>About time I got to this.
S'all right.
>> Le canard a la Pekin
>
>'The Pecking Canary'. Nice title. Ain't it great how five
>years of German
>has allowed me to translate the title so easily?
I am reminded of the old saying about a little knowledge being
dangerous. ^_- Of course, this simply does NOT apply to use of
Japanese in anime fanfic. *Shakes head firmly.* Nope, not at all.
^_^
>> The lunch rush had ended, and the best ramen house in
>Nerima stood
>> empty for the moment.
>
>Ironically, it was an 'International House of Pancakes.'
I hear their Super Soba omelets are quite popular... Just stay away
from the Jusenkyou syrup...
>> It had been a tough and long lunch. The persistence of the male
>> Japanese libido never ceased to amaze Shampoo, and
>she'd been forced
>> to bend three different pieces of rebar into pretzels,
>one each for
>> three different crowds, to get them to quit trying to pinch her
>> rear... or other parts best left unmentioned,
>
>like her grandmother's rear.
Oog. Let's not go there... Let's not even say that we did. ;)
>not that it would keep
>> them at bay for long. It wasn't good for business to
>pound on paying
>> customers, and running that gauntlet for three hours
>without release
>> had left her tense and irritable.
>
>Hopefully they at least tip well for the eye-candy. :)
:)
>> The tinkle of the front door bell
>
>'jingle' sounds better to me. I get the image of someone
>taking a leak when
>you say 'tinkle'
Ah, the demon of unfortunate word association rears it's horned
head.
>> "I can't BELIEVE he ate all THREE of them, and didn't
>leave ANY for
>> the rest of us!" Shampoo could hear Akane and two
>others sit down,
>> chairs scraping against the tiled floor.
>
>Well, Soun's a greedy bastard that way.
*BUZZ!* You have two more tries. Please insert token for additional
playing time...
Somewhere in an alternate universe, Ten Yen Ranma-chan shudders.
>> Shampoo stuck her head out of the kitchen. <Gack!> It
>was the whole
>> gaggle of Tendou sisters, but no Ranma. *Sigh.* Ranma
>could pinch
>> her rear anytime he wanted... and other places, too.
>
>But not her grandmother's rear. Mousse's rear she
>supposed she could let
>slide, though.
You're going there. Didn't we talk about not doing this? ;)
>> "Now, Akane," Kasumi smoothly said, "I'm sure Ranma-kun had good
>> reason for being so hungry, and he did say he was
>sorry. He does get
>> a lot of exercise, you know. Besides, if he hadn't eaten them,
>> Saotome-no-ojisama certainly would have." There was just the
>> slightest hint of disapproval in Kasumi's voice.
>
>She'd have to spank Genma on general principles later.
Nodoka: Sorry, Kasumi-chan, but if anyone is going to spank Genma--
Genma: Oh, Mistress! Again!
Nodoka: [coloring slightly] Mind our secrets, Genma. I'll have to
punish you for that later.
Genma: Wai!
:P
>> Out of excuses to delay, Shampoo strode out of the
>kitchen to see
>> Akane and Nabiki looking at Kasumi with half-lidded eyes.
>>
>> "Shampoo take order now?" The lethal Amazon flipped
>open her pastel
>> order pad.
>
>and drove her pencil through Nabiki's eye. (You did say
>she was lethal :P)
... My, did you hear what happened to DB?
No!
A squad of Amazons reached out of his computer screen and yanked him
into one of his fanfic worlds.
Hmmm...
>> "I can't imagine what the reason for being so hungry
>could be. No
>> one's attacked in days."
>
>Bit wordy. I'd shorten it to. "I can't imagine why he was
>so hungry. No
>one's...'
Agreed.
>Akane sniffed and opened her menu.
>>
>> "Maybe he just really likes duck," Nabiki offered,
>opening her own
>> menu. "I like duck."
>>
>> "Well, so do *I*, but THREE whole ducks?! I mean, honestly!"
>
>Shampoo: Shampoo agree. From the size of Akane thighs, it
>no look like she
>eat more than two ducks for every meal.
>
>Kasumi: Now that was a rude thing to say.
>
>Shampoo: Shampoo sorry.
>
>Kasumi: You're right about it, of course, but it was
>still a rude thing to
>say.
>
>Akane: Hey!
Hehehehehehe.
>> "They did have a very savory aroma," Kasumi observed.
>>
>> "Yeah, and they weren't cheap, either." Nabiki set her
>menu down,
>> frowning.
>
>If she's frowning I take it she hasn't gotten her sisters
>to agree to pay
>for the bill here. :)
Not yet, anyway. ^_^
>> "There's nothing quite like a well-cooked Peking Duck,"
>Kasumi said.
