Hi all. Technically this is based on what I thought the movie AI was about  when I first saw the really early advertisements and posters. It turned out I was completly wrong but I figured since Speilberg and Kubrick wern't using my idea . . . . . Anyway as always Ranma and company are the property of Rumiko Takahashi. I would also like to thank my prereader Christophor Gwyn who also helps me with my technobabble. So without further ado, Montanto Productions proudly presents.

                                                                   Typical Day Scenario 34

                                                                          A Ranma Fanfic

                                                                                By

                                                                           Bill Morse

�Ahhh!!!  Stop following me, Shampoo!!� Ranma shouted, running as fast as her legs could carry her.  Not that it did her any good.  In her cat form Shampoo was far too fast.

So far it had been a typical day in Nerima.  He had been woken up far too early when his father had thrown him into the Koi pond, which had led to an hour long sparring session.  Breakfast had been uneventful.  That is until Akane had asked Kasumi if she could cook dinner later that week.  She wanted Kasumi to be able to relax on her birthday.  At the time it had struck Ranma as strange.  Not that Akane wanted to cook, but hadn't it been Kasumi's birthday two weeks ago?  He brushed the thought away in a second unable to resist cracking wise about Akane's cooking.

The argument had culminated with Akane hitting him over the head with the dining room table.  They were both pretty quiet walking to school.  That is until it had rained and they had gotten into a fight concerning Ranma being too stupid to remember his own umbrella.  They had had to stop at Dr. Tofu's to change Ranma back.

They got to school with minutes to spare.  Unfortunately, Kuno was waiting for Ranma - wooden sword in hand - demanding that Ranma free both Akane and the pig tailed girl.  Ranma wasted a whole minute getting around Kuno.  It may have gone longer had Ms. Hinako not shown up and broke up the fight in her own unique way.

Class had been boring.  What little of the English class Ms. Hinako finished sounded suspiciously like VCR instructions.  He wondered what the test would be like, explaining how to set the clock?  It was only a matter of time before order in class fell apart as some one who had smuggled in candy distracted Ms. Hinako.  Things went down hill from there.

Lunch was pretty uneventful.  Both Ukyo and Shampoo had shown up with lunch and fought to feed him.  It was a choice between pork cutlet okonomiyaki or shrimp ramen being shoved down his mouth.  The same recipes they had brought with them two weeks ago.  He barely paid any attention to the afternoon classes.

After school Shampoo was waiting outside of school grounds to pounce on him yet again.  He could see Akane gritting her teeth as she walked towards him with her hands clenched into fists.  Things got a little vague after it started raining.

Ranma stopped, gasping for breath.  She had managed to lose Shampoo by cutting through a scrapyard she knew had an especially ferocious guard dog.  It would probably be some time before Shampoo would be able to get down out of the tree.  Another advantage of Ranma's strategy was that the scrapyard was merely a block away from the public bath.

�Yo, Ranma,� Hiroshi waved as Ranma walked out of the bathhouse refreshed.  He and Daisuke had switched to street clothes.  �Me and Daisuke are heading over to Ukyou's for a snack, want to come?�

Out of the frying pan and into the fire.  Ranma shrugged.

Fortunately the after school crowd was too much for Ukyo to handle at the same time as flirting with Ranma.  She smiled as the three entered and continued to serve her customers.  Ranma and friends were able to find a find a seat in the corner of the restaurant's counter.

�So how'd it go with Shampoo, Ranma?� Daisuke asked.

�How the heck should I know?� Ranma muttered, wondering if the dog had given up on her yet.

�It's no fair, Ranma how come you get all the girls - and you blow the whole thing off as if it was nothing?� Hiroshi demanded.

�Yeah, Ranma if your not going to share the wealth at least tell us about your exploits,� Daisuke added.

�What did you say?� Ranma choked on his okonomiyaki

�Ah.  .  .  .I said at least tell us about your exploits,� Daisuke repeated.

�That's what I thought.  I could have sworn I heard you say that before.  In fact you were wearing that shirt when you did.�

�Ah that�s one heck of a coincidence, Ranma.�

�Yeah, it is, isn't it?� Ranma scratched his head and looked around the room.  �Hey Uchan?�

�Yes Ranchan?� Ukyo asked turning from her customers.

�Didn�t you get rid of that poster?� Ranma pointed at the far wall.

