Greetings. This is my first attempt at a MiST, so don't kill me yet.
Wait for the second or third MiST, and if I'm still that bad, then kill
me. But not yet. C&C's greatly appreciated, anything that helps me out,
here..
I'd like to say a great thanks to Megane 6.7, who is my favorite MSTer
out there... hillarious stuff, there.
This story was originally made by Kirasmommy, I think. It's hers, I
don't want it. I'm just borrowing it for a little fun, so to speak.
Well, better get on with it.
(Eheh... I can't think of an intro..)
(Door sequence)
Joel and the bots enter the theater and take their respective seats,
wondering what's in store for them. Well...
Disclaimer: I don't own them, I don't make money off this and its just
for fun.
--Tom: Fun for who?
--Crow: Fun for those who think taking an anime show and completely
making everyone out of character, screwing with the normal
relationships and messing with Ranma's sexuality is FUN, THAT'S WHO!!!
--Tom: Oh.
--Joel: Umm... how do you know that, Crow?
--Crow: I read the script.
--Joel: Oh.
Sake
--Tom: Let me out, for God's Sake!!
--Crow: Gonna need some to survive this.
by kirasmommy
--Joel: Where's Kirasdaddy?
--Tom: Probably divorced her after too many bad fics.
--Joel: Makes sense.
Ranma-chan and Ukyo looked over at the lost boy
--Crow: ...and wondered who the hell he was..
sitting in the booth. Ranma-chan had come in looking for hot water on
her way home from school having once again been doused by the old woman
who was the bane of all the cursed.
--Joel: It's my grandma.
--Crow: It's Janet Reno.
--Tom: It's Richard Simmons.
"How long has he been here?" asked the red head.
--Tom: ....As opposed to the redhead, who yelled that.
"Since lunch at least. At first I didn't notice him so it could have
been longer." "And you say he's drunk? He don't look it." Ranma-chan
said. "Oh he's drunk al right he even brought his own beverage.
--Joel: He also drank all my commas!
--Tom: Ryoga Hibiki IS Al Right.
--Crow: So that makes him Mr. Right?
--Tom: Guess so.
--Joel: Well, alot of people are looking for him...
--Crow: And he's always lost. No wonder no one can ever find Mr.
Right... Heh.
Sake from the look of the bottle. He's been drinking all afternoon. I
didn't run him out because he wasn't causing any trouble
--Crow: Except for that one time he killed a group of tourists and ate
their brains...
--Joel: Eww... Crow...
--Crow: Heh heh heh.
and I figured he'd be safer here then wandering around out there
somewhere." said Ukyo wiping down
her counter. "I do think that it's time for him to go, could you see
him home?"
Ranma-chan sighed,"Oh okay I'll take him home. Could you get me that
water while I try to get him moving?" "Sure thing Ranma honey" she said
brightly.
--Joel: Turn her down, she's hurting my eyes.
--Tom: Lame, Joel...
"Hey P-chan whatcha doing?" asked Ranma overly loud.
--Crow: Sleeping with Akane nightly! BWAHAHAHA, AND YOU NEVER WILL!!
UWEE HEE HEE!!
--Tom: Crow, Ryoga's not out of character yet...
--Joel: I think being drunk might count...
Ryoga whispered "Please don't call me that." he looked ready to pull a
Soun Tendo(the only man that can cry more water then his body possible
holds.)
--Tom: ...then his body possible holds what?
--Joel: He assumes we know who Ukyou and Ranma-chan are, but we just
have no IDEA who Soun Tendo is...
--Crow: Who cares what Soun's body holds!? Ranma-chan's body is more
INTERESTING...
"Hey buddy what's wrong?" she leaned down.
--Tom: Well... I'm drunk, nobody seems to know what a comma is, and I
think I ate some bad sushi...
"Nothing Ranma just go away." he laid his head down wallowing in his
depression. "Sorry I can't Ukyo
--Joel: How DOES one Ukyo?
--Tom: It's a new dance! Like the, uhh... Macarena! Yeah, that's it...
