Okay, here's chapter two of this thing. I just spent
an hour re-writing it so it should make some sense as
opposed to not making sense. That's about all I have
to say except:
PLEASE C&C THIS FIC!!!!!!
PLEASE C&C THIS FIC!!!!!!
PLEASE C&C THIS FIC!!!!!!
PLEASE C&C THIS FIC!!!!!!
PLEASE C&C THIS FIC!!!!!!
PLEASE C&C THIS FIC!!!!!!
Get the message yet? This part really needs it too. I
have no writing skills to speak of.
=====
Ryo Muhoshida --- the perverted artist/writer of Fallout Studios. If you love me, you'll go to http://www.falloutstudios.cjb.net
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-- Attached file included as plaintext by Listar --
-- File: baka02.txt
-- Desc: baka02.txt
Script for Baka Yaro (Semi-final Version)
Written by M. Steven Marquez Jr. and Robert G. Cunningham
aka. Ryo Muhoshida and Kenji Miyazawa
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Standard Disclaimer: Baka Yaro and all characters are (c)1997-2001 Fallout Studios. Any reproduction of this without proper consent is prohibited. In other words, don't use this without asking or you'll be picking your teeth out of your ballsack.
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New Characters:
Sotoyome Kenzan- [fa:c2][continuing]
Shin's childhood friend and the eternal victim. He used to be equal to Shin, but his lack of training has been his undoing. He is a genius and likes to invent things. He usually invents weapons of mass destruction and overly complex machines that do nothing at all. His hobby is hitting on girls. As of now, he holds the record for rejections. He wears glasses and without them on he is nearly blind. This is used as a running joke when he hits on girls without wearing his glasses.
Iyashima Katsuyori- [fa:c2][la:c13 phased out]
The ever submissive sub-commander of the feared Diamondback gang. He is a world class kickboxer and he uses his prize money to run a successful restraunt on campus. In his free time, he reads porno and watches hentai tapes.
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Chapter 2: Grudges and Alliances
Cut to the school. Ryo is already there while the others are far behind. Ryo takes this moment of peace to stare at girls.
Ryo: Hello nurse!
The others arrive and try to find the office. They manage not to fight until they are in front of the principal's office. The principal hears them and stops them. He is the 'tank guy' from earlier. He still has bandages.
Principal: What the hell are you doing here?
Shin: What does it look like? We're going to school
Principal: How dare you speak to me like that! I'll teach you punks a lesson!
The principal gets beaten up pretty badly and the guys manage to register for school. The bell rings and the all rush off to their first class.(wow, we really copped out of writing this fight)
Scene cuts to Math class. Ryo sits at the back of the class, Shin sits in the middle. Every girl in the room follow him with their eyes. The other two take their seat as well, far away from each other.
Ryo: *Ha! I'm at the back of the class!! I ain't gonna learn shit here* (out loud) Hahahahaha!!!!!
Everyone looks at him like he's nuts.
Ryo: Oops...
Shin: *Why are all of the girls looking at me that way? It's like this everywhere. Oh well. This sure is a boring class.*
Tatchi: *What is this guy talking about? Why am I here? I don't need school!!*
Kirin: *The great Kirin is above these simple problems. He must train, not learn!*
Teacher: Mister Hideoshi, would you kindly answer a problem?
Shin: It's Shin, and sure.
All of the girls in the classroom sigh.
Teacher: (Motions to a coconut) If I were to throw this coconut at you at 50 kilometers per hour, and you were 15 meters away, how long would it take for the coconut to hit you in the head?
Shin: It wouldn't hit me. I would knock it out of the air before it hit me.
Teacher: It would still hit your fist.
Shin: I could do it without actually touching it.
Teacher: Oh really.
Teacher picks up the coconut and launches it at Shin.
Shin: Ha!
Shin punches the coconut without touching it. THe ki surrounding his fist lights it on fire and knocks it back at the shocked teacher. The teacher screams in horror as the fireball hits him square in the chest, flinging him into the blackboard, and setting him on fire.
Teacher: (Raspy voice) Would you please go to the principles office?
Everyone stares at Shin as he shrugs and walks out of the room.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Later that day...
Shin and the others enter the Kyosuke dojo looking like French soldiers in World War I. Kyo looks up from his porno maga and takes a swig of sake. Shin collapses on the couch while the others just dogpile on him.
Shin: Get... offa me.
Ryo: Too tired to move. Homophobia rising.
Tatchi: Shut up.
Ryo: Okama
Tatchi summons up enough strength to toss Ryo and Kirin off of him. Shin rolls over to take up the whole couch while he still can. Tatchi draws his bamboo sword and levels it at Ryo.
