This isn't exactly a fanfic, it's a script for a
future manga. We need c&c tho, so please respond!
--------------------------------
Script for Baka Yaro (Semi-final Version)
Written by M. Steven Marquez Jr. and Robert G.
Cunningham
aka. Ryo(TPN) and Kenji Miyazawa
Artist's Note: This story is exceedingly cheezy and
rips off of many fine anime and manga. It was posted
on the FFML awhile back and I hope that you'll enjoy
reading it. Keep in mind that Kenji and I wrote this
in 1997 and reworked it quite a bit since. But it is
still a draft. The bugs can be worked out with your
help. Send us C&C so we can make this a great work of
literature. --Ryo
Writer's note: This is an early script that was just
edited. However, during the battles the sentances
tend to be fragmented and not very exciting, at least
in this stage of the game. This script is meant to be
seen, not read. It will get better, though, I
promise. Kenji out.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Standard Disclaimer: Baka Yaro is owned by Fallout
Studios(tm). If you steal our stuff, Kenji will hunt
you down with his battle axe. Some cameos may appear
and we don't claim ownership of them. Please don't sue
us! We're too pathetic. Besides, immitation is the
best form of flattery. Right?
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
STORY 01: The Cycle Begins
Chapter 1- Setting the Pace
The camera pans around the streets of a small suburb
in Tokyo, Japan. The camera stops and centers on a
house of substantial size. A wooden sign that reads
"Kyosuke Dojo" can be clearly seen. Voices can be
heard just inside the wall. A boy is standing in front
of the sign, with a large backpack on. He is wearing
a worn white martial arts gi without sleeves. His
unruly black hair and clothing mark him as a wanderer.
Boy: *Yep, this is the place. At last, the Kyosuke
dojo.* I'll be the best martial artist in the world
after I train under this guy.
Voice: Better than the mighty Kirin? Ha!
Inconceivable!
The boy looks up to see a large teenage male with a
bag of groceries in hand.
Large boy: Ha! Thou seemest hungry. Perhaps a knuckle
sandwich will supress thy hunger.
Boy: God I hate crappy puns. (clutches his stomach)
The larger boy is about to attack when a woman's
scream is heard.
Voice: Do I hear a fight?
The three are suddenly covered in a shadow as a figure
leaps through the air and lands in front of them. The
youth is smaller than both of the combatants are. He
looks at them menacingly with shadows over his face.
The shadows move and it is revealed that he has a
large goofy grin on. It is also revealed that he has
a pair of panties on his head. He carries a large pack
with porno mags and various women's underwear sticking
out.
Yet another voice: Stop you pervert!!
Boy: Wha--?
All of them turn to see another boy with a yard long
braid and a bamboo sword, who advances on the pervert.
The boy is wearing a chinese outfit and a maoist cap.
While handsome, he looks almost feminine. Make that
very feminine.
Boy with sword: How dare you--
The gate to the dojo opens and an old man in a martial
arts gi is standing before them.
Old man: What is going on here?
Boy: Are you master Kyosuke?
Old man: The same.
All of them stop and turn to him, bowing at the same
time.
All: I have come to train under--
They all look at each other and sweatdrop.
Kyo: Well, I would love to train all of you, but
family tradition requires me to only train two
students. And I'm already training my grandson,
Hiroshi, so only one of you will be able to train.
Large boy: In that case, the obvious choice is the
mighty Kirin!
Pervert: Who?
Boy: Woah, wait a minute, It'll be me!
Swordsman: For what?
Kyo: Woah, woah! Before you guys beat the crap out of
each other, I think I need some introductions.
Boy: My name is Shin Hideoshi, heir to the Hideoshi
family dojo.
Large boy: The mighty Kirin Oda is pleased to meet
you.
Swordsman: My name is... uhhh... oh yeah. Tatchi
Kotobuki... I think.
Pervert: Ryo at your service. I have come to train
under you, and I seek to steal as much women's
underwear as humanly possible.
Shin: Actually, I think you were just leaving.
Shin cracks his knuckles as the four advace towards
each other. Suddenly several female voices are heard
yelling.
Girl1: Pervert! Give us our panties back!
Girl2: Hey! Who is that cute guy in the white?
Shin looks around.
Shin: Hey! Where's Ryo? (sees women) AHHHHHHHHH!!!
