The FFML Synopses List REVIEW! (go 'way, I'm asleep.)
====================== -_- zzz
For the week of: July 28, 2000
Reviewer on Duty: Glazius Falconar, Watcher, Dreamer, but mostly Sleeper
Synopses Reviewed: About twenty
* * * * *
[Ah! Megami-Sama! / Buffy the Vampire Slayer]
- - - - -
Title: Brimstone Raising
Chapter: 8
Series: Oh My Goddess!/Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Genre: crossover
Author: Skyrocket
Email: skyrocket35@hotmail.com
Archived At: http://www.fanfiction.net
Date Sent to FFML: 7/25/00
Series Summary:
The power of the Hellmouth has drawn Mara to Sunnydale. When the
goddesses learn of her location it becomes a race against time to stop
Mara from possibly unleashing a great evil into the world. But all is
not as it seems. Somewhere in the shadows someone is watching. And
everything is going as they desire. Can even the combined might of
the Norns and the Slayer stop Mara from destroying the world?
Episode Summary:
And you thought the Legion of Doom was bad. When The Mayor, Mara and
Mr. Trick get together to plot against our heroes the good guys odds
take a nosedive. Especially when Mara decides to stir things up
personally.
Ladies and gentlemen, The Plot Thickens. In any room consisting of n
villains, there are at least n separate agendas, and such certainly seems to
be the case. A good example of how to write evil people without your readers
wanting to throw rotten tomatoes at the screen, a little humor here and
there, and a lot of setup but very little indication of where things go from
here... which is necessary, in a continuing series. This series is
definitely worth a shot.
* * * * *
[Bubblegum Crisis]
- - - - -
Title: Rain in the Shadows
Chapter: Teaser/1
Series: Bubblegum Crisis
Genre: Adventure, Science Fiction
Author: Jerico Mele
Email: jmele@brandeis.edu
Homepage: www.brandeis.edu/~jmele
Date Sent to FFML: July 25, 2000
Series Summary:
The pre-Knight Sabers adventures of Leon McNichol and Daley Wong, ADP
detectives.
Episode Summary:
A rainstorm, a body and a dream.
Teaserish, definitely. I'd check some of the minor grammar bits - missing
commas and words broke up otherwise good plotting and scene-setting. It
makes a good setup for a story, especially the dream sequence, which I'm
currently mulling over about ten explanations for, physical and meta-.
Anyway, it's a pretty good lure, and I'd probably bite if I knew enough
about BGC to appreciate it. Heck, I might anyway. You folks out there should
consider it, too.
* * * * *
[Crossover]
- - - - -
Title: The Dragon, The Dance, The Ronin
Chapter: Part 1: These Shadows Called Home...
Series: Not Given, Ninja Scroll
Genre: Action
Author: The Neo-Reaper (Jamie Lays)
Email: neoreaper@ns.sympatico.ca
Date Sent to FFML: July 24, 2000
FFML Archive Number: 12924
Size: 13 KB
Series Summary:
Following the adventures of Jubei after the events in the film.
Episode Summary:
Jubei unintentionally gets himself into another mess as he is accosted
by thieves and ends up in the hands of a vigilante group called Fallen
Angels.
Hmm. It seems a little - dry. I can't say much more than that, really, but
just because kicking ass and taking names is routine for Jubei doesn't mean
it should be routine for the reader. Every battle is inherently dangerous
unless one side is extremely outclassed... mmm, and to be honest, after
defeating a band of devils and a somewhat immortal shadow from his past, a
couple of guards and a guy on a horse really _shouldn't_ faze Jubei, even a
little.
- - - - -
Title: The Dance, The Dragon, The Ronin
Chapter: Part 2: Wet Feet
Series: Not Given, Ninja Scroll
Genre: Action
Author: The Neo-Reaper (Jamie Lays)
Email: neoreaper@ns.sympatico.ca
Date Sent to FFML: July 27, 2000
FFML Archive Number: 12991
Size: 15 KB
Series Summary:
Following the adventures of Jubei after the events in the film.
Episode Summary:
A new member of the Fallen Angels (for the time being), Jubei is sent
along with a few reluctant companions on a mission of justice.
