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Cool. Nice gift to get before New Years:
Breaking this into smaller pieces than I normally do (and to make C+Cing
easier ^_^)
$Wai! You finally listened!
This time. Don't count on me making it a habit.
"It's about time you finally showed up. We've been waiting almost half an
hour for you. I thought you weren't going to make it. And that really
would
have been too bad, since I have a feeling this is going to be the most
important meeting of all."
$Even more important than the one were we decided on the club name?
I was going to name it, 'The Last One Alive Gets Ranma' Club, but felt it
would give away too much of the story.
"Loathe as I am to agree with you, I fear you are right. Ranma has been
showing me little attention. I know he doesn't love me, but that doesn't
mean he won't fall in love with me. I know he will, once we have some time
alone and he is removed from that wicked girl's enchantment, which seems
to
beguile nearly all men. She's even managed to win the attentions of my
brother, moron that he is. It's uncanny how she does it since it seems
like
she isn't even trying."
$Hint hint. Few guys like to be chased.
By some shear coincdence, I am one of the few that does. Not that it happens
to me, mind you, but I would if it did.
The point of no return is coming soon, and if something isn't done right
now, there's no point in doing anything ever. Everyone might as well go
pack
up and start thinking about finding their future husband in some other
district."
"Forget it! Ranma's mine. There's no way I'll let Akane have him."
$Over her dead body!
Or something along those lines.
"Keep it down. The restaurant's walls aren't that thick. Now, I'll admit I
have been giving this matter some thought, and I've come up with the only
possible course of action. Look, the simple fact of the matter is Ranma
loves Akane. The only way to win his love is to get her out of the
picture.
That'll free Ranma up and then the playing field will be level for the
first
time. However, the only way to truly remove her is to get rid of her
permanently."
$Shampoo know this superpowered martial artist back in China, maybe he
kidnap Pervert-girl?
Ukyo: Umm, Shampoo, we've already tried that one. Several times.
Shampoo: Oh, Shampoo forgot.
Heh.
"Permanently? Do you mean kill Akane?"
$No, I ment we should turn her into a panda and sell her to a zoo. OF
COURSE I mean kill her!
"Of course I mean kill her."
$YAY! Everyone's turning evil!
Yep. But they are all women, and this frequently happens to them once a
month. A wise man knows to avoid them at all costs during those times.
Ranma will go on some idiotic quest to find her, and if he discovers even
a
clue to her still being alive, he'll spend the rest of his life trying to
find her. You should be the one with the least hesitation about this. You
do
have an outstanding kiss of death on her, as I recall."
"Well, yes, but that was from long time ago."
$Statute of limitations, you know.
Shampoo: And it have nothing to do with how hot Akane is in bed. Really.
"Now you is the stupid one. If Ranma ever finds out someone killed Akane,
he
won't rest until he gets the killer. Everyone knows that."
"Of course he would, which is why he can't ever have a clue that she has
been killed. She needs to just 'disappear'."
$Ranma is thick headed. He'd probably never think that she was killed.
Well, she does qualify it with 'If Ranma ever finds out she was killed...'
"You're right. Ranma's mine, not hers, and she knows it. I haven't been
after him for over half of my life just to give up now. She should have
backed off when she knew that I had prior claim and really love Ranma.
$HAH HAH HAH! Oh, please stop. My sides are aching.
Ukyou: Why won't anyone sympathize with my plight? *Sniffle, Sniffle*
Whatever happens to her now, it's her own fault."
$Yeah, I gotta agree there. You juggle dynamite when you screw with
obssesive compulsive stalkers like these three.
Oui.
"Okay, so we lure her somewhere alone and then what? How we kill her? Who
kill her? All of us, or just one with others helping? And what we do with
body afterward so no one finds it?"
$Shampoo know this really good recipie for pork ramen!
Oh please, my tomboy okonomiyaki would taste way better than noodles.
I've got this pet alligator...
Actually that last idea comes up later.
"Hmm. If they're laying the foundations, it would be a convenient place to
dispose of the body. Bury it in some quick drying concrete in a hole in
the
ground, and no one will be the wiser."
$Personally, I'd grind her up and flush her down the public toliets bit by
bit.
That's Ukyou's plan for disposing of Nabby.
"I have an idea on that. Leave it to me. Once she's alone, I'll give you a
call to give her a call."
$Err, wait, I'm confused. How would that work?
You would have to be her middle sister in order for that to work.
"That sounds reasonable. We'll take care of matters from there. Then
afterwards, if anyone asks, we provide each other with alibis by claiming
we
happened to run into each other and had an argument which ended up at the
restaurant. With the way we're continually at each other's throats, no one
should doubt us. Few will have any suspicions that we acted in unison to
dispatch our rival. We'll even fight with each other worse than ever to
add
credibility to the idea."
$Another good idea would be to betray the other two, _almost_ save Akane,
make sure she gets out a few last breaths to her familiy from the comfort
and safty of your arms, and kill the other two.
Even greater chance of things going wrong with that plan, though. Too easy
to muck it up.
But then again, that would
be violating the KISS rule.
KISS?
and it's all Akane's fault. I can't deny I've been wondering how much
easier
things would be if Akane was removed from the picture. I keep coming up
with
a much better world than the one I'm in now and will likely end up in. I
like her well enough, but when push comes to shove, I'll choose Ranma over
her every single time."
$Too bad this isn't a lemon.
I think I've done quite enough of those lately.
park. By that time the area should be clear. Shampoo can reconnoiter it
beforehand just to make sure. If something goes wrong, Ukyou can make up
some vague rumor she heard about a casket of Nanniichuan somewhere and
tell
Akane the two of them can get together to recover it. There's an outside
chance we can work with that if things falls through, though I doubt if
they
will. It is, after all, a good plan."
$Heh, if I was in Nerima, I wouldn't trust a plan to bake a cake.
Everything screws up there.
True. But they are desperate. They're willing to take the risk Besides, with
a title like 'Good Plans' how could things possibly go wrong? :)
*sigh* I've a bad feeling about this. Ninety nine percent of the time I
don't like darkfics. The other one percent are just funny. The problem
is
I soak up the emotion like a sponge, and always end up pissed or
depressed,
both of which are not fun states for me. I can't distance myself
properly.
Yep. I can see that as a major drawback. I don't actually read too many
either, which is sort of ironic since I've got another one halfway completed
on my hardrive that's about 150K long and way darker than this. Course until
I finish it no way will I post it. Just didn't have the right mood for me
yet, and I haven't felt inclined to work on it in over a year. Only major
work I have started that isn't finished.
So, I sincerely hope you really don't make this dark, or, if you do, that
you screwed it up and I won't be affected. Faint hope there, given how
good
your fics are normally. With that said, I continue on.
I shall try my best.
D.B. Sommer