Shin turns and runs directly into a wall as a mass of
women surge toward him. He shakes his head, then
smashes directly into it again, cracking it, and
collapses. The women sprint through the alley. After
they pass, Ryo sticks his head out of a garbage can
that looks far too small to fit him. He is
videotaping the girls running from behind with a
mini-camcorder. Shin staggers to his feet and shakes
his head. Kyosuke is holding a bottle of sake and
watching with intrest.
Kyo: A little shy around girls, eh Hideoshi?
Shin attempts to attack the old man, but falls to the
ground halfway there.
Tatchi: (to Ryo) I got half a mind to deliver you to
those girls bound and gagged.
Ryo: You don't have half a mind, period.
Kyo: I think you'd better all come inside.
(Blackout. Cut to inside dojo 15 minutes later. Shin
looks like hell with bruises and bandages. The girl is
in the kitchen.)
Kyo: (Holding a bottle of sake, red-faced) As you know
I am the best martial artist in the world...
Shin: (Whispers) And he's modest, too.
Kyo: ...people throughout Japan and the rest of the
world have come to train under me. I would love to
train them all but tradition and family law require
that I only train two people at once... (Continues
mumbling while Ryo thinks...)
Ryo: *Gee, how interesting, I wonder if he knows that
no-one is listening.* (Sees the stack of porno
magazines on the chair.) *Wow! Look at all of those
women! That guy has a better porno collection then I
do!*
Ryo starts drooling, The rest are half asleep. Shin
scratches the back of his head, Kirin yawns.)
Kyo: So as you see, it was in 1969 that we--
Ryo starts panting.
Tatchi: Uhh... aren't we here for a reason? What was
it again?
Kyo: Are you guys listening?
Tatchi: Uhh.. could you run that by me again?
Everyone gives Tatchi an "If looks could kill" glare.
Tatchi (typical anime blush): Ummm... Hehe, never
mind.
Shin: This is all exceedingly interesting (Yawns) but
when are we going to start training?
Kyo: As I said, I can only pick one of you to train
here. Who's it gonna be?
They are interrupted as a young woman enters the room
with tea.
Kyo: Allow me to introduce my lovely granddaughter
Azusa. Which unnya wants to marryer?
Azusa: You're drunk again, grandfather.
Kyo: That's enuff, you gobactathe kitchen.
As Azusa passes Ryo, he casually grabs her ass.
Before Tatchi's sword is halfway out, Ryo is knocked
to the ground by a massive hammer wielded by Azusa.
Kyo: So anyway, who's it gonna be? Who's gonna train
here?
Everyone looks at each other.
Kirin: I think the obvious choice is Kirin the
Magnificent!!!
Shin: Will you stop glorifying yourself you
insignificant bastard! It's gonna be me!!
Ryo: Shut up!! I'm going to feel up the girl-- I mean,
train here!!!
Tatchi: What are we talking about again?
Shin: It's obvious we should leave him out, he can't
even remember why he's here!
Tatchi: Hey!!
Kirin: Let us take this quarrel to a location that is
not indoors.
All race outside to tha backyard and get into a
square, facing each other.
Kirin: Kirin is going to teach you miserable curs a
lesson you'll never forget!!
Shin: Quit your yappin' you arrogant piece of crap!
Ryo: I'm gonna take you both out, then go back inside
and... hehe...(Pictures Azusa in his head)
Tatchi: Lets get to it!! (Draws sword)
Shin: Finally! So far, every fight in the manga has
been interrupted. We finally actually get to fight!!
All get into battle stances. Tatchi takes a swing at
Kirin, who easily dodges but gets kicked in the back
by Shin. Kirin gets up and punches at Ryo, who
effortlessly dodges the punch, flips, and kicks Kirin
into a conveniently placed pond. Ryo laughs, then
finds a conveniently placed boulder atop his head,
thrown by a very wet Kirin. Tatchi is busy dodging
Shin's punches and kicks, with no time to take a
return strike with his sword. He takes a few swings
and gets punched in the jaw. Kirin and Ryo are busy
attacking each other with a flurry of punches and
kicks. Shin appears behind them, and smacks their
heads together. They recover and attack Shin
savagely. Kirin manages a kick to the stomach,
doubling Shin over.
Ryo: Here, hold these for a sec.
Ryo hands Shin three grenades and a pair of panties.
The grenades detonate, flinging Shin high in the air,
over the wall and into the neighbors yard.
-------------------------------------------------
Scene cuts to neighbors yard. A middle aged man comes
out, sets up a lawn chair and umbrella and pulls out a
bottle.
