More ideas. This will be the last post on this subject. You

know the drill... Use 'em if you like em. I'm a big proponent

of 'Open Source', so I'm open sourcing my fanfic ideas. I'd

like to know if you use 'em, tho.





Saber Marionette - "The New Marionette"



"I'm the most important person on the planet, right?"



    Baiko and Tamasaburo would have wilted under their

mistress's gaze if they had more advanced emotional circuitry.

As it was, both marionettes were reading Lorilei as a

potential threat, and both were struggling to keep from going

into combat mode.



    "Hai, Lorilei-dono," Baiko said in the flat emotionless

tone she used when fighting enemy robots. Her emotional

processor was programmed for as wide a variety of feelings as

her original engineers could simulate. This meant that she had

quite a range of amusement and irritation, and only slightly

less range of protective and destructive feelings. While she

still felt very protective of the young woman in front of her,

her amusement register was completely empty.



    Simply put, she was unsure of how to behave around

Lorilei when the woman was upset.



    "Well I'm going crazy penned up in here!" Loreilei

complained, her arms waving angrily at the domed garden

barrier. "Your 'most important' is going to be an insane 'most

important' if I don't get sunshine, recreation, and human

interaction!!!"



    Tamasaburo flinched back from the woman's flailing arms

out of a desire to keep Lorilei from accidentally injuring

herself. As was her wont, Lorilei misinterpereted the action

and dropped her shoulders.



    "I'm sorry, Tamasaburo-chan. I didn't mean to say that

you're not human..."



    "I am a marionette," the violet-haired android

protested. "I don't have any pride to wound, Lorilei-dono."



    "I know. That's part of the problem, I think. I have

perfect guardians who guard me even from myself. I'll

compromise with you. If you two will arrange *something* for

me so that I can get out a little more, then I'll make it so

that you can understand my feelings better."



    "What would you have us do, Lorilei-dono?"



    "I don't know," she said in a slightly manic tone.

"Build me an amusement park? Make me bullet-proof so that I

can go outside?"



    The woman turned and strode back to the palace entrance,

leaving the confused marionettes behind her.



    Tamasaburo shook her head in electronic confusion. "She

is most..."



    "Willful," Baiko finished for her companion. "It is the

nature of humans to have human company, however. Lorilei's

health and saftey is important, but the degree of safetey may

indeed be affecting her health."



    "Surveillance, then," Tamasaburo said.



    "Perhaps. And disguise," Baiko ammended.



    For once, Tamasaburo had not anticipated her companion's

thoughts. "Explain."



    If Baiko could have smiled, she would have been grinning

from ear to ear.



* * *



    What met the two marionettes when they went to explain

their plans to their mistress a few hours later was not what

they expected. Lorilei had tied her hair back and was kneeling

over a rug-sized diagram of a horrendously complex logic

circuit. Pencil in hand, she was making minute changes to a

small section of the diagram.



    "Lorilei-dono--"



    "It's the original specification for the maiden

circuit," Lorilei answered, careful not to scuff the diagram

with her knees as she moved around, "from before when Foust

and Iyesu made my concepts work in reality. I thought it had

been lost when the Mesoptamia self destructed, but it was

stored in a burst transmission packet that was sent out just

before the ship released--"



    She stood and walked over to another part of the

diagram. She made one minor pencil mark and returned to her

previous location. "--Lime, Cherry, and Bloodbery's mature

maiden circuits. It had a lot of my personal files in it. I

think Mesoptamia was trying to apologize for holding me

captive. Along with the construction data I managed to

retreive when I rebuilt Tiger's maiden-circuit, this may just-

-"



    "Lorilei-dono--" Baiko interrupted. "We have a possible

solution."



    Lorilei looked up... into her own eyes. She blinked

once, not quite beleiving what she was seeing.



    "We had to requisition her from one of the commercial

marionette facilities," Tamasaburo explained, gesturing

politiely to the expressionless android standing between her

and Baiko. She had long, reddish-blonde hair and liquid green

eyes. She was wearing a duplicate of the outfit Lorilei had

on. Someone, Tamasaburo, Lorilei guessed, had even gone so far

as to paint the android's plastic fingernails to match hers.



    "Hello," Lorilei whispered.



    "hello, lorelei-dono," the marionette said in an

emotionless tone that was a fairly close match to the living

woman's voice.



    "Wow," Lorilei said in a quiet, stunned tone.



    "This is Decoy Unit One," Baiko introduced. "Or, Duo, if

you prefer. It will be her job to assume your appearance in

the palace while you are not in residence."



    "It will be her job to attend to your hobbies and

appearances," Tamasaburo explained. "She will maintain your

schedule, and be seen frequently from the palace windows and

balconies. She is equipped with a bio-masking feature that

will give false organic readings to almost all sensors. When

injured, Duo will display realistic wounds and bleed

convincingly. Only a complete dissasembly will prove that she

is a marionette."



    "On Earth," Lori answered hesitatingly, "One of the most

prized bodyguards was a man or woman who could look exactly

like the person they were protecting. This is... creepy,

but..." the girl whistled. "What's the catch?"



    "There can be only one 'Lorilei' at a time until the

clones are mature," Baiko explained. She held aloft a wrapped

package. Lorilei took it and unwrapped it to find a box of

electric-blue hair-dye and several boxes labled as 'permanent

body ink'.



    "So I have to become a marionette if I leave the

palace," Lorilei guessed.

    

    "We will aid you to draw accurate joints on your body,"

Tamasaburo said in a matter-of-fact tone. "You will join Otaru

Mamiya and blend in with his marionettes so that they can

protect you. While officially inside the palace, or if you

have to appear in public, you will wear a wig and concealing

clothes so that your appearance is as much like Duo's as

possible."



    "I really haven't given you two enough credit for your

creativness," Lorilei said. "This certainly isn't as safe as

keeping me locked up all the time, but it goes a long way.

Hmm... My hair hasn't been cut for centuries," she joked,

putting a nervous hand up to her long, reddish-blonde tresses.

"And marionettes don't have body hair."



    "We have already procured an electrolosys kit,"

Tamasaburo said. "We beleive that neither shaving or waxing

will be adequate for our purposes."



    "Lovely," Lorilei sighed. "I'm the only woman on the

planet and I *still* have to go through great pains to make

myself look pretty."