Tatchi: Muhoshida! Prepare to die for you offenses against me!
Ryo: (grinning) What would those be?
Tatchi: Uh...I don't know and I don't care! Prepare to meet your maker!
Ryo: Oooh! Scary!
Tatchi leaps to the sttack and Ryo leaps to avoid it. Both fighters suddenly fall over and begin grumbling about school being hell. Kirin has returned from the kitchen with armfulls of snacks. He sits down and begins to devour them. Kyo turns back to his porno mag.
Kyo: It was so quiet while you were gone.
Shin begins to say something notso witty in reply when Azusa enters the house.
Azusa: Tadaima!
Kyo: Hello my well endowed granddaughter.
Ryo has suddenly regained his strength and runs for Azusa. He dives toward her intending to land somewhere in the vicinity of breastville. Just before he reaches her, a blur knocks him into the wall. He falls to the floor and starts to get up. A picture falls off the wall and hits him on the head, knocking him out cold.
Azusa: Grandfather, guess who I met after school?
Kyo: A worthy heir to my school?
Azusa: No silly. Another student.
If Shin and the others were capable of it, they would have facefualted. Instead Kyo downed the rest of his sake.
Kyo: Don't joke like that girl! You know my old heart can't take it!
Azusa: No, really! He's a karate master and he's rich!
Kyo: Rich? Well okay now! Where is the lucky man?
Youth: Right here.
A figure steps out from the shadows hwere Ryo has fallen. The boy appears to be Shin's age and wearing a military jacket and baggy black pants. He has light blue hair and green eyes which can barely be seen behind a pair of thick glasses. He looks a bit irate at the moment.
Youth: You should keep your pet on a leash.
Ryo unconciously gives the youth the finger. The boy looks around the room at Shin and the others. He sneers contemptfully.
Youth: Are these worthless slugs your students?
Shin: (sitting up) And who the hell are you?
Youth: I am Sotoyome Kenzan, blackbelt karate master and heir to Sotoyome Heavy Industries.
He strikes a dramatc pose and removes his glasses, then turns to Azusa and smiles. Shin has begun to crawl out the back door trying not to draw attention to himself.
Kenzan: Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?
Azusa: (sweatdropping) Uh... what?
Kenzan: You must be tired. You've been running through my dreams all night.
Azusa: Okay... I'm gonna go now.
Azusa backs away from Kenzan and turns to go to the kitchen and crosses Shin's path. Shin, not seeing where he is going crawls under the girl's skirt. She stops, her face turning beat red. Several seconds go by before Shin slowly backs out. He looks up at her, his face even redder.
Shin: I...uh...uh...
Suddenly, blood erupts from his nose like Mt. St. Helens on the author's birthday. he falls on his face unconsious. Azusa slams a malet over his head for good measure. Kenzan rolls Shin over with his foot and stares at the boy's face.
Kenzan: I've seen this pervert before. Hmm. Bloody nose, looks like a bum. I wonder where I saw him?
Azusa: Who cares? He saw my panties. And I'm still a virgin!
Ryo: I can fix that. Hehehehehehe!
Azusa smashes Ryo back to dreamland with her mallet. Kenzan shakes his head.
Kenzan: Honestly sensei. How can you have bums like this as students?
Kirin rises to his feet in anger. He turns, his face is full of crums.
Kirin: Kirin is no vagabond! Kirin is descended from the noble line of the Oda clan! To preach such a falshood would be treason at best!
Kenzan: What?
Tatchi: I think he said he's gonna pummel you.
Kenzan: Oh.
Kirin: Prepare to be smote!
Kenzan: Fine with me. I don't mind a fight at all.
Kirin lunges for Kenzan but the blackbelt is too fast for him. He leaps back and sends a hard kick to the wrestler's chin. Kirin staggers back in ovious pain. Kenzan attacks this time with a sweep kick which Kirin jumps over, only to be hit in the temple with a roundhouse as Kenzan spins around while standing. Kirin sails through the air and crashes down through the table, shattering it. He is out cold. Kenzan smirks. Kyo stands.
Kyo: That style of yours seems so familiar. Who was your teacher?
Kenzan: Hideoshi Shingen. I was his star pupil.
Shin: Like hell you were! I was always better than you.
Shin has awoken and is holding his nose with one hand and nursing the huge bump on his head with the other. He realizes his mistake and turns to run. He slams face first into the frying pan that Azusa held in his path. He backs away, seemingly trapped.
