KASUMI: Well, I think Ranma is nice! And that New York accent of his is
cute too.

NABIKI: What New York accent?

KASUMI: Didn't you catch it? He referred to Genma Saotome as his
"fodder."

*ahem* Anyway. :)

Quick correction: The title should say Tendos' rather than Tendo's, as
there are more than one Tendo.

    Agreed.

    What absolutely amazes me, though, is that _no one_ seems to have caught
the glaring typographical error I noticed after sending the story.

    When Kasumi is saying that she thinks Ranma has a sense of humor, I
started to write "I'm certain he has a sense of humor", and changed it to "I
think he has a sense of humor"....  And it came out "I'm think he has a
sense of humor".

    It's been corrected already, but even you didn't mention it, and you
usually spot that sort of thing.  ^_^

Funny concept, though the timing seemed a bit off to me. It goes for
quite a while without any hint of Ranma's new, er, culinary preferences
(there is the "meat on the butcher's block" referemce, but that's easily
missed) and then it hits us with a lot of it all at once. You might work
on introducing the idea a little more gradually. Apart from this qualm,
I liked it, and I think the diary format worked well.

    Hmm.  Perhaps padding with a few more paragraphs?  I'll have to go back
and look at it again when a bit of time has passed.  That always gives me a
fresher perspective.

    Thanks for the commentary on my little story!  I was beginning to wonder
if anyone had noticed it....  ^_^;;;

   Ja mata,
   Larry F

   The Lost Library of Florestica:
   http://rakhal.com/florestica/

   La Biblioteca Perdida de Phantasia:
   http://phantasiaca.tripod.com



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