    "Lorilei-dono?"



    "Nevermind. It's all worth it if I can spend even a

single day outside the palace. Now where's this pain machine?"



----------------------------------------



Kodomo no Omocha - "The Bad Guys"



While it's not mentioned anywhere here, this was originally

intended to be a semi-parody story where Akito and Tsuyoshi

saved Sana from a crazed stalker.



[Scene: Brightly colored background. A polaroid photo of Akito

Hayama is tacked to it with a clear push-pin. 'Hayama' is

superimposed in cursive, neon-lit letters. The picture is of a

fairly unremarkable young man with dirty-blond hair and a

sullen expression. He's good looking in a non-descript sort of

way. What is worth mentioning are the leopard ears on his head

and spotted tail wiggling obscenely behind him.





Loud, cheerful music starts. It's a cuban mambo beat, but it's

been heavily mixed.]





Hayama (V.O.): Akito Hayama. 16 years old. That's me. I'm a

martial artist. Mediocre student. All-around unlikable

bastard. Heh...





[The photograph changes. It's an attractive young woman with

reddish-brown hair in an all-too-frilly idol-singer costume.

She's got one hand out to the crowd and the other hand on her

microphone. The lettering at the bottom reads 'Sana'.]





Hayama (V.O.): Sana Kurata. 15 years old. She's an actress and

pop signer who constantly infuriates both her fans and the

media by just not giving a damn about what anybody else

thinks.  She's been popular since before she was old enough to

know what it was, and acts like it. I don't think she'd notice

if someone told her she wasn't popular any more.





Sana (V.O.): Talent needs no audience.





Hayama (V.O.): Bullshit.  At any rate, Kurata is an annoying

brat of a person. She's hyper like she's been chewing expresso

grounds, and she's like that *all* the time. She's currently

starring on one of those idotic comedy-drama-soap shows about

life in a typical (as if) high school. All her fans think

she's the 'happy, cute' one on the show. I've met all the rest

of the cast and I think she's just the least annoying.





I don't hate her.





All her fanboys want to get in her pants. It makes me want to

go up to these guys and ask them if they're loony. Do they

really want that kind of aggrivation? Well... I'm one to talk.

None of them have a pair of Kurata's panties under their

pillow.





Tsuyoshi  (V.O.): Akito-kuuuunnn!!!!!





Hayama (V.O.): Did I say I did? No. I said they *didn't*. Big

difference there.... (Hayama begins whistling along with the

dance beat.)





[The photograph changes. It now displays a smilling rabbit-

like bat figure. 'Babbit' is displayed underneath.]



Hayama: .... (Still whistling)





[The photograph changes. A sharp dressed man in shades and a

dark colored suit is displayed. He's got a sulky 'cool' look.]





Hayama (V.O.): Ah, the pedophile.





Rei (V.O.): I'll have you know--





Hayama (V.O.): Rei Sagami, whipping boy to the stars. He's

Kurata's manager. He's also seriously self-abusive. I've had

my tounge in the girl's mouth and I can only stand her for a

few hours at a time. This guy spends *days* at a time coddling

her, making sure she has everything she wants, playing

audience when she's not actually on stage... He's even told

his girlfriend that he won't marry her until Kurata turns

eighteen because (Mimicking Rei:)'Sana is the most important

thing in my life right now...'





When she was little, he let Kurata pretend that he was her

boyfriend. He even sat in her bed until she went to sleep.





I wonder what happens when she turns eighteen?





Kurata-san (V.O.): That's when it becomes *your* job to take

care of Sana-chan.





Hayama: ....





[The photograph changes. It now displays an attractive middle-

aged woman. She's wearing a kimono and is holding a fan

demurely over her mouth, but has an otherwise serious

expression. In her hair sits a complete mockup of the Notre

Dame Cathedral, complete with a little squirrel pulling the

cord to ring the bells back and forth.]





Hayama (V.O.): Kurata-san. She's Sana's adoptive mother and a

professional writer. She's also a grade-A nutbar. I like her.





[The photograph changes. It now displays a smiling young man

with dark hair and thick glasses.]





Hayama (V.O.): Tsuyoshi Sasaki, sixteen years old. He's a nice

guy, but he's got a temper like Godzilla. His dad does, too,

although we don't see much of him anymore. Unlike his father,

Tsuyoshi's got me to knock some sense into him when he goes

overboard. His girlfriend's not afraid to let him know when

he's being a nut, either. I think he'll do okay.





And now... why don't we get started?





* * *



    "Tell me why you want to see this movie again?" Hayama

asked.

    

    "Sana-chan's got a cameo!" Tsuyoshi exclaimed, clutching

the magazine to his chest. He was standing on Hayama's bed and

beginning to dance around. Akito didn't like the look in his

eyes.



    "Tell me... How late were you up last night studying for

that test today."

    

    "Nani?" Tsuyoshi responded, his glasses glazing over and

seeming to reflect all light. He cackled insanely as he

flipped through the pages of the movie magazine.



    "When," Hayama restated, "did you get to sleep?"

    

    "Sleep? Sleep?" Tsuyoshi  began to giggle. "Sometimes

it's okay to go without sleep if you have an important

reason."



    "Lovely. Just lovely. Listen, Tsuyoshi. Why don't you

lay down and take a nap and we'll go to the movie tomorrow

afternoon. Okay?"



    "But... but... but..."

    

    "Tsuyoshi."

    

    Tsuyoshi's face began to appear panicked. "You know what

saturday afternoon crowds are like at movie theaters! It's

even worse because one this is playing at the mall!"

    

    Hayama couldn't help but wince. "Still... You haven't

had *any* sleep. You're gonna be a wreck, man."

    

    "I already told Aya and Sana that we were going,"

Tsuyoshi pulled his trump.

    

    "Shit."

    

    "HAHAHAHAHAHA! Gonna see the movie! Gonna see the movie!

Gonna see the movie!"

    

    "Shut up and let me think," Hayama commanded. Tsuyoshi

continued to dance wildly.

    

    The fact of the matter was that between the four of

them, Tsuyoshi was the only one that could drive yet. Kurata

usually had her manager to drive her around and Aya's family

was well-off enough so that she could take cabs or have her

father's driver chauffer her around.  It was so uncool as to

be laughable to have an 'adult' drive you around, though, even

if he did work for you. Hayama rubbed his chin in thought. He

would be damned before he would let Sagami drive them around,

even if Kurata did have him wrapped around her little finger

and used him to floss her teeth.



