Akane Tendo, wearing a leather jacket and tight blue jeans (and nothing else), entered and snorted at the place.  It was a nice living room-turned-theater, with a couch big enough for three people, a coffee table and four recliners, but she still resented it.  Still, she had promised to be here.  Scratching her ear near her latest piercing, she headed for the couch and sat down, putting her feet up on the coffee table.  Kodachi Kuno, wearing an exquisite kimono, entered next and glared at Akane.
    "Akane-chan, please, show some respect.  This table was carved by an obvious master." Kodachi requested.
    "Fine, fine." Akane replied, having just noticed the Kuno girl.  She had been lost in contemplation over how she herself would look with a nose ring. She came to the conclusion that it would be about the same as if anyone else looked with one, butt ugly.
    "Who else is coming?" Kodachi inquired, seating herself to Akane's left.
    "Well, Ryoga, Nabsie, Ucchan and Shin... I'm not sure about anyone else.  Mister A wanted a representative from each of the seven." Akane replied.
    "Akane, you should at least exposition it for our readers." Kodachi scolded.
    "WHAT?!  Shut the fuck up, bitch." Akane retorted.
    Kodachi turned to you, the reader, and began to exposit, "You see, since A-kun found this story, a tale of the World of Darkness, he decided he should comment on it with an appropriate team of MSTers.  I.E. people who are also in the World of Darkness.  However, the only story he has for it is Roku-Bun No San 3, which is still in production, but he felt no harm if we do this little MSTing."
    Kodachi looked at Akane, hoping to break up her need to make a long exposition herself.
    Akane relented, "All right, all right, FINE.  Listen up, bitches, 'cause I don't like to repeat.  I'm a 13th Generation Brujah.  Ko-chan is a 10th Gen Toreador, Nabiki is an 8th Gen Ventrue, Ucchan's an 8th Gen Malkavian and Ryouga's a 9th Gen Gangrel.  Shin (Saotome) is Ucchan's Ghoul, but he's scaring everyone with his ability to advance further than what he should be allowed."
    As if on cue, the four named-but-not-yet-appearing characters entered.  Ryouga had tiger-like ears and slitted eyes.  Nabiki was wearing a three-piece lavender business suit and wore shades, but otherwise, looked the same as before.  Ukyou was wearing what appeared to be a plug suit from Neon Genesis Evangelion.  Shin seemed to radiate confidence.  Other than that, they all looked about the same as they would have in the normal Ranma 1/2 universe (Shin taking Ranma's place, naturally).  They all seated themselves, Shin sitting to Akane's right with Ukyou in his lap while Nabiki and Ryouga took seats in the recliners.
    The wall opposite of the seats changed into a massive screen.  A-kun's hairy face appeared, startling all of the people present.
    "HEY!  HE'S BREAKING THE MASQUERADE!" Ukyou protested.
    "Shut up." A-kun deadpanned to the Malkavian, before noting the two empty seats, "What?!  They aren't here yet?"
    "No sir, dumbass-san." Shin grinned.
    A-kun glared at his own demented creation, then sighed.  With a gesture, the two extras appeared.  The first was a fairly ugly 7th Generation Nosferatu named Alexander Danov (see Vampire: The Masquerade 2nd Edition example story for details).  He was mostly bald with thin patches of hair and a black all-encompassing cloak to hide the rest of his body.  Thick circles surrounded his eyes, giving an almost tired, but feral look.
    "I don't know, he looks no worse than your brother's wife." Akane told A-kun.
    "I'd agree." A-kun snorted.
    The second was a 8th Generation Tremere by the name of Flaw.  She looked like a perfectly ordinary 10 year old brown-haired girl, but she had a fierce gaze that proved she was anything but ordinary.  She wore a blue dress and had bright blue eyes.
    "Why Flaw?  And why Alexander, shouldn't we have M-" Shin asked.
    "SHHH!  You'll ruin the story!" A-kun hissed at Shin.
    Shin shrugged in response.  Flaw and a reluctant Danov sat down.
    "Now, this fanfic is by P-R-P-Chan and-" A-kun began.
    "Hold it!  We're supposed to be treated like kings if we're going to be tortured by monkey dung." Nabiki scowled.
    "Hey, P-R-P-Chan.... well, okay, I don't agree with some of this story, but his works aren't monkey dung." A-kun protested.
    "You said, we'd have free blood and Shin would get all the pop and snacks he wanted."
    "Yes, you can have what you want once we change formats.  The story is by P-R-P-Chan and neB.  It's called Diablerie: Nerima.  And it's about Ranma 1/2.  Anyway, I'll let him tell the story." A-kun informed them, using his authorly powers to change formats.

===============================================================================================

Ukyou: SWEET! ^_^

Akane: [looking in a mini-fridge that appeared in the place of the coffee table] Who wants their blood magically heated?

    [Can-O-Bloods are handed out and Shin takes a Mountain Dew.]

prpchan <prpchan@colba.net>

Shin: Colba, Colba, Colba.... hey, is that a discipline, a magical artifact or a clan?

Alexander: [grinning][Kasumi] Oh my, Perp-chan, would you like some tea?

Diablerie:Nerima
by: neB and P-R-P-Chan

Ukyou: ^_^ !yalpsdlihc s'tI  !fi sA  .sdrawkcab kaeps ot woh swonk eno on ekil stca eH

Nabiki: [Police man on a radio] KSSHT! We have the perp in custody, over! KSSHT!

Prologue

Flaw: Prologue, Star Date 255871169832274938201 dash 56881 point 79344 negative 2.

Shin: [to Flaw] Why are you guys always depicted as Star Trek fans?

Flaw: Because 78% of us are.  It's a side effect of that damn Gene Roddenberry's spell.  He was a fscking Virtual Adept and as a joke, he wove a spell into each episode so that we'd love his works.  When we found out, we ground him up and made him into Oscar Meyer weiners.  The body they found and buried was the pet cat of a Tremere who had passed on.

Ranma woke with a start.  It was about midnight, a hot summer night in
Nerima.  He had heard the door slam downstairs.  He rose and went onto
the head the stairs and watched as Akane slowly approached.  She was in
her own world, swaying slightly,

Akane: WHAT?!  I'm not a fscking Toreador, dumbass!

Kodachi: Hey!

Akane: Sorry.

and drenched in blood.

Akane: Okay, maybe I was high on blood.

Alexander: It's better than sex.

Ukyou, Nabiki, Akane, Kodachi, Ryouga and Shin: [in unison] Only back before you were embraced.

Alexander: Really?  [they nod]  Shit.

 She looked up
and met Ranma's wide-eyed gaze.

Kodachi: One, two, when did Ranma grow a third eye?

Flaw: [clenching her teeth] Stop teasing me!

Kodachi: [singing] For Saulot's a jolly good fellow, For Saulot's a jolly good fellow, for  Saulot's a jolly good FELLOOOOOOW!  Which Tremere can never deny!

    [Flaw flares with anger, but a glare from Shin forces her to settle down.]

Shin: Yeah, Ko-chan... besides, Ranma'd be Brujah like Akane.

Ryouga: Hey!  I'll have you know he'd be a Gangrel with all the traveling he's done!

Shin: No, Brujah.  He might learn Protean from a Gangrel, but he's probably be a Brujah.

"A-A-Akane? Are you ok?"

Akane: Hey, it's Magical Rappin' Ranma!

"Fine Ranma, just fine.  You know, you really shouldn't worry so much
about me."

Ryouga: [Akane, with a sidewound that's spurting blood like a drinking fountain] Really, no need to worry, none whatsoever.  Really.  None.  Really.

"I'm NOT worried! I'm definately not worried, but you ARE covered in
blood..."

Flaw: Yeah and don'tcha know, getting blood out of clothing is a bitch unless you have a Tremere with.

Nabiki: [in droll tone] Oh, should I look to the Tremere for all my dry cleaning needs?  And do you do bar mitzvahs too?

"I'm alright Ranma...," Akane said, as her eyes began to glow, "next
ting you know, you'll wake up and find out that this was all a really
weirs dream. So wake up Ranma...wake UP RANMA..."

Ryouga: Oh no!  It's a weirswolf!

Kodachi: I must say, Shin, your other self isn;t very well-trained.

Shin: Yeah, I call no way.  Akane never had the patience to practice Domination.

Akane: [to Shin in a warning tone] Shin, I have Potence 4 and Celerity 3.  Don't piss me off!

Shin: I have maxed physical stats, Potence 5, Fortitude 5 _and_ Celerity 5.  I'm not worried.

"WAKE UP STUPID...ARRRRGHH!!!"

    [Shin, Ryouga and Alexander all wince in unison.]

Ranma's eyes flew open at the sound of Akane's voice.  "Of everything
that could possibly be the first sight i see in the morning, why do i
have to be unlucky enough to see your face?!?"

All: WHOA!

Shin: Damn, that's a vicious comment.  Think Akane can soak it?

Ukyou: She doesn't have Fortitude, remember? ^_^

Shin: Oh yeah...

Akane's face grew crimson.  "WHAAAT??" She screamed, her voice rising
an octave or two.

Nabiki: [arching an eyebrow] Actually, now that I think about it, how is this Akane able to go out during the day.  We've seen that she can't take anything Ranma dishes out, so she can't have Fortitude.

Kodachi: Perhaps a new discipline?

Ukyou: Are you kidding?  The only thing Akane has any discipline to learn are new positions in the Karma Sutra, [winking at the Brujah] ne Akane-chan? ^_^

    [Akane's face turns crimson with embarrassment.]

"It's bad enough that i had that stupid dream about you last ni..
oops.."

Flaw: Akane must not be any good at Domination either.  I mean, if she couldn't erase Ranma's memory, it's definitely not at Level 3.

Shin: Well, maybe she didn't score enough successes.

"WHAT DREAM?!?"

Ryouga: What's up with the screaming jag, Akane?

Akane: I don't scream that often.  I have enough control to yell or shout, but I rarely 'scream'.

Kodachi: Unless I threaten to feed your 'Fake' anime to my plastic-eating plants.

Akane: [screaming] YOU WOULDN'T DARE!

Shin: Jeez, Akane, just go to Jusenkyo and then visit a gay bar.  Shit, it's not like it's a big goddamn deal.  Every fscking author who does a SI story eventually winds up with the gender-swapping curse sooner or later.

Nabiki: I want to know what's with A-kun's selective cursing.  I mean, he allows 'Shit', but he changes 'fuck' into 'fsck'.

A-kun's Voice Over: Words describing defecation aren't actually swear words in my vocabulary unless small children are around.  Words describing sexual intercourse are reserved for mature audiences.  And that's mental maturity, not physical maturity.

"Well...er..."

Shin: Give it up, bro, ain't no way you'll get a chance to explain.

Nabiki: Actually, maybe if Ranma keep quiet when Akane demanded an answer, Akane would be more willing to listen after she waited.  I mean, trying to answer immediately when someone notorious for interupting one's response demands it?  Make her wait.

Akane: Jeez, looking at my other self, I'm wondering how she keeps from going into Horrid Form. (Vicissitude 4, if memory serves)

Ukyou: Still, you have to wonder what clan she is in this. ^_^

"You pervert!! I can't beleive you're having sick dreams about me!!!
You're even worse than Happosai!"

Shin: Hey, Master Happosai was fairly nice...

Nabiki: In their world, he's worse than Master Roshi from Dragon Ball.

Shin: Oh.

