Catching up on some backlog here....
"Miller, Bert" <bert.miller@unisys.com> wrote:
Akane's a Mutant? Oh No!
Because Akane being Green Lantern is just soooo last month....
One shopkeeper turned to another. "Another gaijin martial
artist?"
"That or an autonomous warlord from Communist China."
SHOPKEEPER: And what other kind of China is there? Do you honestly
believe I'd think Taiwan has enough room for a warlord?
OTHER SHOPKEEPER: Who asked you?
A small crowd of students gathered to hear the explanation.
Removing his sunglasses, the gaijin pointed his finger into the
air. "Mutants are the next step in human evolution, homo
superior! We are feared and hated by normal humans because of
our powers and abilities, far beyond those of mortal man! We are
the first Cro-Magnons facing the last Neanderthals!"
Wonder if this guy's aware that evidence has shown Neanderthals to have
been *smarter* than Cro-Magnons.
The students scratched their heads. "Is that anything like Sailor
Senshi?" "No, more like Gatchaman, I think..."
Ranma stood, scratching his head. "Ummm... so whattazat mean,
Two head-scrachings in a row here. (Wow, an actual comment instead of a
quip. What's this world coming to?)
Putting his hands close together, Blue Thunder closed his eyes and
stood perfectly still, while blue electric flashes built up
between his palms. After a minute, he opened his eyes and thrust
his hands toward a handy nearby tree. A lightning bolt, again
blue, shot towards the tree and shredded its bark completely off
the tree's midsection.
Hm. If his power takes that much build-up, he's probably not much use in
a superhero battle.
"Some bald professor in a wealthy suburb of New York?"
The Blue Thunder's jaw hit the ground. He held both hands up in
warding-off gestures.
Nabiki smirked as she walked off. "Next time you guys erase all
the Pentagon records on yourselves, remember the offsite backups
as well."
Ahhhh, she saw the movie with Patrick Stweart.
Adopting a stern expression, Blue Thunder pronounced,
"Inexplicable demonstrations such as these often cause normal
humans to hate and fear us."
Nabiki poked Akane, who drifted over a few inches, still flailing.
"I think normal humans are more likely to keel over in helpless
laughter."
No reaction from Akane to this?
Blue Thunder joined the house's residents for dinner. Akane still
hadn't figured how to get down, so she simply hovered cross-legged
Did they try tying a rope to her?
Happosai bounded into the room. Patting Nabiki on the back, he
removed Nabiki's bra in the blink of an eye, and went on the
Akane. Ranma grabbed him out of the air and held him up.
went on to Akane.
"This is where my computer detected the emissions, Luna! There's
a youma in this house, stealing energy!"
"Those devils who seek to harm innocent humans beware ME! The
108th generation Devil Hunter is HERE!"
"The Magi confirm, reading is Blue! She's an Angel!"
AKANE: Why ME?!? This is the kind of thing that happens to RANMA!
Though I did enjoy Jed's fic, this was a funny spoof of the concept. The
only major suggestion I'd make is that the Happosai connection at the
end came a little out of the blue. It might help to show his presence
before or at least mention it. Ideally I'd like to have the noodles
mentioned, but that might be too hard to do without giving away the
punchline.
Also, you can probably squeeze in more jokes... The two Blue Thunders,
for example -- I can imagine people talking about our friendly mutant
and Kuno thinking they mean him. Akane's "condition" ought to be good
for some slapstick, too. But it's already quite funny as is.
Gary Kleppe
http://www.akane.org/gary/comics.html