I don't know much about the challenge... yet I liked the fic, though I sitll have a few suggestions concerning certain things. ^^;

The Tatewaki Tendou thing was mostly a brilliant thing... certainly a more 'filled-up' character (I wouldn't say 'fully-developed'... 'filled-up' is more apt. ^^) in terms of him easilly fitting in Soun's shoes... certainly the rambling he did and his addressing to his sweet departed one... very intereting. 

Mu tsu, on the other hand... ^^; 

He was the point, the pseudo-punchline of the fic, yet his appearance there relied more on his... well, appearance. ^^ Other than her being a cute bespectacled girl, Mousse doesn't seem to have all that many a quality to fill in the Ranma Saotome man shoes except for looking like a bespectacled kawaii-ko most of the time. Granted, though... it has potential...

Imagine Mousse, after losing his glasses, goes apologizing to the wooden post, or scolding the errant black-and-white mailbox for turning him into a girl... but this is merely a snippet... and this snippet's ending (the 'punch line) seems weak with the little 'Tatewaki Tendou' aptness from before.

Though, if it was continued, it could feature one nice aspect worth continuing as a series fic... Mousse's blind devotion to Akane. Anyways, that's my two cents.


Ja!
Abdiel  

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