 There was a resounding smack as Akane
malleted Ranma over the head.

Alexander: You know, I always wondered how you people survive that sort of damage.

Shin: Well, Ranma has Fortitude, so he can just soak.

Alexander: Ah.

Ryouga: Geez, maybe he should have been a Gangrel.  Earth Meld would be useful for getting out of the way.

Shin: Nah, she's just park a car over him or something.

 Ranma, as a result, got silly.

Nabiki: Akane, promise me something.

Akane: Yes?

Nabiki: Never, ever learn Dominate.  You stink at it.

Akane: Hey!

Nabiki: Ranma's acting silly because you hit him.  I want to know how much training that would take.

Akane; Actually, why didn't my other self just dominate him into eventually becoming nicer to her?  And if she trained him to ignore anything involving her vampiric nature...

Shin: Forget it.  Ranma's an idiot savant.  You try and get him to ignore something and then leave him alone and he'll see it.  Remember?  You have to do repeated conditioning and then continue that conditioning.  We humans can figure things out eventually.  May take us quite some time, but we _will_ manage.

Nabiki, at this exact moment poked her face around the door and
said,"If you two don't mind, could you finish your lover's quarrel and
come down to breakfast before it gets cold?"

All: She eats?

Ryouga: Maybe she barfs it up on her way to school?

Akane: And what's with this school crap?  Why doesn't she just dominate the teachers and principal into graduating her early?

Nabiki: Well, for one, she'd still have to find something to do during the day.  Secondly, early graduation is almost unheard of in Japan.  I'd have to fend off colleges that wanted me.

Ukyou: Hey, good thing most of us were out of High School before we were Embraced. ^_^

Ryouga: Yes, but that was just us.

It almost seemed to Ranma, that a forked tongue poked out of the corner
of Nabiki's mouth at that moment, but he just passed it off as a brain
hemmorage, induced by Akane's uncuteness.

Flaw: Uh....

Nabiki: [eye twitching] I'm a SETITE?!

Shin: Well, I don't know much about the lesser tribes, but maybe you're one of the Serpents of the Light or Children of Osiris?

Nabiki: I doubt the first one you listed.  Akane has to be a part of the Camarilla to care about Ranma knowing, so I can't be a Serpent of the Light or a Setite.  They both take double damage from light, numbskulls.  I'd have to be a Gaki to walk around in sunlight.

Akane: And you don't seem to be haunted by nightmares, so I doubt you're a Gaki.

Ukyou: Maybe you're careful about your exposure to sunlight? ^_^

"Don't even THINK it Ranma!!!" Akane screamed at the top of her uncute
lungs as she whacked Ranma again with the hammer.

Alexander: What Discipline does that?

Ukyou: Mine.  Demi-Reality.  ^_^

"You-u a-are s-so uncu-" Ranma stuttered as he passed ouy.

Kodachi: [staring at the word 'ouy'.] Is that pig-latin or a new word?

Ukyou: I think he meant 'poi' (sp?), the hawaiian-foodstuff. ^_^

"Nabiki! if you don't stop doing that, then he'll find out the truth!"

Nabiki: Yeah, Nabiki, stop doing that.  [sighing]  I've been around Ukyou too long.

Ukyou: I guess so. ^_^

"Well, Akane, if you don't stop treating him as one of your herd.."

Shin: [Ranma] Yeah, I'm just ordinary kine, dammit!

And with that comment, they turned and walked, arm in arm, to the
dining are.

Flaw: Think the misspellings will stop?

Ukyou: After the implied incestual lesbianism?  Probably not. ^_^

 They didn't notice Ranma listening in a semi-concious
state.

Alexander: [tattler voice] Ooooh, they're in trouble!

Diablerie:Nerima
by: neB and P-R-P-Chan
Chapter 1

Cologne looked up from her studies with a strange look upon her face.

Flaw: [Cologne] Damn Moliate!  I don't need this right now!

Ryouga: Isn't that a Wraith Arcanos?

Flaw: Oh come on, it would make the most sense.

Shin: That's what Moliate looks like?  I would've figured she had been mauled by someone using Vicissitude.

"Granddaughter, come here."

Alexander: [Cologne] And pull my finger...

Shampoo bounced over to Cologne,"Yes, Grandmother?"
"I fear for my son-in-law.  I feel he may be in danger.  I have had a
scrying vision.

Nabiki: [Shampoo] You mean you have nap?

Akane: [Cologne, whapping Shampoo] I keep telling you it's called meditation!

Shin: HEY!

 There are strange things afoot in Japan."

Kodachi: She _JUST NOW_ noticed that?

Nabiki: Most kindred are careful... well, enough to hide from vamp hunters.

"What so unusual about that, Grandmother?  This place weird to begin
with..."
"Strange things even for Nerima!"

    [The chirping of crickets becomes audible.]

Ryouga: [Shampoo] What so unusual about that, Grandmother?  This _is_ Nerima.  Tomobiki is in same district and there cat-bot that move in recently.  Fucking Technocracy.

"If Ranma in trouble, Shampoo help!"

Flaw: Actually, here's another question.  If Shampoo and Cologne are JUST NOW noticing things, why hasn't Akane or Nabiki begun to dominate them?

Shin: Maybe they were dominated, but like I said before, humans tend figure things out eventually.  If the kindred would prove themselves beneficial for society, I'm sure it would be the gay pride parades.  People would come to accept them as a part of the world.  And like homosexuals, vampires have been around for a _very_ long time.

Ranma pranced along the fence to school, while Akane ran ahead.

Ryouga: Shin, your brother is the _fruitiest_ dork I've ever seen.

Shin: Thanks tiger boy.

Ryouga: DON'T CALL ME TIGER BOY!

Shin: [Flaring with power] Care to try your luck?

Ryouga: ......

Flaw: [observing Shin] What discipline is that?

Shin: It's called 'Eidolon' and you can forget it, it's only open to Ghouls. You need to be at least partially alive to use it.

"Where're you going, Akane?"

Alexander: [Akane as the Brain] The same place I go every day, Ranma, to try and take over the world!

Nabiki: [Ranma] You mean Tokyo Tower?

Alexander: [Akane] Damn right and this time, I've got my Shinken all nice and polished!

"I'm late!!"

Kodachi: I'm late!!  I'm late!!  For a very important date!!

Akane: Oh come on, even Brujah calm down once in a while.

"For what? We're actually early, for once.  Which is strange
considering I practically needed medical attention."

Nabiki: His Fortitude is pretty astouding.

Shin: Actually, that's just his Stamina.  He hasn't used his Fortitude yet.

Flaw: He must have saved versus Dork Slap.

"I've got a meeting for the upcoming blood drive!"

All: [rolling their eyes] Oh, like he'll believe that.

"Hunh? But the blood drive isn't 'till next month, Akane."

Shin: We were right.

"Listen Ranma, I don't have time for your useless comments!"
"You're the one who'd commenting! I'm just asking questions."
"Shut up Ranma! What do you know about blo..HEY! Did you just call me
USELESS??"

Akane: YOU are useless.  I'm one of 'Beeki's best.

Nabiki: [drolly] Well, I guess so.  You certainly have more power than most of the non-regulars.

Ranma then discoverd how to fly.. at least for the block or two before

Akane: And she yells at Nabiki for breaking the Masquerade.  I'm not even going to acknowledge  her as 'Akane'.

Ryouga: Actually, I'm more worried by the fact that Ranma just developed a Discipline.

Ukyou: It's not a new discipline, he's using Celerity 10 and flapping his arms really fast. ^_^

he landed in a puddle of water, just freshly ladled out by the old woman
living down the street.

Flaw: Hey, what do you know?  There's a Thaumaturgy path I hadn't thought of.  But it's obviously been casting permanently on Jusenkyo.

Alexander: What's that?

Flaw: Lure of Water.

    [Everyone groans.]

"Damn!" Ranma yelled, "AND I JUST DID MY HAIR THIS MORNING!!!"

Shin; Since when have I or Ranma ever cared about our hair?

As the beatiful red-head approached the gates to the school, Shampoo
just had to bounce over and glomp hello.

Nabiki: [Hello] Oh, I've waited so long for you, Shampoo!

Akane: [Shampoo] Aiyah, I glomp wrong person!  Sorry Sister Hello, Shampoo go glomp Ranma now.

"Nihao, Ranma, Shampoo come sit on face?"

All: [0_0] EEEEWWW!  FACE WASN'T THAT HANDSOME!

Ukyou: What a great A-Team reference!  Hope you readers caught it! ^_^

"WHAT?!?!?"
"Shampoo learn that from american television show. It funny, no?"

Kodachi: Shampoo just stated the response she was going to get: No.

Shin: Yeah, there wasn't even a musical accompaniment.

"What are you doing here, Shampoo? I'm gonna be late."
"Shampoo come to save Ranma from terrible danger...and to give Ranma
freshly cooked ramen!!"

Akane: So she's going to save Ranma from the very thing she delivered?

Ukyou: Shampoo's funny that way. ^_^

"Danger..what danger? I'm sure Akane didn't make my lunch."
"SHUT UP RANMA!! stop making fun of my cooking!" Akane yelled as she
ran by,

Kodachi: She must have excellent hearing...

Ryouga: I refuse to believe that Akane could be a Gangrel.

nailing him over the head with the hockey stick she was
returning to the gym.

Nabiki: Hockey?  Sweet mother of Caine, why does she even bother with the rest of the Masquerade?  She's already breaking half the traditions right there!

Flaw: Somehow, I don't think she's Sired Ranma without permission.

Shin: And I somehow doubt she's got to worry about welcoming a Prince.

Nabiki: [glaring at him] Shut it, tight buns.

Shin: [grinning] Feeling frisky, are we?

Nabiki: [ignoring Shin's statement] Everyone knows Kindred are control every aspect of Hockey!

    [A particularly loud cawwing crow is heard flying nearby.]

"OW!! What'd you do that for?!"
"Here, Ranma, Shampoo kiss and make feel better!!"
"NO... OWW STOP THAT! YOU'RE HURTING ME... AKANE!! IT'S NOT WHAT YOU
THINK... I SWEAR IT!!!"

Kodachi: Yes, I doubt Shampoo could have taken Ranma's pants off that fast.  And what was Akane doing?

Akane: She's not even there, she's returning the hockey stick.  Poor Ranma's been so poorly dominated, he believes he's always being beaten on.

Lunchtime approached.  Ukyo cornered Ranma, just as he finished dousing
himself with hot water, and asked him to accompany her to an inviting
broom closetand sample some freshly cooked okonomiyaki.

Shin: And he's going to fall for it.

Alexander: He might not...

Shin: Look at his behavior so far.

Alexander: He is that naive, isn't he?

"Why did you store it in the closet... i mean couldn't you find a
better place to eat lunch?" Ranma asked as he was led away,
unsuspectingly.
Akane turned to Nabiki," Hey, where're they going?"

Nabiki: Into the broom closet.  Are your eyes failing you that badly, Akane?

"Ummm.. Akane.. you don't want to know."  Her forked tongue, however,
betrayed her as it flicked out and licked her lips, twice.

Shin: What the fsck is with her tongue?  I know she's a Setite, but still, you'd think she'd be able to control it.  I mean, shit, it takes a full blood point to activate it, if I recall Serpentis well enough.

"NOOOO!! I can't allow it!! He's MINE!!"

Akane, Ukyou, Nabiki and Kodachi: [in unison] What a bitch.