::sigh:: You don't point out how out-of-character a character is acting. I
mean... his life had to be directly threatened to spur him into action when
the _world_ was at stake. And the battle scene... went on a bit too long.
Fight scenes are one of the _hardest_ things to convert from image into
text, and this one got bogged down in details. You've got a good idea for
this series, but the execution could _really_ use a little polish.
- - - - -
Title: MSTied: Sailor Brittany
Series: Sailor Moon/ Daria/ MST3K
Genre: Crossover
Author: Skyrocket
Email: skyrocket35@hotmail.com
Archived At: http://www.fanfiction.net
Date Sent to FFML: 7/27/00
Archive Number:
Size:
Summary:
The 'bots help Mike relive his high school reunion and Dr. F and frank
go on vaction. But not before leaving our heroes with a awful
Daria/Sailor Moon crossover.
...way abrupt, I often couldn't tell what was story and what was riffing,
Crow's not that H, I didn't laugh much, and this was _really_ too short for
a decent riffing session. It'd make a good warmup piece for a longer fanfic,
and the idea in the host segments, extended, would make for some decent
bookends to one. But as it is... it's too clipped and jerky to be very
useful.
- - - - -
Title: Serpent Moon
Series: Sailor moon/ ????
Genre:Comedy
Author:Carrot Glace
Email:Carrotglace@juno.com
Homepage: Http://www.geocities.com/misaitira/
Date Sent to FFML: 07/21/00
Summary:
A Sailor Moon fusion that doesn't involve Ranma 1/2...
Let me say 1) this is as choppy as everything you've ever written, but it
doesn't hurt too much, and 2) Xelloss makes a decidedly excellent cat.
Slayers doesn't really have a large enough conventional cast for you to
continue this very far, so if you've got sequel plans, don't. It's a funny
idea, but a little fic-piece like this is probably the best vehicle for it.
* * * * *
[Evangelion]
- - - - -
Title: Ascent of the Fallen
Episode: Part Eight: "O death, where is thy sting? O grave, where
is thy victory?"
Series: Neon Genesis Evangelion
Genre: Action, drama, suspense, some WAFF
Author: Sparky Clarkson
Email: sparkster@writeme.com
Homepage: http://members.tripod.com/Sage_Ohlmin/evafic.htm
Archived at: http://members.tripod.com/Sage_Ohlmin/ascent/ascent.htm
Date Sent to FFML: 7-29-00
Title Summary:
In the darkest hour, a light from heaven brings new hope. Mankind's
once-bleak future now offers a glimmer of promise. Yet humanity's
protectors must battle not only the angels from above, but also dark
forces from within. An ancient evil seeks to use their greatest hope
as its key to power. Unless the Evangelion pilots can use their own
inner strength to defeat the overwhelming odds, all will be destroyed.
Can mankind survive the ascent of the fallen?
Episode Summary:
Azrael attacks Tokyo-3, hoping to add all of mankind to his grim
harvest. The Evas are not enough to protect the children from his
promises, and everything once again hinges on an agonized Shinji. In
the aftermath, Shinji finds the strength to admit something to Misato.
As Ritsuko tries to pry into the Magi again, a journey to America
offers Gendo an opportunity.
Oogle. Gendo's just a right bastard, isn't he, folks?
Anyway, Azrael... mmm. He seemed a little... generic, reaching out to Rei.
Then again, this is Rei we're talking about here. But overall, he makes for
one hell of an effective angel. It'd be... better, a bit, if it were
actually animated so we could _get_ the little flashes between imagined
heaven and reality the pilots must be going through. Anyway, folks, read
this series if you haven't started already. It feels a little bit _too_ fast
in places, like the conversation between Misato and Shinji post-fight, but
overall it's a very nice conceptual piece, and the best parts are yet to
come.
- - - - -
Title: EVA 2055
Chapter: Episode 2.0, 'The Luminous Flesh Of Giants'
Series: Evangelion
Genre: Cyberpunk, Divergent Continuity
Author: Adrian Forest
Email: dalziel_86@hotmail.com
Homepage: http://www.geocities.com/dalziel_86/fanfic.htm
Date Sent to FFML: July 01, 2000
FFML Archive Number: 13098
Size: 40K
Series Summary:
The year is 2055. 40 years after Third Impact was aborted, new events
bring old friends together, and bring unfamiliar faces into the
spotlight.