Man: Ahhh! Mango juice!!
The man is immediately slammed into by Shin, who gets
up, spins around and jumps over the fence screaming
"I'll get you!!" Juice is spilled all over the lawn,
The man is folded up in the chair.
All four fighters are sweating and breathing hard but
decide to keep fighting. They all jump together and
fight in a cloud of smoke for about fifteen seconds,
cloud moves all over the yard.
Ryo: None of you are gonna stop me. Hahahahaha!
Ryo tosses out some grenades which explode before
anyone can get away, Ryo included. White out for a few
seconds. There is a large crater taking up most of the
screen, all four fighters are lying in it, unconscious
and blackened. Kyo's grandson, a boy a little younger
than them, starts laughing uncontrollably.
Kyo: Hiroshi, you shouldn't laugh like that, it isn't
polite.
Hiroshi continues laughing, spewing out phrases such
as "Look at 'em!", "What chumps!" and "Look at 'em
struggle!",
All four fighters get up, no longer blackened, they
look at each other, then look at Hiroshi
threateningly. Hiroshi pays no heed and continues
laughing.
Shin: Shut Up! Dammit!
Ryo: Yeah, what he said.
Hiroshi: DAAAAAAAA HAA HAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hiroshi raises head to see the four fighters advancing
threateningly on him, wipes tears from his eyes and
stands.
Hiroshi: Do you really think you can beat me in your
weakened state? You guys have used all of your
strength on each other, so you don't stand a chance
against me.
Tatchi: Let's get him!
Kirin: Kirin will punish this puny weakling!
The four surround the confident young martial artist
and attack in a daze. Hiroshi jumps and kicks Kirin
in the jaw, following it with a punch to the stomach
and a swift kick to the face. He ducks under Shins
punch from behind, Shin punches Kirin instead. Kirin
falls to the ground, unconscious.
Shin (shakes head): Fast little piece of shit.
Tatchi attacks with a blind swing. Hiroshi dodges it
easily. The swing heads for Ryo instead. Ryo dodges,
but curses Tatchi for his clumsiness. Hiroshi kicks
Ryo in the stomach while he is cursing and dodges
Tatchi's sword swing from behind, spinning around and
catching Tatchi in the face with a kick. Shin dives
for Hiroshi, Hiroshi jumps up and lands on Shin's
head, driving Shin's head into the ground. Tatchi and
Ryo both charge at Hiroshi, Hiroshi jumps up and over
the two. They collide, sending both into dreamland.
Stars encircle both combatants heads. Kirin gets up
and looks at Hiroshi, dazed. Hiroshi backs up.
Hiroshi: You woke up pretty quick.
Hiroshi thrusts his hand forward into Kirin's chest.
Kirin looks down at the point of impact and falls
straight backwards.
Hiroshi: That was it? I didn't even break a sweat!
(Tries to conceal his heavy breathing.)
Hiroshi starts laughing again. The martial arts
master takes him inside, leaving the four fighters
outside, unconscious.
Morning arises, the sun rises over the four
unconscious warriors. Shin takes his head out of the
ground and yawns. All of them rise and rub their
heads.
Tatchi: Where are we? What are we doing? WHY ARE WE
HERE?!?!?
Shin: Shut the hell up.
Kirin: Oh yeah! Kirin cannot believe he was defeated
by a mere child!!!
Tatchi: Who?
Ryo: And his cousin.... hehe...
Shin: I know, let's kidnap him and knock him out! Then
we can beat him!
Tatchi: WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU BASTARDS TALKING
ABOUT?!!!!!
Kirin: Kirin has devised a plot to deal with the
whelp.
Tatchi: Beating up a kid? Where's the honor in that?
Kirin pulls out a bottle.
Kirin: This shall knocketh the child out cold.
Shin: Let's do it!!
Tatchi: What are we talking about again?
Ryo: Chalk one more up for Tatchi's memory.
Tatchi: Shut up!! My memory is fine! I won't have
anything to do with this.
Shin: Guys, lets go.
They slip into the dojo and come back out with the kid
tied up and gagged. They take him out in the yard.
Ryo pulls out a candy bar and dumps the liquid on it.
Ryo: Hey kid, want some candy? Eat it!
Ryo force-feeds the chocolate bar to Hiroshi.
Shin: By the way, Ryo, how much did you use?
Ryo: I followed the instructions and gave him a pint.
