I know very little about El Hazard, but this
fic was funny enough to make me comment anyway...

"I've seen true Evil, Ranma... and her name is
Chibi-Usa! So... pink, and
so... fluffy... I tried to escape an entire week!"

      If Chibi-Usa is a True Evil, then what would
C-ko be?  The Ultimate Evil?

"Ranma! How dare you kick me in the balls and run
away, you coward!"

      For once, Ryoga's anger is righteous.  Miracles
do happen, I guess.

"Are ya stupid or something?" the pigtailed boy
shouted at his companion in
disbelief. "She wanted me to sleep with her! What
did ya want me to do, say
'yes'?"

"At least we wouldn't be here, then!" Ryoga retorted
angrily, making another
attempt to kill him.

"Oh man, you are stupid," Ranma said with a sigh.
"If there's anyone to
blame here, it's you! Who was it that lead us to
this stupid dungeon in the
first place, P-Chan?!"

      I don't really get this part.  Did Ranma piss
off
Rune Venus by his rejection?  Did Ryoga cause some
sort
of trouble that ended them up in a cell?  Either way,
I don't think the guards (or anyone in the castle, for
that matter), can restrain them long enough to
imprison
them.

"You too can stay, Dead Meat," the Princess said
offhandedly.

      I like this latest nickname for Ryoga.  It's
just
so... fitting, for some reason.

"And besides," Rune Venus continued, unabashed. "You
look just like her!
Well, almost. Her hair's red, and she doesn't put it
in a pigtail... and you
are a very handsome man while she's an annoying
little brat... and the
muscles on your arms are just..."

      This part seems really forced.  If Rune Venus
isn't aware of Ranma's curse yet, and she thinks male
Ranma and Fatora doesn't look alike very much, why
did she get the substitution idea in the first place?
It would be more natural to have her begging Ranma to
pose as her husband (like she says in the later
paragraphs) rather than as her sister.

Most of his anger left him at that point, and Ryoga
subconsciously rubbed
the back of his head. That girl sure could pack a
punch!

      What girl after Ranma does NOT pack a punch?

Rune Venus sighed heavily, massaging her temples.
"Go back to your posts."
As the soldiers obliged, she continued telling
herself, 'It's not Ranma's
fault. Nothing is Ranma's fault. He is too perfect.'

      The girl-magnet enhancement is getting to a
ridiculous level, it seems.  But why isn't it working
as an enhancement for guy-magnet when Ranma's female?

Upon yelling "Bakusai Tenketsu!" for the fortieth
time, the ground
underneath her rumbled and a myriad of sharp stones
erupted from underneath
El Hazard's surface.

      40th time?  Hmm...  Oh well, I guess that's
within a reasonable range.

"One night too much," the Princess retorted with a
pout.

"Hey! What about MY GROIN?!"

Everyone turned to look at Ryoga, who had realized
just what he had yelled
out loud.

Rune Venus frowned. "Guards! Dead Meat is acting
like a pervert again."

      She's being surprisingly calm, given that Ryoga
has just commited a serious case of sexual harassment.

"This... isn't Fatora?" Alielle asked quietly. "This
is a guy?" After taking
the liberty to explore Ranma's body on her own, she
smiled lecherously,
exclaiming, "He's a hunk!" and latching onto his
right foot.

The pigtailed boy fainted.

      Even Alielle is after Ranma's guy form now?  If
the "enhancement" is THIS strong, then why aren't the
maids and other females in the palace after him as
well?  Only the important characters are after him?

The cat complied, and Ranma scurried over to the
flying transport, Alielle
still attached to him. He raised the ramp and
quickly waved his hand at the
ropes holding the transport in place, willing them
to release it.

Ranma's face adopted a surprised expression when the
ropes snapped, as if
cut by a knife. 'Hmm, gotta be the air pressure,' he
thought, wrinkling his
forehead, his problems momentarily forgotten.
'Cool!'

      Telekinesis power?  This is getting
interesting...  Why would he get any, though?

A very handsome man, Kiriya had to admit.

Was it getting hot in there? Mount Muldoon began to
feel like the Desert of
Bleached Bones.

Kiriya's right eye twitched. There was no time to
think about the
temperature! She had to get the boy's name and
address!