Kenzan: I knew I remembered you from somewhere. That arrogant mouth of yours has betrayed you Hideoshi.
Shin: Now Kenzan! Let's not get angry here!
Kenzan: Oh of course not. You only knocked out my security guards, tied me to a tree and took off with 500,000 yen!
Shin: I needed that money! Like you even missed it.
Kenzan: That's not the point! I challenge you to a duel, now!
Shin: But I'm hungry...
Kyo: How nice to see young men duel again. It reminds me of my youth.
Shin and Kenzan face off in the yard. Both are wearing karate uniforms with blackbelts. Kyo, Tatchi, Kirin and Ryo are watching. Azusa is in the kitchen cooking. Kenzan has a blood hungry look in his eyes. Shin is just has a hungry look. Kenzan leaps to the attack and aims a punsh at the boy's face. Shin tries to dodge but gets clipped on the cheek. He narrows his eyes and sends a roundhouse at Kenzan.
Kenzan jumps over it and knees Shin in the face, drawing blood. Shin staggers back and holds his nose. He sees the blood running down his arm. His eyes glaze over a little and he charges at Kenzan.
Shin: DIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!
Kenzan: Huh? That's my line.
Shin puches at Kenzan who blocks it. Shin grabs the youth's arm and punches with his other arm. Kenzan blocks again and Shin grabs that arm as well. With both hands tied up, Shin headbutts Kenzan in the face, drawing large amounts of blood and shattering his glasses. He does it again and drops Kenzan. The youth falls to the ground in pain. He rises on shaky legs.
Kenzan: Is that all you have?
Shin: I've got some more if you wanna find out.
Kyo shakes his head, knowing full well where this was heading. He holds up his hand.
Kyo: STOP!!! Dinnertime!
Ryo: Daaananana... (Starts dancing like MC Hammer with the music in the background. Everyone looks at him funny for a moment and stampedes into the house; including Shin and Kenzan.)
Azusa serves masses of food which dissapears instantly. She brings out more food and everyone devours it. When only one bowl of rice is left, a battle royal begins over who gets to eat it. Yells can be heard from a block away
Voices: "It's mine!!! Unhand that at once you fiend! Take that you jerk!!!" and so on.
Kyo manages to get everyone outside for a little talk about manners.
Kyo: I won't have it! You cannot beat the snot out of each other at every meal!
Shin: Why not?
Ryo: Yeah!
Kirin: Kirin does not need manners! Kirin is a...
Ryo: ...moron!
Kirin: Hey!
Kenzan: Let's finish our fight Hideoshi.
Shin: Fine with me.
Kyo: No, I'll not have anymore boodshed in my home.
Kenzan: But sensei, It's a duel of honor!
Shin: I wanna beat the bastard around a little more.
Kyo: No. Hideoshi, apologize to Sotoyome at once.
Shin: What?
Kyo: Do it.
Shin: ...sorry bout stealing your money and beating you up.
Kenzan: Hmph!
Later that night...
Everyone save Hiroshi has entered the dojo and gone to their own corner to sleep.
Ryo: Where's Sotoyome going to sleep? This room isn't big enough and I refuse to sleep near any of you because it would be sick.
Kenzan: Perhaps if I was a woman.
Ryo: Well you ain't you queer so go home!
Kenzan: I'm no queer! Maybe your homophobia is hiding your true colors!
Ryo: Why you!
Kenzan: A battle then? To see who's more of a man!
Ryo: You're on 'cause when it comes to peepin' I'm the most serious man in Japan!
Kenzan: Just peeping? God you're a wuss.
Ryo: You wanna throw in tit grabbin' and panty stealin' then? Fine!
Tatchi: Is that even legal? I better stop them.
Shin: Probably not.
Kirin: It's too late to stop those fools. They have already left.
Shin: Oh well. More room in here for us now.
The next morning:
As Shin, Tatchi and Kirin ready themselves for another hellish day in school, Ryo and Kenzan return looking like they were hit with a hammer alot, but smiling.
Shin: You guys fight or something?
Ryo: nope, felt alot of women though.
Kenzan: and looked under their skirts.
Ryo: We barely survived but it was great.
Kenzan: I'm gonna go to school with you guys just so I can do it all again.
Tatchi: Ugh. No one has any honor anymore.
Monday at school...
Shin: Damn, this school is bigger than I thought!
Tatchi: Let's look around. Never know when that might come in handy.
Ryo: Sure why not. I wanna find the women's dorm rooms.
Kirin: What is that up ahead.
Kenzan: A big group of people it seems.
Shin: A fight!