Nabiki glared at Akane.

Shin: [Nabiki] I spent a blood point on this tongue, bitch, don't make me use it!  I think it can do aggravated damage!

Akane: [grinning] You mean, irritating damage.

"I mean 'ours' dear sister.  We can share."  Akane said meekly.
"Of course YOU can share, sister"

Flaw: What's wrong with sharing?  Akane, Ukyou, Nabiki and Kodachi share Shin.

Shin: [puffing out his chest] Of course, I'm more man than any three women can handle.

    [The four aforementioned girls rolled their eyes.]

Meanwhile, in the broom closet...
"Hey Ukyo, I don't see any food.. hey let go of that-Oh!"
Half a minute later, Ukyo exited the closet, wiping her lips, with a
smile on her face.

Shin: Oh, that's nine and a half minutes shorter than any man will ever admit to!

Ryouga and Alexander: Damn straight!

 She turned back to Ranma, slumped over in the
corner, mouth wide open.

Kodachi: Look at that imitation of a sack of Idaho potatoes!  He must have maxed out his Acting score to do that!

"You won't tell anyone, will you," Ukyo said, girlishly, hands clenched
tightly to her chest, eyes positively aglow with delight.

All: AAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!  SHE'S USING BALL OF ABYSMAL FLAMES!  AND SHE GOT FIVE SUCCESSES!

Ryoga wandered through the streets clueless as to where he was,
perplexed by the activities of the night before.

Ukyou: [Ryouga] I remember the casino, the beer, and the babes, but I don't know understand where my car went.  ^_^

 He remembered Akane
hugging him closely and then seeing red, often his reaction to the close
company of females, but this time something was different.  When he woke
up this morning he felt particularly drained, but for him to lose that
much blood there must have been a damn good reason.

Alexander: Then she must have been naked.

Nabiki: Or stuffing him somewhere...

Akane: NABIKI!

Ryouga: HEY!  I get enough of that from those damn .jpgs!

Nabiki: I meant she put you under her pillow, silly.

 Now if only he
could figure it out.  Could it be that Akane had shown him a side she
hadn't before?

Akane: [angrily] And what 'side' might that be?

that could be the only explanation.  He always seemed to
forget what happened while he was P-chan... only vague hints and
recollections.  As soon as he found his way back to the Dojo, maybe
Ranma could answer his questions.  First he had to get back there, maybe
those penguins could help, they'd never steered him wrong before.

Ukyou: Well, he's either stoned, having a dream or in Antarctica. ^_^

Shin: With Ryouga?  It could be all three and he'd never notice.

Ryouga: Saotome, I'm warning you, I'll use Protean...

Shin: Bring it on, cat-boy, I've taken Vicissitude 3 and recovered.

Diablerie:Nerima
By: neB and P-R-P-Chan
Part 2

Akane sat in class simmering with anger.  The only thought that ran
through her mind was that her baka fiancee hadn't returned from lunch
yet.  At least he wasn't with Ukyo she thought,

Ukyou: [rolling her eyes] Yeah, he couldn't be with me, [CENSORED]ing me or [CENSORED] or [CENSORED] me while I [CENSORED] him or if I felt kinky, maybe even [CENSORED][CENSORED] [CENSORED][CENSORED] my [CENSORED][CENSORED][CENSORED] the [CENSORED][CENSORED][CENSORED] [CENSORED] with the [CENSORED] up his [CENSORED][CENSORED] while I [CENSORED][CENSORED].

Akane: HOLY [CENSORED]!  Can you do that?

Ukyou: Sure, Nabsie, Shin and I did it a few times with Kasumi. ^_^

the path her mind was
taking was betrayed as she scowled over at Ukyo.  She just grinned back,
eyes flashing, furthering Akane's indignation.

Shin: [as Akane] Darn her!  She's a higher generation than I am!

Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, the idiot decided to make
an appearence in the classrooom.

Nabiki: [grinning] Wait, I thought Akane was already in the classroom.

Kodachi: [Akane] BLAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!  I VANT TO VUCK YOU VILLY!

"WHAT TOOK YOU SO LONG, YOU PERV-oops..."

Kodachi: You can almost hear her being booted out.  Oh, wait, you can.

Ten seconds later, "I can't beleive you got me kicked out of class,
Ranma!"
"Me? What did I do? OUCH!! Hey, what'd you do that for??"

Akane: Usually people this loud are sent to the principal's office.

Flaw: But, upon seeing the principal of the school, it's too cruel a fate.

Akane just stood and fumed for about five minutes, until she looked up
and demanded, "So where were you for so long, huh?"
"Um..just working out..."
"With Ukyo?...YOU PERVERT!!!"
"Hey..It's not my fault-"

Alexander: Yeah, it was the half-minute.

Shin: Yeah, that wasn't nearly long enough for the chocolate to cool.

    [Ryouga, Flaw and Alexander stare at Shin.  Akane coughed as she simultaneously kicked Shin in the face.  Shin didn't even flinch.]

"Nihao Ranma, Shampoo bring fresh noodles, and help in time of need!"
Shampoo announced, as she calmy crashed through the wall.
"Oh, Ranma, I see.  YOU WERE WITH SHAMPOO TOO, WEREN'T YOU?!?"

Akane: What sort of insane maniac do people think I am?

    [The question went unanswered.]

"What wrong with violent girl, Ranma?  She jealous cause Shampoo bring
no noodles for her?"
"Er..Akane...I can explain..." Ranma attempted to say as Akane doused
him and Shampoo with the bucket she was so conveniently forced to hold
by the teacher.

Flaw: This is getting a tad trite.

"HEY! YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO DO THAT, YOU KNOW!"
"MROWW!" Shampoo-Neko screached as she slashed at Akane and jumped into
Ranma's reluctant arms.
"Ulp..GET IT OFF!!"
"Meeooow" Shampoo-Neko purred delightedly as she clung and cuddled up
to Ranma's face.  Akane just leaned against the wall and smirked
contently as she watched Ranma flail and stumble about, screaming in
horror.

Akane: Oh come on!  I've been vicious sometimes, but I don't like doing THAT.  It's one thing to inflict pain and terror of your own, but using someone's fear to inflict pain and terror?  That's something completely different.

Back at the dojo, Ranma confronted Akane, after regaining his
masculinity.
"You know, you could've helped me.  You know how much I hate c-c-c-,
well, you know."
Akane clenched her hands to her bosom and gazed girlishly into Ranma's
eyes and said, "Why Ranma, are you admitting your need for help from a
mere woman??"

Shin: She's insane.

"NO! I'm just-"
"WHAT??  Are you saying that WOMAN AREN'T GOOD ENOUGH TO HELP YOU?!?"

Ryouga: [Ranma] HEY, AKANE, DO YOU THINK I'M THE ONE GOING DEAF?!  YOU HAVE TO ACCEPT THE FACT THAT _YOU_ ARE THE ONE THAT'S GOING DEAF!!

Akane: [Akane] WHAT?!

"No, that's not it at all..."
"I bet! I can't beleive you're such a sexist PIG!!!  You're not even
half the pig that P-Chan is.  At least he has heroic blood in him."
"How do you know that?  He's just a little runt...OUCH!"
"How dare you pick on a helpless little animal.

Nabiki: BY VENTRUE'S BALLS...er, rules!  I just realized, someone must have used Dementate on Akane!

All: [suddenly understanding] OOOOOOOOOOOHHHH!

 P-Chan is more human
than YOU are!  I have it on VERY GOOD authority that P-Chan's blood is
better than anyone else's around here!!"

Ukyou: And I'm considered the crazy one?  Akane, pot, kettle, puce. ^_^

"What are you saying Akane?  How could you know something like that?"
"Well...er..working at the blood drive has given me lots of information
on the- HEY, WHY SHOULD I TELL YOU, ANYWAYS?"
"Hey, relax Akane, I was only asking, and besides, you started it!"
"RANMA!! SOMETIMES I CAN'T BELEIVE YOU!" Akane screeched as she stormed
out of the room, leaving Ranma to wonder exactly what the hell just
happened.



Diablerie:Nerima
By: neB and P-R-P-Chan
Part 3

The next day was taken up with the surprise news of Kasumi's impending
demise, or that was what Soun made it out to be.  Actually she was just
suffering from a slight case of dehydration, so she said.
Ranma stumbled down the stairs to hear Soun's wailing voice.
"OH NO! My darling Kasumi's sick.  Somebody HELP MEEEE!
KAAASUUUMIIIIII!!!"

Shin: [Nabiki] Dad, no need to panic.  She just tried to take blood from an unwilling victim.

Ryouga: The way this is going, I wouldn't be at all surprised if she _was_ a Salubri.

Kodachi: No, no, no.  She was trying to drink from another Kindred.

Alexander: Somehow I don't think KASUMI would be an Assamite.

Kodachi: The way _this_ story is going?

    [The statement went without further challenge.]

"Dad," Nabiki said, "It's not like she's dead, or at least not
quite..."
"WHAT?!? My darling Kasumi is DYING??? Whatever shall I do??" Soun
whined on as unabashed tears flowed down his face, "Two already, I can't
stand to lose another!"

Nabiki: Daddy would have said that if I hadn't dominated him into NOT saying something that stupid.

"Daddy, you're babbling.  Mother died years ago, and no one else has
since died."
"Oh yes, that's what i meant to say...yes that's right."
Nabiki's forked toungue snaked it's way out of her mouth and touched
her lip in contemplation.

Nabiki: Does she have a self-control of 0?

Akane: She must be a Sabbat agent.  She just has to be.  Disgusting Setites.

Shin: Now, now, Akane-chan, Setites are recognized as actual members of the Camarilla, just like there are antitribu Lasombra and Tzimince.

Ranma entered and asked, "Hey, what the heck's going on??"
"SHUT UP RANMA, CAN'T YOU SEE MY POOR SISTER IS SICK AND ALL YOU'RE
THINKING OF IS YOURSELF...I CAN'T TAKE IT!!!"  Akane screamed as she hit
him repeatedly with the frying pan she was about to use to make
tox-...breakfast.

Shin: By the megamis, does _Akane_ have a self-control of 0?

Akane: She HAS to have a Willpower 0.  By the way, if I were a vampire, I wouldn't BOTHER COOKING.  And she hasn't a Self-Control of -10.

Flaw: Maybe you're testing a new Thaumaturgy or trying to blood bound him.  It's not entirely out of the question that you're trying to weaken him so you can have a valid reason to make him your childer.

"Uh-oh...Akane's cooking? Now we'll all be on the verge of death too!"
"KASUMI!!" Soun begain his wailing once more.
"Don't worry Father, she's not dying.." Akane assured Soun before
turning to Ranma, "LOOK WHAT YOU DID! WE FINALLY GET FATHER TO CALM DOWN
AND YOU GO AND GET HIM ALL WORRIED AGAIN!! YOU INCONSIDERATE JERK!"
"What did i do?" Ranma retorted, "You're so UNCUTE!"

Alexander: I have to ask - What the _HELL_ is up with calling her 'uncute' all the time?

Shin: Miss Takahashi-sensei didn't want Ranma to call Akane a 'total bitch' or else there would be no chance of the two falling in love.

"What did you SAY? I'll get you later Ranma, right now I need to cook
breakfast for *my* family," Akane said as she stalked off into the
kitchen.
"Ruin breakfast is more like it," Ranma muttered.
"I CAN'T BELEIVE YOU JUST SAID THAT! THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH MY
COOKING!!"  Akane yelled as she threw her rollling pin with a perfect
spiral right into the side of Ranma's head.