    "Gonna see the movie! Gonna see the movie! I'm gonna sit

next to Aya and put my arm around her shoulder and let my

fingers geeennntttlllyyyy slide down her arm and--"



    *WHAMOO*

    

    Tsuyoshi stood groggily, peeling himself up off the

floor.

    

    "I said 'Shut up'. How on earth are you gonna drive us

to the mall like this?"

    

    Tsuyoshi stood and stared Hayama dead in the eye. Akito

could see every pulsing bloodshot vein.



    "I'll be... just... fine..." Tsuyoshi declared. "Dan-

Dee-RIFIC!"

    

    "Wonderful. Just... get ready then. I'm gonna make a

call."

    

    As Tsuyoshi began to dance again, Hayama shook his head

and pulled out an oddly colored pager.



Babbit: It's Barrucha! It's a vibrating pager. It slices! It

dices! It juliennes! Maybe he's going to call Sana-chan?



    Hayama turned forward, addressing the fourth wall. "And

let her know that I've got no ride? She'd have Sagami pick me

up. No thanks!" He pushed a few of the translucent button in

sequence and then held down on the large white one.



* * *



    At the studio for 'Classroom Confidential', Rei Sagami

began to tremble. They he began to shake violently. To his

credit, though, his shades managed to stay on.



    "Are you ill, Rei-kun?" Zenjirou-sensei, who was now an

executive producer for 'Confidential', asked.



    "N-n-n-n-o-o-o-o, I-i-i-i'v-v-v-v-e-e-e-e g-g-g-g-o-o-o-

o-t-t-t-t a-a-a-a c-c-c-c-a-a-a-a-l-l-l-l."

    

    "Oh. That's nice."

    

    "T-t-t-t-h-h-h-h-a-a-a-a-n-n-n-n-k-k-k-k-s-s-s-s f-f-f-

f-o-o-o-o-r-r-r-r a-a-a-a-s-s-s-s-k-k-k-k-i-i-i-i-n-n-n-n-g-g-

g-g." Rei vibrated over to the door of the studio and through,

under the red 'quiet' light. Outside, the vibrating stopped,

Rei fliped out his cell-phone without missing a beat.



    "Rei des. What do you need, Akito-kun?"

    

* * *



    "Tsuyoshi told Sana and Aya that we'd be picking them up

to go to the movies tonight," Akito spoke into the mouthpiece.

    

    "Okay," Rei's staticky voice responded. "I'll try to

hurry the taping along then. It's almost done. Anything else?"

    

    "Change of plan. *You're* going to be dropping them both

off at the Sakura Mall at seven 'o clock. Capice?"



    "Well... I was kind of planning to go out with Asako-

san--"

    

    "The tabloids might really appreciate a glance at a

certain photo of you and Asako at her apartment last weekend."

Hayama noted quietly. Nothing but the static hiss of cellular

noise greeted his threat. "Understood, Sagami?"



    "H-hai."

    

    *click*



    "I don't really have a photo of Sagami bonking Asako. I

probably wouldn't even send the photo in if I did. I'm certain

they're doing it, though, and I know that Sana was bitching

all last week about being stuck at home all weekend because

'Rei was missing'. Two and two equals a bit of blackmail,"

Hayama admitted to no one in particular. "Works for me." He

turned and began to yell. "Tsuyoshi!"



    "Right here, boss! Wheee!!!!" Tsuyoshi announced from

right behind him, saluting vigorously. Thrown off balance from

the vigorous arm motions, his eyes began to spin and he began

to wobble on his feet.



    "What do we need to do before we go out?"

    

    "Well..." Tsuyoshi began to count on his fingers. "We

need snacks for the movie. We need to get changed. We need to

go over to my house and get the car..."



    "Lovely. " Hayama looked down at his forearm. "It's

6:45. We've got forty-five minutes to get dressed, bike to

your house, get the car *IF* your mom will let us have it, go

shopping and get to the mall. Is that it?"



    "Hai!"



    "We're gonna die," Hayama noted somberly as he led his

friend away. "If we don't die in the car wreck, then Sana's

gonna kill us for being late. It's that simple."



    "Warp Nine, Mister Scott!" Tsuyoshi declared. Then he

fell over, his dizzyness finally getting the better of him.



    "C'mon," Hayama commanded, scooping a bundle of clothes

out of his dresser as he passed. "I'll dress in the car."

    

* * *



    As the taping session was breaking up, Sana scampered

off the stage.

    

    "Wasn't I great, Rei-kun?"

    

    "You were wonderful as always, Sana-chan!"

    

    "Aren't I, though? HAHAHAH!"

    

    "Listen, Sana," Akito suggested. "I just spoke to Akito

and--"

    

    "I'm terrific! Nananko-san said that I was a shining

star today! I was just plain incredible!"

    

    "Sana, Akito said that--"

    

    "I am soooo great!" Sana declared, spinning on her toes.



* * *



    "Okay. You drive and KEEP YOUR EYES ON THE ROAD. I'm

gonna change clothes."



    "Haiii!"



------------------------------------





Slayers - "Mazoku City"



Dolphin's Mazoku are out to kill Lina and her friends and are

setting up traps all over. Since they are essential to his and

Zelas Metallium's plans, Xellos relocates the group to a city

at the north pole where Dynast and Zelas are in the process of

creating a race of 'humanized' mazoku. This quickly got quite

a bit darker than I cared for. I have a few other Slayers fics

on my hard drive that I still write on from time to time, but

I think I'm exhausted on this one.



    Zelgadis jerked awake at the sound of a knock at the

door of his chambers. Chagrined that he had fallen asleep at

the table, the chimera wiped a trail of drool from his chin

and loosened his sword in its scabbard.



    "Come in," he intoned emotionlessly, ready to strike.



    When he saw the black blurring, he was already in

motion.



    "Hello, ZelgadURK!"



    "What are you doing here?" Zelgadis demanded of the

Mazoku preist. He held Xellos against the the door with his

sword across his throat.



    "Not happy to see me, Zel-kun?" Xellos eeped.



    "Have you come to gloat over your handiwork, Mazoku?"



