Alone

By Finmagik

Dedicated to: O'Donogue, Thanks for all your help with
other fics and Heart's Desire. I know I could Improve
on this one, Right?

Warnings: Angst, Deathfic, Sap.

Rating:  R.

    It had been seven years. Since they were married.
Akane looked and the picture of Ranma and her. The
smiles on their faces. Finally, the game of 
pretending they didn't care, of being immature and
hurting each other was over for good. They could drop
the mask and be happy. Everyone was happy that year: 
Shortly after them. Akari and Ryoga had gotten
married. Followed by Mousse and Shampoo, Kuno and
Mariko, and Kasumi and Tofu. Even Gosunkugi had found
someone, there seemed to be enough happiness going
around that year. She sighed.

Everything had gone just wonderfully until she found
out she was with child. They didn't have enough money.

Ranma of course being resourceful as ever found out
about a Martial Arts competition in China, that had a
large cash prize. Winning would be easy for him,
anyone could see that. But no could have guessed, the
engine of the plane he traveled on would overheat and
the plane would explode. Scattering bits and pieces of
bodies all over the ocean. Even Ranma couldn't survive
that.

It had been months since she found out. Since the
funeral. She had already spent all those nights crying
over him, crying for herself, for her child who would
never have a father.

She had already spent days, angry cursing to god,
cursing about herself, cursing him for being so...
so... himself.

But yelling baka to the sky didn't make the pain go
away. It only made it worse.

Now it felt she had come out of the other end of a
tiring storm of emotion. She felt so hollow inside,
and out. It was early evening. She had to leave the
house, since his death she had moved back to the dojo
and she couldn't stand seeing the looks of sadness and
sympathy. She had to have an excuse to go out for a
walk.

"We need to get groceries." she announced.

"Akane, you really shouldn't-" Her father began,
looking up from his GO board.

"No, I'm going to fine, don't worry so much." She said
smiling weakly.

[In Your condition?] Genma held up his sign.

"I'm fine." Akane kept up her smiling.

"I could always go." Nodoka added.

"No, No Auntie Nodoka the fresh air will be good for
me." Akane said. Before she would have been sent into
a fit of temper over all their nagging concerns, but
she was just to drained emotionally to care.

Walking out on the familiar street, didn't help.
Everywhere, she could hear their whispers see their
stares. Everyone and their brother came up to her and
told her how sorry they were.

She wanted to talk to someone. But none of her friends
ever helped. They had their own lives, which were
going along happily and flawlessly. She just couldn't
stand being near them, it made her more acutely aware
of how alone she was. Everywhere there were signs of
Ranma, the fence he used to walk along, the vacant lot
he used fight in, the high school, everything reminded
her of him.

Almost everything. There was the Shinto shrine. She
had never been that religious, but it would be nice,
to go under the arch. To be alone.

She walked in. Then she heard a voice from behind her.
"Can I I h-h-help you Mrs. Saotome?"

She turned and saw him standing on the temple steps.

"Hikaru, Gosunkugi? Is that you?" She could hardly
believe her eyes. She remember this being a skinny
gawky
disheveled, boy. But standing there was man, a Tall,
somber, grave looking man, wearing the robes of a
priest. His hair was still uncombed mop, now he looked
more gaunt, more emaciated, and his eyes, those
haggard melancholy eyes of his still unnerved her.
"It's been so long, since I've talked to you, how is
your wife...ummmm what was her name?"

"Akiko." He said softly.

"Well how is I haven't seen her around lately."

"She's been ill Mrs. Saotome."  He said and looked
down at the ground and turned away. "I have things to
attend to if you'll excuse me."