Nabiki: Nothing wrong?  Someone used dementate on her for sure.

Akane: Hey, I said I was sorry.  I _did_ finally kill that demon, didn't I?

    [For some reason, Flaw found her feet incredibly fascinating all of a sudden.]

Shin: Right after it managed to toxicify the lawn, damage the dojo and decay a lot of the stone walls.

Kodachi: I remember that thing.  If I hadn't used my prototype man-devouring plant, you wouldn't have killed it.

Ukyou: Yeah, but I want to know why it teleported Shin into that Sabbat meeting.

    [Flaw began to whistle innocently.]

A-kun's VO: Will you all just shut the hell up?

"Ahhhh...w-where..did t-that tr-truck c-come from-m?"
"You shame me boy!! how your father worked so hard to teach you the
important things in life, like food, sake, and most of all:
RESPONSIBILITY!!  Why do you always have to make me look so bad.  Have
you no respect for either myself or your future father-in-law?"

Shin: PFFFFT!  Even in my world, I may respected my father, but not as much as some of my other teachers.

"Lighten up, Pop.  After all you gotta wat Akane's cooking too you
know!"

Flaw: Wat?  What does that mean?

Alexander: Uh, unless it's hilarious, let's stop ragging on his misspellings.

Genma's silence showed his agreement.

Lunchtime once again approached Furinkan, and as if to echo that though
Ukyo once again approached Ranma with the thoughts of a 'lunch date' in
mind.

Ukyou: After what we enjoyed for thirty seconds?  I'm surprised I even remember! ^_^

Shin: [obviously hurt] HEY!  Even a lesser dimensional brother's performance will be memorable to say the least!

"So Ranchan, you want to join me for okonomiyaki again today?" Ukyo
asked, her eyes gleaming like a young child opening christmas presents.
"You're not keeping them in the closet again are you?"

All: What a loaded statement!

"Yeah, but you enjoyed it yesterday right?"
"Well yeah, but us sneaking off to the closet together... what are
people going to think?"

Kodachi: They'll think "Akane's a bitch!".

Akane: HEY!

Kodachi: The one in the story.

Akane: [grinning] I knew that, what I meant that's not mean enough!

"We are fiancees after all"
Ranma turned bright red as he stuttered a response, "Well I guess.. and
the only lunch I have today was made by Akane.. lucky I got rid of it
before it could hurt me."
Ukyo shuddered in sympathy, as she took him in hand, escorting him
towards the feast she'd laid out for him.

Ukyou: Betcha she isn't as clever as I was in catching Shin.

Shin: I still say that the puddle of oil wasn't really your idea.

Ukyou: It worked well enough.

Akane looked up to see Ukyo dragging Ranma off to parts unkown.  She
was about to follow but was stopped by a hand on her shoulder.  Akane
turned to see her sister smiling like a cat that just caught a bird.
"Give them a bit Akane-chan," Nabiki said," It'll feel so much better
to give him a pounding even HE knows he deserves."

Shin: DESERVES?!

Akane: We said it before and it's still true.

All: [in unison] WHAT A BITCH!

"Fine Nabiki, but you better be right."
"Sister, you should learn to be more respectful of you elders," Nabiki
hissed.  She poked Akane between the breasts to illustrate her point,
causing the youngest Tendo to nearly double over in agony.

Nabiki: I must have high potence.  Or Vicissitude.

"Of course you're right.. how could I ever doubt you," Akane winced as
she spoke, more in shame than in pain.

Alexander: No, I think more in shame of the planted response.

"Ranma I think it's time."
"Time for what, Ukyo?"
"Time for you to give yourself to m fully!"  Ukyo replied with a smile,
as she reached for his pants.
"Uh..Ukyo..I don't think this is a good idea!"  Ranma said, nervously
looking around the locked closet, trying to push her hands away.
"But Ranma, you weren'r complaining yesterday, and we were pretty
intimate," Ukyo said in a silky voice.  She grabbed a handful of his
pants, and yanked them down, just as Akane kicked the door open, with
Nabiki peering curiously over her shoulder.

Flaw: Breaking the Masquerade here?  Even the most corrupt or patient of sires wouldn't allow that.

Nabiki: Not to mention they're renegging on a deal.

"Oh my GOD!!" Akane yelled, blushing to the roots of her hair, unsure
whether to run and hide or clobber Ranma even more.

Akane: DAMMIT!  She didn't even think to join in!

Ukyou: The corruption is complete. ^_^

"Nice legs," Nabiki commented, noting a few little holes on Ranma's
inner thigh.  "Ranma, I think it's time you tell us where you're getting
the money to uphold an addiction of this kind!"
"What addiction??" Ranma asked, quickly pulling his pants up.
"Heroin, dolt!  What else do you shoot up?"

Shin: It's sad to see a dimensional brother turn into a drug addict.  If only he just didn't reach for so much right away, he could have avoided that flaw!

"Heroi-HEY!! I'm not on drugs Nabiki!"
"How do you know about heroin, Nabiki??" Akane asked, still with her
back to Ranma.

Nabiki: The question should be 'how do YOU know about heroin if you're wondering how I know about heroin?'.

"Er..nevermind. So Ranma, what're you doing in the closet with Ukyo?"
Nabiki asked with a giggle.
"Eating lunch," Ranma answered, twiddling his thumbs, and looking
everywhere but at Ukyo, who was trying to hide a smile.

Ukyou: Well, I was eating something...

Kodachi: Ukyou!

Ukyou: What?  It's just toothpaste.  Gotta keep my fangs nice and clean! ^_^

"Well, I can see that, but you're not going to get much protein that
way!" Nabiki said drily, "Although i'm sure *she* will!"
"HEY!!" Ukyo interrupted, "That's not fair! i'm only doing what a
proper fiancee would do!"

Ryouga: [to Shin] Proper fiancees bite each other on an arterie near the groin?

Shin: Don't ask.

    [Alexander and Ryouga wince and cross their legs.]

"HE's my FIANCEE YOU LITTLE TRAMP!" Akane screeched.
"Who you calling little, Butch?" Ukyo replied.
"WHY YOU-"
"Do i detect the voices of a faie maiden in distress?"  Kuno queried,
as he strode through the doorway. "P'raps I can be of some help to you."

Flaw: The way this story is going, _he's_ a Ventrue.

Shin: Really?  I would've figured him to be a Torrie, like Ko-chan.

Kuno took Akane's hane in his and kissed it gently, only to be smacked
upside the head with a rolling pin, Akane pulled out of Hammerspace.

All: ............

Nabiki: That made no sense.

Ukyou: Maybe it's a new discipline.

Flaw: You mean an undiscipline.  I don't know how having to pull oneself out of Hammerspace would be helpful.

Alexander: Could save you time on meat-tenderizing.

TharzZzDunN: She could be practicing her birth control method of 'pulling out'.

Ukyo's hand gestured in an upward movement, a movement that was quickly
followed by another.  Namely Akane falling to the ground.

All: ...............................

Kodachi: Okay, what Clan has Telekinesis again?

Shin: Maybe she was a Mage?

Akane: It's incompatible.  She'd need to learn Thaumaturgy...

Shin: Unless someone used a curse to turn her into a vampire-esque mage.  I mean, if she has all the weaknesses of a vampire on top of the weaknesses of a mage, it would certainly be difficult for her to manage.

Alexander: That might work.

Ukyou: Only if the storyteller is being an asshole. ^_^

"Who put that banana peel on the floor?" Akane yelled.
"What on earth are you talking about? What banana peel?" Nabiki calmly
asked.
"That banana peel!!" Akane said, pointing at the empty floor in front
of her.

Ukyou: It would seem that even my dimensional sister knows Demi-Reality. ^_^

"Where?" Ranma asked.
"SHUT UP RANMA! WHO ASKED YOU ANYWAYS?!?"
"How dare you slight Akane, Ranma? How can you be so cruel to her, when
she's being forced into marriage with you!"

TharzZzDunN: [Ranma] Hey, nobody ever asked if I wanted _my_ face peed on!

Ryouga said, as he emerged
from the ceiling.

Akane: Okay, how did he find his way there-oh, wait, it's Ryouga.

Ryouga: HEY!

Nabiki: Even you have to admit that your ability to get lost is astounding, Hibiki-san.

Shin: Yeah, next to Tsubasa's Vicissitude.

"Me save you Ranma, you come home with Shampoo, be safe!" Shampoo
annouced, bouncing through the wall, adding yet another missing wall to
the room.

Ukyou: Okay, I've lost track... how many of these people are vampires, ghouls or whatevers?

Shin: Hey, there's a possibility!  What if they're all GHOULS like me?  I can go out in sunlight.

Nabiki: Like I would lower myself into the place of a lowly ghoul, especially to bastards like the Setites?

Shin: They _are_ pretty smooth.

Alexander: After this next scene, can we have a break?

A-kun's VO: [tired] FINE!

"AAAARGGGHHHH!!!"  Ranma screamed, clutching his head as he ran from
the closet.

Akane: [teasingly] OH NO!  HE'S COMING OUT OF THE CLOSET!

    [Shin bops the Brujah, who just chortles.]

"Ranma, come back here!!" Ryoga yelled out, as he turned to chase Ranma
and slammed into one of the few remaining walls, knocking himself out
cold.

Flaw: I thought he had Fortitude 5.

Ryouga: Hey, I just botched a roll, okay?

"RANMA!" Ukyo, Kuno, and Shampoo yelled out simultaneously, albeit with
different tones, as they proceeded to chase after him.
Nabiki turned to Akane, who still hadn't risen from her position on the
floor. "Ta-ta, dear sister.  I'll see you at home!"

Flaw: [Akane] I've Fallen and I can't get up!

Alexander: She's a Brujah, not a Baali or a Tremere.

Flaw: HEY!

Ukyou: What if she were a Salubri? ^_^;

Kodachi: She doesn't have a third eye.

Ukyou: I meant the ghoul of a Salubri. ^_^

Nabiki: Can they even ghoul?

Shin: We know so little about them, who would know?

As Nabiki left, Akane slammed her fist into the floor in frustration.
She turned around looking for something to hit; then seeing only Ryoga,
she crawled quietly to his side.

Akane: HEY!  I wouldn't torture poor Ryouga just because I wanted to hit something!  Ranma's my favored punching bag, so I'd wait!  Not that I've ever been THAT prone to violence....

    [Crickets chirp as everyone else refuses to say anything.]

Ukyou: Break time! ^_^

    [The group stands and stretches, allowing the numb feelings flow out of their butts and into their legs.]

A-kun's VO: So, what do you think so far?

Nabiki: We'll hold our judgement until the end.

Shin: [at a computer that appeared in the room] Hey, I just found a great site for info on the Clans.

Ukyou: That's my Shin! ^_^

    [The group gathers around.]

Shin: Well, according to this, Nabiki should actually have her eyes permanently changed to those of a serpent's, though the type of serpent's eyes are up to the player and storyteller.  She might get away with it.

Ukyou: What about the tongue? ^_^

Shin: .... it doesn't say.  It just says that it can be used for aggravated damage or for drinking blood.

Nabiki: Some resource.

Shin: Well, the guy's busy.  There's also a page at: http://php.indiana.edu/~adashiel/wod/ where you can find all sorts of other clans, paths, disciplines and such for World of Darkness.

