The Intense Challenge


A "Bob The Angry Flower"/"Ranma 1/2" Crossover
by W4

DISCLAIMER 1: "Ranma 1/2" and all characters within are the
intellectual property of Rumiko Billy Ray Joe Bob Takahashi.

DISCLAIMER 2: "Bob The Angry Flower" can be found at
http://www.angryflower.com/ and is the intellectual property of Stephen
Notley.

DISCLAIMER 3: Reading disclaimers has been proven to cause drowsiness
and cravings for cheese in lab rats. If a craving for cheese develops,
please stop reading disclaimers.

*/ \*

"WOWZA!" Bob The Angry Flower shouted, smiling and holding a bottle of
Pocari Sweat. "I can't believe that I'm finally in Japan! Now I can buy
some SERIOUS toothpicks!"

Stumpy sighed, "Why didn't you just go to the supermarket to get
toothpicks?"

"Simple, my friend," Bob explained. "You see-"

Bob was cut off by a loud shout of "KACHU TENSHIN AMAGURIKEN!" He and
Stumpy watched as a boy with a yellow shirt, green pants and a yellow
bandana with black spots crashed into the side of a building and passed
out.

"HOLY SHIT!" Bob cried out. "YEAH! Take THAT, you Village Person!"

Stumpy noticed the emergence of the boy's opponent. "Hey, Bob. Look
over there."

Bob turned. "Huh?"

"Don't you know who that is?" Stumpy asked.

Bob rubbed his chin and looked thoughtfully at the newcomer. "...No."

"Look again. Red Chinese shirt. Black Chinese pants. Black
probably-not-Chinese hair tied in a pigtail."

"Yeah. So?"

Stumpy turned and sighed in exasperation. "That's Ranma Saotome! The
famous martial artist! The only thing more amazing than his fighting
ability is that he changes genders when splashed with water."

Bob chuckled once. "You don't say?" he mentioned.

"I wouldn't tease him about it, though," Stumpy warned. "He's an
excellent fighter."

Bob grinned evilly. "Stumpy, my boy... I have a cunning plan..."

*/ \*

That evening, Bob knocked at the front door of the Tendo Dojo. Kasumi
answered. "Good evening, Mr. Flower. May I help you?"

"I would like to see Ranma Saotome," Bob explained.

Kasumi smiled and nodded. "I'll get him for you," she said with a bow.
She walked back into the dojo, softly calling, "Ranma-kun! A giant
talking flower is here to see you!"

Ten seconds passed. Bob idly rubbed his petals together.

"Yes?" Ranma asked, poking his head out of the front door.

Bob gave Ranma a sidelong glance. "Oh. So YOU'RE Ranma Saotome," he
remarked.

"Yeah. What of it?" Ranma responded testily.

"What of it indeed..." Bob mused. He then pulled out a paper bag,
smiled wide and pulled a chocolate doughnut out of the bag. "Would you
like to buy a chocolate doughnut for fifty yen?"

Ranma blinked. "...Sure," he answered.

Bob handed Ranma the doughnut, and Ranma handed Bob fifty yen. "Enjoy
your doughnut!" Bob called cheerfully as he left the dojo.

Ranma nodded, devoured the doughnut in one gulp and closed the door.

Bob smiled evilly to himself. "Now... all I have to do is wait..."

*/ \*

Bob returned to the Tendo Dojo an hour later. He knocked at the door.

"Yes?" Ranma answered.

"I have returned, Ranma Saotome," Bob gravely said. "Earlier this
evening, you bought a doughnut from me for a ridiculously low price."

Ranma blinked in confusion. "Yeah. So?" he asked.

Bob produced a glass of milk and smiled. "Would you like to buy a glass
of milk for seventy-five yen?" he cheerfully asked.

Ranma blinked in confusion. "I don't see why not," he answered.

Bob handed Ranma the glass of milk, and Ranma handed Bob seventy-five
yen. "A pleasure doing business with you, Ranma!" Bob shouted as he
left.

"You too!" Ranma responded.

Bob walked over to Stumpy and nodded once. "It's done. Let us leave."

Stumpy threw his arms up. "Selling him food? That's your cunning plan?
Is there something I'm missing?"

Bob paused and looked towards the sky. "Stumpy, my boy... if I have to
explain it to you, you'll never understand," he sagely commented.

*/ \*

AUTHOR'S NOTE: E-FLAT

Author's notes, like their literary cousins, the disclaimers, cause
drowsiness and cheese cravings in lab rats. Therefore, I don't have any
author's notes. None whatsoever. You're reading text THAT DOESN'T
EXIST! NEENER NEENER NEENER!

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