C&C is welcome...if its constructive.
If you don't like the formatting in this please come
to my website and download the fic. Or if you want
email me at frice2000@yahoo.com for it. My homepage's
adress is http://members.dencity.com/frice2000 .
Thats all enjoy.
Zel � Part I Version 1.3
Added all Omakes. Fixed and checked Grammar. Done.
A Kind of Crossoverish Story Written by Frank Rice
Disclaimer: All of the following characters are not
mine. The Slayers are owned by Software Sculptors and
the evil ADV Films. All names and spell names are
entirely theirs. Jusenkyou and Ryouga are property of
Rumiko Takashi and Viz Videos. Any other ideas are
mine and only mine. Names and places have also been
changed to protect the innocent (wait a minute no they
haven�t).
Camera: Fade into an airplane on a trip to China.
Lina: You know this magic is really cool.
Gourry: Magic? Why do you think that this is magic?
Amelia: Mr. Gourry how else do you think that we could
possibly fly in the air for this long a time period.
Lina: Yeah but I would hate to see the kind of drain
on sorcerers that have to keep casting all those Rei
wings.
Amelia: I wonder how Mr. Zelgadis is getting along in
the baggage area.
Camera: Fade away to the baggage part of the plane.
And on a small crate that says fourth class.
Zelgadis: Damn them they couldn�t even get me a first
class package rate. Oh no fourth class. I�ve been
bumped around to many damn times. And why did I have
to do this? I mean I�m the one that weighs the most
aren�t I! They should have put Lina in here!
Plane: VROOM!!
Zelgadis: AND I CAN�T SLEEP EITHER! DAMN IT ALL!
Camera: Fade back in on the cabin of the plane.
Lina: I�m sure he�s fine. Besides we�re almost there.
This is going to be a great vacation. And we ditched
Naga to!
Amelia: Was that such a good idea Ms. Lina I mean
she�s going to try and find us when she gets out of
all those chains.
Gourry: Who was this Naga again?
Lina: You mean you forgot already Gourry?!
Amelia: Mr. Gourry don�t you remember the laugh? The
evil�evil laugh?
Camera: Gourry shudders.
Gourry: Oh her�
Amelia: You know thinking about that she kind of
reminds me of someone�
Pilot: Okay travelers. We are going to be landing in
Bei Jing in approximately 20 minutes. Thank you for
flying China Air. Please do not take your weaponry
out of its stowed position until we have landed.
Camera: Fade back into the luggage area.
Zelgadis: Damn it how much longer is this flight going
to last? I have to go to the bathroom and I want to
go to sleep. I haven�t slept for 14 hours either.
Damn them.
Camera: Fade in to the outside of the plane. The
plane lands and then begins to taxi down the airfield.
Fade back into the cabin.
Pilots: Okay thanks again for flying China Air. We
are now passing out a small booklet about Chinese law.
Please read it carefully.
Lina: Okay Amelia you cast a spell on this thing and
translate it.
Amelia: Babelfish*1! Okay it says that if you do any
of the following 20 things you will be shot�
Gourry: What does being shot mean?
Lina: For once Gourry I have absolutely no idea, so it
seems that I can�t answer your question.
Pilot: We have now taxied to our terminal. Please
disembark in an orderly fashion and all passengers
with weapons please remain on the plane until all
passengers without weapons have exited the plane.
Camera: Three people get up and leave the plane while
the vast majority stays in their seats.
Pilots: Okay now everyone with weapons may leave.
Camera: All the rest of the passengers leave the
plane. Lina, Gourry, and Amelia get up and leave the
plane.
Lina: We have to pick up Zelgadis before we go out.
Amelia: Excuse me sir, where can we find the luggage
pick up area?
Generic Person 1: Go straight down that hall and turn
left.
Amelia: Thank you for helping us accomplish a holy
quest for the betterment of justice!
Generic Person 1: Right�
Lina: Okay lets go get him!
Camera: Lina and Amelia Rei Wing over to the luggage
pick up area to get Zelgadis.
Amelia: There he is Ms. Lina.
Lina: Oh Zel! Come on we�re here. Gourry!
Gourry: Right!
Camera: Gourry cuts open the box with his sword and
leaves Zel perfectly untouched.
Zelgadis: Arghhh! Why am I always the person that has
to do this type of stuff? Either I�m an anchor or now
I�m luggage.