>>
>> "Shampoo like duck." She then jumped, wondering why
>she'd even tried
>> to join the conversation.
>
>Wouldn't be much of a fic if she didn't. :)
Point.
>> The Tendou sisters blinked at her, and then as one,
>turned to look
>> at Mousse. Mousse was frozen in mid-table wipe, trying
>to decide if
>> what Shampoo had said was good or bad for him.
>
>Bad, stupid. :)
Heh.
>> Shampoo rolled her eyes. "Tendou Akane? What your order?"
>
>Akane: Leave Ranma alone?
>
>Shampoo: No have that on menu. But nice try
Akane: Leave ME alone?
Shampoo: Why? When you so cute. *Nuzzle, nuzzle*
Akane: ACK!
DFR: Okay, I had a brief attack, but I'm better now and the
underwear are back in the drawer.
Happi: One of my best students!
Cast: Ooooog...
>> Shampoo momentarily drifted away on dreamy thoughts of
>Akane wed to
>> Mousse, leaving Shampoo to comfort Ranma after having
>been rejected
>> by the kitchen destroyer. <Aiyaa! It's perfect!>
>
>Well, only if you place some 'Veils Over Others' Eyes'.
>
>Hell, no, that wasn't a plug. Stop being paranoid. Nobody
>likes a paranoid.
>Especially the people out to get them.
/me slaps DB around a bit with a large trout...
:)
Hey, get them plugs in when ya can! :)
>> "Akane like duck?" Shampoo interrupted Akane's
>explanation, much to
>> the latter's annoyance. "Shampoo give Akane Mousse for free."
>
>Akane: No thanks. I like my hair just fine. But nice try.
Running gags. Gotta love 'em! ^_^
>> Cologne was surprised at just how much fun living in
>Nerima could
>> be. She smiled as the conversation in the dining area started up
>> again.
>
>Heh.
:) Although that one paragraph has been edited out.
>> "Well," Akane offered, "I guess we'll just have to take
>your word
>> for that, then. No duck? Are you sure?"
>
>Shampoo: Akane can eat Mousse if she that desperate for
>it. He probably
>enjoy it. He act like no one go down on him for years.
Yes, folks! The closet, self-denying H contingent has entered the
auditorium. ^_-
Mihoshi: Make that 'teasing', too! I wanted some of Tenchi in
Vacation Days, darn it!
Aeka and Ryouko: [glaring down at Tenchi from their respective
demonheads]
Tenchi: ... Aheh.
>> Akane smirked at having elicited a slip of annoyance
>from Shampoo
>> and turned back to her menu. "Well, hang on a minute. I
>gotta read
>> tha menu."
>>
>> Kasumi's eyes peered reprovingly from over the top of
>her own menu.
>> "Speech, Akane."
>
>Speech? What's that supposed to mean?
She's chiding Akane for her rough speech habits, that seem to be
occurring thanks to Ranma's presence. However, I can see that it is
not especially clear. Will revise for clarity.
>> "*I* don't have a problem with duck. What's YOUR problem with
>> duck?!"
>>
>> "Shampoo no have problem with DUCK!
>
>Shampoo pulled out a sword. "But Akane going to have all
>the 'duck' she can
>handle if she no place order soon and Shampoo start
>swinging at head."
Heh.
>> Shampoo steamed at Akane, but nodded. "Is BIRD! ALL is
>bird!" She
>> raised her abused order pad and smiled thinly. "So, one garlic
>> chicken for Naaa-biii-kiii?"
>>
>> Nabiki cocked an eyebrow at Shampoo's pronunciation,
>
>Considering how everyone butchers Shampoo's name,
>Nabiki's got nothing to
>gripe about. :)
Heh. True, although I doubt Nabs would bother to see it that way...
unless you paid her to, of course. ^_^
>> "Ranma really likes duck," Akane said on a long shot,
>wondering if
>> she could goad Shampoo into anything further. She succeeded.
>>
>> "FINE! Airen want duck?! Airen go marry MOUSSE!"
>
>And somewhere in Nerima, Ranma looked over the koi rod he
>had finally
>rediscovered. All he had to do now would be to 'Cast a
>Second Line in the
>Sea' and Mousse would finally be his at last.
Cast-Ryouga: But... But, RANMA-CHAN!
Cast-Ranma: Sorry, pork butt. I got a hankering for some Peking--
er, hankering for a Chinese man. *Smacks lips as her stomach
growls.*
C-Ryouga: But... But... I gotta a whole roll of ten yen coins!
C-Ranma: *WHAM!* Wrong fic, bacon breath.
