RELUCTANT BET segment 24 "The First Emperor Of China?"
various char by various other people.
---------
Akane wept aloud upon reading the postcard. "DAD!
KASUMI! NABIKI!"
The others were waiting, Nabiki having gotten the
postcard first and noting the neatly cramped handwriting.
Akane was practically glowing. "It's from Ranko! She
survived! It's postmarked from the new capital of China!"
"Oh, really, Akane?" Nabiki feigned polite interest
despite having read it several hours ago when she first got
home.
"How nice," agreed Kasumi.
"Dear Akane & Family,
Hope you are all doing well. I am sorry that I was not
able to contact you earlier, but due to the international
news blackout regarding the events in China this is my first
chance. I can't put much on this little postcard, so I'll
tell you the rest when I arrive in Japan Saturday.
Ranko"
"Tomorrow's Saturday," pointed out Soun. "Half a day of
school, then the Emperor's party is coming in."
"That's what probably delayed the letter. Security is
really up in and out of China since the Second Cultural
Revolution. The press will be having a field day." Nabiki
smirked at her sister as if she knew something little sister
didn't. "Since China closed their borders no details have
been coming out. Just that some little village in the
Bayankalas started a nationwide revolution, there's a new
Emperor now, who doesn't like the title but tolerates the
term 'Prince' in his presence."
Kasumi added a moment later. "And every story coming
out of there is more fantastic than the last. UFOs, genies,
giant robots, transforming giant robots, forests appearing
overnight, flying cities, dragons..."
"Yeah, but when Ranko gets here we'll be able to hear
directly from HER. She was there at the beginning, and
she's out now that it's ending." Akane smiled and clutched
the postcard to her chest. "My Ranko's coming back. THAT's
the important thing."
--------
The day finally came, Akane raced home from school to
bathe, put on makeup, and wear her BEST formal kimono. She
wanted everything perfect for when Ranko returned to her
life!
Akane could hardly contain herself. She loved Ranko.
Simply, unconditionally, completely. Okay, Ranko was a
dingbat. Innocent and sweet but still a dingbat. Thoroughly
clueless with regard to a lot of things. That just meant she
needed someone to look after her, to guide her and protect
her.
Akane felt she was perfect for that role.
It had been years since the incident in Ryugenzawa.
Ranko had protected her and had only been with them for a
few weeks. She'd been Akane's best friend and confidante
after the first day. Although Ranko had spent a lot of time
with Kasumi and Nabiki, Akane had gotten her first crush on
the perky little girl with the batwings and angelic
demeanor.
Akane had nightmares about her mother's death, and
Ranko had been there. Holding Akane and murmurring words of
comfort into the older girl's ear. Akane could still
remember Ranko's scent on that hot summer night,
particularly the smell of Ranko's hair. The overwhelming
feelings of peace and contentment as Akane cried it out on
Ranko's shoulder, that here was someone who *truly* cared
for her.
Akane had declared that she would marry Ranko shortly
thereafter. And then the effort made to find Ranko's mother,
even though Ranko had given them a false last name and a
story about how her REAL mother hadn't wanted her. So Ranko
had left in the night. Akane had cried for a week
afterwards.
Then a postcard had arrived. Then the occasional
precious letter. Akane had been all for hunting Ranko down.
If Ranko had to leave, then Akane would leave! She'd been
talked out of it, though it had been a trying time for all
concerned.
Now, finally, the oft-fantasized return of Ranko was
imminent. Akane changed from the kimono to a gi, what if
Ranko were in trouble!
Okay, if Ranko had been a boy, it would have been even
more perfect as far as her family was concerned. That was
okay, her love for Ranko wasn't based on some silly sexual
thing- it was pure and unsullied by such trappings.
Akane realized that she still didn't know Ranko's
REAL last name. First it had been Takahashi, then Mizuma,
and finally she'd gone by the name Saotome. It didn't
matter. Ranko was her darling precious and they'd soon be
together - the way it was supposed to be.
And she'd never let Ranko go again.
---------
Soun was riveted to the television, quickly joined by
Nabiki after school had let out. Kasumi wandered in after
listening to Akane changing clothes and her makeup the
fourth time.
The ships that pulled into the harbor were sleek and
huge. Three were simply big enough to qualify as tankers.
The one dubbed the "big momma" by the press was three times
the size of a supertanker.