The idiot teens rush off to see the fight. It is actually very one-sided as there are 10 guys in judo uniforms stomping on one student.
Shin: They're just trashing him. That ain't fair. Lets do something.
Ryo: Yeah, I love fighting. Almost as much as peeping.
Shin and Ryo jump in and trash the punks. One gets away and calls for back up. Shin and the others ready themselves for a fight. They are shocked to find 50 gang members in judo uniforms charging at them.
Lead Punk: Feel the bite of the Diamondback Gang!
Shin: How cheezy can you get? (Rolls his eyes)
Ryo: Come on, you can come up with a better cliche than that!
Shin and Co. begin trashing punks when another punk shows up and calls off the attack. He is wearing a judo uniform with cut off sleves and a bandana that keeps his unruly hair out of his eyes.
Shin: Hey, we were having fun. Who are you anyways?
Punk: My name is Katsuyori Iyashima. I'm second in command of this gang.
Shin: Really? They kinda suck.
Katsuyori: What they lack in strength, they make up in numbers. There are currently 300 members.
Ryo: Are we gonna fight you now?
Katsuyori: No, all of you against me would be stupid odds.
Shin: That didn't stop your punks.
Katsuyori: That man was capable of beating them. He was sloppy and he pissed off our leader.
Kenzan: Who's he?
A wind stirs Katsuyori's hair.
Katsuyori: The God of the Judo World. (Cue thunder) The ultimate Martial artist (cue thunder) He is Death personified and my leader(Lightning)
Shin: Oooooooooo, scary...(Eyes get wide and sparkly) Don't get me started. I don't care how good he is, I'll beat his punk ass no prob.
Katsuyori: I'll pass that along. Can I have your name? (Pulls out a notepad and a pen.)
Shin: Hideoshi Shinryu of the Hideoshi School of Karate.
Katsuyori: Great, you guys look hungry. I own a restaurant nearby. Food's on me for your excellent fighting skill.
Kirin: Excellent!
Ryo: Why so nice? We just trashed your goons.
Katsuyori: Just to show that there's no hard feelings.
Ryo: Riiiiiight.
The group begins to wander off in different directions. Shin happens upon a dojo where more judo punks are training. He grins and attacks without warning and in about five minutes, he's the only one standing. He looks at the dojo and walks to the door.
Shin: This is what I think of judo and your invincible leader.
He drops his pants and begins urinating on the door.
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The next day...
It's Tuesday morning, and it's 5 am. Shin and the others are fighting as usual. Kyo comes out to stop them again.
The camera pans over the scene. Shin and Kenzan are strangling eachother while Tatchi and Ryo are trying to fell Kirin while hitting eachother at the same time
Kyo: STOP THIS AT ONCE!!
Kenzan and Shin: Yes Sensei!
Ryo: Awww.
Tatchi: Yes.
Kirin: What dost thou wish of Kirin?
Kyo: You all cannot stay here and do this everyday. All of you but one will have to go. I've decided to hold a small tournament. The winner stays, and the losers leave. Got it?
Shin: Yeah.
Ryo: Oooh! Me first! I wanna fight Okama!
Tatchi: I'll kill you Hentai!
Kenzan: Ha! Just like a married couple.
Ryo: What was that?
Kenzan: I said-
Ryo: I heard you! Let's go right here, right now!
Kenzan: Why not. I eat punks like you for breakfast!
Ryo and Kenzan advance to the center of a crudely drawn circle. Kenzan bows, as does Ryo.
Kenzan: Prepare to meet your match, lecher!!
Ryo: Heh, this coming from the guy who hits on anything with a pulse.
Kenzan: Why you!!
Kenzan attacks with a kick, which Ryo easily dodges. Kenzan goes all out offensive, punching at Ryo. Ryo dodges, jumps up and lands behind Kenzan.
Kenzan: Dammit! Hold still! I'm gonna-- (Continues attacking)
Ryo: (Still dodging.)You know, you leave a big opening when you fight.
Kenzan: Where?
Ryo: Your MOUTH!
Ryo kicks Kenzan in the jaw, knocking him over.
Kenzan: Ahh! You're gonna pay for that!
Kenzan springs up and connects with a flying kick to the chest, sending Ryo sprawling.
Ryo: Not bad. Now let's see how you handle my attacks!
Ryo attacks. While Kenzan blocks with all his speed most of the punches hit Kenzan.
Kenzan: Wow. You're so weak, I hardly felt those.
Kenzan attacks again, only to have his moves countered. Ryo punches, but Kenzan pulls it into a judo throw, sending Ryo into a tree. Ryo hits the tree feet first and rebounds, landing on the ground.
