And Ranma... feeling that the mood has gone too sour wiped the drying
blood on Nabiki's cheek. "Is this the way you return? Soaked in blood and
getting Kodachi get to your nerves?"
That should be "...letting Kodachi get on your nerves?"
"She's actually trying to win the children over, and she has never done
that! She tried to be *polite*, and when did you ever she Kodachi being
polite? This amnesia thing, it's new, it's unpredictable and it's
unpredictability is its greatest danger -- and we don't even know if she
really *has* amnesia. She's being spontaneous! I've never seen her
spontaneous! She has this twisted mind that manipulates everything she
says!
She's actually dropped her laugh--"
"... and when have you ever seen Kodachi being polite?"
"You lost the right to call them that after you caused me my first
child." Nabiki answered as she turned her back to Akane, "You will never
refer to him as that again."
"...after you cost me my first child."
There might be others, but I didn't pick them up as I was going a long.
I like this story... good stuff.
I don't think that "Shogun" is a good source to use for your fic. Too many
inaccuracies make it unreliable. The smart money is on grabbing a couple
books on Japanese history and using them as your basis for your setting,
etc. If you want Edo era Japan (1604-1868) then I'd recommend Modern Japan
by Mikiso Hane
A history of Christianity in Japan; Roman Catholic, Greek Orthodox, and
Protestant Missions by Otis Cary
A history of Christianity in Japan by Richard Henry Drummond
The Taming of the Samurai: Honorific Individuals and the making of Modern
Japan by Eiko Ikegami
Japan before Perry: A short History by Conrad Totman
I hope that helps some...
J