Shin: WHAAAAAAAAAT?
Kirin: A pint? Methinks it says "pinch."
They all turn to look at Hiroshi, who has passed out
and turned green.
Ryo: Oops... ahh, whatever.
Shin: We wanted to knock him out, not kill him.
Ryo: Oh well. One less brat in the world. Less
competition for the women.
Shin: What?! He's just a kid!! We need to get him to a
hospital!
They pick up Hiroshi and carry him to the hospital.
Several days later...
Shin and the others are at the hospital with Master
Kyosuke. He is drunk again and raving about how
dishonorable it is to sneak up on someone and poison
him.
Kyo: It was probably some dishonorable assassin. Do
any of you know who did this?
All look sheepish and guilty. They mumble "no's"
Shin: Perhaps it was a rival dojo. (Laughs nervously,
hand behind head.))
Kyo: Well, when I'm done training whoever it is I'm
training, we'll find out who did it.
Ryo: Well we all know who that is going to be.
Kirin: Of course. The mighty Kirin will prevail.
(Laughs arrogantly.)
Shin: Get real!! I'm going to win!!
Tatchi: I don't remember why we're fighting, but I'll
do it!!
Tatchi draws sword and all assume battle stance. All
jump into the middle of the room and battle in a dust
cloud. Kyo puts his hands up.
Kyo: STOP!!!!
They freeze. Shin is holding onto Kirin's neck, Kirin
has fist drawn back to punch Shin.
Ryo has a staff resting on Tatchi's head, Tatchi has
his sword to Ryo's throat. Hiroshi moans. Kyo looks at
them for a moment, then shakes his head.
Kyo: If you are going to do this, do it outside!
Ryo: Let's go!!
Kirin: The mighty Kirin will punish thee!!
Cut to outside, where Ryo and Tatchi bust out a third
story window and fall to the concrete below. Kirin
smashes through the wall with Shin's foot implanted in
his chest.
Hiroshi comes to and regains his usual color.
Kyo: Are you all right? Do you need some air? How
'bout some alcohol?
Master Kyosuke goes to open the broken window. What
little was left falls out. Fighting sounds are heard
once he opens it.
"Take that fiend!" is faintly heard in Kirin's voice.
Kyo: I can't believe they're doing it again.
Hiroshi: Grandpa?
Kyo: Hiroshi? Who did this to you?
Hiroshi: *I shouldn't tell him that I was poisoned by
the guys or else he'll punish me from being caught off
guard so easily by such screw ups.* I didn't see him,
grandpa. He caught me while I was asleep.
Kyo: Damn those rival dojos! (slams bottle down on
table) Let's see how those idiots are doing.
Kyosuke goes to the Kirin-shaped hole and looks out.
All of the fighters are laying on the ground with cans
and garbage all around them. Shin bolts to his feet
and runs away screaming as a mob of women chase him.
Ryo: Why should he have all the luck? (Takes off
running after the women with camera in hand)
Shin runs across again, screaming. Followed by the mob
of women... and Ryo.
Shin: Help me!! What did I do to deserve this?
Scene cuts back to hospital room.
Hiroshi: Are those guys fighting again?
Kyo: Yup. They really want the position.
Scene cuts back to the street. Tatchi and Kirin are
standing up. Shin runs across the screen again, his
shirt torn and in his polka-dot boxer shorts. Mob of
women run by, one women carrying pieces of Shin's
shirt, another with his pants.
Shin: AHHHHH!!! I'm getting tired!!
Everyone laughs at him.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
The four warriors are at dinner with Hiroshi and
Master Kyosuke. They are eating rice, and not with
the best of table manners. Finally, there is only one
helping of rice left. Ryo reaches for it, when his
hand is smacked by a bamboo sword.
Tatchi: Hands off, hentai, this rice is mine!
Tatchi takes the bowl of rice. Ryo whacks Tatchi with
his staff.
Ryo: Over my dead body!
Shin: That could be arranged, give me that rice.
Kirin: This rice belongs solely to the mighty Kirin!
Kirin takes the rice bowl and is about to eat it. Shin
punches him in the head and takes it.
Kirin: Unhand that at once you fiend!
All four dive into a battle. The rice is tossed,
grabbed, and passed around madly.
Hiroshi: Do they fight over everything?
Kyo: It appears that way. (Starts waving bottle at
them) Hey! Cut that out!