Ryo: Your style is much like that of Hideoshi. Too bad I could beat him with my eyes closed.
Kenzan: Keep in mind that I'm faster and far more cunning than Shin is.
Ryo: Not saying much, considering Hideoshi is about as cunning as a bowl of wet liver.
Shin: Why you!!
Shin is forcibly held back by Kyosuke.
Kyosuke: Let it go, Shin! You'll have your turn!
Shin: That bastard! I'm fightin' him next!!
Kenzan: Not likely, considering I'm gonna wipe the floor with this perverted bastard!
Tatchi: Hideoshi-san. Where did you meet this guy again?
Shin: Kenzan? I met him when I was 7 I think. I was training in China with my grampa.
Tatchi: China? I've got family there.
Shin: Really? I might know them. We traveled around alot. Anyways...
(Start Flashback)
The flashback begins with Shin ambushing Kenzan in the forest, and trying to rob him blind. As he leaves, Kenzan notices the symbol on Shin's shirt which means 'dragon'. Shin takes the '4 eyed boy' to see his grandfather via the hardest route possible. Kenzan finally catches up and is introduced to Shin's grandfather, Shingen who tells Shin to beat Kenzan to a pulp as a test. Kenzan manages to defend himself but still loses. Shingen lets him stay when he learns the boy is rich. Shin makes fun of his grandfather's greed and gets hit over the head with a staff.
(End Flashback)
Tatchi: Wow. Your grandfather sounds like Kyosuke-sensei.
Shin: He's kind of like him. Kyosuke-sensei is nicer and he doesn't hit me with a stick all of the time. He also seems more honorable too. But we learned alot from that old man.
Tatchi:(taking notes)hmm...
Shin: What are you doing?
Tatchi: I don't want to forget this coversation.
Shin: Just don't forget where you put that notebook.
Kirin: They are still fighting.
Shin: Yep, Kenzan and I are about equal it seems. Even after all these years.
The boys turn back to the fight where Ryo now has Kenzan's glasses, and is dancing around him.
Ryo: Can't see me! Can't see me! Ha ha ha!
Kenzan: You idiot! I can still hear you!
Ryo: Huh?
Kenzan attacks with a kick that Ryo barely dodges, the blind boy then grabs Ryo's shirt.
Ryo: Hey! Leggo you homo!
Kenzan: I'll close your mouth for good.
Ryo: I think not!
Ryo brings his knee up between Kenzan's legs. Kenzan grunts in pain and lets Ryo go. Ryo cracks his knuckles and grins maliciously.
30 seconds later, Ryo is victorious in an un-honorable sense, but victorious none the less.
Kyo: Hideoshi, Kotobuki. You're up. And no weapons.
Tatchi: Yes sensei.
Both Shin and Tatchi step into the circle. Shin drops into his stance while Tatchi just stands there, unsure of what to do. Shin looks surprized, but attacks anyways with a kick aimed at Tatchi's head.
Tatchi leans back effortlessly to avoid it. Shin punches but Tatchi evades again. This keeps up for a good minute until Shin decides to end it with his special attack.
Shin: Burning Knuckle Punch!
Shin jumps at the long-haired youth with fire surrounding his fist. Tatchi sidesteps at the last second and punches Shin in the ribs. Shin falls over but recovers quickly. He retaliates with a roundhouse which misses. Shin grins and drops into a new stance. His body begins to glow with blue light. Sweat beads on his brow in concentration. Tatchi is just as cluless as everyone else.
Shin thrusts his hands forward and yells.
Shin: Shinkuu~Ha!
A blue-white ball of energy flies from Shin's hands and slams into the shocked Tatchi, knocking him into the wall of the yard. He falls face first to the ground decidedly out cold. Shin drops to his knees, exausted from the attack.
Kyo: My God. When did you learn that?
Shin: ...from...the old... old man.
Kyo: Shingen's secret attack. I didn't dream that you could do it as well.
Shin I save it for tough opponents...it's really tiring.
Ryo jumps up and down. Kirin looks on, bored. Tatchi is still out. He's in the house in bed. Azusa is tending to him due to the burns he recieved. Shin gets to his feet.
Shin: C'mon let's finish this now.
Kirin: Yes, a three-way match is in order.
Ryo: Works for me. It'll take more than two guys to beat me though.
Shin: Shut up.
Kirin: Kirin is more than enough to deal with the likes of you.
The three step into the makeshift ring and drop to their respective stances. Kirin charges at Shin. Shin prepares himself.
Kirin: The vengence of heavan is slow but sure. You will pay for Kirin's last defeat at your vile ha-...