    "I'm getting some *really* negative vibes, Zelgadis," he

said, pushing the sword aside with his fingertips. "I take it

the quest didn't go well?"



    "You'd know, wouldn't you?" Zel accused.



    Xellos's usually bulletproof smile began to falter. "No,

I wouldn't. I think you better start from the beginning."



    Zelgadis never saw the other man move, but suddenly,

Zel's sword was stuck vibrating in the wooden floorboards. He

jerked back, as Xellos moved forward to inspect the book lying

on the table. "I take it that the tome didn't contain a cure

for your condition?"



    Zelgadis shook his head, growling in anger. "How can you

be so cold when Lina and Amelia were hurt because of you?"



    Xellos gently set the tome down. "That's not right."



    Zelgadis hated to admit it, but the preist's expression

chilled him to the bone. "You better beleive it's right. Lina

was stabbed and Amelia... Amelia..."



    "Take me to them," Xellos commanded. His smile had

dissapeared and his eyes had narrowed in rage.



    Blinking in surprise, Zelgadis nodded and led the preist

from the room. He found Amelia and Lina in their room, still

sleeping quietly.



    Lina woke almost instantly at the intrusion, and sat up

in bed. "Xell-*HOFF*" she coughed, with a wet, tearing sound.

Zelgadis winced, seeing the blood on her hands after she

sheilded her mouth during the spasm.



    Xellos put a finger to his lip and pulled out an odd

looking device. Lina had seen something similiar in Zelgadis's

pack before. He put the small end in one ear and the other

end, whick looked like a tiny drum, on Lina's chest just below

her exposed collar bone.



    Waking at the sound, Amelia looked curiously over at the

spectacle of an uncomfortable Lina being examined.



    "Deep breath, Lina," Xellos commanded.



    Lina breathed in deeply, wincing at the tearing feeling.



    With a clinical detachment, Xellos unbuttoned the two

top buttons on Lina's pajama top and nudged the stethoscope

lower. "You were stabbed here?" he asked, pointing to a spot

on the top of Lina's left breast. "Again."



    Lina nodded and sucked in another deep breath.



    Xellos moved the stethoscope to Lina's back and gestured

for her to take another breath. He made the device dissapear

and looked seriously at Amelia and Zelgadis. "There's still

bleeding in the top part of her lung," he explained. "She's

slowly filling up with fluid. He pointed at a spot just below

Lina's shoulder. "You should concentrate healing spells here,"

and another spot just below her breast, "And here."



    "Mister Xellos?" Amelia asked, concern showing on her

face.



    "You were injured as well," he said. Grimacing angrily,

he put a gloved hand on her stomach, and slid it down till it

was just above her crotch. Amelia blushed deeply, but was

reassured by the preist's gentleness.



    "Who did this?" Xellos asked in a quiet tone.



    "It was me, Xellos," Lina answered, holding her chest

where he examined it. "They had crossbows aimed at us and--"



    Xellos held up his hand, cutting her off. "This was

*not* what I intended," he stated darkly.



    "What do you mean, Xellos?" Lina demanded weakly. "You

sent us into a deathtrap!"



    "That's the bad part," Xellos answered. "It wasn't

intended to be. You were *supposed* to have a nice, diverting

quest while I was busy egaging in 'Mazoku Politics'."



    Lina shuddered, having trouble keeping the strength to

stay upright.



    "So you're alleging that you *didn't* sell us out?"

Zelgadis demanded incredulously.



    "No, I *didn't*. I may know who did," Xellos whispered.

"Interested, Zel-kun?"



    "Yes," Zelgadis answered, checking his sword. "If for no

other reason that to kill you when your story falls apart."



    "You know what to do, Amelia?"

    

----------------------------------------



Bubblegum Crisis/Evangelion - "Magical Princess Evangelia"

    

Essentially, NERV has somehow missed 2nd impact and is working

with boomer-sized Eva's in megatokyo. Rei, Asuka, and Shinji

all turn into magical girls.



    "So what do you have for me?"



    Non-chalantly, half-way paying attention to the idiot

gameshow on the barroom television, Sylia Stingray sipped her

drink. She crossed her legs, careful not to disturb her bored,

yet elegant visage.



    "Something new, actually," Fargo said, taking a long

draw of his beer. "Not something you may be interested in, but

the price is right."



    "Oh?"



    "What do you know about NERV?"



    "UN para-military force," Sylia replied. "Although it's

more of a paranormal research facility, if I'm correct. It was

created a few years after the Kanto Quake to investigate

possible paranormal causes for the quake. From what I've

heard, they're a bunch of religious nuts hiding in some cave

on the outskirts."



    Fargo laughed. "Apparently, our friends at GENOM don't

think so."



    "This isn't a GENOM contract, is it, Fargo?" Sylia asked

with just a hint of irritation in her voice.



    "Hardly. GENOM apparently doesn't care about NERV

itself, but the research that is underway in NERV's

facilities. If my sources are to be beleived, GENOM is in the

process of trying to 'appropriate' some really disturbing bio-

mechanoid research."



    "Boomers?"



    "No. Something entirely different." Fargo's expression

was troubled. "The way I understand it, it's more like bio-

mechanoid based battlesuits. A third party is interested in

keeping NERV research out of GENOM's hands until NERV is able

to take care of itself."



    "And this 'third party'?" Sylia asked, stirring her

drink.



    "You probably haven't heard of them. I hadn't. They call

themselves 'SEELE'."



    For some reason, Sylia's stomach went sour. She sat her

drink down and contemplated the uneasy feelings. "And what is

SEELE's bid?" she finally asked.



    "Five-hundred thousand plus projected expenses. That

much again as a completion bonus."



    "Wow." Even Sylia was shocked at the figure. "That's

quite a bit."



    "I certainly thought so," Fargo murmured. "It would also

be interesting to see what GENOM would do if they actually had

a real competitor in the bio-mechanoid industry." He pulled a

packet out of his vest pocket and slid it down the bar to

Sylia.



    "I'll give you my answer tomorrow," Sylia murmured.



    "No later than noon," Largo urged. "Our friends at SEELE

are working on a timetable."



    Sylia nodded and threw down a twenty to cover her tab.

She nodded once to Largo and made her way from the bar.



* * *



    Morning in MegaTokyo.



