

Part Three: Scales of Mystery

For a while, I sought this through my oniisama...after

all, he is perfection in male form.  No one else has
ever come close to making me doubt that...or so I
believed for the longest time.

I lived in a dream world for most of my younger years,

Actually, it seems almost everyone at Ohtori did. :)

"But oniisama!" I protested.   "Ohtori has one of the
best university curriculums in the country!   You
can't be serious!"  I placed my hands on his chest, as
though that could stop him from leaving.  He simply
didn't know how much I needed him to stay.

Heh. Or didn't really care.

How much

my definition of myself depended on him.  He simply
didn't understand how much my very existence was
balanced upon his presence.

Akio: No, it depends on mine.

A shuddering sob wracked my body in response to his
gentle explanation, and then another.   I fell forward
into Touga's arms - the arms that had always been
there when I needed them; the arms that were soon to
be taken away - and cried until it felt like I had
shed all the tears I had to shed.  My fingers gripped
his pristine white uniform tightly, but there was
nothing I could do aside from mourn.   He held me
tightly as I cried; for some reason, that just made
things worse.

nice passage

I tried to delude myself, tried to deny the reality of
his leaving until the day of departure by telling
myself that he really wouldn't go, that he really
wouldn't set foot on the train to Tokyo; yet he did.
He waved to me once from his window, and then never
looked back.

Without Touga.Life without Touga.

It turned out to be pretty damn good. Keg parties all the time. No more
pussy bishonen men hanging around. If I had known it would be this good, I'd
have gotten rid of him years ago.

Touga was gone.

There were so many ways I could have put it, but it
all boiled down to the same thing: Touga was gone.
He had stepped beyond my reality.  Even when he came
home, I could only catch fleeting glimpses of him.

Just like the old parents, eh?

Still, I learned the hard way that life went on, no
matter how I may have detested that fact.

I went into my next class with my usual coterie

Ohhh, another word I have to look up. My vocabulary is expanding of late.

of

admirers.  No one was special to me, though.  Miki
might have been, but the year Juri left, he took a
pass as well, transferring into some college of a name

'of a name' sound awkward to me. 'with a name' or something else perhaps.

I can't remember.   He was doing something with
mathematics I couldn't even begin to understand, which
was a pity.   He had been such a wonderful musician -
I wondered why he didn't become an actual
professional.

Miki: Everyone knows professional piano players are pussies. I just played
it to pick up chicks.

I had known about her since we were very young - there
were few families as wealthy as ours, and fewer still
had children our age.   Still, we had never had much
to do with each other.   She had been wrapped up in
her brother, and I in mine.

Oh? Nanmai realized that? How? Kozue was very subtle about it and was with
other guys all the time.

=> every decision without thinking for themselves - their

mindless devotion was irritating.   I didn't trust
them as far as I could throw them.  As for the
greenhouse, well, it has always been a place that has
raised ambivalent feelings

Heh. I don't really picture ambivalent feelings being raised ever, to be
honest. They're just sort of there, being... ambivalent. :)

"Kozue..." I whispered, trying to find something to
say that wouldn't sound too idiotic.   I hate idiots,
especially when I'm one myself.

Which was most of the time. :)

"It is," she said.   "He's not mine anymore;

Heh. He really wasn't hers ever.

She sniffled slightly, and I petted her hair
reassuringly.   "Miki could have gone anywhere, done
anything - he was seriously considering Julliard,

the woman, not the university, but that's not important right now.

received something just as valuable.   She gave her
friendship to me, and it was a precious gift.  I had
someone to speak to freely, someone who understood how
I could love my brother almost to the point of
obsession.

Errr, almost? :)

someone who could care for me as an

individual, yet still understand the ties that bound
me so tightly Touga.

True, I can see that. They do have that much in common.

I would have done anything for her, and she for me.
She made me laugh at her wildness, and reminded me
that life was a game, one not to be taken too
seriously all the time.  We would do everything
together, and sometimes it seemed like she lived over
at my house - I didn't get too close to hers, though,
for I understood that it was still sacred.  Miki lived
there, sometimes, though I had never once run across
him.   Other times he would be away for days or even
weeks at a time, though Kozue would never tell me why.

Miki: I'm working on getting Juri to swing back. That takes time, you know.

So it wasn't a big surprise when Kozue called me over
to her house one night to

two

She bent down and slid something I hadn't noticed
before from under the couch.  It was a long, slender
box made of a deep brown wood, a wood that almost had
a tint of red to it.  Her hands trembled as she placed
it on the table between us.   "It doesn't look like a
bomb," I replied lightly, trying to soften the mood.

Of course it is a bomb, or sorts.

A sword, nestled in a pile of yellow roses.

Hmm. Odd that Kozue would receive it. The yellow roses seem to imply it
should be Nanami's.

"I'm so sorry.I shouldn't have." Kozue said.  "This is
my problem.  But when I saw it, I thought you might
know what to do - I can't drag Miki into this - he'd
never forgive me."

Nanami: Don't worry. I'll drag him in it for you.

So how to get Miki to talk to me?  He must have been
at least subconsciously - if not actively - avoiding
me ever since leaving.

Oh? I don't recall him ever seeking her out.

"So?" Juri demanded.   "You should have let it lie!
For all we know this is one of Akio's schemes."

It would be a surprise if it isn't.

"Happy?   How can you be happy not knowing who you
are?"

You are who you are no matter how much or how little you remember.

"We're going to talk to Touga," Juri said.   "And
you're coming with us."

"I-I." This hadn't been what I was expecting.

Oops.

Again, a sharp sting to my cheek, and I became aware
of my surroundings.  This time it had been Miki who
had slapped me back to myself.   I fleetingly wondered
if there was something about the Kaoru twins and
slapping me,

Well, it's not like everyone doesnt' want to do it. :)

I am coming for you, Tenjou Utena.  I need to know who
I was, so I can discover who I am.  And you are the
one who holds the key to that mystery.

Looking forward to the next part now that I've finally gotten to this one.
It'll be interesting to see what good ole Touga is up to.

D.B. Sommer

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