A-kun's VO: Are you all done?

Shin: Jerk.

    [The group reseats themselves.]

Ranma, having evaded the posse, returned to the broom closet at the
same time as Ukyo.
"I knew you'd be back here, just couldn't get enough.  Come on Ranma,
let's get back to where we left off!" She grabbed his hand, and pulled
him into the closet before he could argue.

Shin: [blushing] Well, it is difficult to resist something that incredible.

As they entered they saw Akane suddenly lift her face from Ryouga's,
her face flushed, with Ryoga moaning to himself.

Akane: I WAS DRINKING FROM HIS _FACE_?!

Ukyou: Pity, his nose'll never be the same. ^_^

"YOU BITCH!" Ukyo screamed out.

Ukyou: Huh?  Why would I say that?  I'd tell her that invalidated her claim on... [inquiring to Shin] I call him Ranchan, right? [Shin nodded] Ranchan.  Well, if I was as jealous and possessive. ^_^

Nabiki: Unless you have a claim on Ryouga.

Ryouga: EWWWW!  HER AND ME?!  Nabiki, that's downright revolting!

Shin: [angrily] Don't make me pound you, fur boy!

Ryouga: I meant us together, not her personally.  You all know I'm not into Malkavians.

Ukyou: Of course not, last time we saw, you were in a Toreador! ^_^

    [Ryouga shuts up while blushing fiercely.]

"You're s`uch a hypocrite, Akane! You get mad at me, then sneak off
with Ryoga when i'm not looking? With RYOGA OF ALL PEOPLE!"
"I don't have to explain myself to either of you.. ESPECIALLY YOU
RANMA!!" Akane yelled as she belted Ranma through the hole in the roof,
kindly provided by Ryoga's untimely arrival.

Shin: [as a Brujah Justicar] No, you just have to answer to me, bitch!

"That wasn't very nice, you lowlife, conniving, TWO-TIMING,
DOUBLE-CROSSING, WEASELY LITTLE BITCHWHORE!!!"

All: Bitchwhore?

Akane: Jeez, I would've been more impress if she had just call me a peckerhead.

Kodachi: Or a crossdresser.

Akane: Right, or a crossdresser.  A bitchwhore makes NO sense.

"That's my business, not yours, so BUTT OUT SPATULA SLUT!" Akane
growled, baring teeth.

All: SPATULA SLUT?!

Akane: Oh, come on!  I'd call her a goat-[CENSORED] or a [CENSORED] of [CENSORED][CENSORED].

"Ranma IS my business, and it's obvious who HE prefers!" Ukyo shouted,
returning the guesture.
Ryoga looked up, dumbfounded, from one face to the other, then promptly
fainted again.  When he woke up, he was lying in one of the school
clinic's cots, next to Ranma.  He tried to sit up but the nurse pushed
him back down.

Kodachi: I wonder if that's supposed to build up suspense.

Flaw: The keywords being 'supposed to'.

"You've had quite a time, young man.  All that brawling cause a lot of
blood loss.  By the way, were you aware that you're anemic?"

Nabiki: Jeez, I sap one idiot down to 2 blood points and people call him anemic.

Akane: Besides, they're supposed to test the blood to get that result.  Anemia doesn't just pop up.

"But I'm not an-"
"Never you mind, rest up here, then when you feel a little better, you
can go home."
Ranma got up and stuck his toungue out at Ryoga.  "Nyah-Nyah, you gotta
stay here!"

Ryouga: As if I could.

Shin: And why is he teasing Ryouga?  He should be more worried about the fact that both he and Ryouga are being treated like a keg for a number of vampires.

    [Everyone stares at Shin.]

Shin: Well, would you want to be the snack for a Setite?  Or whatever the hell Akane is?

All the vampires: ................

"That goes for you too, you sustained soem bad bruises yourself, and
you may have a concussion.  So lie down like a good boy!"  The nurse
said as she gently pushed Ranma back into his bed.

Ryouga: Damn and I didn't even get the chance to soak.

"What happened?" Ryoga asked as the nurse left the room.
"You don't wanna know!" Ranma replied, "Besides, you were knocked out
for three quarters of it anyways."
"Phew, that explains the weird hallucination at the end"

Ukyou: So, Ryouga, are you naturally stupid or was it a result of all that constant traveling? ^_^

Ryouga: Hey, it's not my fault I have a natural intelligence of 1.  I was trying to get my perception and wits so high that I forgot to pay attention to the other thing.  Whatever it's called.

"And that's all it was, Ryoga, a hallucination.  Even when Akane kissed
you!" Ranma stated, which prompted a thought, "Why does that phrase
sound familiar?"  But Ranma's train of thought derailed as Ryoga grasped
what he'd just said.
"Akane kissed me...WAIT A MINUTE! If it was a hallucination, how did
you know about it?"
"Oh, I guess that explains it.  Hey Ranma?"

Kodachi: I think someone missed a line of dialogue.

Alexander: Among other things.

Shin: No, I told you.  Humans are wily creatures.  We figure things out.

"Yeah Ryoga?"
"Do you think Akane's acting sorta strange lately?"
"Akane's always strange."
"HEY WATCH YOUR MOUTH!! I'm serious!" Ryoga shouted, rising halfway up
before collapsing back down again.
"So am I!"
"RANMA!! JUST ANSWER THE STUPID QUESTION ALREADY!"
"I JUST DID!"

Ukyou: Looks like another pointless fight. -_-;  Oh well. ^_^

The nurse returned to find the two boys weakly swinging at each other,
so she sent them home, each in a different direction; which probably
would have happened anyways, seeing as Ryoga was one of the pair.

Nabiki: BRILLIANT!  Ranma must have a pay-as-you-go plan.

Shin: Pay as you go?

Nabiki: If you can't pay for it, you go.

Late that night, a shadowy figure snuck into the Tendo Dojo.  What made
the figure so different than most shadowy figures who snuck into the
Tendo Dojo (admit it there have been a lot), was that this one wasn't a
person using the dark to camouflage their entrance, rather the figure
seemed to be a part of the night, having an inky black form that gave
the impression that light flowed around it; that and the fact that it
made absolutely no noise.

Shin: SHIT!  An Assamite!

    [The group thought about that state, then burst out laughing.]

Akane: Well, using camouflage would mean they aren't adept at Obfuscate or they just didn't learn it.  Assuming it's the former, we can rule out a lot of clans.

 Without a sound, the figure crept up the
stairs and down the hall.

Ranma woke suddenly, sensing that he wasn't alone (nevermind the
sleeping Panda, Genma doesn't really count as a person, now does he?) he
scanned the room.  He was surprised to find Ukyo crawling into his bed.
"I can't stand another day alone! I need you Ranma! I need to be with
you!"
Ranma's reply was cut off as Ukyo filled his mouth with her probing
toungue.
Genma snored on.

All: AH!!

Alexander: No lemon scene?  This sucks!

Nabiki: Can we refrain from puns?

Kodachi: After Shin's little statement, I kind of doubt it'll be possible.

Diablerie:Nerima
by: neB and P-R-P-Chan
CHAPTER FOUR

Shin: I'm still waiting for the Diablerie part.

Flaw: Watch the Salubri.

Shin: Don't you mean the Tremere?

    [Flaw glares at the Malkavian Ghoul, only to get a glare right back from the rest of group.]

The next morning, the entire household woke up to Soun's screams.

Akane: THERE'S NO TOILET PAPER!  NABIKI!  HOW COULD YOU FORGET?!

Nabiki: Akane, please!

Akane: [grinning] I still remember that.  You forgot six times in a row.  Dad was furious.

"KASUMIIII!! WHERE DID YOU GO??? WHO COULD"VE KIDNAPPED MY DEAR
KASUMI?!?"
"Daddy, what are you going on about?" Nabiki asked, rolling her eyes.

Ryouga: [Nabiki] She's just Obfuscated.

Akane raced out of her room, and into Kasumi's, "Father, what's
wrong??"

Kodachi: Father, what could possibly be troubling you, you magnificently stupid bastard?

Akane: I think you got our fathers mixed up.

Kodachi: At least I didn't try and cover it up by making up a bullshit story involving Vicissitude.

A-kun's VO: I should warn you that there are charges in the roof and it's currently noon.

All: WHAT?!

A-kun's VO: Juuuuust shittin' ya.

Soun turned to face his daughters, tears streaming down his face, "I
couldn't find Kasumi, so I came into her room to see if she was allright
and all I found was this pile of ashes on her bed andIdontknowwhattodomy
lifeisoverwhatwilltheneighboursthinkImsoALOOONE!!!"

Shin: I'd be more worried about the fact that Akane will have to cook or Nabiki will have to order take out.

Nabiki: I shudder at both concepts.

Ukyou: Natch! ^_^

"Oh dear," Nabiki said, pinching her lower lip in thought.
"Oh NO!!" Akane said, holding her head in her hands.
After the two girls had given their father a nice little tranq,

Ryouga: [staring at Nabiki and Akane] YOU SHOT HIM?!

Shin: [Akane] Relax, it's just a tranq gun, it's not like he's-[suddenly, Soun's neck starts spurting blood like a fountain] WHOOPS!

Alexander: Maybe they misspelled 'hit off a bong'.

they
were carrying him to bed and discussing the situation.
"You know what this means, Akane dear, someone else is trying to move
into our territory!"

Kodachi: [Akane with wide-eyed innocence] Gee, do you think? [Akane the Brujah] OF COURSE, SOMEONE'S MOVING INTO OUR TERRITORY, YOU DIPSHIT!

"How can you be so cold and calculating! Someone just killed our sister
and that's all you have to say??"
"Don't be so naive, little sister, this isn't exactly the first time we
had to deal with this kind of situation!" They deposited Soun into his
bed.  "Besides, she'll be back."
They heard giggling behind them, then turned and saw a shimmering
Kasumi rise up through the floor.  "Oh Nabiki, you're just so smart!!
How did you know I'd be back as a spirit??"

All: [O_O] SAY WHAT?!

Ryouga: Oh, there's no f*cking way, _KASUMI TENDO_ would have the ability Embody mastered that fast!

Shin: Not to mention the fact that they'll have to protect her from the Hiearchy, the Giovanni, Spectres, Malfaens, other Wraiths, and her own SHADOW.

Kodachi: And then there's the fact that she lives in the Shadowlands, a twisted variant of our own world.

Shin: [to the readers] See, kids?  You need to take with wraiths a lot in order to figure out the afterlife.  Well, plus I stole A-kun's Wraith: The Oblivion manual last week.

A-kun's VO: YOU BITCH!  I've been looking for that!

Shin: I'll give it back.

"Lucky guess??" Nabiki said, with a smile and giggle, quietly motioning
towards Akane.

Akane: ..........  I'm a Wraith now?

Shin: So, are you a-

Akane: Shut it, Shin!

"Oh...oops..." Kasumi murmured.  "Don't worry about father, one good
spirit deserves another!!"

Nabiki: Please don't tell me daddy's a Wraith too.  That'll be SO lame.

"Wha...?" The two remaining sisters said to each other in shock.
"Just a figure of speech! I'll take care of him, he needs to rest in
peace! Now you two go and play!" Her hands reached through Akane and
Nabiki.  She furrowed her brow in concentration and her hands became
material, then she lifted the two girls and escorted them out the door.
"That's better, now don't be late for dinner."

Shin: Like either of them care about eating.... unless they're ghouls like we theorized.