Episode Summary:
On the first day of full operational status, First EVA Cadre has a new
arrival, and some unwelcome visitors.
July... 1? Sorry, but it doesn't turn up in my archives, and those go all
the way up to July 16. Wait! Here it is... at the other end of the month.
July 30. How you get there from here, I'll never know...
...but hey, I ain't complaining. The Rommel scene alone is worth the price
of admission. The Shinji-Asuka scene is worth box seats. The Dr. Chiyoda
scene... oy. Opening night box seats. Catered.
This is a very, very nice piece of work, with some excellent visuals. I
highly recommend it.
- - - - -
Title: The Last Letter
Series: Neon Genesis Evangelion
Genre: Sadfic
Author: Sparky Clarkson
Email: sparkster@writeme.com
Homepage: http://members.tripod.com/Sage_Ohlmin/evafic.htm
Archived at: http://members.tripod.com/Sage_Ohlmin/oneshot/oneshot.htm
Date Sent to FFML: 7/27/00
Summary:
Following the death of Ikari Shinji, a leather chest full of letters
was discovered in his home. This note, released by Mari Suzuhara, is
the final letter of the 400 found.
This is a very nice character piece. Some excellent expressions from Shinji,
the narrative voice paints a very vivid picture of a very fragile man...
just read, folks, this one's definitely worth your time.
* * * * *
[Final Fantasy 7]
- - - - -
Title: All But Blood, Prologue
Series: Final Fantasy VII
Genre: Drama
Author: Gongaga's Son (er... that is, Krista Perry)
Email: kperry@aros.net
Homepage: http://www.akane.org/krista/anime
Archived At: http://www.akane.org/fanfiction
Date Sent to FFML: 7/26/2000
Size: 15K
Summary:
Zack and Cloud are trapped as specimens in Hojo's lab, and, as Cloud's
condition worsens, Zack tries to come up with a plan of escape...
Now this is a decent story. Zack's viewpoint gives a very good view of the
utter twisted bastard Hojo is... mmm. This is a nice prologue, very, _very_
good imaging and great use of first person, but I have one little canon
nitpick. Zack and Cloud are referred to be Hojo's notes in the Shinra
Mansion as Specimens A and B, unless there's _another_ surprise you want to
pull on us, Perry-san...
* * * * *
[Macross Plus / Matrix]
- - - - -
Title: Matrix +
Chapter: 1
Series: Macross Plus
Genre: matrix
Author: Ajax
Email: breaker@technologist.com
Homepage: http://rei.animenetwork.com/ajax/index.html
Archived At: http://rei.animenetwork.com/ajax/fic.html
Date Sent to FFML: July 27, 2000
FFML Archive Number:
Size: 55Kb
Series Summary:
An alternate ending to the Macross Plus series, which plunges our
heroes into a whole new set of adventures...
Episode Summary:
Myung and Isamu find themselves alone and in a strange predicament as
Sharon takes control of the people in Macross.
...okay, first, take out the "let's call it the Matrix" scene. Second, five
pages of dialogue with absolutely _nothing_ else is usually bad form. Give
us a feeling for what's happening around Isamu and Myung as they're talking.
Third, Myung angsting over making Sharon gets old after the second time.
Other than that, this is one great idea for a fic, and I'd like to see it
continued.
* * * * *
[Magic Knight Rayearth / Utena]
- - - - -
Title: The Three Magic Knights
Chapter: Chapter 11
Series: Utena, Magic Knight Rayearth
Genre: Satire
Author: Carrotglace
Email: Carrotglace@juno.com
Homepage: http://www.geocities.com/misatira/
Date Sent to FFML: July 26, 2000
Series Summary:
What if a SI character, didn't want to be stuck in the anime he was
sent to? A kind of light hearted/dark comedy about one such person who
was stuck in Magic Knight Rayearth. Follow Dan as he tries to snuff
out his companions and wreaks havoc through the land of Cephiero.
Episode Summary:
The group finds the Legendary Rune God Celece, and Askot tries his
hand yet gain at defeating them.
...you know, this really would have worked better as a shorter fic. Dan
seems to have only one schtick, and it's grating enough to get old pretty
quickly. I don't know if Magic Knight Rayearth really lends itself to
wackiness well... the bits that are supposed to be funny just feel awkward
to me. Perhaps I'm not coming at it from the right direction...
