The cement was still green, guys! It takes about twelve hours for it to
reach full strength, which for truck delivered stuff is about 3000psi.
Hand mixed green concrete would be much less strong.
End of Problem.
Don Granberry.
allyn yonge wrote:
Date:
Thu, 14 Sep 2000 00:22:48 -0700
From:
Jamie and Bridget Wilde
<wildeman@psn.net> | Block address
Reply-to:
wildeman@psn.net
Organization:
Fission Park
To:
Dave Menard <deibu_kun@sympatico.ca>,
ffml@fanfic.com
Subject:
[FFML] Re: [Fic][Ranma/x-over] The Shadow
Of
The Past
My comments@@
<SNIP>
THE BAD:
Is it really that important to have the story set in
1940? First of
all,
it makes Cologne more than just a touch too old for
the character
you've
portrayed so far. Second of all, if you wanted tension
between the
United States and Japan, there was plenty of that
throughout the 1930s,
and even as far back as the the mid 1920s, American
military planners
were considering an eventual war with the Japanese
Empire.
@@I've got to admit that I never even thought of that
when I was reading. OTOH, if Cologne's age is given
as 100 in the manga, then she would be, apparently,
middle aged in the 1940's. Asian's in general appear
very youthful through out their lifetime and I'd
expect Amazon's to do a better job than the average
person. In terms of this story I think a minor change
to "apparently young woman" or something
of that sort would save the day. And it would
certainly fit with my suggestion to make the Amazon
less fearful in the story. For a "Blood Hunt" to a
distant land I'd expect them to send their most
experience warrior, which would imply maturity and
experience.
THE UGLY:
The idea that the Shadow, with at most sixteen rounds
of .45 caliber
hardball loaded in his nickel-plated rods, could
shatter the block of
cement Cologne's feet were encased in is ludicrous.
Better to have one
of his minions come and free her later, and that way
you could have a
scene where Cologne and the henchman compare the rings
they've been
given.
@@ Again, I didn't notice this. Probably due to my
mind being clouded. ^_^
However
I'd expect this to be the result of his advanced
mental training allowing him to find the "breaking
point" of the cement and exactly hit it with his
shots, shattering the cement block.
{Geeez, and here I spent all that time trying to
convince him he wasn't being outrageous enough. ^_*
Compared to "The Spider, Master of Men, The Masked
Marvel, The Green Hornet, Captain Marvel, King of the
Rocket Men, etc. etc. I didn't find a .45 shattering
cement at all out of the ordinary. }
Jamie
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