Hiroshi calmly reaches into the battle and pulls out
the rice. Ryo is in the middle of hitting Tatchi over
the head with his staff.
Hiroshi: Want some, grandpa? (Holds out the rice.)
Kyo: Nope, you go ahead.
Hiroshi eats some rice and makes a face.
Hiroshi: This rice is cold. Here you go, Furball.
(Throws the bowl of rice down to a little white cat,
who eats it.)
Furball: Meow!
The fighting goes on, oblivious of all other factors.
Hiroshi calmly stands up, wipes his face, and
wordlessly jumps into the battle. Scene cuts to
outside. Door opens and Ryo, Shin, Kirin, and Tatchi
fly outside and land on the ground.
Kyo: (Sweatdropping) Thank you. I was worrying that
they would destroy the house.
Hiroshi: They must be getting better, I'm actually
sweating.
Kyo: (thinking) *Hiroshi only fights them when they
are tired and weakened. At full strength they could
easily beat him. Ahh, what the hell..* (Takes another
drink)
Outside...
They all get up and look at the door.
Shin: You know what? We should kill that little kid.
Ryo: Yeah, then two of us will be able to train under
Master Kyosuke.
Kirin: Of course those two will be the benevolent
Kirin and the perverted one.
Ryo: Hey! I'm more than MERELY perverted, okay? I'll
have you know that when it comes to perversion I'm the
most serious man alive!
Shin: Yo, are we gonna take that from that arrogant
bastard and that perverted freak or what?
Kirin: Hold thy tounge, retched cur!!
Shin: Hey!! I ain't no retchd whatever you said!!
Kirin: Prepare yourself!!
Shin: We'll do it tag team style! I'm in first!
Kirin: I shall handle this situation and come to you
if I must perverted one.
Shin and Kirin advance to the middle of the yard.
Kick-ass battle music starts playing. Shin drops into
his stance and Kirin stands confidently.
Kirin: Thou shalt be punished! Prepare to defend
thyself!
Kirin charges to attack Shin. Punches at his head.
Shin dodges to the side effortlessly and jumps behind
Kirin, delivering a kick to the side of his head.
Kirin's head is knocked into the ground but he rises,
apparently unharmed. Kirin delivers several punches
and kicks, that are dodged by the smaller artist.
Shin suddenly falls over, clutching a lump on his
head, revealing Ryo with his staff behind him.
Tatchi: Hey! That's cheating!
Ryo: Cry about it Fem-Boy.
Shin gets up and starts blocking and dodging punches
from Kirin and staff strikes from Ryo. He begins to
sweat heavily.
Shin: Get in here Tatchi!!
Tatchi: That would be cheating. I refuse to lower
myself to their level.
Shin: I can't dodge these guys forever!!
Shin dissapears just as Ryo strikes with his staff,
hitting Kirin instead. Shin reappears beside Tatchi
and tags him.
Shin: Your turn.
Tatchi pulls out his sword and jumps in. He lands a
strike with his bamboo sword on the still staggering
Kirin, knocking him over. Kirin staggers back to his
feet. Ryo swings his staff at Tatchi, hitting him in
the back of the leg. Tatchi backflips over Ryo and
knees him in the kidney. Kirin runs at the swordman.
Tatchi turns in time to recieve a punch in the gut by
Kirin, staggering him. Ryo hits Tatchi in the other
side with his staff. Kirin lands a punch to the jaw
and a kick to the stomach.
Tatchi: Have you no honor? This is an unfair battle.
Shin: To hell with honor. Here I come!
Shin jumps in just as Ryo raises his staff to strike.
Ryo is tackled by Shin.
Shin: You're not supposed to be in here you cheater!
You're going to the penalty box!!
Ryo gets up in time to get his staff kicked away and
punched in the jaw. Shin jumps back to his corner.
Meanwhile, Tatchi has recovered and is standing in his
fighting stance. He exchanges blows with Kirin,
blocking all punches with his sword. Hiroshi, who is
watching, yawns.
Hiroshi: This is boring.
Hiroshi stands up and casually sends a flying kick to
Kirin's head. Kirin flys into a tree, hitting his
head, hard. He falls down, unmoving. Ryo jumps in,
grabs Hiroshi and throws him at a boulder. Hiroshi
rebounds off the rock with his feet and flys back at
Ryo. Ryo dodges the flying kick, but Hiroshi lands on
his feet. Tatchi readies his sword and jumps at
Hiroshi, striking several times. Hiroshi barely
dodges all of them and manages a kick to Tatchi's
groin, doubling him over. Shin sneaks up behind
Hiroshi and kicks him in the side, sending him flying
into a rock, which he rebounds off of and lands,
slightly staggered. Shin picks up a big boulder and
throws it at Hiroshi.