Mousse: RANMAAA! How DARE you abuse kawaii Ryouga-chan!! DIIIIIE!!!
Ranma: ....
(Okay, I think I've firmly gotten even the most remote of yaoi urges
out of my system... :)
>> "HEY!" Mousse finally had to comment.
>
>Kasumi: But it would certainly settle some issues around
>here. Might raise a
>few others, though.
Hmmm...
>> "... ... Shampoo not say that. Nope. Is old Joketsuzoku
>technique.
>> Make you THINK you hear that."
>
>Heh
Heh. That was one of the first bits I thought of for this fic.
>> The pencil in Shampoo's hand snapped in two. "Then TAKE
>MOUSSE OR
>> ORDER SOMETHING ON MENU!"
>>
>> "You donn't
>
>don't
Yup. Snagged that one already, but thanks. I might not have.
> have to SHOUT IT!" Akane rejoined, genuinely miffed.
>>
>> "WHAT... What you want, then?! Mousse or food?! Yes?!"
>>
>> Akane blinked and looked at the blind boy, who was
>blinking back at
>> her. "Mousse?" she said querulously. "Why would I--"
>
>Well, he's one of the few guys around that puts no
>demands on you or craves
>your attention, therefore gaining the least of your ire.
>Hey, it could work.
>:)
AKANE: MOUSSE!
MOUSSE: ACK!
AKANE: Will you promise to obey me, cherish me, and love me until I
die... putting aside all others and the, ahem, occasional mallet,
shinai, bokken, stone lantern, dinner table, tanuki...
MOUSSE: *piku piku* AKANE! MY LOVE!
SHAMPOO: ... Shampoo hit you plenty! What going on?! ... Shampoo
confused over development.
>> "What?!" Mousse was still trying to assimilate the strange
>> conversation.
>
>That might take a while.
Or maybe not. He's about to get some visual aids in the form of twin
bonbori. ^_^
> "But, Shampoo!"
>>
>> "Look, you bimbo!" Akane growled.
>
>That was it. Shampoo decided to let her have it. "< And
>somehow is it my
>fault plebians such as yourselves are reduced to speaking
>solely in your own
>inherent barbaric tongue rather than learning a civilized
>language that is
>spoken by nearly a sixth of the world? Why must it be
>that I am set upon by
>the vast forces of this universe, nay, impaled by the
>daggers of humanity's
>ignorance and am forced to employ a language that holds
>no interest for one
>as incredibly beautiful as the sea, nay, as the stars themsel-->"
>
>Her diatribe was cut short by a thrown pan that connected
>with the back of
>her head. Cologne poked her head from out fo the kitchen.
>"How many times
>must I tell you to speak in Japanese? By all the gods
>child, you're worse
>than Kunou when you use our native tongue. I should have
>thrown you in the
>spring of drowned mute."
HAHAHAHA!!! Well, can't think of any better response to that. ^_^
>> "ARGH! I don't WANT Mousse! As a husband OR ingredients!"
>>
>> "Why not? He make FINE duck-- er, airen for Akane!"
>
>He's a versitile guy.
I am suddenly reminded of that book that was so popular a while back
and for such a suitably short period of time: 101 Uses for a Dead
Cat.
Shampoo: *shudder*
>> "ACK!!" Mousse squawked again and plastered himself against the
>> wall, laid out like a large fowl about to be de-boned.
>>
>> "Shampoo want TALK to you! You be airen to Akane!"
>>
>> "HEY!" Akane shouted. "That's NOT what I MEANT!!"
>
>But that's what you're going to get. :)
^_^
>> "Guys sunbathe topless, and I'm a guy,"
>
>A guy with big knockers, but still a guy.
Details, details... :)
> she grumbled to herself.
>> <Too bad Tendou-san doesn't see it that way...> But she
>then smiled
>> as the sun started warming her. There was just
>something about the
>> way she felt when sunning in this body that was just so
>utterly...
>> pleasant that she wished she could do it completely nude. She
>> grinned naughtily, but decided not to put name to any
>other feelings
>> she might be having.
>
>Especially since this isn't labeled 'Lime' :)
BINGO!!!
/me hands DB a cigar.
>> Genma-panda growled and held up a sign. <"For the FIFTH
>TIME! Quit
>> ogling my son!"> The panda grumped to himself as the
>sign flipped
>> around in time to a noise from his stomach. <"Dratted,
>ungrateful
>> boy! Didn't even leave me any duck!">
>
>Heh. Cute.
>
>D.B. Sommer
Thanks for the commentary, DB. Greatly appreciated.
- Dave
*******************************************
D.F. Roeder
FanFiction - http://home.flash.net/~dfroeder/index.html