Ryo: Shut your yap.
Kirin staggers from the kick to the back of his head. Ryo jumps over him to face Shin.
Ryo: Let's go ladies' man.
Shin: I wouldn't turn my back on Kirin if I were you.
Ryo: Oh! I'm sooooooo scared of him.
Ryo feels arms encircle his waist. He can do nothing to stop Kirin's Belly to Back Suplex which knocks him out on contact with the ground.
Kirin spits on his inert form.
Kirin: As well you should perverted one.
Shin: Nice move man.
Kirin: Feh. T'was nothing.
Shin: Here I come.
Shin punches at Kirin but it his hand is grabbed. Kirin pulls him into a one handed throw. Shin spins in mid-air and lands on his feet. He is grabbed again and thrown at the wall. Shin turns and hits it feet first. He grunts in pain, but manages to spring off and headbut Kirin in the sternum. Both fighters fall to the ground. A spectator walking by the yard with spiked black hair gets a weird look on his face.
Spectator: Why do they always do moves that kill them both?
Shin manages to rise to his feet as Kirin is counted out.
Shin does his best victory pose and looks to Kyosuke for aproval. The master seems to be deep in thought though.
Kyo:*They are all so good, especialy Hideoshi. I have one more test though.*
Shin: Master? wha-?
Kyosuke moves to Shin and thrusts out an open hand to Shin's chest. Shin grunts and falls over to unconciousness.
That night...
Shin is still out cold from the strike from Master Kyosuke. The others are eating dinner. They have bandages their wounds. For once, they eat in peace.
Kenzan: Still, Shin won the tournament. I don't mind watching you guys living on the street.
Ryo: Shut up. I was distracted. Ladies Man and the Human Moron teamed up against me.
Tatchi: Just what distracted you again?
Ryo: Shut up Okama.
Kirin: Hahahahaha... Okama... ha ha...ha
Kenzan: Well... I propose a rematch. In one weeks time.
Ryo: Good. Maybe we can miss school again.
Shin:(entering with a large bruise on his chest) I won. Why are you still here?
Kyo: I've decided to take you all on as students. I know it's breaking tradition but you all ahve so much potential.
Shin: Great. Just great.
Azusa enters the room with an envelope. She walks up to Shin who begins to blush as he remembers the other day's events. Azusa blushes too as she remembers. She hands him the envelope.
Azusa: This is for you. I found it stuck to the door with a knife.
Shin: A knife?
Kenzan: Must be a challenge for revenge.
Shin: Why?
Kenzan: Revenge challenges always have knives with the note you dolt.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Morning at the Kyosuke Residence. Kyo is doing exercises in the yard. The idiot teenagers are asleep in the dojo. Kyo looks up to see Shin up in the tree watching him.
Kyo: How long have you been there?
Shin: Ever since you started. You really are good. I could barely follow your moves.
Kyo: You could actually follow them?
Shin: A little...
Kyo: Where are your idiot friends?
Shin: They ain't my friends and they're still asleep.
Kyo: Good. And you're awake early.
Shin: I'm used to getting up at this time.
Kyo: Something taught by your grandfather?
Shin: Ya know about him?
Kyo: Yes. I could tell by your style. And your Hisatsu Waza.
Kyo: You're Shingen Hideoshi's grandson.
Shin: Yep.
Kyo: It flatters me that you think you can learn something here. Why are you really here?
Shin: Following my father's footsteps I guess.
Kyo: .... Be careful.
Shin: What?
Kyo: Don't act like you don't know what I'm talking about. I know what you're after. Your father wouldn't want you to kill yourself needlessly. He gave his life to the Art. You need to distract yourself from it. I may be able to help you there.
Shin: ....
Ryo: What ya talkin' bout?
Shin: Ahhhhh! What did you hear?
Ryo: Everything. Tryin to get the master to accept you huh? While we were asleep. Hahaha. I ain't that dumb.
Kirin: What is this that disturbs the noble slumber of the great Kirin. Speaketh now or forever hold thy tongue in thy hands.
Ryo: What the hell are you talking about?
Kirin: The mighty Kirin speaks of--
Ryo: That was a ree-hit-or-ak-ial question.
Kyo: That's "rhetorical".
Ryo: Master! Watch your language! Honestly! A martial arts master should know how to not swear in front of his diciples!
Kyosuke backhands him, spinning him around.
Shin: Woah! Just like grandpa! Well, without the stick. Hey Oda,... ahem... let us finish the conflict that we ... hath ... initiatiated yesterday so that the mighty Shin may kicketh your asseth, ya putz.
