Well, this is a rather weird story idea that stemmed from a highly insane
conversation. I'll just let you read it and make up your own mind.
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Damned If You Do...
An EVAfic from OhGodsNo Productions
"The Angel has reached the fourth district!"
"Launch Unit 01!"
Shinji emerged from the catapult and looked around. There! The Angel
was leaping from rooftop to rooftop through the city, coming towards
him.
Misato's face appeared on the HUD. "Shinji, get in close!"
"I'm doing it!"
He ran forward, giant EVA footfalls pounding the concrete. The Angel
seemed to look up, towards him, as it leapt onto another building.
He pulled out the progressive knife and got ready to charge.
"Go!"
Now he sprinted at it, the knife held up to strike.
The Angel leapt at him, and he swung the knife up in front of him.
Its immense body landed right on top of him, and it wrapped its arms
around him. Unit 01 collapsed under the weight, the EVA's head
thunking into the concrete.
"Neutralise its field!"
"I'm trying!"
"Hold on, I'm sending Units 00 and 02!"
Shinji continued to wrestle with the Angel, trying to bring the
knife up, but the creature's claws held it firm. The Angel's breath
wafted over Unit 01's face as it opened its mouth.
"What's that!"
*Something* shot out of the Angel's mouth, burying itself in the
EVA's chest.
"What is that! What's it doing!"
"AT field penetrated! Rei, Asuka, get it off him!"
Shinji could see Rei and Asuka grappling with the Angel, trying
desperately to get it off him. Suddenly, the Angel convulsed above
him, and he felt a shuddering jolt.
"What's it doing! I can feel it doing something to the EVA!"
Realisation dawned.
"AAH! It's... It's in the EVA's skin! My skin! I can feel it!"
"Shinji, that's not your body!"
"AAAH!!!!"
"Get it off him now!"
+What do you want, Shinji?+
"What? What was that?!"
"We can't get it off!"
"Shoot it!"
+All is possible, Shinji.+
"Shoot it now!"
+You have a choice.+
"It's talking to me!"
"The Angel is trying to communicate?!"
"Shoot it!"
"No!"
+Your destruction is inevitable.+
The noise of a pallete rifle firing came into Shinji's awareness. It
seemed to be a long, long way away.
+You have your choice of end.+
"Life signs are very faint!"
"Shinji!"
+What will it be, Shinji? What shall bring your doom?+
"Shoot it! Again!"
Shinji concentrated. "But... But I don't want to die!"
+That is not a choice you are being given. Now choose the means of
your destruction.+
"I don't understand! I don't want to die!"
+You have only to think of the means of your annihilation. It shall
appear.+
"No!"
+You will choose the means of your obliteration, and the
obliteration of all your kind.+
"Misato!"
"Shinji! Are you alright?! Keep shooting it Asuka!"
"Misato! The Angel's talking to me!"
+Tell them.+
"It wants me to choose something to destroy everything!"
+And you will choose.+
"It says I just have to think of something."
"Then don't think of anything, Shinji! Don't think of anything!"
"I..."
***
Asuka turned around as she heard a massive thud behind her.
"What was that?"
Misato appeared on the HUD. "We're getting readings from something
else!"
"Another Angel?"
"No... No, it's not an Angel!"
Rei's face popped up. "The Angel on Unit 01. It appears to be dead."
"Shinji? Did you kill it Shinji?"
"I... I don't think so..."
More thuds. Like footsteps.
Asuka looked around again. "Shinji, you didn't..."
She glanced sideways at a flash of movement. Something big had moved
there.
"Shinji, you didn't!"
Something big, moving through the city.
"Shinji, what did you think of?!"
"I... I couldn't help it!"
Something big and white. White and puffy.
"Shinji, what did you think of, you dummkopf?!"
Puffy?
"I just thought..."
Whatever it was, it was coming in fast.
"It doesn't matter!" Said Misato. "All of you, get ready to fight
it!"
"Shinji, what did you think of?!"
"I thought it'd be harmless!"
Asuka caught a glimpse of a giant round shape moving above a low
building, and then it was gone.
"What is it, Shinji?!"
"Well... Well, you know that movie we saw?"
That round thing had to have been at least as high as an EVA's head.
"Which movie?!"
"The old one, about the ghosts!"
"Shinji, you didn't!!!"
"I couldn't help it!"
"You bl�d anta-baka idioten dummkopf!!!"
Asuka turned to face the giant puffy humanoid form that appeared
from between the buildings. She cursed Shinji again and again. The
immense sailor's cap on the thing's head bobbed as it moved, but she
could still make out the characters on the cap's brim that spelled
out the words 'STAY PUFT'.
"Shinji, if we get out of this, I'm going to kill you!"
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Author's Notes:
Well, I expect by now you've determined something of the nature of the
conversation this story came from.
I'm telling you, I couldn't help it! ^_^
This fic was written and edited in an hour, so that probably shows.
On an entirely trivial note, while I was writing the bit where Misato is
shouting 'Shoot it!' the image in my head was the opening scene from
'Jurassic Park', where the raptor's cage gets opened. Don't ask.
WinAmp(TM) is now playing: Marilyn Manson-The Beautiful People
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"Gott ist in seinem Himmel, alles gut mit der Welt"
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