* * * * *
[Ranma 1/2]
- - - - -
Title: The Airenniichuan
Series: Ranma 1/2
Genre: Alt. Univ / Comedy
Author: Dark Alpha
Email: AlphSailor@aol.com
Homepage: http://www.geocities.com/Tokyo/Bay/7233/
Archived at: Not yet archived
Date Sent to FFML: July 28, 2000 (Revised version)
Archive Number: 13022
Size: 21k
Summary:
It's a new day at Tendo household, and they're having a
visitor... what's this? Akane Tendo, the boy-hater and breaker of the
hearts, is smooching out with the new boy on the street?
Oh wait, Akane and the new boy, Ranma Saotome, have been splashed with
the water from the Spring of Drowned Lovers by their fathers so their
promise to unite the Schools will be fulfilled! But does Ranma and
Akane really want to marry?
And what did Soun mean by that the water was supposed to be for
Kasumi?
Hmm. The revised version has cruddy line-breaking. The original one does
not. Read both of 'em, didn't see much difference, _really_ think you should
show the water going splash as opposed to just starting in the middle - too
much left unsaid that's really necessary because of the _extreme_ alternate
universe this is...
Start this at the beginning. Maybe way back when when Genma and Soun first
concocted the plan. You could make a fairly bizarre but pretty successful
altuniv out of it - as it is now, it's just confusing.
- - - - -
Title: Nodoka's Love
Chapter: One
Series: Ranma 1/2
Genre: Alternate Universe
Author: James M. Zema
Email: zema@uakron.edu
Homepage: http://gozips.uakron.edu/~zema/ranma.html
Archived At: http://gozips.uakron.edu/~zema/nodokas-love1.txt
Date Sent to FFML: July 29, 2000
FFML Archive Number: 13069
Size: 25.1K
Series Summary:
A single decision which Genma makes turns the world in which Ranma
lives around. What if when he decided to present his contract and the
ideas it represented--he did so in the wrong manner? Many people have
questioned what kind of mother would allow her son to be taken from
her as Nodoka did Ranma, in this case Genma will make a mistake, the
contract will be demoted to nothing more than a slip of paper, and
Nodoka's love for her son will have a chance to bloom.
Episode Summary:
An introduction to a family just recently reunited, the cruel
tormentor which has kept them separated sealed away forever (or till
the boulder cracks, whichever comes first). Genma wishes to make his
son into the greatest martial artist the world has ever seen, Nodoka
just wants to be by her family's side, Ranma just wants to have
fun. This begins the tale of how they all begin to get their wish,
though not quite how they might have hoped.
You know, I was inspired by this synopsis to go read the fic. This is how
you should build your blurbs, folks.
In regards to your end comments, I wouldn't worry much. This fic held my
attention all the way through, from start to finish. I wonder how much
jump-cutting you'll have to do, starting this early on. Definitely pick a
few defining moments, and fade gently in and out of them with the nice
narrative flow you've got going. I _definitely_ want to see where the
writing goes from here...
- - - - -
Title: Stallion
Chapter: 8
Series: Ranma w/others
Genre: Xover
Author: Chas Chas
Email: chaspark@hotmail.com
Archived At: http://members.xoom.com/phu_lam/
Date Sent to FFML: July 27th
Series Summary:
After Jusendo, Ranma goes through some changes that worries people in
Nerima. In the city of Tokyo, a new dark force begins to stir...
Episode Summary:
When he wakes up, Tenchi finds himself in the Tendo Dojo. Nodoka
reveals to him that she had known of the true heritage of Masaki
family. But later he finds out that Ranma has forgotten about
Katsuhito and Achika, somewhat mysteriously...
Hmm. Three series at once. Four with cameos. Hoo boy. I really haven't been
reading this since the beginning, and I really don't see anything... well,
original, that'd keep me reading further. Perhaps it's just the time of day
I'm reading this, but while there certainly aren't any major _flaws_ in this
series, it just feels a bit... dry. It doesn't stand up as much on its own
since nothing really happens outside of that synopsis above, and a little
chatter here and there.