Kirin: Flattery will get you nowhere. En guarde!
Shin: The mighty Shin will layeth the smacketh down on your candy ass!
Shin attacks with a punch that Kirin effortlessly grabs. Kirin flips Shin over and slams him into the ground. Shin bounces, flips and lands on his feet.
Shin: Round two... FIGHT!
Shin leads with a flying kick, aimed at the side of Kirin's head. Kirin grabs the foot and pulls Shin into a pile driver. Kirin leaves Shin in the ground, headfirst.
Kirin: Feh, what good is karate when it can be countered by professional wrestling moves. Truly it is folly to challenge the benevolent Kir--
Kirin is cut off when he it hit in the head by the flat of Tatchi's blade. Kirin's eyes close halfway.
Kirin: That hurt, you know.
Tatchi: Your incoherent babbling woke even ME!
Ryo sneaks behind Tatchi with a ridiculously large pair of scissors and is about to cut his hair when Tatchi swings his sword back and hits Ryo in the head.
Ryo: Ow! How did you--
Tatchi spins, his sword returns to his belt in a blur and Tatchi punches Ryo several times in the gut. The sword comes out and there is a flash as the tree next to Tatchi is severed and falls-- directly onto Kirin... and Ryo. Tatchi then turns his head, just in time to see Shin's fist implanted into it.
Shin: Sorry, Master, for the interruption.
Kyo: Allowing your enemies to weaken each other before stepping in? Good tactic.
Shin: Naw, I just thought it was funny as hell to watch those bastards beating each other. So, are you ready to train me yet?
The other three snap to attention, Kirin throws the tree off of him.
Ryo: Train who?
Kirin: The mighty Kirin will not allow--
Tatchi: Shut the hell up and let's deal with this honorless bastard.
All three of them jump Shin and beat the hell out of him. Kyosuke shakes his head.
Tatchi: My turn to beat Oda down.
Ryo: Ahh no ya don't! I'm takin' you down and cutting your hair.
Tatchi: Why you--
Tatchi's sword blurs down in an overhead arc. Tatchi's eyes widen as his sword stops. Ryo is holding a staff horizontally, blocking the bamboo stick.
Ryo: A little faster than you thought, huh?
Ryo turns the staff down so the sword tip is in the ground he hits Tatchi in the hand, Tatchi whips his hand away, the handle of the sword is still in his hand, which is turned away.
Ryo: Awwww, broke your sword?
Ryo picks up the sword and sees that it is hollow.
Ryo: Hollow? Then that must mean--
Tatchi rotates his hand and an elegant katana comes into view.
Ryo: Shit.
Tatchi attacks, and Ryo manages to deflect the strikes with his staff. Tatchi is obviously better with his sword than Ryo is with his staff. Tatchi grins while Ryo begins to sweat.
Tatchi: Ready to end this?
Ryo is starting to wear down. He then grins as well.
Ryo: You really are good. But... I'm better!
Ryo pulls his staff in half to reveal a chain connecting the two halves. He uses the chain and wraps it around Tatchi's sword and smirks. Tatchi isn't so amused. He effortlessly cuts the chain and continues his onslaught, shredding Ryo's clothes in the process. Ryo tosses his useless weapon away and dodges the sword strikes. Ryo jumps away to a safe distance and curses. Tatchi grins victoriously.
Tatchi: Give up?
Ryo: No...not yet.
Ryo charges forward and disapears right as Tatchi brings his sword down. Hitting only air, Tatchi brings his sword to block. He falls to his knees as he is hit from behind with a rock. He turns and cuts the next rock thrown at him in half. This continues for quite some time. Just as Tatchi blocks one rock, he is hit by another in the back of the head.
Tatchi: Come out and fight!
Ryo steps out from behind a tree, hands behind his back. Tatchi stabs at Ryo, who produces a large rock in each hand and smashes them together on Tatchi's head just as Tatchi's sword cuts into Ryo's left shoulder. Both combatants fall to the ground, clutching their injured areas. Ryo is up first, he tears off his shirt and wraps it around the cut, assuming his stance again, with a very, very serious look on his face. Tatchi stands as well, leaning heavily on his sword. He shakes his head a few times, then brings his sword up to its position.
Kyo: ENOUGH! This will end before someone is killed.
Tatchi: Yes, master. (Falls over.)
Ryo: Ha! I... win...
Ryo falls to his knees and passes out.
Kirin: Had that battle progresses any further, methinks Kotobuki wouldst have met an untimely end.
Shin: I'd have to disagree. Tatchi was looking very seriously pissed off there.