Inside his house, Hikaru sighed. Saying Akiko was ill,
was vast understatement. But she had always been that
way. He thought back.

~~~~~~~~~~

It had been after the failed wedding of Akane and
Ranma. He had been going to class as usual, looking
down at his feet. He never saw her. Until- "ooof!"

"I-I- I'm sorry, I should have been watching were I
was going." He said.

"No, its my fault," He head her voice it was as soft
and high as a whisper. He looked up and saw a girl who
looked frailer then he did. She was as pale as the
moon, slender, slyph-like. Her hair was brown and
wispy coming out in strands from a pigtail, and her
eyes, a large, and gray. "Ummm could you help me get
my
glasses?"

"Oh--yeah sure." He searched around gathering up her
various objects. He something here, it wasn't obvious
but there was pull, she was haunting. He looked at the
book he help to pick up. The secrets of the tarot?
Egyptian book of the dead? And other such strange and
unusual fair, only he had been interested in before.

"I can't find--my--my..." She murmured.

"Your glasses?" He searched around and regretfully
handed them to her. When she saw him that was going to
be it... he thought, no chance of anything even
friendship.

She put on her glasses looked at him and smiled
warmly. "Thank you, your very kind."

"Y- you're welcome." He said smiling back.

"I should be getting back to class." She said and got
up.

Hikaru looked down, he saw an object by his feet, he
thought it could be hers. "Wait you forgot--your
inhaler."

She blushed. "Oh, that, thanks again. I should
introduce myself I'm Akiko Termai."

"H-Hi, I'm Hikaru Gosunkugi." He said.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The inhaler, that should have been clue. But he didn't
take note of it then. Akiko, haunted him. Everyday she
had to take a drugstore worth of pills, to keep her
from falling apart. She could hardly eat a thing
without a risk of breaking out in hives and going to
the emergency room. She was  his glass angel, so
beautiful but so fragile.

Marriage, it was a dream to perfect for them. They
would settle down two quiet people living quiet happy
lives raising a family.

No. They had tried, But only gaining miscarriage after
miscarriage. They should have known her little body
couldn't handle it. And the last pregnancy the one
they had been determined to carry to term. The last
straw. It had been born four months premature. He
could see the vision of the tiny baby hooked up to
tubes and machines, straining to stay alive with all
its might. It was boy. It had lived three days.

That was the end, the doctor had told them that Akiko
couldn't go through with another pregnancy, that her
condition was deteriorating rapidly. And being as she
was, he was hardly surprised when they discovered the
cancer.

He was in the hospital how did he get there?    Now he
stared at her laying in the hospital bed. Her eyelids
closed softly, the tubes that came from her nose. And
the hospital gown that made the pathetically thin body
look even worse. She had gone into a coma after the
last operation, it was all the machines that really
kept her alive.

He had long gone through emotional hell. Watching her
struggle to hold on. And he knew now, she was gone,
this was just her shell. Now even that had given up.

 He walked out of the room. He felt nothing. She was
long dead in his mind. There had only been two women
he had ever loved. The first was Akane Tendo who had
been so strong, so loud, so bursting with health
beauty and energy. The other, his Akiko slender, pale,
with a soft-spoken voice like a child's, so frail. She
haunted him.

Akane was always active. Akiko was bookish, shy, and
constantly bed-ridden.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Akane had just had a check up. The doctor had said the
child was growing well. Which was good news. But she
was dreading its birth. She felt like, Ranma had taken
all the love she had to give and sucked it up taken it
away. She was so alone now. She felt so alone. Then
suddenly: "Ooof!"

She looked up, she had bumped into someone. "Oh,
Hikaru, what are you doing here."

"My wife has been in coma for the last few months. She
past on last night." He said.

"Oh god I'm so sorry." Akane said.

"No, its okay she's not in pain anymore." He said.

He couldn't look at her. Akane Tendo now Akane
Saotome. She was still as beautiful as he had
remembered her,
maybe more so now that she had grown up. She was heavy
with child as well, but what she had been through she
didn't deserve to hear more bad news.

Akane looked at him. He had such a profound sadness.
But she knew, as she had always known he was good
person,  He was a kind person and she knew that,
despite the foolish things he had done. He had found
some happiness and now it was gone and he was alone,
as alone she was. She wouldn't let that happen to him.
She didn't want to alone any longer, and she didn't
want him to be alone anymore.

"Hikaru wait," She called, as he walked off. He turned
around. "Would like to join me on a walk?"

"Yes." He said.

So they walked, the day was ending and the sky was
flushed red, turning to a deep purple. They walked in
silence, side by side. For a long time. For a moment
it was like Akiko was still alive and he forgot. He
slipped his hand into hers.  He remembered and froze.
He was about to apologise. When Akane turned and she
smiled at him She squeezed his hand. He smiled.

Two lost souls hedging back the loneliness in their
hearts.

~Fin/Owari~

[Note: The Name Akiko means Light or Iris but
interestingly enough Hikaru also means Light.]
 
 
[So that's it... I hope you like this old fic I
reposted from Ff.net, I'll never be as good as
anyone.. I guess I should find a hole and crawl into
it. Whyd the hell didn't anyone comments on Darkness
part three??!]

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