    People were rushing to and from various jobs, pushing,

shoving, clogging the expressways. The rail station was

especially crowded this morning, and Shinji Ikari was

beginning to lose his temper. He was neither very tall nor

very bulky for being fourteen, and was being bumped around

quite a bit in the early morning crush.



    "Hey... No!" he shouted, as his suitcase was almost

dragged away by a woman with three identical to it. He pulled,

eventually managing to liberate his meager wardrobe (and more

imporantly, his SDAT player) from the mindless lady.



    Once, he was almost pushed back inside a commuter train.

He finally managed to escape to the concourse and breathed a

sigh of relief.



    He pulled the photo out of his pocket again, and stared

intently at it for a few minutes. He grimaced, looking around

the station for the face on the photo. There was no one even

remotely matching the photo, so he began to make his way to

the front of the station.



--------------------------------------------



Nuku Nuku - "A housecat's delimma"



This just got too boring for me. Nuku Nuku is a very action

oriented story, and this was going to end up being a romance.

That's okay, but Atsuko-chan is just too exciting for that.



    Pain was not an unusual sensation. The cat had been

kicked, prodded, ocasionally crushed, and frequently starved.

The life of a stray is not a happy one, but, the cat had never

quite been this terrified. Besides the horrible, burning,

tearing feeling all through her, she was dizzy and kept

blacking out.



    It was if some horribly huge dog was chasing her, and

she just couldn't make her legs move to run away.



    There was a moderating sensation to the pain. Her nose

could smell chicken over the blood and fire, and there was

something nice and warm holding her. She wasn't sure, for the

disorientation, but it might haven been the person who gave

her chicken.



    She was terrified, but reassured by the boy's presence.

He was calling out in sadness, she could tell. What was he

calling out for?



    A cat's mind, you must understand, is very simple. There

is very little logic and what rational skills a cat's mind

does posses are overbalanced by instinct and emotion. A cat in

this position should be running away, trying to find a place

to hide from the scary noises and odd feelings. She should try

to wash away the wounds with her tounge. She should not lie

quietly in the arms of a strange person, just because it felt

so nicey warm and safe, even after all the pain and panic.



    The cat was feeling something that very few cats have

the opportunity to experience. It was a sensation that being

born on the streets had almost completely eradicated from its

being. The cat was happy, for the first time in it's all too

short life.



    It felt gratitude.



    Kysaku Natsume sighed as his son's tears spilled onto

the dying animal's coat. It's blood ran down his arms and up

into his sleeves.



    *This is all your fault, Akiko* he thought darkly,

looking over at the figure of the NK-1124 slumped over in back

seat of the demolised Land Rover. He snaped a match against

the tip of his thumbnail and lit the cigarrete.



    *You throw away my love, and then you throw away my

values, and *then* you throw away your son's happiness,* he

complained bitterly to himself. He looked back at the dying

tabby.



    Kysaku felt defiance well up inside him. His machines

would *not* be made to be killers. They would not be given

souls of death and horror that MHI and his *wife* wanted to

put inside them. He would destroy the android before...



    He looked back at the cat. It was still a kitten,

really. It's body was torn open, wasted beyond repair by a

stray bullet. It would probably die in a few minutes from the

blood loss, if nothing else. What did Ryuu have to gain?



    Kyusaku's mind spun dizzily for a few seconds, spinning

synth-flesh into dramatic shapes with the NK-1124 at their

core and something else... something entirely opposite what

his wife would want at the core of the NK-1124.



    "Ryu, buddy. I'm not much of a father, but this

Christmas, you're getting the best present a father ever

gave."



    "Dad?" Ryuunoske weeped.



    Kyusaku began to laugh. It was a mad laugh, full of

blasphemy and heresy. It was the laugh of a man who knew he

was sane even though the world thought he was not. It was, in

fact, a very typical mad-scientist laugh. "Oh, yes, Ryu. We're

gonna have the best Christmas ever."



    Two tanks of liquid nitrogen, a brain transplant, and a

quick software re-write later, the cat looked at her saviors

with new eyes. Her body felt strange, and there were odd,

scary sensations and even scary thoughts from all around.



    It was warm though. Just like the body of the boy her

arms were wrapped around. She could smell hot food, and knew

she was safe.



    Atsuko Natsume decided that she would never want to be

away from the boy ever again. Or Papa-san, either.





* * *



2 Years Later...

System WAKE-UP

"Miyaaaaaaahhhh..."



    Nuku nuku stretched and yawned as the world streamed in

through her eyes. Embarassedly, she realized she had fallen

asleep in class again, as the other students began to stream

past her. Miyaka-sensei would be mad, but Nuku-Nuku always

scored 100 percent, so Miyaka-sensei couldn't really complain.

Internal Diagnostic..... COMPLETE

Actuator Diagnostic..... COMPLETE

Organic Interface....... Running

    Nuku blinked and smiled as the familiar tingles ran

through her fingers and toes as Papa-san's computers made sure

her body was working properly. She took the opportunity to

wiggle her extremities cutely against the sensation. Papa-san

said that her fingers were really just metal and hyrdraulics

underneath a plastic polymer, but they felt real to Nuku Nuku,

and that was the important thing.



    Now, to the boys who stayed behind in the classroom, the

scene they saw was not of a cute little kitty-cat waking up

and arching her back and stretching her claws, no matter how

much Nuku-Nuku felt that was what it really was. They saw a

luscious young woman with bouncy mammaries arch her back

seductively over the back of her chair, curling her fingers

and toes in delight at the sensation. Every finely toned

muscle in her arms and legs stood out against her skin, and a

dangerous amount of skin showed as her top rode up on her

slender abdomen.

Organic Interface....... COMPLETE

    "Yah!" Nuku exclaimed gleefully, releasing the stretch

and springing back into a normal sitting position.



    One of her classmates simply passed out at the sight of

the bouncy spectacle.



    "I love you, Nuku Nuku-chan!" another called out.

Diagnostics Complete

Current Time is 15:33:04 TST

NK1124Reminder: Nuku Nuku owes Ryu-chan two cartons of tako-

yaki!



    "I like you, too, but Nuku Nuku can't play this

afternoon. Nuku Nuku has to get octopus puffs for Ryu-chan!"



    "Please don't leave us, Nuku Nuku!" Another young man

cried out.



