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The FFML Refugee List
Kentucky Fried Nerima
A Multi-SI Ranma Fic
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Prologue
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By: Master Jahaj
Manus Nigrum
Hervadicus
Disclaimer:
I don't own any of Takahashi's characters. I'm only using
them because I'm too impatient to make my own manga/anime
series.
# - # - # - # - #
Life among the gods had become calm as of late. No longer were
they troubled by the great chaotic factors that had caused man to
fear for his life over a simple change of the calendar year. No,
life had come to a halt to which one could relax and take in the
simple pleasures of immortal existence.
This only fueled the flames of Chaos's anger.
It was not the fact that life had become too dull and mundane,
for that he was occasionally grateful for. No, it was the fact
that the greatest chaos in centuries, the very thing that he had
spent nearly a millennium on had come to a screeching stop in
less than a year. The great chaos known as Y2K had been his best
long-term project because of mans advances in technology and war
had been halted far too quickly for his tastes.
Not only had he failed to have as much fun as he wanted during
the reign of chaos, the after effects left him with nothing to
do. In short, Chaos was angry and bored.
Not only was he bored, but also without the power from his
usual worshipers, he didn't have the strength to do any of his
normal distractions. To sum it up, Chaos was bored, angry, and
tired.
"Hey Chaos." a female voice startled him. Chaos turned to see
his partner in crime, Disorder. He watched her feline form walk
up to him and sighed.
"Hey Disorder, anything new?"
"Naw," she plopped down beside him. "Nuthin' ever happens after
the turn of the millennium."
"True, true."
"WHAZUUUUUP!" A random pixie blurted out. The two felines
merely stared at it with looks that said 'That was pathetic'
before swatting it like fly.
"I'll never understand those damned things," Chaos said
receiving a nod from his companion. After a long silence, Chaos
sighed, "I'm bored."
Disorder merely looked at him with a blank expression. "And
when has that been a problem with all those realities you and
Toltiir made with the infamous Bet?"
"Yeah, well. Those things can only entertain you for so long."
"I know, why don't we just send some random mortal into another
plane?"
Chaos started to chuckle, then laugh, and finally was rolling
around on the floor convulsing with laughter while Disorder sweat
dropped.
"Th- That's only *chuckle* been done *snicker* more times than
THE BET!" Chaos glared. "I mean how MANY times have we taken some
DEADBEAT LOOSER and thrown them in a reality where they SOLVE ALL
THE PROBLEMS or become some HOT SHOT that thinks they're a
GOD!?!"
By this point, Disorder was cringing back in fear with her eyes
wide enough to fit a large pizza in and still be able to see
around it. Let us note that an angry Chaos is a dangerous Chaos,
even to the Gods.
"Well, why stop at one?" she meekly suggested.
Chaos stopped and blinked. Turing is head to one side he
blinked again. Then slowly, a menacing smile started to form on
his lips.
"Well, now. _That_ could be.... interesting"
- * - * - * - * -
Mike growled at the computer screen. After nearly ten hours of
work and countless revisions, his masterpiece of scientific
knowledge was finished and ready to be presented to his professor
for a well-deserved 'A'. Too bad it was four pages too short.
Mike growled again.
"I give up." He stated with a tired head-smack onto the desk.
"Seven hours till it's due and I'm only halfway there. I'll never
get it done." He was brought out of his rut of self-pity by the
impact of a box of Cracker Jacks to the head. "WHAT THE HELL WAS
_THAT_ FOR?!?" He bellowed at his roommate.
"Man, if you were any more depressed I'd think you'd try and
kill yourself over that damned thing," Roush replied, shaking his
head in mock disgust.
"Well, excuuuuse me if I have a teacher that decides to have us
write an eight-page paper on how our favorite TV show is
destroying the _planet_ over the weekend!"
Roush responded only by calmly flipping to the next page of the
book he was reading and resumed reading. Mike let out a growl of
frustration and slammed his head back onto the desk. After a few
minutes of silence, Roush resumed his conversation.
"You know, Daniel just got in the last EVA tape."