Ramps from the smaller ships disgorged colorful groups
which set up a path leading to the big one. One group was
entirely composed of warrior women, their banner of a golden
dragon held proudly by a purple haired girl who looked quite
similar to the next in line.
The group from the second ship was obviously of some
exotic locale, blonde or red hair seemed dominant. They
carried a number of weapons, mainly old fashioned polearms
and other archaic weapons. Some rode TIGERS. At their head
was the banner of a winged sword.
The third and last group prompted Nabiki to call out.
"Hey, Akane! Ranko's on TV."
*ZIP!* Akane had been in the process of changing
clothes for a fifth time but came running anyway. "Oh, my
poor Ranko. What hardships have you endured?"
Zipping around at the front of the procession was a
redhaired batwinged Japanese girl of about fourteen. What
she led were a group of traditional looking soldiers,
wearing their BDU (best dress uniform), with a few really
odd ones in flight suits and the like.
The gates to the main ship opened up.
Unfortunately, that is where a middle aged TV executive
named Karano Kabuto put a commercial break. Which was
followed promptly by his becoming a middle aged ex-TV
executive.
-------
commercial break:
Ifurita is throwing blasts at Makoto Mizuhara, who is
dodging around wildly. Jinnai is cackling madly in the
background when Ifurita suddenly grinds to a halt.
JINNAI: "What are you doing, you stupid doll?! Get him!"
MAKOTO examines her. "Oh, here's your problem, you used
SUPERVOLT batteries. Hmmm. I wonder what would happen if I
put in some Re-Energizer batteries!"
Ifurita powers up like Goku, including little aura. She
addresses Makoto. "Master. What are your orders?"
Makoto blushes: "Well, I *do* have a few ideas."
Ifurita flies off into the sunset with Makoto while Jinnai
screams in futile rage.
Announcer: "Re-energizer, because so much is riding on your
batteries."
---------
The parade was in full swing. A chirpy little alu-fiend
flitting about overhead with a vidcam courtesy of Skywing
Studios.
In front were dozens of Chinese women whipping martial
arts weapons around in elegant manuevers.
Behind the Amazon contingent came a squad of high tech
soldiers marching in precision in uniforms that gleamed in
the afternoon sun.
Six months prior:
"Do they really think they can win?" Shampoo played with
the jeweled coronet idly tilted rakishly on her head while
watching the troops below.
Jared was having a tougher time of it. "No. They are
just so used to their old system, so inured, so hopelessly
dependent on the way things were that they'll fight and
bleed out their own lives rather than accept change. Many of
those who *were* in power will do anything other than
relinquish that." He sighed. "It turns out that
assassinating their top leadership only broke the country up
into petty warlords, we *still* have to kill their army."
Nene Romanova grinned within her Knight Saber helmet.
THEY'D gotten that duty, and Jay-chan had come along! Now he
trusted them enough that, with Nam and Lou and the other
sexaroids now having suits, the nine Knight Sabers were his
PERSONAL BODYGUARDS!
Which meant staying near him while he slept, of course.
Though she wished she had room in this helmet to wear her
tiara.
Sylia was already working on that for their next
design.
"Don't be so hard on yourself, Beloved Emperor."
Cologne smirked, as the only one able to get away with
calling him that, and kept her hands from brushing the tiara
at her *own* brow only through force of will. "With the
birth control policies of the former government they had
millions more men than women, from families so eager their
one child be a son to carry on the family name they drowned
their own daughters."
"It was a war waiting to happen." Sailor Mercury kept an
image in the upper left corner of her visor of herself
wearing the newly designed tiara and managed not to giggle
madly. "Those men were just coming of age. There weren't
enough women in China for them, and no combination of money
or prestige would get wives for all of them. So if they
wanted to marry, and they did, the only way to do so was
invade another country, kill those men and marry *their*
women."
"They were building up their technology for war,
rattling their sabers to get an excuse, and had the most
devoted kind of soldiers - the kind who has nothing left
behind, no wife or family, only the chance to have them by
forging ahead to take them from someone else."
Jared glanced back at Amelia Wil Tesla Sailune. That had
sounded far too reasoned and in control for the Slayer's
character.
Amelia formed a fist, eyes suddenly ablaze. "That is why
they must be struck down with the swift hand of Justice!"
"Princess Dorothy reports that the final troops are
ready." Mercury reported, and all the girls present got
hungry gleams at the word 'Princess', as it reminded them of
certain things.
