be." She gained a thoughtful gleam in her eye. "Yes, in hindsight,

Shampoo

has been going about winning Airen's heart all wrong. Hmm." She released
Ranma and wandered off, a calculated look on her features.

Unless the look was calculated, as in, she made herself look a certain way,
then it should be 'a calculating look on her features.'

about being "Perfectly rational" as she headed towards school.

Ranma smiled from his position on the ground. "At least someone is

acting

normal around here."

Right after he finished speaking Akari's Giant Sumo Pig burst through the
nearby wall and ran down the street in obvious panic as P-chan followed in
hot pursuit, little porquine pelvic thrusts jerking his body closer and
closer to his prey.  Ranma shuddered and closed his eyes just before P-chan
caught up, but didn't plug his ears in time to mask the sudden squeals of
pain and ecstasy.

(bah!  forgot the pig's name... for some reason I always think Katsuhino,
but I'm pretty sure that's wrong... ;)

With his eyes closed and ears covered, Ranma jumped up and ran in what he
could only hope was the opposite direction.  A minute or two later he ran
into something and was knocked back, landing on his ass.  He opened his eyes
and looked up cautiously to see his father, in panda form, gazing down upon
him with a strange smirk.  <Hello, boy.>

When he saw that one of his father's pandafied hands held a couple of small
pills he scrambled to his feet and ran back towards the dojo, screaming all
the way and ignoring the signs his father frantically waved about as he
followed.

Arriving at the Tendous' he slipped into the kitchen, thinking that maybe a
nice bit of food would settle him down.  What he saw, however, made him want
to puke up the remains of his breakfast.  Kasumi stood at the counter with a
carving knife, her father's corpse stretched out before her, and blood
splattered across her clothes and the walls.  A huge chunk of Soun's flesh
was missing, and as he watched, Kasumi sliced off a large piece of meat,
shoving it into her mouth greedily, her teeth and chin stained red with
blood.

He backed out of the kitchen slowly, silently, praying that Kasumi wouldn't
notice him or hear his movement.  Just before he lost sight of her, Kasumi
turned towards him and smiled, bits of flesh visible through her slightly
parted lips.

"Oh, hello, Ranma.  Are you hungry?  Lunch is ready!"

His stomach heaving, he stumbled back towards the living room, bent over and
trying not to blow chunks of food all over the nice, clean floor.  When he
finally regained control of himself he wiped a bit of spittle from the
corner of his mouth, glad that nothing else had escaped.  Straightening, he
looked about, and froze.

Cats.  Cats everywhere.  The doorways were all blocked by every color and
type of cat he'd ever heard of or seen.  Black cats, orange cats, white
cats, big cats, little cats, kittens, a panther with green/gold eyes staring
at him and licking its lips hungrily, a lion yawning with its huge and
powerful jaws opening up wide enough to swallow his head in a single bite,
some kind of spotted cat curled around his feet with its tongue snaking out
to lick at his ankles.

He turned, looking for somewhere to run, but there wasn't anywhere.  They
were all looking at him now, moving forward, getting closer, closer.  A
slight wetness in his pants made him look down, they were soiled, but not
only in the crotch.  Blood splattered across his slippers and bits of bone
lie about as the cat at his feet chewed, chewed at his ankles.

The last thing he saw as he whipped his head about, searching for freedom,
was a tail, attached to him, his hands changing shape, his arms becoming
furry, he could see his nose elongate and develop a black tip.  He was a
cat.

He screamed, and screamed, and screamed, and the cats moved in.

Everything was dark, and then something hurt.  His head.  Why could he feel
his head?  Again, a slapping sensation.

He opened his eyes to see his father in panda form.  He looked around to see
his various fiancees and rivals all looking at him with concern.

<Stupid boy!> said his father's sign.  <You forgot to take your medicine
this morning!>


My own little contribution... ;)

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