Wow!  You've got mail!  I was wondering if I would ever see this. :)

Genma hit the ground silently and stood motionless, listening for the
enemy.  There was nothing; no startled outcry, no enraged yelling, and
none of that deceptive bursting into tears nonsense.

He was free from his wife at last!

Heh. Cute little build up.

Hey, she's scary!  >_<

Deciding that he'd best hurry up and get as far away as he could, as
quickly as possible, he ran the short distance to the wall at the back
of his yard, then leapt over easily when he reached it.

That's awkward. Id' rephrase it in some way, though how is eluding me at

the

moment.

Yeah, I know.  I had a lot of trouble figuring out how to phrase it without
using words from surrounding paragraphs repeditidly(sp?).  Ending up
settling for that.  If you have any suggestions on how to change it, I'd be
happy to hear them. ^_^;

After a short, panicked run to another nearby fence, he escaped once
again.  He kept jumping from yard to yard until he was about a block
away from his own house, trying to slip over each one as quickly as
possible, hoping that Nodoka wouldn't be upstairs and look one

out one

Yup.

 of the

windows that faced in his direction.  He had no illusions of his ability
to resist her screams of anguish,

inability, I think you mean

No, ability is right, I believe.  If I wanted to use inability, I would have
to rephrase to say 'He had no doubts about his inability to...'.  Instead,
what he has is a lack of illusions about his capabilities.  He knows he is
NOT capable of resisting his wife's crocodile (although this would NEVER be
proven!) tears.

 should she let that horrible technique

loose, so the best method of prevention would be to make sure he was too
far away to hear them when she started.

I'd cut this into two. Probably at 'loose. The best

Agreed.

He was currently on their roof, listening to the sound of children
screaming.  How Soun was able to put up with that, he did not know.

Soun: Earplugs. The most sound investment a parent can make.

Yeah, but then the neighbors would call the cops or something.  Or worse
yet, he'd take it to the next level - why wear earplugs if you can simply
lock them in a soundproof room?  And why clean up their messes when you're
practically FORCING the kids to make them?  The obvious solution to that
problem is to simply stop feeding them!  ^_^;

Which is why Genma was here tonight.  He was going to escape his own
personal hell, and it'd hardly be the friendly thing to do to leave Soun
to his.  They would ditch their families and go on a training trip,
maybe try to find that old, perverted master he had heard about.  Surely
the a

drop 'the'

Yup.

guy that ancient wouldn't really be running around groping women,

and somebody knocking on death's door as he was would probably
appreciate having a couple of young students to teach his ultimate
techniques to before passing away, right?

Interesting idea. Never thought of them hooking up with Happi after they
were married. Always thought of them being with their master before and a
bit after the children were born.

Well, it'd be harder for them to get married if they met Happi beforehand,
since the little monster would be a huge hindrance in finding a girl who was
willing to be around them.  I can easily seeing the two of them meeting up
with Happousai while on the run from their wives and children, then, after a
short while of putting up with that, sealing him in the cave and going back
home quite happily.  Granted, it makes the whole bit about them learning
Anything Goes from him a bit problamatic as far as the time frame is
involved, but we never actually see any evidence that he taught them in the
first place anyway.  The only thing I can think of which could be pointed to
as something that Genma is able to do that he might have copied off of
Happousai was the whole aura expansion thing, when they got really big
before Genma passed out or whatever.  It's entirely possible that the Genma
and Soun are considered part of the Anything Goes school simply because
they're Happousai's groupies. :)

If not, him and

he (I think)

Yup, it's 'he'.

As soon as he saw that his throw was successful, Genma pulled his head
back up and out of sight, then listened again.  After a short scream
loud thumps were heard leading towards the kitchen, probably that sow
going to call an ambulance or nearby doctor.

Definitely a variation of 'Genma: Evil Incarnate' here. You could probably
pull this off with out the snide little remarks he's making in his mind.

Yeah, I wanted to show a different version of Soun's wife (who I was very
careful to not give a name to at any point, just to avoid the cliches) than
what is usual.  Having her be a heavy and probably ugly woman was just too
great a temptation to resist.  Besides which, it helps make it clear that
Genma does not like her at all, which doesn't really matter, to be true, but
adds to the impression that she would not hesitate to call Nodoka about
Genma being outside unescorted.  Such a thing would obviously not be
allowed!  ^_^;

ribs.

Some blood, dark-red, trickled out from one of Soun's nostrils, but he
made no movement.

This looks bad.

Heh.  :)

Pausing to see his friend's reaction, he looked at Soun, who still
hadn't said anything or had his eighth shot yet.  Actually, Genma had
been forced to drink the previous seven, as well.  "Are you gonna drink
that?" he asked, mostly as a formality.

If he's dead, i think even Genny would have picked up on this at some

point.

Well, by this point he's fairly drunk, and he's definitely demonstrated
pretty profound stupidity at various times.

about it?"

The little man laughed, seemingly embarrassed.  "Well," he said, "I've
got something that might do that for you.  Some magic mushrooms I found
a few days ago for changing people's ages."

Oh, this is evil.

I know.  Nobody uses the evil little miner!  What a cool guy!

Turning, he looked at the still-sleeping Tendou girl.  That mark on her
face was pretty ugly.  Reaching out, he smacked her lightly on the
cheek, and she woke up.  As soon as she did, she opened her mouth and
started to scream.

He shoved the mushroom as far into her mouth as it would go, and she
shut up.  As he did so, she got bigger, aging a certain amount
instantly, then as she grew and there was more room, he pushed it in
further, and she got bigger still.

Yep. Evil Genma all right. Pretty stupid too, on the side.

Heh.  This fits right in with the nekoken training.  It's actually a great
deal more intelligent than that, I think.

The priest nodded, then asked, "Are you sure you want those two married?
They'll probably have little retard kids."

"Of course!  The kid is the whole purpose behind this!"

Real evil and dumb.

Well, it saves on a really long time of raising a kid, just to wait for him
to grow up and have ANOTHER kid...

Actually, what I should have done was made her too old to bear children.
THAT would have been evil.  18 year old Ranma, 65 year old Akane... whose
wrinkled skin causes that big splotch to kind of hang loosely across her
face, or something... ^_^;

The end.

Notes:  Yes, this was strange.  It didn't turn out near as good as I

wanted

it to, but hopefully it's at least slightly funny.

Not really. Pretty unfunny, but it could be I just don't care for the
premise. Should have made it more of a spoof. Reads too serious as it is.
Sorry I can't say anything more helpful but that's my opinion

Heh.  Well, I thought it was pretty funny, and laughed a few times while
rereading it.  I do admit that I have an odd sense of humor, and I often
don't find a lot of comedy fics to be amusing because of it.  On the reverse
side of that, I find things that others don't think anything of to be
hilarious, so it's hard to say.  The humor I tend to like more isn't the
obvious slapstick kind, and what I wrote does fit to my tastes for the most
part.  I'm not denying that this makes me a bit strange (but in the best
possible way!).

Anyway, I didn't get much response for this at all, so I'm not sure whether
or not your reaction was the general one, or if the reaction I got from
other people was.  The general response (again, what of it there was, three
other messages from the ffml and a few people on delphi and irc) was that it
was sick and twisted, but still funny.  It wasn't as good as I had
originally hoped it would be, but I was still satisfied with it overall, so
I'm gonna go with THOSE people... ^_^;

Thanks for the comments!


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