His mother, Nodoka, had declared that since her son
ruled his own country he could have as many wives as she
wished... err, *he* wished, obviously, as she would leave
the choice up to him. *Hint, Hint. Nudge, Nudge, Wink.*
It had swiftly gone beyond ridiculous.
The tiara concept came floating around, inspired by who
knows what, and suddenly all the ladies able to make a claim
at engagement *stick* were wearing one. Which included all
of the Marionettes, many of the unmarried Amazons, *ALL* of
the fiancees engaged by his mom, Genma, or other family
member. Then they all started laying claim to the title of
Princess as they were betrothed to a future ruler...
Then somebody had floated the idea that once they'd
*married* him they would be Queens of China, and somebody
else had said that since it was an Empire and Jay-chan their
future Emperor there should probably be an Empress...
Then somebody *else* had declared "There can be only
one."
Jared had declared Belldandy as belonging to the future
Empress slot before there'd been any death matches over who
got it. Since then things had progressed to where each and
every girl got to fantasizing all the day long about her
upgrade to Queenly status.
i.e. Her future spectacular wedding day... and night.
Fortunately, he had a war now to distract them. Jared
looked down the field at his enemy; one of the innumerable
splinter factions whose regional leadership had declared
them independent, the "One True Successor" and any of
thousands of other titles that amounted all to petty
warlords staking their land claim so he either had to
legitimize it by leaving them alone or come in and crush
them wholesale.
It was Machiavellian - literally, but getting all the
atrocities over with at the start so they have an end and
people can forget about them, leaving no heirs to the former
throne, and breaking up the established cities into new
settlements and colonies so the people would more readily
accept their new way of life...
Yes, Machiavelli had taught them. They also happened
to work.
Frankly, leaving spots of rotten corruption to soil
the new pie was not high on the list of things he wanted to
tolerate. Corruption breeds corruption and experienced
subverters was NOT something he wanted just lying around
while he built something new. Freeing a people who had been
taught to build their own prison was a monumental task NOT
done by half
measures anyway.
He'd only grudgingly agreed to be Emperor because
he'd been finally convinced that it would solve more
problems than not. He STILL didn't like the idea. 'Teach
them correct principles and let them govern themselves.' But
something had to exist to start and as error correction.
Besides, it gave him an excuse to build new cities.
There were also Robotech Monorails using maglev technology
he was just *dying* to try. They were even based on
magnetized iron pyrite, or fool's gold, for the bed of the
track. The thought of an automated rail system using clean
technology ferrying passengers and freight around was almost
as appealing as the image of tracks that would look like
ribbons of gold.
Elevated rails so dragons, animals and nature could
proceed by undisturbed beneath, with trains essentially
silent save for the wind of passage, leaving forests as wild
and pristine as they wanted.
Then he could use an artery and hub design to
increase overall speed, add Robotech automation, make the
tracks nine feet wide because he *didn't* have to adhere to
anybody else's standard, which would give him wider, more
stable trains able to carry greater cargo more efficiently.
All that combined into an advanced, ultra-efficient
system that required almost nothing in the way of
maintenance. So once it was actually BUILT it would haul
people, packages and freight about for next to nothing!
Giving them the fastest and best system in the world by
several orders of magnitude.
For less than the price of a bus ticket one would
cross China in a matter of a couple of hours. A nickel stamp
would send a forty pound package anywhere in the Empire
overnight. Build it right from the start and you have NONE
of the airport and train delays...
Okay, the idea of China as his personal pet project
and playground in which to build was oddly appealing. He'd
handle the cost and do much of the work himself while the
people would benefit. He wouldn't even tax them! He had no
need. Everything he did he could fund himself just off of
renewable resources. Gold, silver and other precious coins
could again be the official currency, coated with a thin
film of Glassteel, which was something no nation nor
criminal on earth could duplicate, ending forgery as a
problem and inflation both (a hundred years ago five $20
gold coins would buy a car. Those same five coins would
*still* buy a car today and would continue so).
No. He had no intention of being a burden on this
people at all.
Jared looked down at the military base ringed by
tanks and hasty earthworks that was this local warlord's
idea of a defense.
"Tiger Cavalry, Forward!"
Nothing visible happened, which, when the troops
that were advancing were elves using magical invisibility
cloaks over themselves and separate drapes for their mounts,
was what one might expect. When they were halfway to target
(he could see the invisible, but what do you expect?) he
called out another order.
"Magical Arm, Lightning Barrage!"