Kirin: Doubt my prediction, will you?
Shin: I certainly will! What're you gonna do about it you overgrown chimp?
Kirin: Flattery will get you nowhere.
Kirin grabs Shin by the shirt. Shin punches Kirin in the face. Kirin goes to use the piledriver, but Shin hits Kirin in some pressure points along his side. Kirin drops him and begins cursing in a very non-elegant manner. Kirin has two huge, nasty looking bruises in his sides. Kyosuke looks impressed. Kirin falls to the ground face first and doesn't stir. Shin walks inside and passes out the instant he gets inside. Kyosuke shakes his head.
Kyo: *So... Hideoshi is after the very technique which killed his father.*
Two hours later, Tatchi and Ryo are awake and getting ready for a grueling day at school along with Shin and Kirin. Azusa is already ready and is waiting for the group.
Shin: Another day of hell. At least I get to have a duel to pass the time.
Ryo: Lucky you. I'll just have to make my own fun.
Kirin: And that would be?
Ryo: Sneak in the girls' shower and spy on naked girls of course.
Tatchi: You sick weirdo. When will you grow up?
Ryo: As soon as you aren't a long-haired okama anymore.
Tatchi unsheathes his sword and begins brandishing it wildly.
Tatchi: I'll kill you. Today, at the quad at lunch.
Ryo: Is that a challenge?
Tatchi: YES! God you are stupid.
Ryo: Cool. I get a duel too! Nanananananaaa!!
Tatchi: I'm going ahead. See ya.
Ryo: Hey! Don't walk away from me! I ain't done teasing you! Hey!
Kirin: Another day. Kirin must go to the convenience store to pick up goods that will ensure his survival through the hellish ritual known as school.
Kirin goes into the store on the corner, leaving only Shin and Azusa. Shin is noticably uncomfortable, rembering the other day again
Azusa: I never really got to talk to you since you arrived. We got off to a bad start.
Shin: I...guess so.
Azusa: (blushing) I'm sorry for hitting you.
Shin: Uh...you are?
Azusa: So, where are you from?
Shin: Uh... I used to live in Hong Kong. I trained in China and Thailand, and Korea too.
Azusa: That's pretty cool.
Shin: (relaxing)Thanks. I like to talk about martial arts, ya know?
Azusa: Me too. I'm not that good but I do it to keep in shape.
Shin: That's good.
Azusa: Grandfather hasn't trained me in a long time. He has been so busy training Hiroshi lately.
Shin: I hate that kid.
Azusa: I know. He's a real brat.
Shin: Me and the others haven't bothered you have we?
Azusa: No, thanks for asking. Kotobuki-san asked that too. He's really nice, but a bit absent-minded.
Shin: Yeah.
Azusa: Those guys all have some weird thing. All except you. You're the normal one of the group.
Shin: Heh. I guess you're right.
Azusa: (blushing) You're kinda cute too.
Shin: (turning red) R...really?
Azusa: The girls at school asked about you yesterday. They wanted your number.
Shin: (very uncomfortable) He he he. I seem to have that effect on people. (Loosens collar)
Azusa: Are you okay?
Shin: Oh yeah. No prob. He he he. *God, please get me out of this situation.*
As if to answer his prayer, a yell is heard from the school.
Tatchi: Leave them alone you pervert!
Ryo: Oh shut up!
Tatchi: It's obvious they don't like you.
Ryo: How would you know? Oh yeah, it takes one to know one right?
Tatchi: Why you! DIE!!!!
Tatchi attacks with his kitana. Ryo dodges and runs away. Tatchi fumes and gives chase.
Girl: That long-haired guy was pretty cute.
Girl2: Yeah. We should follow him and ask him out.
Meanwhile, some girls have caught sight of Shin and Azusa.
Girl3: Hey! It's that Hideoshi hunk!
Girl4: Look, Azusa's hogging him all to herself.
Girl3: C'mon girls. Let's get him to go out with us!
Girls: Charge!
Shin has noticed the girls rushing at them. Azusa is bewildered, but Shin looks for an escape from his admirers. Not wanting Azusa to get trampled, Shin scoops her up in his arms and takes off, trying his best not to notice the beautiful, and well endowed girl in his arms.
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NEXT CHAPTER: Fast Break on Two Fronts
Okay. WTF is this all about? Every girl in school is chasing me with lust in their eyes. It must be the Hideoshi charm. It wouldn't be so bad if they weren't so damn scary. Oh yeah, The Okama is chasing the Hentai all over Tokyo in some sort of battle royale. Can you say "property damage"?