--Crow: If someone starts dancing the Macarena, I WILL kill someone..
--Tom: ...
has to close shop early tonight and you need to leave so I'm going to
take you back to the Tendo Dojo." "Why should you care?" he asked with
venom.
--Tom: Because the almighty Kirasmommy says I should, baka...
"Look I don't like seeing anyone so down they think they have to jump
into a bottle
--Tom: Wait, wait... I thought he was DRINKING from the bottle?
--Crow: There are so many things you can do with a bottle...
to feel better. By the way that's a depressant your drinking
--Joel: I AM KING OF THE DRINKINGS!!
it will only make you feel worse in the long run." "I can't possible
feel worse Ranma...."
--Tom: But I could POSSIBLY feel worse...
--Crow: I've felt worse Ranma. This Ranma is kind of nice...
he was interrupted as Ukyo brought the hot water. He studied it as she
handed it to Ranma-chan then he lashed out and knocked it out of her
hands spilling 1it on the floor where it was useless.
--Joel: Uhh, she could just touch the hot water on the floor...
--Crow: Ryoga loses all control of his limbs when he's drunk.
--Tom: <as Ryoga> Sorry, Ranma, I didn't mean to squeeze your breasts.
I'm just drunk...
--Crow: <as Ranma-chan> That's okay. I enjoyed it.
--Joel: I'm only letting you get away with it because Kirasmommy
actually thinks that's how it would happen...
"What did you do that for you jerk?" yelled Ranma-chan. "Never mind you
wouldn't understand lets just go."
--Tom: <as Ryoga> We must go forth in search of the great and magical
commas. We will return when we've found them. Then, and only then, will
our sentences make sense.
--Joel: <as Ukyou> Great. Grab me a six pack while you're out!
--Crow: <as Ranma-chan> Sure thing, Ucchan! What about those birth
control pills, condoms, and that pregnancy test?
--Joel: <as Ukyou> Nah, forget about those. I only need some tampons.
--Tom: <as Ryoga> Alright. Bye, Ukyou-san.
he stood up unsteadily. "What ever." she muttered taking his arm to
keep him from falling over.
As they walked Ranma asked Ryoga once again, "What's wrong? What's with
the drinking huh?"
--Crow: <as Ryoga> Huh is the new 90 proof liquor from Miller. Gets you
drunker than ever with every bottle!
--Joel: <as Ukyou> Pick me up a case!
"You wouldn't understand."
--Joel: And I bet we won't, either.
"Try me besides even if I don't understand maybe getting it off your
chest will make you feel better."
--Tom: I wish they'd hurry up and find those commas...
--Crow: <as Ryoga> Oh, I'll try you, Ranma. But that comes later...
--Joel: Because Kirasmommy said so!
"I doubt it but al right here goes....I'm in love with someone I can
never have."
--Tom: Except in the fanfic world where I can have whatever I damn well
want!
--Joel: Hasn't he always been in love with someone he could never have?
--Tom: Right. Except in the fanfic world.
--Crow: And inside Kirasmommy's head.
--Tom: Exactly.
"Yeah so You've been in love with Akane forever and it's never made you
this depressed before." "It's....it's not Akane. I love another and
it's ripping my heart out."
--All: <singing> Love huuurts, love scars...
He held one of his hands over his eyes. "Oh really well that's
wonderful Ryoga but why don't you think you can get her to go out with
you.
--Tom: I bet you it's either Ukyou or Ranma-chan.
--Crow: I'll take that bet! I think it's Kodachi...
--Joel: You're both wrong! It's Cologne!
--Bots: Eww...
I mean your not that bad a
guy and your not hard on the eyes at all......I mean at least from what
I understand....that is....well you know what I mean.....anyway what's
wrong with her?"
--Crow: <as Ryoga> She's 1'2", 600lbs, her eyes are yellow and pink,
she has a large hump on her back, and she's covered in boils... but
other than that, she's just perfect!