�Oh for a while, but I changed my mind.  I put it back up.�

�I saw you throw it away when Tsubasa tore it up by accident.  �

�I bought a new one, Ranchan.� Ukyou replied immediately.  �Hello, Akane-chan.�

�What?  I don�t see Akane any.�  Akane burst into the restaurant carrying two umbrellas before Ranma had a chance to finish his sentence.

�There you are Ranma.  I was looking all over you.  Kasumi was worried you'd get caught in the rain again so she sent me to get you.  Here.� she handed him one of the umbrellas.

�What the heck are you talking about? The sky cleared up after that morning shower.� Ranma was interrupted again this time by thunder.  The rain started coming down in buckets.

�You better go with her, Ranchan.  I'll see you tomorrow,� Ukyou patted him on the arm and winked.

�Yeah I guess I better,� Ranma took the umbrella and got up to follow Akane. �See you later guys.�

Ranma and Akane ran back to the Tendo Dojo making it only a few minutes.  Dinner was a quiet affair.  Ranma couldn�t help thinking about the incident in the restaurant and about the other events of the day that had been less blatant but when taken in context with everything else felt very strange.  He was still thinking about it when he fell asleep later that night.

# # # # # # # #  # #

�Good Night, Ranma,� Nodoka Saotome smiled, pressing a button.  She leaned back watching the system shut down breathing a sigh of relief as the monitors in the room blacked out.  The words, �Ranma is sleeping� scrolled across the screens.  �That was close,� she said out loud, �good work, Akane.�

Akane Saotome, the lead programmer in charge of virtual reality simulations, blushed as she looked up from her monitor and removed her headset.  �Thanks, mother, it's amazing how well you can think on your feet in crisis situations, of course that improv class in college helped.�

�Well it worked very well, I'm sure Mr. Tendo will give you a commendation for this.  In the mean time I want you to start working a way to explain away the discrepancies while keeping him occupied.  I'd start with a REM period.  Start work on one of those family comedy scenarios you�re so good at.  I'll reschedule the next crisis event.�

�I've got some notes I'm working on already, Mother,� Akane smiled.

�Good.  Kasumi?  I'm going to need a complete transcript of today's session. You and I are going to have to go over the whole thing I'm afraid.  Ukyo? I want you to do a complete diagnostic on the system.  It's probably nothing but I don�t want to leave anything uncovered.�

# # # # # # # #  # #

The boardroom was full when Nodoka arrived.  Her primary staff with the Ranma project was waiting for her.  Kasumi Godai had a PHD in psychiatry and was one of the primary designers of Ranma's neural network.  Ukyo Moriboshi was the lead engineer on the hardware end, and of course Akane.

Soun Tendo, the CEO of Tendo Industries, was there with his personal assistant, Nabiki Takayama

�I'm sorry to keep you all waiting,� Nodoka apologized as she entered, her arm full with files.  �After going over the transcripts and the last months records I found out what caused the problem.  I'm afraid it was my fault entirely.  This was the second time we ran Typical Day Scenario 34 this month.  Despite all of the random incident generators in the scenario it was too soon.  Ranma recognized some of the dialogue in a conversation.  Fortunately he wrote the worst of it off as d�j� vu.�

�Oh, Mom, I'm sorry.  If I had been there I would have.  .  � Akane exclaimed

�Don�t be silly, Akane it was your day off, I got sloppy and I take full responsibility for my actions.  Kasumi and I discussed this before the meeting and I think we were lucky and able to avoid any possible trauma.  Were there any hardware problems, Ukyo?�

Ukyo glanced down at her notes �Nothing noticeable, Mrs. Saotome.  There was no visible damage.  Personally I'd look at this as a good sign.  Ranchan's progress is remarkable.  He might just go lucid almost a year before the schedule predicted - this is fantastic!�

�I somehow doubt that,� Nabiki grumbled.  �If it wakes up before we're ready, who knows what will happen?  We might have to scrap the whole project or at least wipe his memory banks and start from scratch.�

�Ranchan is not an it,� Ukyo growled.

�Oh right, how silly of me to forget.  Ranma is either male or female depending on what the plot dictates.  I wonder what would really happen if you splashed Ranma with cold water?�

�Well to start with I'd beat you senseless if you even think of putting the tiniest drop of water on a single circuit one of his mother boards.�

�Ukyo, calm down.  Nabiki, Ranma is boy.  He is 180 cm tall and weighs 92 kilos.  He has black hair that he wears in a pigtail.  He likes martial arts and eats like the horse he was named after.� Akane found herself just as mad at Nabiki as Ukyo was.