Kasumi was in the process of cleaning the kitchen for the fourth time.
She'd already cleaned the rest of the house three times that morning, so
decided that she should try it again, just to beat her record.
The door swung open and Happosai's voice rang out, "Hey baby, I'm
home!" He floated through the door, "I just heard you'd died and was
sooo upset. C'mere and give grampa a hug!"
Happosai leaped forward, arms reaching for Kasumi's breasts, only to
pass right through her and into the wall.

All: [O_O] THE FREAK'S A WRAITH TOO?!

Kodachi: Wait, no.  He passed through her and HIT the wall.

Alexander: Dammit!  I almost went into Torpor!

"But Master Happosai, I'm not really dead..."

Shin: That's what he was worried about.  Seeing you again made him think you were alive again.

Happosai's face blanched, "Y-you're not??"
"Well, no." Kasumi said with a smile.
'Damn,' Happosai thought, "Just when I thought it was safe to return
home!'
"I'm actually a spirit now! Isn't that just wonderful? I can do
everything that I could before, but now I can also be a ghost!

Ryouga: Oh yeah, sign that Pact of Doom, Kasumi, it won't hurt...

Flaw: Until your Director Shadow pulls you into a Harrowing and sends you screaming into Oblivion.

That's
why you couldn't do that naughty thing that you were about to do!"

Alexander: But if you just used Embody, he WOULD touch you...

Shin: Unless she's... shit, he knows nothing of the Wraith rules!

"Phew! That's great!! I mean, that's too bad, Kasumi, but listen...now
that you're a spirit, do you need your underwear?? I'm willing to pay a
reasonable price!"

Ukyou: He's never paid before.  Losing Kasumi made him lose some screws. ;;^_^;;

In a darkened hall, a meeting between kindred spirits was taking place.

All: .......................

Around a  large oaken table, seated in high backed chairs, the ones who
ruled the city plotted their strategy.
"One of our enemies has fallen... now would be the perfect time to
cleanse the stain from our fair city, it's time for us to move against
those who break our laws.  We must strike now,"  The shadowy figure at
the head of the table started.

Shin: So the Sabbat have rules now?

Nabiki: Unless we were with the Sabbat...

Shin: Can't be, none of you were brainwashed or blood-bound.

"Are you sure this is the best time?" A voice to his right asked.
"Of course it is you blithering idiot! They've just lost one of their
most feared members..

Ukyou: Ah, yes, Kasumi Tendo, Mistress of Destruction. ^_^

If nothing else we must strike while we still
can..  Before that cutthroat skinflint manages to take control of the
situation."

Akane: Why didn't they just strike all at once?

Nabiki: We must have been out and about.

"Yes O honourable one, I'm sorry that I doubted you." The second voice
answered timidly.
Another voice a bit farther down spoke up, "We also are missing one of
our number, the wanderer hasn't returned.  Last our sources heard she
was entering the premises of one..."
"Don't you dare start spreading rumors about my dearest love of loves!"
a feminine voice interjected.

Kodachi: I'm with the lowly Sabbat?  That makes no sense...

Ryouga: Maybe you got lucky and you're a Tzimince.  At least they have come nifty skills.

"We will give our companion the benefit of the doubt.  In two hours
time, whether or not she returns we strike then.  While we wait, I
believe refreshments are in order.  Sasuke! Bring in some drinks for our
guests!"

Alexander: So Tatewaki is with them?

    [Everyone shrugs.]

Ukyou: Hey, what if they're using the crappy Kindred The Embraced rules?  If I recall, so long as they drank plenty of blood, they could resist sunlight. ^_^

Nabiki: It still makes no sense.

The door slammed open.
"WHY YOU LITTLE HUSSY!!! GET OUTTA MY HOUSE!!"
Ranma woke with a shudder.  Ukyo almost cringed.  Genma snored on.
"Akane! Haven't you ever heard of the word 'knock'?" Ukyo said, glaring
at Akane with a look that would make an evil spirit cringe.

Ukyou: I don't understand... why doesn't my dimensional sister just use her Demi-Reality skeelz? ^_^

Shin: Maybe she's only got Demi-Reality 1 and she's a 13th gen.

Ukyou: Yeah, it does take two blood points at that low level.... ^_^

"Akane! You can't just come barging in here like that! That's so
rude!!" Ranma stated, as he hastily tried to cover his semi-nude body
with the sheets.  Ukyo, on the other hand, lost her grip on the sheet,
revealing alot more then she intended to.  As well as her own body,
which caused Ranma to blush subconsciously, she revealed half of Ranma's
abdomen, which was covered in welts, bites and claw marks.

Ukyou: [O_O] I'M A LUPINE?!  Oh dear... ^_^

Akane took an unsteady step back as her eyes took this all in.  Her
embarrassment turned to anger, however, as she screamed out, "I CAN'T
BELIEVE IT!! OUR SISTER DIES AND ALL YOU CAN DO IS LIE HERE ENGAGED IN
YOUR KINKY INCESTUOUS AFFAIR WHILE WE"RE CRYING OUR HEARTS OUT!!"

Kodachi: Incestuous?  Ranma and Ukyou are brother and sister?

Flaw: Who knew?

Alexander: I sure as f*ck didn't.

"Whose crying, Akane?" Nabiki asked as she walked in with an amused
look on her face.  "Oh, nice buns, Ukyo." She said with a smile and a
wink.
"Did someone mention buns," Genma said, rousing from his slumber, "I am
kinda hungry...um...why are there three women in here...RANMA M'BOY YOU
MAKE YOUR FATHER PROUD!!!" He gave Ranma a vicious bear hug, as tears
rolled down his face.  "And three at one time?? YOU'RE NO LONGER A BOY,
BUT A MAN!!!"

Shin: A-a-a-annoooo... I think P-R-P-Chan got Pops and mom mixed up....

Akane: That or he was thinking he'd get three times the food.

Shin: That might do it.

Akane's face deepened into scarlet as Genma rambled on about his
youthful carnal exploits.  Nabiki, on the other hand, began to gain
interest as he described some bitches he used to hang out with.

Shin: ...............................  WHAT?!?!  Dad was into bestiality?!  And here I thought you had to be Gangrel or Lupine... ^_^

Ryouga: GRRRRRRRRRR!

Shin: Just kidding, Ryouga, sheesh!

"ENOUGH," Akane screamed, "YOU CAN ALL GET OUT NOOOOW!"
"Whatsa matter, butch, jealous of something you'll never experience??"
Ukyo said, her eyes twinkling.
"Take a pill, Akane!" Nabiki said, then muttered, " I'm sure Ukyo did."

Ukyou: [as herself] It was blue with pink dots!

"RANMAAAA!" Soun wailed as he entered the fray.  "THIS IS YOU'RE
DOING!! You let that little TROLLOP in here, and now she's goneandkilled
mydarlingKasumialthoughshereallywantedtokillAkanebuthitthewrongdaughter
inafitofviolentrageandjealousyandnowKasumi'sconsignedtobeingaspiritfor
therestofeternityjustlikem-"

Akane: ....... even I wouldn't make THAT connection.

Ukyou: Yeah, why would _I_ kill Kasumi?  Seducing her is more fun. ^_^

"WHAAAT?" Dr. Tofu screeched from downstairs.  "WHAT HAPPENED??"  A
pause.  "WHO DID THIS TO YOU...I'LL KILL THEM!!"  Dr. Tofu's scream of
unprecedented rage echoed throughout the house, ending up reverbrating
in the room where Soun was still in the process of trying to figure out
exactly what was happening between Ranma and his accompanying harem.

All: Harem?

Dr. Tofu stormed up the stairs, as Soun finally realized that Ukyo was
trying to hide the fact that she was next to Ranma.  Ukyo was also
trying to hide the fact that she was naked, which didn't help the
situation much, either.
"RAAAANMAAAA!!! How could you betray my daughter like that!! She
trusted you, and you turned around and STABBED HER IN THE BAAAACK!!!"

Kodachi: I thought _I_ was the one with the backstabbing schtick... KUONJI!  How dare you steal my schtick!

Soun finished ranting just at the moment of Dr. Tofu's entrance.
"ranma you bastard i'll kill you for what you've done" Tofu's voice was
cold, calculating and unpunctuated.  "i, ono tofu will not stop until i
avenge my darling sweet innocent kasumi who never laid a finger on any
creature in this universe no matter how LOATHSOME,  no matter how EVIL,
no matter how much like YOU, RANMA!!! I'M GONNA KILL YOUUUUU!!!"

Nabiki: Tch, tch, tch, what a bad idea.

With that final, but very poorly written, commentary, Tofu pulled a
sharpened pencil from his pocket protecter

Alexander: If I recall, Tofu may have been a tad odd, but he was far from a total geek.

and stabbed it into Ranma's
heart.  Ranma squealed in pain

Ryouga: Funny, I thought I was the one who usually got the porcine curse.

as his flesh was pierced and collapsed
into a convulsing, and heavily bleeding heap.
"Oops..." Tofu stated, returning to a saner frame of mind, "I didn't
really do that, did I. I guess I just-"
"Don't just stand there you NITWIT!! SAVE HIM!" Akane sobbed.

Kodachi: Oh yes, you know, damage to the heart is _so_ easily fixed.

Shin: If they pull it out and Ranma spends a blood point, it's easy-squeazy.

Ukyo reacted faster, almost inhumanly faster.  She leapt up, grabbed
Ranma, and leapt out of the window.  As everyone in the room, except
Genma, raced towards the shattered window frame to see what was
happening, they saw no trace of either Ranma or Ukyo.

Ukyou: HAHA!  Eat my Celeritied dust! ^_^

Kodachi: You don't have Celerity.

Ukyou: But I have Demi-Reality.

Kodachi: Touche`.

"Now about those buns..." Genma said, stifling a yawn.



Dibalerie:Nerima
by: neB and P-R-P-Chan
chapter five

Ranma pushed Ukyo away.  "I just don't understand..."
"What's there to understand, Ranma? You're just lucky that the pencil
missed your heart, or else you would have died!"

Flaw: Ah!  Ranma must have cast Deflection of Wooden Doom.

"Wow...I never knew that you knew so much about anatomy, Ukyo, although
I should've guessed..."
"Ranma, you just have to learn to deal with your brush with death.
Alot of people deal with stressful situations daily, and this isn't
something that many people don't have to cope with in their lives!"

Ryouga: Actually, every day he's near Akane is a brush with death.  [to Akane] This story's Akane, not you, Akane.

"I...just need some time to think by myself."
"But Ranma, we have so much to learn and discover together...I have so
much to teach you."

Ukyou: Like how to be a good little Childe.  ^_^

"I promise to return, I just need a little while to myself, to reflect
on life. And death."  With that, Ranma turned and walked off...the roof,
leaving Ukyo to worry about him.  Without calling out to him, Ukyo
brushed a tear from her reddened eyes, and stalked off in the opposite
direction.

Alexander: Looks like Ukyou's going to bite off more than she can chew.

Ukyou: Crap.  Another one of me lost.  Dammit, can I cut a break once in a while?  If it's not torturing me like a low Willpower Wraith with an Abuser Shadow, I'm treated like I'm using Obfuscate 10.

The doorbell rang.  Kasumi swore to herself (although she'd never admit
it if you asked her) and put down her duster.  She'd only had a chance
to clean the kitchen six times today, so this interruption was very
annoying.

Nabiki: Not that she would've taken up any of those chances, ne?