"Yeah, so?"
Roush dropped his book and grabbed Mike by the arm. "So, that
means we're going to go to his dorm and watch it."
At that moment, Mike decided to give up for a while. 'Who
knows,' he thought, 'maybe I can get some inspiration.'
- * - * - * - * -
"Oh come on! At least start it in a different place!" Chaos
argued. While it wasn't unusual to find Chaos arguing with people
(hey it brought out his true nature) it was unusual to see him
arguing about wrecking his _favorite_ reality. Currently, he and
Disorder had a disagreement about _when_ they should throw the
unsuspecting fools, I mean people, into the time stream.
"Everyone starts _there_. Can't you be even a _little_ unique?"
"Yeah, yeah, yeah. I guess you're right, but I still think they
should stay in one place. That way the fun gets brought to them."
"Ok. Lets put them over here about here. That work for ya?"
"That'll do, but what about background info? Shouldn't we at
least make up something?"
Chaos shrugged, "Let's just wing it. That's how things get
fun."
"And the people? Who are we gonna get?"
Chaos looked around at all the pathetic losers on the planet
and finally gave up and pointed at a random group. "Them."
- * - * - * - * -
"That's it?" Mike stared at the screen showing the credits to
End of EVA. "All that and he kills her?"
"Talk about a let down." Daniel began rewinding the tape. "I
thought they'd do _something_ better."
"Well, I thought it was pretty good except for that." Roush
chimed in.
"Yeah, Shinji is sitting there saying 'I just killed everyone on
the planet...except HER! DIE! DIE! DIE! DIE! DIE!' I mean, I could
come up with a better ending to _any_ show than that!"
"Care to try?" a voice behind them asked. The trio of otaku
turned around to face a pair of Gods, Chaos and Disorder.
"AAAAAAARGH!" was the general consensus between them as they
tried, vainly, to get away. For a moment, let us take a look at
the forms both Gods have chosen to reveal themselves. Both were
three and a half foot tall cat, but that isn't what scared anyone.
What scared them was the fact that Chaos looked like an exact
replica of the Cheshire cat out of American McGee's Alice. A light
gray coat of fur covered an enormous head with equally large
pointy teeth, a thin, almost frail, body, and paws that were the
size of a man's head. Disorder, on the other hand, looked like a
_very_ large tabby but made out of every piece of material that a
fabric store couldn't sell. Which one looked scarier, the gothic-
type feline or the patchwork kitty? Who cares, they both give me
the willies.
"Don't you think your lives are a little...dull?" Chaos asked.
"You want to try something _really_ exciting?" Disorder
continued.
"Will it get me out of my paper?" Mike asked, not wanting to
finish it and wanting something to do.
Chaos smiled. 'Sucker,' he thought. "Maybe..."
"Count me in!"
"You can't be serious!" Roush exclaimed.
"A giant talking cat just asked us to have fun and get out of
class and you think I'm _not_ gonna take it?" Mike retorted.
Roush and Daniel looked at each other. "Well, when you put it
that way...I'm in." "Me too."
"Excelent." Chaos smiled. "Here we go!" and with a flash of
light and a loud *PING*, The three mortals and two gods
disappeared.
# - # - # - # - #
Author's notes:
Yes, I know, _another_ stupid SI fic right? Maybe, but things
start to get interesting in the first couple of chapters along
with some drastic changes to the cast and their reactions later
on. One HUGE change of pace is that I'll tend to skip around in
the storyline as well as combine both the manga and anime,
depending on which one I think is better. Also, a lot of stuff you
won't see because the SI-rs (the people we are in the story) don't
see a lot of stuff, but hear about it from the main characters.
Finally, you get to hear what goes on outside the show from
different perspectives.
C&C Welcomed. Flames extinguished (I hate fire hazards)
http://masterjahaj.hypermart.net
Master Jahaj
Manus Nigrum
Hervadicus
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
desaix@sysnet.net
Sir Desaix, member # 116 of the Knights of the True Fiancee
anime fanfics available at
http://www.geocities.com/zednik.geo/fanfics.htm
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