�Yeah, all 300 terabytes of him.�

�Ladies, please, this is getting us nowhere,� Nodoka broke in before the argument got any worse.

�Sorry Mrs. Saotome.  �But could you tell us why we included the gender switch in the programming anyway?� Nabiki asked.

�We wanted Ranma to be ready for any situation and we did not want him to be limited by one mindset.  Well, to be honest I read it in a comic book,� Nodoka smiled.

�Why wouldn�t we be able to simply delete the entire session and start from the day before?� Soun asked.

�Well, Mr. Tendo, in any other system that would indeed solve our problem.  However Ranma is designed to learn as any normal adolescent male would.  That means that as he experiences new things they are filed away into several of over a thousand different processors.  To pick out all of the information he gathered in just one day would cost us almost a month of down time.  In earlier stages of the project we would make duplicates of Ranma's memory every day so we could simply reinstall the software if anything like this went wrong.  But as his system evolved this became increasingly impractical,� Kasumi explained.

�I see,� Soun stroked his mustache in contemplation.  �So is everything ready to start him up again tomorrow?�

�I think we have all of the bugs worked out as long as the REM and Family Comedy Scenario worked out.� Kasumi looked at Akane questioningly.

�I was a little rushed on this - so there are a few recurring elements which, by our current criteria, could be problems - but I think this one will keep him active enough that he won't have time to think about it,� Akane apologized.

�Well, I suppose it will have to do.  What do you have for us?� Nodoka asked

�I thought we could go with a variation of one the fianc�e scenarios.  In this one Genma lost a card game about twenty years ago, during the days he trained under Happosai, and agrees to give away his oldest daughter to pay back the debt.  Considering the circumstances Ranma, or in this case Ranko, will have to do.  It should keep him occupied for a week at least.  I was thinking of having some big duel for him to participate in, in order to get out of it all.  How does martial arts origami sound?�

�I don�t know, Akane.  We've put Ranma through some weird stuff in the past but .  .  .  .  .Martial Arts Origami?  That's silly.� Ukyo shook her head in amused.

�It is my first draft,� Akane explained.

�Well I think that settles everything for today, � Nodoka smiled.  �We all have work to do before we start him up again.  Akane, could I have a word with you?�

�Of course, Mother.� Akane waited for the others walk out of the boardroom.

�You really hate him, don�t you?� Nodoka asked.

�I'm sorry, Mother?�

�This is the fifth scenario you've had him do something so incompetent it boarders on evil.  We agreed that you could use Genma to provide conflict and comic relief for many of the more standard scenarios but the way you�ve been writing him recently, does your father really deserve this kind of treatment?�

�Yes, Mother, I think he does.  The way he left you left us, high and dry....�

�I remember.  I was there.  You exaggerated the whole affair brilliantly in crisis #345� Nodoka said dryly.

�I don�t know why you never filed for divorce.  You could have sued him for all he was worth!�

�I have my reasons, Akane.�

�It's such a waste, Mother.  The way Mr. Tendo looks at you, you two would be perfect together.�

�That's enough, Akane.  Just ease up on him.  We use real people in the simulations so that Ranma can recognize familiar faces when he finally goes lucid.  Creating situations where Ranma might be openly hostile to a real person does the project no good at all, do I make myself clear?�

�Yes, Mother.�

# # # # # # # # # # # # #

�Yo, Akane, wait up,� Akane turned to see Ukyo running up the sidewalk.  She stopped to wait for her.  Catching up Ukyo stopped to rummage through her jacket pockets.  Taking out her cigarettes she lit one and took a long drag. �Ah, that hit the spot.  Look's like Saotome-san had you burning the candle on both ends too I see.�

�Heh, she turned down the first two drafts for the next scenario.  She said I wasn�t finessing it enough.  Anything too over the top and Ranma's suspicions, if there are any suspicions, will continue.�

�Better you then me, � Ukyo laughed, �and here I was beginning to worry nepotism was an issue.�

�Oh, forget you, how did it go on your end?�

Ukyo blew a long stream of smoke.  �Oh, we went over everything twice just to be on the safe side.  You know the drill.  I used it as a good excuse to add a few of those installations we talked about."

�Really? That's terrific.  But I've been the office for the last forty hours and I've had all I can stand regarding the project to last me the rest of the day, and I'm starving.  How does the Nekohaten sound to you?"

