Payne, Kenneth wrote:
And one more, ends it all. Only for now, we hope. ^_^ Please, more^^
Right. Me too. I'll try. ^_^;;
They were also edible, if not very tasty. Shrugging, he plucked one, and
nibbled on it slowly, leaning back against his pack, and staring up at
the stars. "I could look for Akane," he mumbled quietly to himself.
"They say that they found her."
KP: It is going to be Ryoga/Akane! And no, I had no spoilers so far... of
course if I'm wrong, that's obvious.
Hehe....
It's not what you expect.
he needed more time to think about things. He was not truly ready to
grasp the things he had reached for.
KP: I might suggest 'things he had _once_ reached for'. No real
conviction, except it sounds a little more in line with the tone of the rest
of the piece so far.
Changed.
Mousse could only grin at Minako after hearing that.
KP: Now you've done it.... I'm jealous of Mousse... he's not good enough
form my Minako!
Uh-oh!
lord's business is his own, not theirs," Kiima counseled. "But we
would be fools to throw away the opportunities we are given today."
KP: I love the dialogue you've given Kiima.
Thank you. ^_^;;
"Damnation," he growled softly, a smile playing across his face as his
anger faded. "I propose a new treaty. The Musk nation is willing to
offer an ice cream sundae to renegotiate the terms of our alliance."
"Is that so?" she asked, arching one eyebrow and grinning impishly.
"Purely for political purposes, I assure you, my princess," Herb said,
chuckling quietly.
"Of course," Rei said, giggling along with Herb's laughter.
KP: I Iike the fact that you kept Herb's thinking of wooing Rei as
diplomacy.^^
Despite his quote about learning humility. ;)
"I was," Norris said frankly. "And I think I've got a lot of writing to
do before I'm ready to rejoin a service -- any service."
KP: I really liked Norris.
He's an odd sort, but of the important new characters (and there were
more of them then I ever thought there would be), I think he and Durant
were the best. But then, they're both based on actual people, so... ;)
The girl looked up from her electronic clipboard, and glanced where he
indicated. "I think so," she said slowly. "Why don't we go ask her who
she's looking for?"
KP: A cold chill just passed through my spine... the girl wouldn't happen
to be looking for Ranma? Would she?
Could be... could be....
left on a ship from Earth. I... I lose the papers that said which one,
KP: lose ---> lost A typo that I caught! Yeah!
Yep. It is indeed a typo.
"Yeah, okay, I can understand that," he said, nodding. "What's his name?
And your name, for that matter?"
"I... I'm Saotome Nodoka," she said, bowing politely.
Ignoring the sudden chill running down his spine, he returned the bow.
KP: Chill spine... Am I there, or here? Nice piece of literature, this.
Lucky coincidence, but I'm glad that part worked. ^_^v
The girl cradled in his arms sighed, shaking her head. "Ryu-chan, I don't
think that was the best way to handle that," she chastised. "Even...
even if...." She trailed off, sighing, and clutching her clipboard to
her chest.
KP: I think Ryu, handled it just right.
A lot of people commented on that....
"You... you can't stay inside forever, you know. I.... I don't know what
I would have done if Haruka had... had.... I have sympathy for you, but
you can't stay inside forever. Do you really think it would make him
happy to see you so sad?"
"No," she whispered again, eyes brimming with tears. "I know he wouldn't
be happy. He would want me to be happy. To go outside and enjoy what he
won for all of us... and whenever I go outside I'm reminded of him
again, and it hurts."
KP: -_-;;
[FORESHADOWING]
Yup. Not every story is over, yet. For most of the characters who's
stories aren't finished yet, I simply left them out; their stories will
be told in full. But for Hotaru... it felt like this one meloncholy tone
just needed to be in the epilogue. :/
Unable to resist smiling, Setsuna shook her head. "I never spent any time
with him like that," she asserted. "But... maybe now would be a good
time to start...."
KP: O_o... now that is a weird match-up.
Or psuedo-matchup.
KP: Very nice epilogue. If I would make two suggestions they would be to
add a reference to Washu and Tsunami... maybe Michiru suggests a visit or a
call for Hotaru. But more importantly, add a little bit more information
about Akane, Ukyou, and Shamps... I imagine that if they were on the new
planet, Mouse and or Ryoga would have checked up on them to see that they
were safe. And who is this 'they' that Ryoga said found her?
The epilogue is mostly for characters who have some form of closure,
which Washuu, Tsunami, and the Fiancees haven't, yet. But for the 'they'
in question, I can answer that... in book two. ;)
KP: and book two comes when?
KP: Does Tokimi make her next move in her struggle to subjugate Washu.
KP: What is Tokimi's ultimate goal.
KP: Am I spelling Tokimi correctly.
KP: Will the power of the author resurrect Ranma.
In no real order: Maybe, yes, yes, could be, yes, possibly, blue, someday.
KP: That and more might be answered when Brian writes more!
Now I go to forget everything until the next part comes out, because I can't
handle the not knowing!
Thanks again for the kind words, KP!