Wands were employed, scrolls were read, and from
concealed wizards and wizardesses bolts of electric fury
raced forth to impact on tanks and artillery, causing
ammunition and fuel explosions ripping the vehicle asunder.
Then many of the lightning bolts arced on, striking
additional tanks and vehicles.
Then the Tiger Cavalry closed to range and the
riders cast spells causing enemy metals to become searing
hot, causing soldiers to fling away their firearms and die
as ammunition bandoleers cooked off. Then the armored riders
swept in with spear and sword and tiger's claws to deal with
an enemy trained with guns and unprepared for experienced
and crack
melee troops immune to nonmagic missiles - like shrapnel and
bullets.
He was not even sure the Chinese military issued
fighting knives.
Forty thousand being attacked by two hundred and
the two hundred were winning. About the time that sunk in
the enemy would either break or rally. If they rallied more
would only die. If they broke some would surrender and many
would try and hide in the mountains. But the dragons, dryads
and other things being seeded up there right now would limit
the possibility of an insurgent force forming.
Some few would escape across the borders to spread
tales of terror no one would believe.
Jared turned from the battle to regard Nene. "How
are the other forces doing?"
"Mostly the same," was his reply. "Princess
Elvraemae with the main army is still giving them things
like transforming missile tanks and low-class giant robots
so their defeat is a little more interesting. But you'll
still have to title the movie "Red Army Squashed Flat". Our
Airbats in those mecha you provided rule the skies. The new
satellite web keeps shooting down their ICBMs. You know
they've even tried firing those at *other* countries to get
them involved in the war?"
Nene's happy sound showed just how far THAT plot
had gone. Probably not far out of the launchers.
Mercury tapped some keys on her computer. "I just
got a report from Princess Beth on the moon that work on the
palace there is nearly complete. Duplicating the Silver
Millenium structures there *does* appear as though we'll
have official Silver Moon energy soon. Which means you can
start to power us up as actual Scouts instead of
marionettes, Jay-chan!"
"You'd best be wrapping this up, Beloved Emperor."
Cologne's grin was heard. "There is that diplomatic envoy to
Japan you'd promised to be part of. Take your sister, leave
the main force with us, and we'll see to things while you
are gone."
Jared directed a smirk to the ancient Amazon. There
was an informal 'point tally' system going on where those
who did best in battle or other goals got higher places in
the marriage queue. He might as well go along.
Encouraging good service was a wise thing to do.
"Sure, Cologne. Shampoo, wanna summon your giant
robot and accompany me to where the new capitol is being
built?" It was inland somewhere, with a new lake which
canals would link to the sea. He'd planned on erecting a row
Colossus statues over those canals to win points in the
culture department.
Well, mainly because he wanted to.
"Can I come too???" Echoed two dozen throats.
Jared fought a grin. Okay, it didn't help his
standard problem any... much, or maybe just as much as he'd
like. But he might have to attack China when he got home.
-----------
two months prior to "present":
Jared would have expected a lot of strange things, he
had weird luck and a strange life. Bizarre things were the
norm. Didn't mean that he wasn't occasionally caught by
surprise.
Such as seeing Sailor Mercury with her back open and
some short hunchbacked guy working on something within.
"Uhm."
"So you're the Pheonix Mage, or do you prefer 'Ashida
Sanzennin' or 'Knight Of Reason'?"
Jared noted the way the stunted figure was pulling
gadgets out and putting other things in. "How about... you
obviously know what you're doing. 'Heph' I suppose?"
"Some people call me that, Prince Rammie." Hephaestus
nodded and slapped the back into place, then pulled out a
short rod he started sealing the seams with.
Jared winced. "Only Ranko calls me that." Though he had
this HORRIBLE feeling that it was being used behind his
back. "What exactly are you doing?"
"Finished a set of upgrades, now that Mercury's been
upgraded she can help upgrade the other cyborgs."
"Cyborgs? Oh, you mean Shan and Sakyo." Jared watched
Mercury wink and go running off with a satchel of odd parts.
"Actually all the Sailor Marionettes except Serena are
cyborgs due to a dimensional merger effect. Serena,
however, has a memory template based on what Sakyo read of
the manga, plus the memories of Son Usagi from the Sailorjin
timeline. She's purely a marionette physically." Hephaestus
finished putting away his tools. "Now to upgrade the Urd,
Lorelei, Kanuka, Nabiki, and Skuld marionettes. Those will
be able to make further upgrades with the parts I'm
leaving."
"Urrr. What KIND of upgrades are we talking about?"