Hiroshi: Oh yeah?
Hiroshi uses the same open palmed attack as before,
disintegrating the rock and flinging Shin into a tree,
which falls down into the next yard. Cut to the other
yard.
Old Man: Ahhh... Mango juice!!
Old Man is abruptly cut off as the tree hits him and
shatters the bottle of juice. Cut back to the battle.
Shin is on the ground, out cold. Ryo punches down at
Hiroshi, who dodges it and kicks Ryo into the air. Ryo
flies out of sight. Tatchi is still rolling around on
the ground, moaning and clutching his manhood. Kirin
somehow manages to stagger to his feet.
Kirin: (Rubbing his head) That's it! I'm gonna teach
you a lesson, you little punk!!
Hiroshi: (Stares at Kirin) *He's not speaking in third
person!! It must have been the blow to his head!*
Kirin: *Ahhh.. the bastard's dropped his guard!*
Prepare to die!!!!!
Kirin runs at Hiroshi and punches. Hiroshi manages to
dodge it, but gets pulled into a belly-to-belly
suplex. Hiroshi rolls and staggers to his feet. Kirin
sinks to his knees and passes out from sheer exaustion
with a large bump on his head.
Meanwhile, in east Tokyo, Ryo is running full speed
back towards the dojo while dodging cars and people.
Ryo: *I don't know what that brat's problem is, I just
wanna feel up his cousin... oh well, anyone who gets
between me and women...*
Back at the dojo, Shin has regained his senses and has
assumed his battle stance. He dissapears for a second
and reappears in front of Hiroshi, diving at him.
Hiroshi brings his knee up to connect with Shin's jaw.
Shin lands and is out cold again. Tatchi staggers to
his feet, using his sword to stablize himself.
Tatchi: I ain't through yet.
Tatchi attacks with renewed strength and manages a few
hits before he too uses all his energy. He falls to
his knees and is kicked into unconciousness as well.
Hiroshi sighs and looks at the fallen warriors.
Hiroshi: Well that's all of them.
Ryo: Not exactly little man!! I'm baaaack!
Hiroshi: I thought I got rid of you.
Ryo: Better luck next time kid. Take this!
Hyyyyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!
Ryo attacks Hiroshi with a speed that puts anyone to
shame. Hiroshi manages to block very few of the
raining punches and kicks. Hiroshi staggers backward
into a defensive position.
Ryo: Let's end this now ok? I want to have enough
energy to get to your cousin.
Ryo tosses out several grenades. Hiroshi mangages to
flip back and away from the blast. Ryo, however, is
too tired and is hit by his own attack.
The ground explodes and a huge crater is formed with
an unconcious Ryo in it. Hiroshi falls to his knees.
He looks pretty beat up and is breathing hard while
struggling to stay concious.
Hiroshi: *Wow! I've never taken such a beating. Those
guys are much stronger than they used to be.*
The next morning everyone wakes up in the dojo. They
seemed to have fully recovered but they are still
depressed with the fact that they lost.
Shin: So damn close.
Kirin: Too true.
Ryo: Whatever. The kid's not my focus anyway....
hehe...
Tatchi: We won't lose again.
Shin: You remember?!
Tatchi: Remember what?
Kyo walks into the room with a huge tray of food.
Everyone's mouths water. Kyo serves the food.
Shin: Where's Hiroshi?
Kyo: Asleep. You boys did quite a number on him. He
barely made it into the house before passing out. You
boys are a lot stronger than when you first arrived.
Also, I'm going to train Hiroshi harder. He seems to
have been slacking off a bit.
Shin: (sarcastically) What _was_ he thinking?
Ryo: (evilly) Yeah. We'll beat some sense into him.
Kyo: Perhaps...
All: All right. Pay back time!
Shin: You do realize that I came closest to beating
the kid.
Kirin: Yeah, right!! The amazing Kirin came closest to
making an end to that delinquent little kid!!
Tatchi: What are we talking about again?
Kirin: Kirin is the greatest warrior of all time!! He
is the king of martial arts!
Ryo: (Whispers to Shin) I think it's about time for
this king to be dethroned.