    "Sorry! Ja!"



    "Who's Ryu-chan! Nooo... she has a boyfriend!"



    "Calm down, it's just her little brother. The science

teacher's kid, remember?"



    "Oh..."



    Nuku Nuku picked up her book bag and tromped happily out

of her classroom. She smiled warmly at everyone she saw, even

if they didn't smile back.



    She saw a group of girls whispering to each other by the

fountain in front of the school. Nuku Nuku had learned that

whispering meant that they wanted privacy, but privacy killed

the cat, so to speak. As a cat would rotate it's ears toward

an interesting sound, Nuku Nuku's tactical sensors folded out

slightly, almost, but not quite showing through her scarlet

hair.



    She listened in covertly, pleased at hearing a secret.

It was even about her! She wondered what the words they were

using meant.



    She waved and walked out the gates of the school, and

across the street to pick up Ryuunosuke.



    Ryuunosuke Natsume had become a study in careful

patience. Dealing with Nuku Nuku was like dealing with, well,

a cat. She did what she wanted with little regard for the

consequences. She was intelligent and moral, and was slowly

learning the ins and outs of human relationships, but that one

little facet remained utterly feline. Nuku Nuku had almost no

moral concept of cause and effect.



    Thus, he had carefully and repeated explained that,

although she *could* go faster than the traffic, people got

upset and made mistakes when they saw things that surprised

them. After two years, Nuku Nuku was just beginning to

understand that there was less property damage and personal

injury when she biked at a speed consistent with the posted

limit.



    Since she was calming down on the bicycle, Ryu had made

a special 'back seat' out of a luggage rack and some

motorcycle parts. It even had a seatbelt and foot rests. He

could (safely) sit back to back with Nuku Nuku as she made her

way through Tokyo freeway traffic.



    He could hear her squealing with delight as she passed a

Mercades on the shoulder. Smiling, he tightened his grip on

his book bag.



    "How was school today, Nuku Nuku?" he shouted over the

din of the freeway noises.



    "Great! Nuku Nuku made fish-cakes in Home Economics and

scored a 100 on my math test and had a really great nap in

chemistry class."



    "Heh... Wish it was that easy for me."



    "Ryu-chan?" Nuku nuku asked. "Nuku Nuku heard some girls

talking about me today and they used a word I don't know."



    "Hmm? What was it?"



    "Uhh... Oh yeah! What did they mean when they said

'Slut'?"



    Ryuunoske blinked, not beleiving his ears.



    "Are you... sure... that's what they said, Nuku Nuku?"

he asked seriously.



    "Mmm-hmm. They also said I was a 'tease'. I thought I

knew what that meant, but I don't ever tease anybody, do I?"



    Ryu exhaled heavily, the wind taking the breath easily

from his mouth. "This is kinda bad, Nuku. We might want to

wait until we get home."



    "Oh, Nuku Nuku hopes it's not too bad, Ryu-chan," she

giggled.



    Ryu let his eyes shut. *She has *no* idea.*





-----------------------------------



Sailor Moon - "San Francisco Senshi"



This was supposed to be a "What if the Senshi grew up in

California?" story, but once I got past the initial historical

fiction about the end of WWII, I discovered I just wasn't

interested in it any more. This contains some derogatory and

racist language, in character for this historical figures.





    Harry Truman was taking a short rest after the

conference. It had been grueling. He knew that the Russians

were going to be hardasses, but the French were being damned

antagonistic. Concession this, concession that.



    "You think they'd bloody damn well remember who just

pulled their entire country out of the shitter," he mused

aloud, taking a long draw off his pipe.



    He thought about the mechanics of that damned

'Controlling Authority' idea Stalin had come up with. He

couldn't help but feel that it was expansionist. Maybe if they

split Berlin, as well as the rest of the country, it could

work. Otherwise, it would leave Germany open to becoming a

de facto state of the USSR.



    Truman was about to stand and mention the idea to one of

his strategists, when a Secret Service agent approached him.

"You're wanted for an urgent meeting, Mister President."



    "Tell me that the Japanese have decided to surrender,"

Truman said, knowing that it wouldn't be the case.



    "I don't know sir. The agent said that this was

classified."



    "I'll be ready in just a second," Trumun said, jotting

down the settlement ideas on a note pad and sticking them in

his breast pocket.



    A few minutes later, the agent returned with another,

who was carrying a black leather satchel. Truman stood,

adjusted his glasses and shook the man's gloved hand. The

agent had short reddish brown hair and odd, piercing eyes.



    "Maxfield Stanton, NSA," the agent introduced himself.

"It's a pleasure to meet, you Mister President."



    "'No Such Agency', huh?" Truman suppressed a chuckle.

"What are you boys doing here?"



    "Well, sir," Stanton began, "it concerns a project that

Mister Roosevelt initiated. Are you familiar with project

'A'?"



    "I'm afraid not, Agent Stanton. Care to explain it to

me?"



    "I thought you might not have been told," Stanton

admitted. "Are you familiar with the work of Professor Albert

Einstein?"



    Truman listened. As Stanton explained, his eyes got

wider and wider.



    * * *



    "We have three targets and two weapons," Truman

summarized. "And the Japanese are ready to surrender?"



    "It concerns their honor system, sir," the secreatry of

state explained. "I think we're all very well aware that the

Japanese forces have not conducted themselves... ahem...

*honorably* during the occupations in China and the ***

peninsula. The Japanese mindset can't really accept that their

military is even capable of doing these things. Frankly, they

can all too well imagine any one else in the world doing it to

them, however."



    "Damn, and I thought the Nazis were were racist

bastards," Truman noted. "At least they'll admit they hate

everyone else. So what's this deal with the Emperor, then?"



    "Well, in exchange for a guarantee of the safety for the

Emperor and his family, and a promise that the Japanese

government will remain nominally sovereign during the American

occupation, they're willing to a surrender."



    "A conditional surrender." Truman shook his head. "Damn.

Damn. Damn. It's not going to look good if we cave to their

demands, but when you balance that against the loss of

life..."



    "The Russians are only a few years or *months* away from

reproducing the Los Alamos research, Mister President,"

Stanton warned. "If we fail to show our force now, the

consequences could be dire in Europe *and* Asia."



    Truman nodded in agreement. "General?"