"She doesn't date men really and I don't think she even likes me. It's
a one way attraction." "Bummer can't you at least you know talk to her
maybe she does like you and is just shy or something, you know one of
those types that for some reason can't tell you how she feels." "It's a
lot more complicated then that."
--Tom: ...then that what?
--Crow: Then that is.
--Tom: Oh.. what?!
--Joel: Than. Please, stop the abuse. What did the homonyms ever do to
you, kirasmommy?
He looked down at his feet as he stumbled along beside Ranma. "Well I
think for your sake you either better tell her or get over it." Ryoga
was quiet for the rest of the way to the Tendo's
--Tom: The Tendo's what?
--Joel: The Tendo's Hair Salon.
--Crow: The Tendo's Olde Tyme Liquor Shoppe.
--Tom: The Tendo's International House of Ham.
Once there Ranma took him upstairs to his/her
--Joel: Ranma's a hermaphrodite now?
--Crow: He's in his girl form, you can call her a her.
--Tom: No! Ranma's mind is still male, and he thinks of himself as a
male so he's a he.
--Crow: But his body's female so he's a she!
--Joel: Guys, enough.
--Bots: Sorry..
room.
She had Ryoga lay down on the futon to sleep it off but as she began to
turn around to leave he caught her hand. "Wait.....your right for my
own sake
--Tom: That's poetic.
I need to tell the one I love." "You are wanting me to help you over to
her?" asked Ranma-chan.
"No,.....
--All: Wait for it...
Ranma....
--All: Waaait for it...
I love .......
--All: Waaaaait for it...
you."
--All: There! <cheers>
--Joel: Uh, what was the point of that?
--Tom: Point? We don't need no stinkin' point.. And Crow..
--Crow: <gives Tom a $20 bill> I'll get you back, Servo...
His head drooped down on his chest.
--Crow: ..He had failed to see Shampoo standing behind him with her
swords, and was promptly decapitated... The End.
--Joel: <as Shampoo> You no make pass at airen, pig boy!
"What? you're drunker then I thought."
--Tom: <stares at the screen>
--Crow: Tom?
--Tom: <continues to stare> It's... amazing..
--Crow: What is?
--Tom: <stares some more> She used "you're" in the right place...
Ryoga shook his head and looked back up tears shimmering in his eyes.
--Joel: I can't think of anything...
--Tom: Me neither.
--Crow: Well, let's just make a comma comment, then.
--Joel: <hands the author a box of commas> You seem to be out of stock.
"No It's the truth I love you Ranma and I can deny it no more. I will
leave now and never come back I'm sorry."
--Crow: "Touching love scenes" just aren't the same when they're
written like that...
--Tom: Well what do you expect did you think wed get a good fic or
something
--Joel: <slaps Tom's dome> Errgh, it's taking over..
He tried to stand but Ranma pushed him back down. "Oh no you don't, you
don't just drop a bomb shell like that then take off.
--Joel: I dunno about you, but I wouldn't stick around after I dropped
a bombshell..
--Crow: Double or nothing says Ryoga does. I still gotta get you back
on that bet, Tom..
--Tom: You're on!
You need to stick around until we figure out what to do about this."
"What's to do?
--Joel: <as Ranma-chan> We'll shoot Akane, collect the insurance and
run off to Vegas to get married! It's perfect!
What's to figure out?
--Tom: 90% of the fic..
You don't feel the same so I should leave." "You big jerk" Ranma-chan
sighed. Then she leaned down and took his head in her hands, then
kissed him long hard and deep.
--Crow: <as Beavis> Dude.. he said "long hard".. huh huh huh...
"huh?"Ryoga smiled with hope in his eyes
--Joel: Sounds painful.
for the first time in a long time. Ranma-chan smiled "That's just the
beginning my sweet."
--Tom: The beginning... she says?
--All: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
The title sake can be taken as the drink or as one's personal welfare.
^_^ :) ;)
--Tom: And remember, ascii emoticons are you friends..
--Joel: Wait.. I think it's done!
--Crow: It IS!
--ALL: WOOHOOOO!!!
(All exit the theater)
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