Lina: Oh come on Zel were here now we can start our
vacation now!
Zelgadis: VACATION?!! I thought we were on a trip to
find�
Lina: No sorry Zel we�re just on a vacation.
Zelgadis: DAMN IT!!!!
Generic Person 2: Hello Sirs. Would you like to buy a
guide to all the places you can see in wonderful
China?
Amelia: Thinks: Hmm�I sense something evil coming from
this man�but wait he�s wearing white�that means he
must be on the side of justice.
Gourry: How much is it?
Generic Person 2: Only a lock of hair from each of
you.
Lina: Hold it why would you want a lock of our hair?
Generic Person 2: For genetic manipulation techniques.
That way the holy Chinese army can crush all her
enemies.
Amelia: That�s such an evil ambition! I Amelia the
daughter of justice can never allow this evil to take
place I will�
Camera: Lina pulls some of Amelia�s hair out.
Lina: Here sir is this enough hair?
Generic Person 2: Sure that will do.
Camera: Generic Person 2 hands Lina the guide to China
and walks off asking other travelers if they would
like to give hair for the guide.
Zelgadis: That was scary. That guy was almost as
fanatical about this Chinese army as Amelia is about
justice.
Gourry: True�very true.
Amelia: Ms. Lina you messed up my speech again!
Lina: Oh come on Amelia at least we know where to go.
Camera: Lina hands Amelia the guidebook.
Lina: Okay put that translation spell on this book
again.
Amelia: Babel, Babelfish! (That�s getting old�)
Camera: Lina snatches back the guidebook, which is now
in her and all the other Slayers casts native
language. And yes I know they speak Japanese the same
out loud. But they do read a completely different
language. Also have you noticed that everyone in
China speaks Japanese in the Ranma � Universe? And
also that in all fantasies with a different language
they speak Japanese or English to�
Booming Voice: Come on come on I�ll write all that at
the end let�s get back to the fanfic.
Lina: Okay this is all somewhat interesting. Come see
the emperor speak about the wonderful political system
of Communism! Come see the emperor�s jewels! That
would be good for some money... What else�come see the
emperor�s palace! Come see the emperor�s ball room!
Come see the emperor�s other palace! Come see the
emperor�s bathroom! Come join the emperor�s holy
army!
Amelia: Is everything in that book about the emperor?
Lina: Pretty much. Hey wait here�s something
interesting. Come see the magical training ground of
Jusenkyou you�ll never leave the same. Continued on
the next page.
Camera: Lina flips the page.
Lina: A very magical place in a very magical town�The
locations on the first page I guess.
Camera: Lina flips back to the other page.
Lina: Come see us. Just go up the winding mountain of
Juso and then across the river of Tenre. Then up the
other mountain of Reneo. And you�ll be here.
Amelia: That sounds great Miss Lina. Let�s go! We�ll
be able to train our magical abilities there.
Zelgadis: True magical training grounds are rare�I
doubt they would be in a world such as this�
Lina: Yeah I know Zel but we might as well check this
one out.
Gourry: Umm�excuse me but what is a, �Magical Training
Ground�?
Lina: You mean you don�t know.
Zelgadis: Ask the author you baka he just made�I mean
I�ll take this one Lina. A magical training ground is
a place where magic users, and some fighters go and
train to increase their power and or mysticism. It is
usually a place approved by the PMS (professional
magic users society (in OVA episode)).
Gourry: I see so it�s basically a place where you
learn how to use a potty!
Lina: NO NOT THAT KIND OF TRANING YOU IDIOT! Never
mind let�s just go.
Camera: So the Slayers cast set off for Jusenkyou.
Amelia: How long have we been walking for Ms. Lina?
It seems like forever.
Lina: Come on Amelia stop whining we�re almost there.
Camera: A lone man steps out of the woods. He seems
badly hurt and is bleeding from multiple small cuts
all over his body.
Man: Excuse me but where�
Camera: The man falls over.
Zelgadis: That guys really hurt.
Amelia: Yes, we have to help him!
Lina: Fine, fine we might as well he may have some
money or something we can use�
Camera: Amelia runs over to the man.
Amelia: Recovery!
Camera: Amelia begins to use her magic and heals up
the man almost completely.
Lina: Gourry why don�t you start a fire. It looks
like we�re going to be here a while till this guy
recovers.