    Across the room, Douglas Macarthur rubbed out the but of

a smouldering cigar. "The boys in Tactical have estimated

losses for a U.S. land invasion on the main island. The

numbers aren't good for us *or* them, Harry. Millions will die

on both sides. Damn Japs've been training their women and

children to fight off G.I.'s with sharpened sticks," Macarthur

shuddered in disgust. He lit another cigarette and pointed to

the chart above the table. "Bomb the shit out of the other two

cities.... Nagasaki and Hiroshima. We'll cripple their ability

to rebuild their Pacific Fleet *and* send a warning message to

Hirohito *and* Stalin. They'll probably surrender after we bomb

one city, but they'll *have* to surrender if we bomb both."



    "There is another option, Mister President," Stanton

argued. "If we were to bomb Tokyo, resistance in the rest of

the country would crumble."



    MacArthur shook his head. "You gotta know those Jap

bastards, Harry. They'll fight until they die or until the man

in charge tells them to quit. If you off their emporer, you

might as well have sent in troops rather than using the

device."



    Truman thought carefully for several minutes before

announcing his decision. "Okay, the show of force is

necessary. If we don't lay our cards down now, Stalin is going

to have bombers in the air by next Christmas. The Japanese are

beaten, but they've got to be made to realize it. Bomb

Hiroshima," Truman decided. "And then we'll solicit a complete

surrender. Let's let the bastards know that we're gonna take

out their beloved Tokyo and the Emporer if they don't. Do you

think they'll evacuate at that point, Mac?"



    Macarthur nodded.



    Truman grinned. "That way, they'll save face, we'll get

our show of force *and* no more imperial Japan fucking around

in the Pacific."



    "I'll see to it, Mister President," Macarthur said.



    Mafield Stanton grimaced. The Queen would not be happy

with these developments. Tokyo was *not* supposed to have a

warning before the Americans rained nuclear fire down upon the

city.



* * *



    Jiro Hino watched in horror as the buzzing sound of a B-

52 bomber filtered down from above.



    In one hand he held a torch. The sacred flame of the

Hikawa shrine could not be extinguished. Not even by a nuclear

explosion.



    He wept, and turned his eyes away as the flash lit up in

the far distance. From behind him, the Tsukino woman started

to cry again. There were others there in the little evacuee

camp he'd established.



    

----------------------------------------



Sailor Moon/Maison Ikkoku - "There Ain't No Justice".



Godai and the rest of the MI crew are dark generals, who take

advantage of the Sailor Senshi's lapse.





             ---------------------------------

            |  BORED SAILOR SENSHI NEED WORK  |

            |                                 |

            |     Inner Senshi need Crime     |

            |  Fighting or Monster Trashing   |

            |     work over summer break.     |

            |                                 |

            |      No crisis too big.      |

            |     No situation too small.     |

            |  No modelling agencies, please. |

            |           Japan Only.           |

            |                                 |

            |    We can work until Fall    |

            |    university enrollment!    |

            |                                 |

            |        Call 11-499-9876         |

            |                                 |

             ---------------------------------







    "I take it this is for real?" The inspector general

growled.



    The others in the room nodded.



    The inspector shook his head sadly. "Just what we need.

Another summer full of mayhem. I *was* hoping to retire next

year. I'll be lucky if I don't get my energy drained."



    "It may not be as bad as all that, Inspector Masuma," a

plain clothed man announced from the back of the room.



    "And you are?" Masuma demanded.



    "Yasaku Godite, Internal Affairs." The non-descript man

pulled a badge out from under the dark colored cardigan he was

wearing and flashed it at the inspector. "I'm here to

represent the Ministry's interests in what promises to be a

*very* interesting situation."



    "Lovely." The inspector plopped back in his swivel chair

at the head of the conference table. "Now we have to dance to

the Ministry's tune as well. Just lovely. Tell me, Godite.

What does the Minsitry want with the Sailor Senshi?"



    Godtie chuckeled, buffing his nails on the knit

cardigan. "Actually, we're interested in keeping them out of

trouble. While the 'monster' rampages two and three years ago

raised quite a fuss, there's been an interesting dearth of

them the last year or so. As you surely all know by now, no

one seems to be able to catch the Senshi on video or in

photos. We have, however, been able to build a rough character

dossiers of most or all the girls with eye-witness reports.



    "As you can see in the advertisment, most of them almost

undoubtedly just passed their entrance tests and graduated

from high school in their 'secret' identities."



    The inspector rubbed an his face in visible irritation.

"So what?"



    "As we can see from this add, we have between five to

ten very bored young ladies running around Tokyo at whim. What

differentiates them from any other young adults is the fact of

their incredible superpowers. The Ministry has also not been

able to discern the source of the powers, the identity of the

girls, or their ideology. Regardless of the fact that they've

apparently prevented multiple alien invasions, the Ministry

still considers them dangerous unknowns. We can't afford to

have lose cannons tearing up Juuban or any of the rest of

Tokyo at whim."



    Inspector Masuma nodded, Godite's speech beginning to

make sense.



    "Now from the ad, and from the dossiers, we beleive that

none of the Sailors are actively malicious. They're looking

for something to do. There have been no semi-credible reports

of monsters or aliens in the last year or so, so I think we

can rule out any more magical fights on the Tokyo Tower. I

think we all can breath a sigh of relief that the Senshi have

enough time to fill out a classified advertisement. The

important thing is to keep them busy."



    "And under Ministry control," Masuma rumbled, scratching

his chin.



    "And Ministry observation. Now, Minsitry intelligence

has given this a low priority, so if you would be so kind as

to give me a few of the particulars on this ad. Has anyone

checked the phone number?"



    One of the seargents stood from his chair. "The number

is registered through Tokyo Mobile Communications to 'Sailor

Jupiter'. We sent a couple detectives down to investigate.

Apparently, three girls in short sailor fukus entered their

Juuban office sometime yesterday and paid for the phone and a

year's contract in cash. The billing address for extra

charges they gave goes to a P.O. box, also in Juuban,

registered to 'Sailor Jupiter' with a home address in the

'Moon Kingdom' as well."



    "Real names and addresses are required to lease a post

office box," Godite reminded.



    "If *you* were leasing a box to a Sailor Senshi, would

you remember to ask for a real address?" the inspector asked.