�Whatever, it's your turn to pay after all.�

�It is not.  I paid for lunch just yesterday.�

�That was for coffee it doesn�t count.�

�Sigh, alright, alright, it's my turn lets go.�

# # # # # # # # # # # # #

�Ah! Ladies, welcome,� Kho Lun, the owner of the Nekohaten, grinned as the two woman entered.  �I was beginning to think you two were starving to death.  Or worse eating in that rat hole your company calls a cafeteria.�

�Ah, you really thought you could keep us away,� Ukyo grinned.

�You can't blame an old woman for worrying.  Your usual table is ready.  Shan Pu will be with you in a minute.� Kho Lun said.

Kho Lun's granddaughter Shan Pu was there in a minute with their menus, �Akane-Sempai, Ukyou-Sempai.  I haven�t seen you since spring break how are you?�

�Hard at it, Shampoo, Mom's been working us hard.  How are you doing?�

�Oh just great, I passed my entrance exams!  I'm going to Tokyo University!� The eighteen year old grinned broadly.

�That's fantastic, Shampoo, I'm so happy for you,� Ukyou smiled.

�Thank you Ukyou-sempai.  Akane-sempai? Has your mother mentioned anything more about that summer internship?� Shampoo asked turning to Akane.

�You'd have to ask her the next time she comes in here, Shampoo.  But I think the chances are pretty good.

�Thank you, Sempai.� Shampoo's smile grew even wider.

�I wonder if your mom's concerned enough about this Scenario 34 business to keep Ranchan off line long enough for us to have a decent weekend,� Ukyo said after Shampoo had left with their orders.

�Why, you want to spend more time with Ryouga?� Akane grinned conspiratorially.

�Ryouga? Oh please, don�t get me started on that jerk.�

�Really?  I always thought you two were perfect together,� Akane made a mental note to edit some of her plot notes later.

�Oh he's nice enough but you wouldn�t believe how traditional he is.  One night in the sack and he's working out the prenup.  He doesn�t want someone to love him, he wants a housekeeper.�  Ukyo took a long drag on her cigarette.  �I mean really, Akane, can you picture me cooking, even for a minute?� She pointed at herself laughing.

Akane stifled a giggle.

�Why do I get the feeling I should start looking at your code?� Ukyo asked as she watched her best friend burst into hysterics.

�Oh Nothing, nothing at all,� Akane giggled.

�Please forgive me if I don�t believe you,� Ukyo growled.  �Considering I'm looking at the woman who wrote her mother as an honor bound ditz willing to force her only son into seppuku if he didn�t match her expectations I expect anything.  Now spill it, what did you do to me?�

�I made you one of the fianc�s,� Akane said breathlessly.

�You did what?�

�Oh, don�t worry I made you the sane fianc�, the one who was his childhood friend who he always goes to whenever he needs some one to talk to.�

�What can I say?  There's not a male AI alive that can resist a pretty girl with a soldering iron.� Ukyo laughed.  �So how much damage do you think this glich will do?� she asked.

�You'd really have to ask Kasumi about that one.  I think the worst thing that could happen is he goes lucid sooner then our schedule allows.  This could be catastrophic.  After all if he were to wake up today he would think the real world was a spoof on every bad martial arts flick Hong Kong ever produced.�

�I always wondered why we took that route.�

�It was Mom's idea.  It's essentially used to prepare him for any scenario no matter how silly.  We're also pumping in a lot of data subliminally.  He's learning a lot more then he realizes.  Anyway, once the first stage is completed things will be getting a little more normal.�

�First stage?�

�Oh yeah we've been working up towards a grand finale for some time.�

�Really?  Yuka mentioned something about that, but she wouldn�t give any details.�

�Well for the past month we've been concluding a lot of the plot holes.  We�re finishing off with Nodoka, that is the virtual Nodoka, finding out about Ranma.  She makes Ranma and Genma move back to her house, but they're back at the Tendos in no time because the fianc�s destroy it.�

�Fianc�s huh?  Wait a minute, you didn�t make me the gymnast did you?�

�No, anyway this leads us into the final story.  Ranma and company return to the Jusenkyo valley due to some sort of crisis involving the Jusenkyo Guide. In the mean time Akane, the virtual Akane, is kidnapped.  In a spectacular climax Ranma rescues her, destroying the Jusenkyo valley in the process.  When they return to Tokyo they are shanghaied into a wedding by all three parents.  It will be a complete disaster, but Ranma and Akane have grown closer together.  End of story.�

�Bravo, I'm more impressed then usual.�

�Well, Mr. Tendo didn�t hire me for my fantastic looks you know.  Anyway, with Stage 1 complete we start easing him away from the fantasy world that we developed him in.  The purpose of Stage 2 is to let him mature with VR Akane's guidance, which finally takes us to Stage 3, where he awakes into the real world.�

