Now for some miscillanious comments on Neon Jusenkyo Evangelion.
-The introduction where we have a boy executed for alledged >crimes.
Not alleged. He did take the Eva.
"Actions alleged to be crimes" would be a better description, since it's
implied that the "NERV Property" that he "stole" included himself.
Seriously though, as good as this scene is, to me a public execution
would much better fit the WWII story Grave of the Fireflies.
Shush! I haven't seen that yet. No spoilers!
say what? is this a fanfic or a book or what?
Sykes is from Third Branch, US Division... Uhm, I REALLY don't want
to give any more of this away. Suffice to say Third Branch was
created by some con friends of mine. They don't act like First Branch,
Japan Division. They're far less... dysfunctional.
What's second?
-I wonder what the big deal over the sixth child is? Are NERV so
hurting for finance that they'd go so far out of their way to get it, or
is Gendou just looking for someone else to backstab?
We've abandoned canon in order to make Shinji a Girl and to involve
a new pilot. As for financing, yes, we hear many times they're hurting
for money. And as for the Sixth, well, we all know about Shinji's
class. Trust me, she is there for a reason, and not because I randomly
decided to stick in a new pilot.
How long till they discover hot water? or how about it be like that one
ranma fic where a musk 'warrior' accidentally dropped the chiisuton into
the pool?
Everyone knows that
it's not in the original, but I'm willing to give the benifit of the
doubt, just. Nothing personnal, blame my friend.
-Mandrake test? Kevin must have grown up on Mandrake the Magician
comics and Saturday morning cartoons of Defenders of the Earth. I've
seen it too, along with Robotech that always followed.
I was thinking of Mandrake Linux, actually, but I know what you're
talking about.
Heh. I first thought of mandrake linux when i read this as well.
Hey, at least she didn't call it the Red Hat test...
-Okay, I admit that I don't like stories that are clearly out of
context, I admit that, but I did like the bit between Shinji and >Asuka.
Explain the "clearly out of context" thing, and thanks for liking the
Shinji/Asuka bit.
it was jarring, but i can't put my finger on it.
'Either Asuka didn't recognize him, or she was playing stupid to trap
him in something else. Probably the latter.' Find it hard to be honest
in C&C sometimes. Too damn nice.
I don't think asuka is smart enough to play stupid like that. yeah, sure
she's a genius. a BOOK genius, not a PRACTICAL one.
-I don't get the exchange between Shinji, Asuka and Xia. If Travis
Kennedy were reading this, he'd be spitting bricks about now, ranting
and raving about hypocrasy, about degrading something because they don't
understand it then write something that isn't understandable. I couldn't
do something like that, though.
Travis, however, was downright rude to me. He raved and ranted at me
for practically 10K. I at least want to know what you people think,
10K may be an exaggeration, and probably at least some of that was
constructive. however, i agree. if a C+C is too dense with negative
things people tend to go blind to anything else in it, so it's the worst
way to try and help them improve a fic.
and if you tell me something I need to change, and I agree, I will
change it. I respect the opinions of those on the list. That's why
I am still here.
-(egg on face) Oh, I get it now. This is where the Ranma influence
comes into play. Well Shinji always was a girl.
wait a minute... they're at jusenkyo, he falls into one of the pools,
asuka seems not to recognize him but still addresses him as a sentient
human being, and you DIDN'T come to that conclusion?!?
Oh, ok, you meant about the female thing, right.
-Kevin maintains that this isn't a Ranma crossover, however I feel
that there's enough in here for it to be a crossover. Some may not agree
with me, but my Metal Gear\NGE fic has even less, yet I feel that it's a
crossover.
Feel how you like. I don't feel it's much of a crossover because the
only aspect of the Ranmaverse I'm using is Jusenkyo.
continuity crossover vs character crossover vs plot crossover (the
latter sometimes misreferred to as a fusion. a fusion involves plot from
only one series and characters from others.)
This is a continuity crossover because it would appear to take place in
the future of some version of the ranmaverse. -a- ranma existing in the
past is referred to as well as the obvious of jusenkyo existing.
-I can just imagine how Gendou would react. And Rei, well, I sure
wouldn't mind seeing how she responds to it all.
-First the good point. I like it how writers include charecters such
as Maya whenever they can, make them more major players.
I included Maya? Where? Do you mean Makoto? Can I just not remember
my own fic?
Maya will come into it. I have plans for her, but I didn't think she
was in volume 0:1.
evidently he skimmed back up and saw the name in one of his own
comments.