Shin nods silent agreement. They both get evil grins
on. Kirin is still ranting about how great he is.
Shin: (Whispers to Ryo unintelligably, Ryo nods)
Ready, and... NOW!!
Ryo is seen as a blur going to the drawer.
Kirin: What are you--
Shin: Prepare to die you arrogent piece of crap!!!
Shin jumps at Kirin, holding both of Kirin's arms
behind his back.
Kirin: Curse you you fi--
Kirin is cut off by Ryo putting the duct tape on
Kirins mouth. Ryo then proceeds to wrap it all around
Kirin's head until only the eyes are seen.
Kirin: Mmmmpphhh.. Mph!!
They all pile outside and proceed to fight savagely.
Kyo: Boy did they recover fast. They're already
fighting at almost full strength. You feel like
joining in?
Hiroshi: Oh man. I feel like I've been run over by a
freight train. What? You want me to fight them? Are
you crazy?
Kyo: Would that you had their endurance.
Hiroshi: Yeah, well I took 'em all on at once.
Kyo: They also haven't trained under me for seven
years.
Hiroshi: If I was as old as they were, I'd take them
out back and beat them within an inch of their
miserable lives.
Kyo: Well, you're not. So get yourself into the dojo
and train harder than you've ever trained before
because these guys are going to pass you up in skill
if you don't dig down and train. I'll be there in a
minute.
Hiroshi: Okay Grandpa. (Exit)
Kyo: *Man, these guys are really improving fast.
It'll be tough to decide which one is the best. Maybe
I could break tradition and take them all. No, that
would violate tradition. I'll just have to decide.*
Scene cuts to the fight just as all of them are
beating each other.
Several weeks later...
It was a peaceful Monday morning. Of course that peace
lasted only until the sounds of bitter combat could be
heard from a certain dojo. They were at it again. Shin
and the others woke up at 5 am to practice. Now Kyo
had woken up and was watching them fight.
Kyo:* They do this every morning since they arrived.
They must really want me to train them...*
Master Kyo's thoughts were interrupted by a loud
explosion followed by several yells. Kyo aproaches the
four fighters.
Kyo: How old are you boys?
Tatchi: 16... I think.
Ryo: 16
Kirin: Kirin is 17.
Shin:(looks at the ground) I have no idea.
All: Nani?!
Kyo: You don't know when you were born?
Shin: Nope. I never had birthdays. I spent my entire
childhood training.
Kirin: Oh.
Tatchi: Is there anyone who might know? Your parents
maybe?
Shin's eyes narrow and he glares at Ryo.
Shin: (sharply) My parents aren't alive anymore.
Tatchi: Sorry
Kyo: Never mind. Have any of you been to school?
Tatchi: A little.
Shin: No.
Ryo: What's that?
Kirin: Unnecessary.
Kyo: Well then. I'll have to send you to the high
school.
Everyone's jaws drop.
Shin: W-what?
Ryo: School? You mean like... normal people?
Tatchi: Oh man.
Kirin: Kirin does not need schooling. Kirin is a
martial artist.
Shin, Ryo and Tatchi: Yeah! We ain't goin'.
Kyo: If you don't go, I won't train you. Besides, Ryo,
there are plenty of girls there.
Ryo: (immediatly)Race you guys to school.
Shin: You're on.
All 4 of them rush off towards the school. While Kyo
watches them.
Kyo: I doubt that was a very good idea, but it'll keep
down the damage around here.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Shin: I wonder what this new school is going to be
like.
Ryo: I hope it has lots of girls.
Shin: Figures you'd say that. That's just what I don't
need.
Kirin stops suddenly, looking at a large tank being
polished by a man in military garb with a flat top.
Tatchi stumbles into the suddenly unmoving Kirin.
Kirin: Watch where thou art going, cur!
Tatchi: You stopped!
Shin: Now guys, we don't have to fight... oh, wait a
minute, yeah we do!
Kirin: Be silent, knave, thou wilt have thy turn after
Kirin the Great deals with this pest.
Shin: Who are you calling a knave?
Tatchi: Who are you calling a pest?
Ryo: Oh boy! A fight!
Tatchi: Shut up, hentai.
Ryo: Make me, Fem-boy.
They all jump into a huge brawl. Ryo and Tatchi are
clashing staff and sword when Kirin grabs Shin by the
waist and throws him into a wall. Shin rebounds off
of the wall and back at Kirin, fist glowing with ki.