�Is the virtual reality version of you the key then?�

�Partially.  Almost all of the characters are based on staff members in the company to help his transition when he finally wakes up.  However in the case of Akane we have a little more added.  As you know we have two expert systems controlling her reactions and response.  In her own way she's almost as sophisticated as Ranma.�

�I've noticed she gets most of the screen time.�

�Yeah, I put a lot of work into her, sort of going with what I was like at that age, and threw in every bit of insecurity I remember.  Including making her a lousy cook, a tomboy - good at sports, but not as good as Ranma.  She should count her blessings though I didn�t give her braces.  But listen to us.  We're talking shop even during our time off.�

�Yeah, go figure,� Ukyo laughed lighting another cigarette.

�My bad, but while we're on the subject...I was thinking.  Maybe we should start seeing if we can petition the higher ups to get us more expert systems.�

�Why?�

�Well, it occurred to me after the meeting that one of the reasons Scenario 34 didn�t have enough random elements � making it too much of a �typical day� - is we haven�t been focusing as much on the background as we should be.  Things like people in the crowd, stores, books in a library.  I mean look what tripped us up this time.  We've been paying too much attention on main characters.  Secondary characters like Hiroshi and Daisuke hardly count as characters at all.  They're just the leaders of the boy's chorus!  If Ranma starts noticing mistakes from them who knows what could happen if he asks some stranger on the streets for anything more complex then simple directions.�

�Hmm, I see what you mean, but I can tell you we're talking a hundred million yen a piece for one of those things.  Nabiki's going to love that.�

�Occupational hazard.  I'm sure we can get Mom to sweet-talk her into it.�

�Yeah, let me handle it though.  It is a hardware issue after all, I should be able to,� Ukyo paused for a second thinking, �you made me the okonomiyaki chef didn�t you?�

�You're really beginning to obsess about that aren't you?�

�Arrgh!  I knew it!  This is because I stole Tatchi from you in college, isn�t it?�

�Oh yeah,� Akane grinned.�

�Come on, he was a pompous ass, I was doing you a favor!�

�It's the principle of the thing.�

�Fine, be that way.  See if I lend you any of my CDs anymore.�

�Look, Ukyo I'm sorry.  It was funny at the time.  And as I said, we'll be phasing out the schtick soon enough anyhow.  The virtual Ukyo is almost as important as the virtual Akane in guiding Ranma towards lucidity.�

�Oh all right, I forgive you,� Ukyo said in a mock pout.

�So I can still borrow your CDs?�

�Oh alright.�

�Even your Dave Brubeck collection?�

�Don�t push it.�

# # # # # # # #  # #

�I trust everyone had a good nights sleep?� Nodoka asked as everyone entered the control room.

�Like a baby Mrs. S,� Ukyo grinned.  Kasumi and Akane nodded in agreement.

�That�s good, lets get to it then shall we.  I've already started booting up the system.  Yuka? If you would do the liberties, Ranma should be ready for the REM session.�

The crew watched one of the monitors showing Ranma's dream.  He was walking through the mist looking very confused.  Far ahead of him was a castle in the mountains.  �Very nice work, Akane,� Nodoka nodded,

�Thank you, Mother.  The idea is to give him a sense of foreboding, giving some hints pointing towards the final act.  But most importantly he won't be thinking about Scenario 34.�

�Good, now hurry up everyone - he won't be asleep for long,� Nodoka instructed her crew.

�I'm turning the scenery on now, Mrs. Saotome, �Kasumi pressed a few buttons.  The image of Ranma's room appeared on the main screen.

�Environment on Mrs. Saotome,� Yuka said.  The noise of rain from outside his window could be heard.

�Good, booting up the cast members right now.� A sleeping panda appeared next to Ranma as Nodoka typed his name on the keyboard.

�Okay everybody - we're running Family Comedy Scenario 75.  Lets make it good,� Akane placed the disk into the slot.

�Excellent, good morning Ranma,� Nodoka smiled as she pushed the button.

# # # # # # # #  # #

Ranma woke with a start and looked around at his surroundings.  He was in his room, his father was still asleep and snoring loudly.  �Well, at least I won't get dunked this time,� he thought to himself as he got up and went to look out the window.

It was raining outside and didn�t look as if it would let up for another hour or so.  All in all it looked like it was going to be another typical day.






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