Shin: Poor, poor Kasumi.  Of all the luck, getting a Leach for a Shadow.

 She put on a smile, however, just in case it was that
charming Dr. Tofu with another box of chocolates.  Of course she
couldn't actually eat them, but the gesture was nice, even from a
dimwitted...now, now, that's not nice...I don't know what's come over me
lately... I'm gonna kill whoever disturbed me, I'm gonna rip his ba-
whoa, girl... I feel dizzy...

All: [O_O] OH MY!

Shin: I was WAAAY wrong.  Monster Shadow.

Nabiki: And I'll bet it has the Shadow Arcanos Outrage 5.

Nonetheless, Kasumi rushed to the door,and swung it open with such
viciousness that it took the porr men behind it by surprise.
"Oh dear...I'm sorry about that."  Liar!  "May I help you??"  Go away!!
"We seek the villainous Nabiki Tendo and her horde! She has kidnapped
the poor, innocent Akane, and Akane must BE AVENGED!" The shadowy
figure, dressed in white, said.  The sunlight glowed brightly from
behind his back.

Akane: Ah, f*ck, a goddamn priest.

Shin: No, Tatewaki under Dominate, but with a Faith of 10.

"Yes!! Yes! Kill! Maim! DESTROY...er...she's not in right now...would
you like some tea and biscuits while you wait?"

Flaw: And she always did have low willpower...

"I believe she is hiding something!" Another shadowy figure, clad in
black and roller skates engraved with arcane symbols, said in a
distrustful tone of voice.
"Mmm...what a pretty door! Elyse!! Come to mommy!" The sole female
companion said, her eyes swirling, her voice commanding, her hands
clenched excitedly at the hem of her black, silken frilly  dress and her
chic Armani rollerblades.

All: [queasy] AZUSA?!

Alexander: Then that means the first guy was most likely...

Ryouga: [seething] Mikado.

The final companion couldn't speak, partly due to his black leather
mask being currently zipped shut, partly due to the lack of oxygen to
his brain, partly due to the lack of brain to his oxygen.  His shoulders
rose as he grumbled loudly, trying to sound menacing, his hands rose, a
wooden nail and mallet clenched tightly between his fingers...the
grumble was to much for him, however, and he lost his breath, balance
and dignity all at the same time, as he stumbled forward and promptly
fainted on the Tendo doorstep.

Kodachi: And we know where Gosunkugi is.

Shin: [angrily] That bitch. [pausing] Hey, I thought Gosunkugi was a girl.

Nabiki: In our world, yes.  Here, no.

"Is he allright?" Kasumi asked, looking down at the body now resting in
her feet, "Or do I have to KILL HIM MYSELF?!? The little moron is in my
FEET!!!"
"The white clad leader took a step back at this ferocity, raising his
wooden sword in self defence.  "You have won this round, but not the
war!! I shall be back to collect the prisoner later!"
"Hey sis, who's at the door?" Nabiki asked, sauntering down the stairs.

Alexander: [Kasumi's Shadow] Oh, just some victims.

Nabiki: That's nice.

Kun-...I mean the white clad leader whipped around in surprise and
stepped forward again, "Foul temptress, bring back my precious Akane
from the Abyss that you have sent her too, or I shal-"

Ryouga: [Kunou] -DANCE!

All: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

"Um, who's at the door?" Akane said, as she stepped through the kitchen
door.
The white clad Kun-...I mean leader's jaw dropped.  He turn and
prepared to flee this madness before hismindwentwithitohmygodwhat'sgoing
onAkanecan'tbeapartofallofthisGETAHOLD OF YOURSELF MAN!

Ukyou: You know, Ireallywishthisguywouldremembertousethespacekeymoreoftenbecausetryingto decipherallthewordswhenthey'renothingmorethanaconvultedblobisn'tvery EASY TO DO! ^_^

Akane: And how dare he think I'm dead!

 He took a deep
breath, then rolled his eyes in the first understanding that he ever had
of irony as Happosai hopped gaily up the sidewalk.  He saw Kun-...fuck
it you know who he is,

Shin: Then why did you cut his name off?

and lunged forward.  Happosai's fist went
directly towards Kuno's face...and missed??  Okay, it was batted away
with some ungodly inhuman speed that Kuno summoned up from somewhere.

A-kun's VO: [from somewhere] I deny that I rigged this fight.  And also, Happosai isn't a lech.

He somehow managed to kind of get his sword up to knock away Happosai's
fist really quickly in a somewhat coincidental manner...it was almost as
if he did it on purpose...naah, that's not possible.  Happosai's fist
was almost unscathed, except for the teensy-weensy little splinter that
pierced his flesh right between the knuckles

Ukyou: SONOVABITCH!

Ryouga: How did Kuno get so fast?

Shin: [deadpanned] The fight isn't rigged in any form, way or manner.

(Don't you hate it when
that happens?  Hurts like a bitch, and itches uncontrollably and you
can't reach it and...um...back to the story).

All: ...........

Happosai ripped the splinter out of his hand, the wound starting to
bleed.  Staring in shock, Happosai yelped in surprise, then turned to
the assembled Tendo sisters, looking for sympathy.

Alexander: That's all it takes to get rid of the old lecher?  Impossible!  I staked the bastard full through the chest!

Shin: It's not the position, but the lack of quantity.  It's a special curse that protects him from stakes, but does triple damage for splinters.

"IT HURTS!!!!! WHATEVER DID I DO TO DESERVE THIS?!?? ... MAKE IT
BETTER!!!" he whined, shoving his hand through Kasumi's face and into
Akane's.
"Get that outa my face you old pervert," Akane slapped his arm away
from her, towards Nabiki's face.  A bleeding wound in front of her eyes,
Nabiki's toungue snaked it's way out of her mouth to lap up a small
drop, Happosai was about to say something, but it was lost to the group
as Akane punted him off into the distance.

Nabiki: [sighing] I expect more from my dimensional sister and I'm punished for it.

Ranma walked the streets, confused, and yes, even a bit frightened.  He
no longer knew what was happening to him, or anyone else.  Everybody was
acting so strange all of a sudden, Akane acting all secretive, Nabiki...
well being Nabiki, even that episode with Kasumi.... Not to mention Dr.
Tofu.  Ranma shook his head.  He'd been stabbed in the heart.. rubbing
his hand over his chest, finding no wound, not even a scab..

Flaw: He never listens, does he?

Akane: Unless Ukyou's a Gangrel.  Then she'd have to watch him from a distance and never interfere.

Ukyou: That would royally suck butt.  Like Flaw here. ^_^

Flaw: I TOLD YOU THAT WAS ONE TIME ONLY AND IT WAS ON A DARE!

Ranma once
again shook his head in disbelief.  Finally taking his mind off his
problems for a moment he looked where he was going.. in time to notice
the alley he'd just turned into, the one filled with cats...

Nabiki: [Ranma] DUUURRR!  I'll go the alley with the cats that I'm afraid of.

Alexander: The Nekoken with a vampire's powers?

Shin: That's the stuff nightmares and Spectres are made of.

Turning to flee, Ranma found his exit blocked by even more of the
animals.  As they closed in on him, the first moving to rub against his
leg, Ranma turned away from his horror and let the darkness reign.

P-chan wandered aimlessly, searching for the one who ruled his heart
and soul.

Flaw: That would be the Giovanni who blood bound him.

Ryouga: Or the Ravnos who snuck up on him last night.

 As he passed the Nekohanten for the 20th time, he couldn't
dismiss thought from his mind, that the alley cat leading a parade of
other strays, looked startlingly familiar.  In fact he seemed to look
almost human...almost like...naaah couldn't be...

Ryouga: Ranma's gone Horrid Form!

P-chan's thoughts were interrupted as he was grabbed from behind, being
held up by his bandanna.
"Where is HE?" his captor asked,

Nabiki: Well, 'Him' is a PowerPuff Vilian, so you'd first have to go into that dimension...

Akane: P-chan Captor Mousse!

Shin: Akane, please...  A-kun might actually write that.

"That fiend hits on my Shampoo and
then vanishes without a trace."

Alexander: Hmmm, it must've been Mikado, which would probably make him a Nosferatu.

Kodachi: Alexander, it's Mousse.  Without his glasses on, EVERYONE vanishes without a trace.

Shin: But Nosferatu don't use Presence.

Mousse turned the piglet around to face him, "I'll kill that coward
Saotome.. just tell me where he is, Porker!"

Ukyou: Uh-oh, Ryouga, looks like someone knows your real side.

Ryouga: I told you, that Toreador Archon was abusing her power!

'Well at least he's got the right idea,' P-chan thought, 'but no one
treats Ryouga Hibiki like common swine.'
With a squeal of displeasure, P-chan buried his fangs into Mousse's
neck, causing the half-blind martial artist to drop him to the ground.

Flaw: I see Shampoo's been dominating him pretty well.  Bite on the neck, collapse.

Akane: I want to know how Ryouga managed to reach that far.

P-chan landed on his head, dazing him somewhat, but not putting him down
fro the count.  As Mousse screamed in pain and something else entirely
different, P-chan ran for his life, once again losing himself to his
wandering nature.

--
       P-R-P-Chan
       P-R-P-Chan's Pathetic Little Place
       http://www.geocities.com/Tokyo/Ginza/6291/
       The Ranma 1/2 Fanfic Library
       http://piros.ml.org/p-r-p-chan/
From: P-R-P-Chan <prpchan@colba.net>


    Dibalerie:Nerima
    by: neB and P-R-P-Chan
    chapter six

    Ukyo stumbled down the street, engrossed in her thoughts. She finally had Ranma, but at what cost?  He was hers no doubt about it,  but unfortunately, it wasn't on her terms; drastic measures for drastic times.  Akane had been steeling herself to act, so for Ukyo it was a now or never situation.  There was still the problem of Ranma's girl side.

Ryouga: Yeah, like the fact that the curse would revive him back into a living human so long as he remained in cursed form.

How she would react to recent events remained to be seen.
    Ukyo was startled out of her thoughts by a yowl from a side street.  Glancing down the alley, she saw a feline horde.  Most stayed back, frightened. The leader, a midnight black tom, strutted forward, letting loose another yowl, as he advanced on Ukyo.

Akane: How did he use Protean 4?  He's a fresh vampire!

    Ukyo settled into a crouch, holding out her hand towards the cat, her eyes lighting up with anticipation.  The cat moved forward, making a sound caught somewhere between a hiss and a purr, as if he couldn't decide to be happy or angry. Then, making his decision, rubbed his cheek against the back of Ukyo's outstreched hand.

Ukyou: Could this be a rare Ranma and Ukyou get together fanfic?  I hope not! ^_^

Shin: Why's that?

Ukyou: 'Cause you're better in bed!

    Ukyo smiled, petting the cat, all the way down his back. When she reached his tail she slid her hand over it, and his demeanor changed.

Flaw: I hope that the storyteller was informed.

Yowling in pain, the cat bit down on Ukyo's knuckle, reaching the bone.  Grimacing, she put her hand to her lips, trying to stem the flow of blood.  Glaring down at the cat, Ukyo nearly swatted him with her free hand, but stopped herself.  Stooping down, she gathered him into her arms,  removing the small priece of string tied to his tail, the source of his pain.  Cuddling him to her chest, Ukyo continued her journey home.

All: [genuinely touched] Awwwww.....