Man: Ohh�thank you for giving me temporary shelter.
My name is Ryouga Hibiki. I�m kind of lost�and I�ve
been wandering around for quite a while. Where am I
anyway?
Lina: Well Ryouga you�re in China and we�re heading
off to a place called Jusenkyou.
Ryouga: Jusenkyou no you don�t want to go to
Jusenkyou! Wait if your heading for Jusenkyou that
means that I must be close to Jusenkyou and that means
that�I could be cur�
Camera: Ryouga does a back flip over a cliff and
falls.
Lina: Wow that was a long fall.
Amelia: Ms. Lina we have to save him!
Zelgadis: Don�t worry Amelia he�ll be fine look
there�s a lake down there.
Camera: At the lake.
P-Chan: Thinking: Well at least they know not to go to
Jusenkyou now�Now where is it anyway�North�yeah North.
Camera: Ryouga starts to head South�Back up on top of
the mountain.
Lina: Well we might as well camp here. And finish our
journey to these training grounds tomorrow.
Camera: The next day.
Guide: Hello travelers! Welcome to the legendary
training ground of Jusenkyou. As you can see there
many springs here in Jusenkyou and all have there own
special curse.
Amelia: Did you say curse?
Guide: Yes.
Zelgadis: True I did feel an energy coming from those
springs. What do they do anyway?
Guide: They turn people into animals and other
creatures.
Zelgadis: You wouldn�t have a spring of drowned human
here would you?!! Huh, huh? Would you!!!
Guide: Yes. Matter of fact we at Jusenkyou have two.
Zelgadis: SHOW IT TO ME PLEASE!
Camera: The guide walks off and the Slayers cast
follows behind him.
Guide: Here is the first spring of drowned human. It
is the�
Zelgadis: Yes that means that I can get rid of this
Chimera body!
Camera: Zelgadis jumps into the spring.
Guide: Oh�I�m sorry but that was spring of drowned
girl.
Zelgadis-Chan: That was what?
Gourry: Wow would you look at that there�s a girl in
that spring Zelgadis just jumped in�wonder how they
did that trick.
Lina: You idiot that is Zelgadis!
Amelia: Oh�Mr. Zelgadis you look great.
Lina: Well look at it this way Zel at least you aren�t
a Chimera anymore.
Zelgadis-Chan: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Camera: And all across the world and in outer space a
no was then heard by everyone.
THE END
* Stars *: (Yes readers my old way of explaining
stuff the evil stars are indeed back. So let
us get to the one star in the entire fanfic.)
* 1: Babelfish is an online translator that I use
quite frequently for viewing web sites and other
things into another language. It�s a really great
tool and it can be found at
http://babelfish.altavista.com. It�s really good and
I recommend that everyone check it out. I put it in
the story for a little joke that most people probably
won�t get. But oh well. Now at least you�ll get it.
I hope�maybe�and various other synonyms�
Authors Notes: Well there was the first Zelgadis �.
Okay and now for some regular rambling that I usually
have. Well let�s see first of all the reason I
haven�t written anything for a while is school and
it�s finals. I had to study quite a while for it.
Also I was on vacation in Florida and that cut down on
my write time also. And I also watched the New Jersey
Devils win the Stanley Cup too. I guess the other
reason why I didn�t write DoCo � was because I really
don�t like where I took it in the last fanfic. I�m
not happy about what I wrote in and am right now
really trying to figure out in my head if I want to do
a complete re-write of the last fic or actually keep
going with what I wrote. I�ve decided that I�m
rewriting the last part of it. You should see it out
rather quickly. Also I would like to announce that
I�m going to do another PokeKombat style fanfic. And
this time I will kill �em all. It�s getting worse the
craze of Pokemon and I must again vent my frustrations
out on the evil show.
Omakes:
Commercials:
Evil Female Narrator: Ha ha ha ha ha! Frank, you will
never be able to defeat me now! I now have the
Philosophers Stone.
Booming Voice: That�s nice. And where did you find
it?
Evil Female Narrator: In a box of Cracker Jacks!
Camera: Booming Voice face faults and then Little
Cracker Jacks boxes dance around the screen.
Other Narrator: That�s right kids. Now you to can own
a free complimentary Philosophers Stone in all boxes
of Cracker Jacks!