    Godite nodded and shrugged defeat. "In fact, I bet the

Senshi were either counting on that, or had some way to ensure

it," he continued. "Does the TMC keep surveillance cameras in

its outlets?"



    "Yes," the seargent continued. "But the Senshi were

either expecting that, or have some kind of method of

preventing all cameras from working. The video tape shows

three girls in Sailor Fukus but the entire time the camera is

running, the picture is full of static, and fades out

completely every time one turns her face to the camera."



    "We haven't obtained video from the Post Office yet,"

Inspector Masuma continued for the seargent, "but if we did,

I'd be willing to bet that it's full of the same kind of

static.



    "You're probably right, of course. Okay," Godite clapped

his hands. "Let's see what we can do to keep Sailor Moon and

her merry band out of trouble this summer!"



    "What I'd really like to know," Inspector Masumi mumbled

under his breath, "Is what prompted them to take a risk like

this?"





* * *



    Two Weeks Earlier, five very bored young women were

sunning themselves in the Tsukino's back yard. They *could*

have laid out in the expanisve temple yard at Rei's temple,

but as the raven haired preistess was quick to point out, that

would leave their barely clad bodies open to Grandfather

Hino's ogling eyes.



    Deciding to risk a Supersoaker attack from Shingo, the

girls elected to meet at Usagi's for sunbathing instead.



    Ami was snoring lightly. Makoto was considering just how

much effort it would take to lift the physics book off her

chest to prevent a *really* odd tan-line.



    Rei was half way to dreamland herself. She was in an

extensive daydream that partially involved a repeat of Usagi's

histronics as she studied for the entrance exams, and a

fantasy of Rei standing over her with a whip, cruelly forcing

her to continue studying. If this were a lemon, Rei might have

gone further with that fantasy, but in truth it had been

painful for *all* of them, goading the meatball head to study.



    Makoto decided to make the effort to lift the book off

Ami's bikini clad breasts, only to discover that she was too

late to prevent a diamond shape light mark over the girl's

upper chest. She giggled and sat up to rub some more tanning

oil into her already bronzed skin.



    It all started, of course, with Minako and Usagi who

were cloud gazing. Now, this all would have gone differently

if Luna or Artemis were there. Said felines were curled up

together in a sunny spot on Usagi's bed, and therefore not

present to avert calamity. Ami was asleep, Rei was in a world

of her own, and Makoto could really care less about what was

about to be said. Mamoru would have prevented it, just because

he was a few years older and wiser. As it was, no one was

there to stop Usagi from mouthing those horrible words.



    All five girls' sun lounges were arranged in a circle,

with their feet pointed in so that they could talk. Minako and

Usagi were roughly across from eacother with Makakto next to

Minkao and the dozing Ami next to Usagi. Rei was working her

way up to thumbscrews and bamboo splinters in between the the

two blonde girls.

    

    "Wow, that one looks like Mamo-chan," Usagi sighed

dreamily.



    "I kinda thought it looked like my old boyfriend,"

Makoto seconded from across the circle.



    "Mmmm... and that one looks like an icecream cone,"

Minako visualized gleefully.



    "Boy, and ice cream cone does sound good about now,

huh?" Usagi shifted herself so that one of her ponytails

didn't pull.



    "Sure does," Minako agreed.



    "Hey!" Usagi pointed up at a fairly round cloud with a

little, almost square hole in it. "That one looks like a fifty

yen piece."



    Birds stopped chirping. The Takamoto's rotating

lawnsprinkler jammed up next door for no good reason.

Upstairs, Luna and Artemis awoke with a chill.



    "It does, doesn't it. I still like my ice-cream cloud

better," Minkao countered.



    In the dark Kingdom, Tanjite, whom you're not supposed

to know about yet, was having a *very* pleasant dream. It was

startlingly similiar to Rei's daydream.



    "Mmmm..." Usagi muttered.



    In Texas at that moment, a tornado touched down and

compleletly obliterated nine individual farmsteads.



    "I wish I had a few more fifty-yen peices," Usagi

lamented.



    In the Vatican in Rome, the Pope thought he saw the baby

Jesus weeping in the 'Mother and Child'.



    "I know what you mean," Minako egged her on. "All my

free money's going into my college fund right now."



    "Hmm..." Usagi wondered aloud. "I wonder..."



    Over Israel, two 747's very nearly colided.



    At the Tendou dojo, several miles away from the Tsukino

household, Genma Saotome broke the toothpick off in a square

of sweet bean jam.



    "Bad Omen," he muttered. Then he went to check on Ranma,

just in case.



    Back in the Tsukino's back yard, Usagi was staring hard

at her fifty yen peice cloud. Her little mind was churning

away. Her subconcious screamed away from the words that were

about to pour out of her mouth. In the Misato's yard, on the

other side of the fence, a flock of black birds took flight

out of an old willow.



    "I wonder," Usagi thought aloud. "If there's any way we

can get some extra money."



    No more hideous words had ever been spoken. They were

the same words that eventually led to the betrayal of Christ,

the fall of Rome, both World Wars, the 'Police Academy' Movies

and the public beta of Windows 98.



    "Maybe with our powers somehow," Usagi continued. "It's

been a while since we used them. Not since Galaxia invaded."



    And, being Usagi, she subconciously felt the need to

shove her foot down her throat to the knee, just to make her

point.



    There was no more talk of money that day mostly because

it was too warm for any of the girls to entertain any serious

ideas of voluntary work.



    Two days later, however, all the Senshi met at the

Hikawa Temple for a cookout. Hotaru and Doctor Tomoe were

there, as well as Haruka, Michiru and Setsuna.



    Doctor Tomoe and Grandfather Hino were doing the 'manly

men grilling manly hotdogs' bit. The closest Souichi Tomoe had

ever come to grilling before were the all the times he used

his bunsen burner to reheat his coffee. The closest

Grandfather Hino had come to grilling was the time he

accidentally singed his eyebrows off in the sacred flame.



    Setsuna was watching the two men with carefully masked

amusment.



    "Just like Cassius and Brutus the time they were

throwing the lamb roast for Ceaser. *sigh*" she could be heard

to say to herself. If you were listening.



* * *



C. Jones - guilty@furinkan.net

http://www.furinkan.net



Watashi ha ultra-relakusu!