Just general comments on the past three installments of this, since Part
One's the last one I read.... The twists and turns in the plot continue
to keep the story interesting. Writing-wise, it's very clean, and the
dialog-heavy style works well for what you're trying to do.
I do have a couple of character quibbles. Ukyo, considering her behavior
in stories like Secret Sauce and Cave of Lost Love, would not IMO be
this reluctant to use her contract on Ranma on moral grounds alone. It
might be more believable to have her suspicious of whether the contract
would do what it said, considering how it backfired for Shampoo. Also,
"it's happened, and there's nothing I can do about it now. I'm just
going to have to deal with it" doesn't seem like the right attitude for
Ranma to take. If he said something like "Don't worry about it, I'm
gonna find a way outta this mess" it would IMO be more natural while
amounting to pretty much the same thing.
Keep 'em coming! :)
Gary Kleppe
http://www.akane.org/gary/comics.html