----- Original Message -----
From: Chester Albert G Casta�eda <gab_ab@edsamail.com.ph>
To: <ffml-bounce@fanfic.com>; FFML <ffml@fanfic.com>
Cc: <keiichi@i-manila.com.ph>
Sent: Thursday, May 04, 2000 2:07 PM
Subject: [FFML] C&C][GTP] [Spoilers] ficTHoOM TimeRunner Reprise 1
<Ok...this is like what I've discussed before in the "differences"
section. Briefer. You explored areas of the fic not explored
before...instead of a simple rewrite that a.) explores nothing new b.)
longer than something brief, which felt like an "overstatement." Does this
revised reprise do anything about it? Yup! Instead of the tired old
stammering, reluctant male in front of a woman in undies, let's have the
clueless girl instead. Background Asuka is best...I mean, she's not the
one "merging" with Shinji, right? The "cheap literary device" of
counter-bass, counter-melody, bass, melody works well with that profound
pseudo-"stream of consciousness" thing happening between Shinji and Rei.
Anyways, it's a better reprise, for sure.>
Thanks. I found out that I do my best writing late in the evening, when
I'm supposed to be fast asleep.
<snip>
<And a different ending. At least no gluing of anyboy's door. ^^ It's a
rework, alright...but, one question...is it a better ending? Going for the
psychological haikus and a more profound thing? Well, I for one love it.
^^ This rendition reminds me more of Ghost in the Shell than the original
did (spoiler alert in following paragraph to anyone who cares...).
Well, that's because I enjoy psycho-drama, and I'd like to think it
translates well into my writing. I'm one of the few people who actually
enjoyed episodes 25 and 26 of Evangelion, understood Akira (I think!), and
collected the entire Lain series.
As for Ghost in the Shell? I'm giving spoiler space for it.
< - - - S P O I L E R S P A C E - - - >
(begin spoiler) I really liked the ending for GitS. The cybernetic cop
babe Major Motoko Kusanagi (having a clone of herself in the "Amerimanga"
comic, Darkminds) is an officer of who wants to find her humanity amidst
all her robotic shell (Hence "Ghost in the Shell"). And she finds it in
the strangest place...an artificial life form calling himself the puppet
master who, from being just an instrument of the police, becomes a whole
new life form altogether. That's the gist of it all. In the near end of
the movie, Kusanagi and the puppet master practically merge into each
other (like...oh, I dunno, Rei and Shinji?)...thus, Kusanagi becomes just
more than a shell of her former self (end of spoiler).
I know, and Kusanagi's unified mind resides in the child body. Cool stuff.
< - - - E N D S P O I L E R - - - >
But I actually wasn't thinking of GitS when I wrote this (at least not
consciously). I was listening to Lain music and Sting's rendition of 'You
Were Meant For Me'. Oh, and I had the first EVA graphic novel sitting next
to me.
<That is why I find the movie so much like this fic in general.
Scriviner wrote a fic that has already the makings of a Eva-deep
psychology lesson. From what I saw in the reprise, Scriviner downplayed
the psychological deepness part of the plot, which did serve well to make
a quite nice fic in that POV. At first, you made a fic which is a mere
rewrite of Scriviner's...ignoring this angle of the story. Yup, a cop-out,
as you say.>
I know. I was thrown off-balance by the sudden shift from Asuka to Rei in
the original, and since I was writing with the original printed and laid
out in front of me, the sharp turn threw off my writing.
I should have written it from memory instead, which is what I did here.
But change that and we have a far deeper, different, but all the more
better reprise. All the profound messages given in Ghost in the
Shell...the true meaning of life, the true meaning of humanity, all the
psycohological messages given...I can all see in this reprise. It's
amazing. Quite deep and profound...so that's why I like a lot. I like deep
and profound, but not necessarily complicated and confusing. I like a fic
with many levels. Do I like this fic better than the original?
Weeeell...no comparison, really. Only thing comes to mind is that one fic
is light and the other deep...different leagues. If anything, it's safe to
say that this is a better reprise. Aw, heck...I like this better coz I'm
into these deeper feeling and subconscious kind of things!
Oh, good. I thought you were going to cop-out. <g>
But seriously, thanks for the kind words. I'm glad you liked this version,
because I like this version better than the first reprise, too. I guess
this
means that a style that works for one kind of fic doesn't necessarily work
with another.
Oh, and the GT Project isn't about competition, in case you were
wondering. It's about showing how different writers can portray stories in
different but effective ways.
Good work!>
Thanks again.
=====
w.o.m
TimeRunner's Web Page:
http://www.geocities.com/Tokyo/Towers/7482.
=====
"Whatever," he heard her say sarcastically, although he could still hear
the grin in her voice. "You'd better not be messing around back there
while I'm gone, buster!"
"Mess around? Me? I'm hurt, Yui, truly hurt."
"Uh-huh."
"No, seriously!"
- Yui and Gendo Ikari, Neon Chronicle Evangelion 0:1