* * * * *
[Revolutionary Girl Utena]
- - - - -
Title: What's More Dangerous Than Cruising an L.A. Freeway?
Series: Revolutionary Girl Utena
Genre: Humor
Author: D.B. Sommer
Email: sommer@3rdm.net
Homepage: http://angcobra.jumpfun.com/dbsommer.html
Date Sent to FFML: 7/29/00
Size: 32 kb
Summary:
Akio and Wakaba take a little spin in the Akiomobile.
::ahem:: Wah ha. Although not _quite_ as good as That Poutine Story, You
Know, That One that Alan Harnum and companions wrote a bit back, there are a
few amusing moments in this. It's about equal balance groaners and
chucklers, but unlike That Poutine Thing, it doesn't pretend to take place
in anything like normal Ohtori. So Be Ye Warned.
* * * * *
[Sailor Moon]
- - - - -
Title: Pool Party
Series: Sailor Moon
Genre: Lemon
Author: Valandar the Red
Email: Valandar_the_red@yahoo.com
Homepage: http://valandar.tripod.com/Hello.html
Archived At:
Date Sent to FFML: 7/28
Size: 20 K
Summary:
Six months after the defeat of Galaxia, Sailor Venus takes her
relationship with her current boyfriend well "in hand".
Interesting little PWP piece. That's all I have to say, really. That, and my
sole pastime at university is now forever tainted. IS THERE NOTHING SACRED
IN THIS WORLD?! ...never mind.
* * * * *
[Sailor Moon / Yoroiden Samurai Troopers]
- - - - -
Title: Ronin Summer : Dark Crusade
Chapter: 6 - Entrances and Exits
Series: Sailor Moon / Yoroiden Samurai Troopers
Genre: cross-over
Author: Morgan Hudson
Email: dataraven_659@excite.com
Homepage: http://dataraven_659.tripod.com/roninsummer.html
Date Sent to FFML: July 24, 2000
Size: 39 KB
Series Summary:
Seven strangers and their undead army arrive in the Dark Kingdom and
begin a holy mission of extermination, in the name of a mysterious
figure they call "Mother". Their only opposition are the Masho of the
Dynasty, but can four Yoroiden succeed alone? Of course not, but
fortunately there's help waiting in the wings...
Episode Summary:
The Masho and Outer Senshi arrive in the Dark Kingdom, and connect
with their troops : The Storm Senshi and the remnants of the Imperial
Guard. Learning of Kayura's imprisonment, Anubis sets Rajura to work
on a plan to free her. Rajura does so, and, as usual with most of
Rajura's plans, it goes off without a hitch. Kayura is rescued, and
Anubis gets a new enemy in Thraw.
Ooh. Spiffy bits. It continues to amaze me how you can put out series after
series of this stuff, and make it engaging enough and new enough to keep
coming back to. Great characterization, great plotting, a good installment
in another excellent series. Folks, if you've seen either of these dubbed,
and I know you probably have, read. You won't be disappointed.
* * * * *
[Tenchi Muyou!]
- - - - -
Title: The Princess And The Pirate
Chapter: 5
Series: Tenchi Muyou OAV (with a bit of the TV series mixed in)
Genre: Adventure/Science Fiction
Author: Komodo
Email:kyhdin@aol.com
Homepage: http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Keep/5268/Fanfic/fanfic.html
Archived At: Same
Date Sent to FFML:7/27/2000
Size: I'm guessing it's below 10k.
Series Summary:
Tenchi's the new Emperor of Jurai, he's married to Sasami, and he's
sent Ryoko and Ayeka to the Planet Saradin to assassinate the criminal
mastermind known as the Kingpin and then take his place.
Episode Summary:
Azusa stands revealed as the criminal mastermind known as the
Kingpin. With Ryoko flying Misaki and Funaho back to Noa, Ayeka must
face her father alone.
It was interesting enough... I actually didn't mind the sidelights much...
but, sidelights notwithstanding, there's not really much _here_. I'll say
again that the FFML doesn't make demands about production every so often,
and that if you've got a piece that can be serialized, consider sticking a
couple of these smaller parts together. Otherwise, you get Dragonball Z in
convenient fanfic form.
****
So that's all for this week. Gah. Be glad when I'm back at university and
actually have some _free_ time...
--G. Falconar