    Nabiki looked around, and seeing no one, slid the door to Happosai's room open a crack.  Peeking in, Nabiki found him  lying atop a pile of woman's undergarments, snoring loudly.  Her eyes gleaming, Nabiki crept into the room, leaving the door ajar, and descended upon the sleeping lecher, taking great pains not to drop the package under her arm.

Kodachi: [Nabiki] Heh, heh, heeehh... next stop for Happosai, Siberia!

    He was definitely dead. Kuno spat, then turned his head away. 'Oh well," Kuno thought to himself as they pushed the body back into the chamber, 'He was a loyal servant for many years...at least we shall be able to give him a nice funeral.'

Nabiki: [Tatewaki] OOOH!  SASUKE!  MY POOR, INNOCENT SPINELESS TWIN!  HOW WILL I-hey, Baywatch, cool...

    Kuno slammed his fist against the wall as he walked through the doors leading from the Nerima morgue.     "There, there dear brother, I'm sure it was all for the best!"
    "As usual, sister, your words match the darkness locked within your heart..." A single tear rolled down Kuno's cheek. Kodachi laughed a shrill laugh and threw her glossy hair back.
    "Who was it, sister, tell me. Was it that Tendo bitch?? Was it that  wandering tramp?? Or perhaps the Amazon wench charlatan and her whelp of a granddaughter!"

Kodachi: And when did I start talking like a Brujah?!!!

    ""You'd looooove to know, wouldn't you, brother dear. My boss wouldn't let me tell you even if I wanted to...which of course, I don't."
    "SASUKEEEEEEE!!!!" Kuno held his head in his hands, "i...will...get...my...revenge...I WILL AVENGE YOU MY DEAR SERVANT SASUKE!!!!"

Shin: Tatewaki was fine and dandy five minutes ago.  I think he's caught whatever makes Mister Tendo cry at the drop of a hat.

    "Perhaps a play for power, dear brother, or a vile threat. Maybe just someone trying to irritate your precious demeanor...or perhaps someone who knew Sasuke for the worthless peasant he was and was jealous of his treatment."

Akane: Worthless?  He was the only retainer anyone ever saw!

    "You think you're funny now, dear sister, but just remember that I run this city and unless you want to be sent back to that place my father conceived you, I suggest you think of who will be the one to inherit his fortunes!"

All: .............................

Ukyou: That would make Principal Kunou of the Order of Hermes... and Kodachi some creation of his...  And _TATEWAKI_ is the _PRINCE_?! O_o

Shin: Or a wannabe Ventrue.

    Nabiki stood up a little uneasily, swaying slightly, she stumbled to the door, a satisfied look on her face.  Wrenching the door open, Nabiki lost her balance, falling to the floor, taking Happosai's door with her.

Nabiki: BLAAAAAAAAARRRRGG!  That's what I get for drinking from HIM!

Hearing the noise, Kasumi rushed in, running over Happosai, covered as he was with lipstick marks and scratches, a footprint didn't make much difference.  Coming to her little sister's side, Kasumi was surprised when Nabiki tried to headbutt her.  She was even more surprised as Nabiki tripped over an empty sake bottle, fell through her and landed with a crunch on the floor behind her.

Kodachi: [as Ruri Hoshino] Baka.

    "Are you okay??" Kasumi asked.
    Nabiki slowly rose to her knees, weaving slightly. She had shards of glass and clay all over the front of her blouse, and her clothes were stained with blood.
    "Nabiki!!

Ryouga: [Kasumi] Nabiki, you've got a drinking problem!  You don't seem capable of putting more than 30% in your mouth!

Akane: Maybe she's a Setite-Salubri mix!

All: [considering that idea] Eeeeewwwww....

You're bleeding pretty badly!  Perhaps you should lie down." Kasumi said, wishing she were still able to help Nabiki clean the wounds in a more substantial manner.

Flaw: ....... does Kasumi usually have thoughts like that?

Nabiki: Hey, I just dominate, I don't read minds.

    Nabiki appeared confused for a moment. She shook her head to try and clear it, then looked down at herself. Her eyes widened.
    "NOOOOOO...blood...dammit!!"

Akane: [as a soused Nabiki] AAAAAADRIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!

    "I know you're upset, it's probably shock from blood loss...Nabiki, have you been drinking?? Oh. NABIKI!!! You know that you have a low alcohol tolerance! Remember the Prozac incident!!"

Shin: Actually, I thought vampires had no tolerance for foreign floods other than blood.

Nabiki: [considering that statement] You know, I've never tried to drink anything but blood since I became a vampire.

    "No, you don't understand...blood...spilt...bleeding...ruined!" It was all so garbled. Nabiki just couldn't clear her head enough to explain.

Ryouga: [Nabiki] Panties... chihuahua.... Dr. Slump comic.... panties... ruined.... PANTIES!

    "OH! I get it! You're worried about your blouse being ruined!! Well no need to worry, I'm sure I can get the stains out! Here,"     She took Nabiki by the arm and led her to her room. Nabiki, weaving and stumbling the whole way, fell into bed, as Kasumi bandaged her and washed the blood from her. Kasumi said goodnight and took the stained clothes to be washed.

Kodachi: You know, if any of you die and become Wraiths, you'll probably have the Parent Shadow.

Shin: Like that'll slow me down any.

-end chapter 6



    P-R-P-Chan
    "Nihao Ranma! Shampoo come sit on face?"

    The Ranma !/2 Fanfiction Archive
    http://www.crosswinds.net/japan/~prpchan/index.htm
    P-R-P-Chan's Pathetic Little Place
    http://www.crosswinds.net/japan/~prpchan/little/index.htm

A-kun's VO: It's over.

Nabiki: Great.

A-kun's VO: Comments?

Flaw: In a moment.

    [The group quietly discusses the fanfic before Nabiki stands.]

Nabiki: We, the reviewers, have passed this verdict.

All: GUILTY!

A-kun's VO: [deadpanned] Ha, ha.

Nabiki: It had poor characterization of everyone, no one knew what Clan Akane or Ukyou, no one even knew if Kasumi was a vampire or not before the day she turned to dust, there's no discipline to turn you into a CAT (wolf or bat is fully possible with Protean 4 unless you use Obfuscate: Mask of Thousand Faces), few vampires can survive prolonged exposure to direct sunlight, no one seemed to be capable of actually DRINKING blood, etcetra, etcetra, etcetra.

Ukyou: The idea was okay, but the actual transition tanked it from the get go. ;^_^;

Ryouga: Not to mention, he kept forcing the characters into 1-dimensional personalities and then taking it to the extreme.

Shin: Yeah, the constant Akane-pounding-Ranma made no sense.  Plus as Nabiki pointed out, we don't know what Clan people are.  Sure, it keeps them from becoming set into a Clan stereotype, but the usual stereotypes are far worse.

Kodachi: And Nabiki's knowledge that Kasumi would become a Wraith?  Not everyone is so lucky in the Wraith universe.  If you'd read the history, you'd know that in recent years, more and more people have been falling directly into Oblivion.  Not to mention all the soul-reapers and the other menaces to Wraiths.

Alexander: Yeah, if you think about all of the other possibilites, being a vampire starts looking like the best alternative... well, except for the paranoid belief that the Antediluvians will devour us all.

Akane: And what of Mages?  Or Lupines?  Or Government Agents?  Or Vamp Hunters?  We would've been facing those long ago.  Vampires have never had it very easy.

Flaw: And why in the name of the Justicars would NABIKI drink sake and Happosai's blood?  That stuff would be almost pure salt.

Nabiki: We may sound like rules lawyers, but when someone tried so hard and failed so miserably, well....

Shin: Plus, I got the feeling that the authors knew less than we did about clans and such.

    [The groups nods in unison as the author transfered them back into Prose.]

===============================================================================================

    Nabiki yawned.
    "So, we free to go?" Nabiki asked.
    "Yeah, you can go.  But I expect a little more appreciation for my hardwork when we return to making Roku-Bun No San 3.  Got that?" A-kun queried.
    "Fine." the group grumbled in response.
    Akane and Ukyou emptied the fridge into a sack Kodachi had brought along and the group left.
    A-kun sighed.
    "Oh well, got this one done." A-kun noted, before noticing the reader was still there.
    A Justicar burst through the door and lunged for A-kun.
    "SON OF A BIT-" A-kun yelped, hitting a button.

    \|||/
    --*--  Koooooooooooooooooo...........
    /|||\

Author's Note: P-R-P-Chan and neB aren't the only people to wonder what it would be like to combine the World of Darkness and an Anime.  John Biles and Jeff Hosmer are (SLOWLY) making a combination of Sailor Moon and WOD.  In my opinion, it's nice to have a representative from every Clan, but it gets redundant.
    As I showed, even I fall prey to that thinking, but I will give P-R-P-Chan and neB a point for bringing out a Setite (or whatever Nabiki's supposed to be), but as my Nabiki pointed out, no one would know what the hell everyone else was.  I know everyone would be all hush-hush, but they could've given us a clue.  And it's not like a vampire can't learn something outside of it's Clan Disciplines, it just takes a little longer.
    If I were to guess what their Akane was, I'd have to say Caitiff.  Same would go to the other Ukyou.  Can't really blame me for getting that interpretation.  They weren't exactly showing a lot of obviousness in their attitudes.
    As I said, the best place for WOD information, especially about Vampire the Masquerade, is at http://php.indiana.edu/~adashiel/wod/ and you can visit his WOD homepage to find out more about the vampire clans.
    The homepage's manager has got information from each of the Clan books and more.  As I said, he doesn't give very much and he's missing some information, like the intimate information on some of the clans, but he's got plenty.
    I'm sorry if I offend anyone.  This was meant as a commentary as all MSTs are... at heart.  Sometimes, we read something that could be so much more and we have to vent our frustrations that it's not as good as it could have been.  Other times, we wish we could have helped this person write this story better.  This story could've been a lot better and so much more, so I'm frustrated.
    They meant well, they probably did, but WOD is intended to be dark and in the standard Nerima, people can't die.  That's why I'm not using the original Ranma 1/2 universe in my WOD story.  I had to reconstruct from the ground up.
    If you're wondering, yes, I try to cover my ass.  The first time I wrote Roku-Bun No San, I wanted a story with as many moods I could generate, but I often got distracted by something and that always influences my writing.  Music, a game, thoughts, other stories and such.  In part 2, I made the stupid mistake of forcing a critical weakness onto my once perfect warrior, Shin.  At the time, I made up some bullcrap about damaged nerves.  When I started on part 3, I couldn't figure out what I wanted to do.  Shin was too perfect, even with that flaw.
    So, what if Ranma and Ranko wound up in a world where Shin existed instead of them, but it was a WOD world?  AH-HA!

Hope P-R-P-Chan and neB aren't too mad about this.  I don't mean to offend (yeah, I'm still a coward), but I just wanted this story to be so much more.

A-kun
Visit my webpage at http://www.geocities.com/Tokyo/Island/3968/index.html (damn, gotta update this thing!)
Visit my online comic at http://chaosrpg.keenspace.com/
And e-mail me at akun15@hotmail.com
_________________________________________________________________
Get your FREE download of MSN Explorer at http://explorer.msn.com

         .---Anime/Manga Fanfiction Mailing List----.
           | Administrators - ffml-admins@anifics.com |
           | Unsubscribing - ffml-request@anifics.com |
           |     Put 'unsubscribe' in the subject     |
           `-----http://ffml.anifics.com/faq.txt------'