The woman blinked. That couldn't be right. She had a
crossbow in her hand...
why? Was she supposed to do something with it?

      This is starting to border on brainwashing.
Ranma may not have to fight much in this series if
this keeps up.  He is affecting women like a
MegaPlayBoy from DNA^2.

"It must be the foul Saotome's dark magicks!" Londs
proclaimed, rising to
his feet and shaking his right fist at the Heavens
in righteous fury. "I
shall send ten soldiers after him... twenty... our
entire army!"

      I would just love to see him talking to Kuno...

"Don't you dare lay a hand on my Ran-chan!" Rune
Venus cried out,
backhanding Londs. The man was sent off his feet
reeling from the blow and
flew out of the balcony, screaming like a little
girl as the ground rushed
to meet him.

      "Ran-chan"?  Hoo boy...

'What is your power, Ranma?' Rune Venus thought,
sighing wistfully.

      The power to inspire fanfic writers than any
other anime character can. ^_^

Besides, duty always came first! She would go and
work... maybe gamble a bit
afterwards and get a few drinks. And he would just
wait for her at home,
always happy to serve her every whim... all night
long...

"Hey, are you alright?" Ranma asked with concern,
waving a hand in front of
the girl's face, which was visibly burning up.

She leaned into his loving embrace, sensing the
obviously shy boy's desire
to hold her in his arms.

      Is it just me, or is Ranma's "enhancement"
getting stronger with every new girl he charms?

Shayla-Shayla sighed sadly. Poor guy. He was
obviously telling the truth,
for how could he lie?

      Yup, it's a brainwashing.

Ranma sighed. This wasn't fair! Even Nerima wasn't
that bad. Well, except
for that Kodachi chick going gaga on him. Or Shampoo
doing the same after he
beat her by accident. Or Ucchan falling for him at
the age of six when he
beat her up. And again, after he mentioned she was
cute. Or the girls at
school when he smiled at them occasionally...

The boy blinked.

This had _always_ been so bad! Well, almost. Akane
didn't love him. Or did
she? She had to, based on the other examples. Then
again, she could have
been the exception to the rule.

      Don't worry Ranma, it WILL get worse than in
Nerima.

"Indeed!" his companion in a white gi thundered,
brushing a hand against his
golden spiky hair. "All your bases are belong to
us!"

      GOLDEN SPIKY HAIR!?  Oh, please tell me it's
not so!

Genma released the teenager, turning towards his
friend swiftly. "Come, S--
Hidden Dragon! We must fight evil and right wrongs
once again!"

The crowd cheered as they took off into the sky,
turning into small dots on
the horizons mere moment later. The reason for their
festivities became
evident to Yvgeny once he noticed that the two
strangers left without
finishing their meal, leaving enough food for the
entire village to exist
for a month in relative luxury.

      It IS so!  Argh... X_X;  Oh well, at least it is
someone different from usual.

Ranma blinked, an idea forming in his head. 'Could
this be the legendary
Lesbo-ken?'

      Yeah, try gathering lots of lesbians and throw
them in a pit.  They will be too busy with each other
to notice you.

Eventually he sat on the ground, facing away from
the Lost Boy's comatose
body as the beating went on, crossing his legs as he
did so. Ura was a male
cat, after all.

      I guess Ryoga's groin is the "hot spot" of this
fic...  Hey, put that gun down! ^_^;

"I'll tell you what. If you know how to find this
Ranma, I'll help you out!"
Miz smiled again, wondering, 'Ranma... why does his
very name make me
shiver?'

      Now just his name is exciting women.  It IS
getting stronger.

Miz shook out of her daydream, looking at the feline
in horror. 'The Enemy
of All That Lives!'

"Can it be?" Miz murmured softly to herself.

"Can what be?" two voices asked from behind her.

Turning around with Ura in her hands, she saw two
younger women standing
there, one with a smirk on her face.

"Afura! Shayla! We must hurry!" Miz yelled, grabbing
each of them by an arm.

      "We have just been crossed over with Slayers!"

Deciding it was time for more drastic measures to
wake his companion up
before the angry females decided to return and dish
out more punishment, Ura
steeled himself and sank his teeth deeply into
Ryoga's groin...

      Ouch.  Ryoga will become impotent at this rate.

      Funny fic, but I think you are rushing the pace
a little too much...

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