Kirin is knocked directly into the tank. The man
looks down at Kirin as he gets up, then at the dent in
his tank.
Man: You... dented my tank!! I just waxed it!
RRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!! (face turns red,
steam out of ears)
They all stop.
Ryo: What's he talking about?
Man: Gunner! Get into the tank!
The man jumps into the tank, followed by a kind of
skinny guy, also in military garb.
Man: Gunner! Man the overhead machine gun! I'll take
control of the main cannon!
Gunner: Sir!
Meanwhile, The others have resumed their fight,
heedless of the twenty ton Leopard swiveling to face
their direction.
Man: Preparing to fire the main gun!
There is a flash of light as a shell flies at the
warriors.
Tatchi: What the...
They all dive out of the way as a shell detonates in
their midst.
Man: Damn! Gunner! Take them out!
Gunner: My pleasure!
Gunner swivels the machine gun toward Ryo and begins
firing. Ryo dodges the stream of bullets and runs
along a wall with the stream of bullets following.
Shin and Tatchi hit the deck as the stream passes over
them. The stream continues to follow Ryo as the others
prepare to attack.
Ryo: What the hell is your problem?!
Ryo jumps at the tank, flipping and spinning in mid
air. He lands a perfect flying kick to Gunner's jaw.
Gunner flies off to the side. Ryo jumps off the tank
and ,pulls out handfuls of grenades, packed into bras.
He rebounds off a wall back toward the tank, tucking
into a flip.
Ryo: Take this!!!!
Ryo drops the bra bombs right next to the tank and
there is a huge explosion. The tank barrel rolls once
as a result of the explosion and stops. Ryo is
grinning maliciously.
Man: Damn! Lost my gunner and my new wax job in one
shot! I'll see that they all pay dearly!
The main gun swivels and fires three times. All of
them manage to avoid the blasts, but Tatchi is a
little singed. The gun swivels to face Tatchi. A
shell is realeased. With lightning speed, Tatchi
unsheathes his sword, jumps at the tank, and,
impossibly, cuts the shell in half. The two halves
hit a building and explode. Another shell hits at
Kirin's feet, and he is flung back into a wall.
Kirin: That does it, thou hast angered the mighty
Kirin Oda for the last time!!
Kirin leaps at the tank, only to be pummeled back by a
shell to his chest. (Yes, a full tank shot, in the
chest.)
Shin: *Looks like it's up to me.* Hey! Tank guy! Yeah
you! Where the hell do you get off attacking me like
that?!
Shin picks up a rock and throws it at the tank. The
man turns red with anger.
Man: Take this!!
Another shell is fired.
Shin dodges the blast easily. He jumps in front of
Ryo and knocks him into next week. He reaches into
Ryo's shirt and pulls out a double handful of
grenades. He drops the panties that came with them
and hooks the grenades to his belt. He jumps straight
up, and bounces off the wall straight at the tank.
Shin: BURNING KNUCKLE!!
Shin directs the Burning knuckle at the hatch,
knocking it off of its hinges. Shin swiftly drops the
grenades into the hatch and jumps off. The man looks
at the grenades for a second before madly scrambling
to get out of the tank. Just as he leaves the tank
the explosion sends him flying. The tank is still
whole, but not in too good shape. The man staggers to
his feet in front of a sneering Kirin.
Man: How dare you!!
>From nowhere, he pulls out a pair of automatic assault
rifles and begins spraying bullets at everyone. Kirin
calmly disarms him. The principle pulls out a pistol
and fires about ten times into Kirin's chest. Kirin
takes that as well and hits the man in the stomach
with the handle. He stands up and sees the others
staring at him.
Principal: How...
He is cut off as Kirin punches him over the horizon.
He flies toward the horizon, followed by the tank.
Kirin walks back to them, picking badly dented bullets
out of his shirt. He pulls a huge metal plate out
from under his shirt and tosses it away. No
explanation offered. (Deal with it.)
Ryo: So... where were we?
Kirin: Oh yes. Kirin had you all writhing in the
crushing grip of defeat.
Shin: Here we go again...
They jump into the fight again, heedless of the fact
that they were just attacked. Eventually they make
their way to the school...
-------------------------------------------------------
Well that's it. If you reply to this, please send a
CC to barrett326@yahoo.com. Later!
Ryo out.
=====
"You lose more in life by holding back. Carpe Diem!!!"-Ryo-
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