Evil Female Narrator: So as you can see I am now
invincible! Prepare to die Frank!!! Hmm�where did he
go?!! DAMN YOU FRANK!
F-16: Vroom! ERRRRRRRRRRR.
Evil Female Narrator: What�s this thing?
Bomb: 5-4-3-2-1-Bye-Bye! Boom!
Evil Female Narrator: ow.
Camera: Evil Female Narrator falls over.
Other Narrator: Now please kids remember don�t try
this at home.
Note on commercials: I came up with this idea after
too many well�sessions with my friends in ICQ chat.
We do a little role-playing in them and it usually
extends through dinner. So when one of us leaves for
a while we do commercials. That�s why I thought of
doing something like this for an Omake.
End of Commercials.
Things I find scary in the world of anime:
1. An anime movie being in the Guiness Book of World
Records.
2. In the new dubbed episodes of Sailor Moon they are
actually calling them Sailor Soldiers.
3. Pokemon still being popular.
4. Rachel Lillis trying to do more and more voices
that all sound the same.
5. A babies first word being Pikachu (which I read it
was somewhere).
6. Cartoon Network putting a good TV show Tenchi on
Toonami.
7. Pokemon releasing a second movie.
8. A Ryo-Ohki plush doll.
9. An online internet site featuring a psychiatrist
who helps with Anime, Internet, and Game addictions.
10. And the scariest thing in the world of Anime:
Pokemon costume patterns in craft stores for Halloween
since December of last year�and them selling out in
less than five minutes. While at the price of 20
dollars a pattern.
End of Scary Stuff.
The Meaning of Life as said by Xellos:
Xellos: I am here before all of you today to tell you
what I consider the meaning of life in this world. I
am giving this speech because I was not in the above
fic yet�I came to the conclusion on all this about 300
years ago. And I have tested it ever since. As you
know I am one of the most powerful and oldest monsters
in the world and know quite a bit about the world. I
solemnly vow that I came upon these conclusions upon
watching humans complete their lives. I have given
some humans immortality to test my views and they seem
to hold fast even given an indefinite amount of time.
So please ladies, gentleman, Mazkous, and
others�please let me tell you all the meaning of
existence. Since the beginning of time�
Camera: 5 hours later.
Xellos: And in closing�the meaning of life�is�a
secret!
Filia: You mean we sat through all of that for five
hours just for that stupid line! Damn you monsters
you never change! I wasn�t in the fic either but you
don�t see me doing something as stupid as that!
Prince Phil: Well said Mr. Xellos well said. You are
indeed a wise man.
Lina: You know Gourry I feel happy for you at least
you can fall to sleep at the drop of a hat.
Shabranigdou: Well that was a complete waste of time.
Looks like I should go and destroy something to finish
up the day.
Booming Voice: You think that was a waste of time I
had to write all of it.
Shinji Ikari: I musn�t run away. I musn�t run away!
Notes on the Meaning of Life: I have no idea why I
wrote this. I probably shouldn�t have wrote this. I
just felt like writing a whole bunch of nonsense for
no reason what so ever to kill time. Man that was
pathetic. All my readers probably knew what was going
to happen at the end of it�so in closing�Readers no
baka.
End of The Meaning of Life.
Written By Frank Rice.
Date of Beta Versions Completion: 4/28/2000
Time Taken To Write: Three days on and off.
Revision Date: 6/24/2000.
Second and last Revision Date: 6/26/2000.
Posted on site: 6/26/2000.
Favorite Quote from any Anime Series as of 6/24/2000:
�Not the egg its mine.�
Favorite Weapon in an Anime series: Filia�s mace.
The 2000 Stanley Cup Champions: New Jersey Devils.
Team to laugh at because they suck and always have:
Dallas Stars.
Team that broke and made lots of records this season:
New Jersey Devils.
Team that broke a Stanley Cup winning streak by
losing: Dallas Stars.
Only goalie to score a GWG: Martin Broduer, New Jersey
Devils.
Only goalie to mix up Nyquil and Dayquil: Ed Belfour.
The Best team in the NHL: The New Jersey Devils!
Hockey and anime my two favorite things in the
world�with a close third being computers and video
games�
__________________________________________________
Do You Yahoo!?
Get Yahoo! Mail - Free email you can access from anywhere!
http://mail.yahoo.com/