Now the bab
point, again, having a Shito attack here goes against what's happened.
Then again, I think even the comics had things like this that directly
go against the TV series.
heh. does the anime really predate the manga or is this just one of the
extremely ignorant types that believes the anime is canon and nothing
else is?
Yea, the attack is really the breaking point from the series. The
I'd say shinji's curse is, myself. but that's just me. ;)
angel is an angel, but it isn't from the canon. I did research my
angels. Ascent of the Fallen taught me good research is needed if
you wish to split from canon.
hmm. what research? i wasn't aware that there were any other angels in
any sort of mythology on which eva was based that weren't ultimately
included in the series.
-I had to roll my eyes when Gendou isn't fazed by how well Xia is
doing. Just what is he up to?
You think I'm just going to out and tell you? I wouldn't be much
of a writer if I did that.
and Gendou wouldn't be much of a... Gendou... if he revealed anything.
-I always find Eva battles to be written badley, all of them,
without exception. That's why I've never written an Eva battle in any of
my fics, all of them turn out wrong.
Yes, and I frankly am pretty bad at battle scenes, but I feel they're
needed.
hmm... maybe there needs to be more cooperation on the list... get
someone else willing to write it. the same for lemon scenes, but that's
not really related to this fic.
-The end, well, the end doesn't give any sense of closure. It's a
little confusing, to say the least. Who died, Xia or Asuka? What
happened to the Shito, and Shinji, for that matter? What's up with
Gendou? And why, since it seemed so important at the beginning, is there
nothing more about what's happened? Maybe these questions will be
answered in the following chapters, but I have to be honest. It's more
than a little off for Mr Callahan to say that fics he doesn't understand
are rubbish,
Where did the word rubbish come from! I never said rubbish. Need I
quote my own reviews? You misunderstand me. I in fact said that I
withheld comment on the fic because I didn't understand it. I cannot
judge that which I do not understand. I said that in EFR, and I can
quote it if you wish me to.
you did not need to bring up such a fic at all if you felt unqualified
to comment on it.
then write a story that other people don't understand. Just
where is this fic going? I just hope that future chapters clear
everything up. And the Eva feel isn't there, it's more like Ranma or
even Ninja Scroll than Eva, that's the feel I had when reading this.
Ok, now I understand that feel thing. I mean I understand that
different series feel different. I don't understand why it feels
like another series though.
why does the 'feel' matter in an altaverse or indeed any fanfic?? "Ill
Met By Starlight" didn't 'feel' like Ranma... "The Cross-Time Adventures
of Athena and Shelia" sure as hell didn't 'feel' like sailor moon...
people write pokemon darkfics, chibiusa or sasami lemons, ranma1/2 WAFF
fics, and all kinds of other wierd fics, and you think 'feel' matters?
even if it doesn't match canon facts or canon 'feel', a fic can still be
a very good piece of writing in its own right. of course, on the other
end of the spectrum there's Oscar, but let's not get into that. what
'feel' does MTCFF obey? how much canon "feel" from AMG, FF, Pokemon,
or Street Fighter is obeyed in that, despite using major elements from
all those and minor elements from MANY others (i don't think the
CyberGrrlz counts as any 'major' elements from nukunuku or tenchi or
a-ko or whatever else because it's a composite of all those. Hiro
and Dai are the major elements from R1/2 and most of their dynamic is a
complete fabrication) Hell, how much does it "Feel" like the original
Controversial Jack stories? to be considered a fanfic, a story has
to be is written by a fan of a work of writing, whether that work be a
TV show, an anime, a comic book or manga, or a novel, in a way that is
clearly influenced by that work.
While no means a bad fic, there have been worse, even some of the best
writers I know (Adrien Forest and Jon. L, since you ask) always have
their fics read time and time again by pre-readers numourous times
before they even think about putting it on the list. Mr Callahan would
do well to follow suit. And before you ask, no, I'm not avaiable for pre
reading as I have a full plate as it is. My two cents in, see you next
time when I finish the NGE\Metal Gear crossover Sisters of Destruction.
I was under the impression that the FFML WAS for prereading. Isn't
it the RAAC that's the final stop, even though I've never actually
considered sending anything there?
you were correct.
You have been talking to the Millenium Man, Y3K.
Y3K+1 if you want to use the word "Milennium", and you also have to
spell it right to get a permit
I'm out like the
nineties. Peace.
Kevin Callahan
Kionon
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