"Well, you wanted the Lina and Naga units to be true
spellcasters. Also annoying and capable of massive property
de-valuation, but that's your call. I upgraded the Mercury
unit with a battle computer similar to Cherry's." Hephaestus
stopped at the doorway. "Mind you, the Shan and Sakyo units
are still more *potentially* powerful. Some of my best work,
actually. You won't need to worry about them getting blown
away in the first few melee rounds at least. Oh and one
OTHER upgrade."
Jared felt this chill. "Other upgrade?"
"I'm making them Thirds," Hephaestus left with that
called out over his shoulder.
Jared spent a moment mouthing the word before rushing
out to look down at the limping technologist. "Third what?"
"Sakyo sent me a video called 'Armitage III' - a cute
idea, I thought."
Jared nodded. Okay, he thought he remembered that. A
series of OAVs dealing with near human androids, so he could
see the appeal to the marionettes. As he recalled the Third
series androids were so human that they could... actually...
...have babies. Oh dear.
------------
the "present":
The Tendo household stared en masse at the parade shown
on television. Women in Chinese clothing clashed weapons
together at the very head of the procession.
"Make way for Prince Rammie
Say hey! It's Prince Rammie!"
Nabiki estimated the Amazon contingent as being only
two dozen, and ventured the opinion that this was an elite
guard.
At the very point was a batwinged redhaired Japanese
girl twirling a baton around as if she were some majorette
and singing in a pleasing voice.
"Hey! Clear the way in the old Bazaar
Hey you!
Let us through!
It's a bright new star!
Oh Come!
Be the first on your block to meet his eye!"
"Make way!
Here he comes!
Ring bells! Bang the drums!
Are you gonna love this guy!"
The camera closed in on a young man with red hair only
a few shades different from Ranko's, seated on the back of
what appeared to be a mechanical dragon. Ranko's singing
could still be heard over the broadcast.
"Prince Rammie! Fabulous he!
Ranma of Chi-na!
Genuflect, show some respect
Down on one knee!
Now, try your best to stay calm
Brush up your sunday salaam
Then kimono and meet his spectacular coterie!"
Ranma, Emperor of China, waved at the crowd from the
midst his parade. It was a bit overdone perhaps, as few of
the crowd really seemed to notice him amongst all the
spectacles that was his 'coterie'.
"Prince Rammie!
Mighty is he!
Ranma of China!
Strong as ten regular men, definitely!
He faced the Communist huns,
With their bombs and missiles and guns,
Who beat them while using puns?
Why, Prince Rammie!"
The camera panned over things that HAD to be a
special effect. Didn't they?
"He's got seventy-five golden dragons,
And of mecha,
He's got fifty-three
When it comes to exotic-type mammals
Has he got a zoo?
I'm telling you, it's right out of fantasy!"
"Oh my. How cute!" Kasumi decided to stick to safe
comments for the moment. The singing changed from a solo by
Ranko to a chorus of female voices.
"Prince Rammie! Handsome is he, Ranma of China!
That physique! How can I speak
Weak at the knee
Well, get on out in that square
Adjust paradigm and prepare
To gawk and grovel and stare at Prince Rammie!"
Nabiki stared at the next sequence, her hands
unconsciously clutching and unclutching as if she wanted to
reach into the TV and grasp the shovelfuls of money being
thrown about.
"He's got ninety-five veritech mecha
(He's got the mecha, let's see the mecha)
And to view them he charges no fee
(He's generous, so generous)
He's got soldiers, he's got servants and flunkies!
(Proud to work for him)
They bow to his whim, love serving him
They're just lousy with loyalty to Rammie! Prince Rammie!"
The camera panned away from the money being thrown
into the crowd, to everyone's relief. Nabiki had been
quivering as if she were ready to explode from sheer envy.
"Prince Rammie!
Amorous he! Ranma of China!
Has an honor debt to which he must see,
And that, good people, is why he got dolled up and dropped
by,
With sixty mages, high tech galore
With Amazons and tigers
A brass band and more
With his forty mages, his cooks, his bakers
His birds that warble on key
Make way for prince Rammie!"
---------
Another universe:
Queen Beryl was more than a little put off by the
appearance of Sailor Moon. Appearing in her throne room
without having apparently walked anywhere else in the Arctic
complex.
"So, Sailor Moon, you have come here to DIE!" Beryl
quickly noted that Sailor Moon wasn't wearing her usual
Senshi costume, but that wasn't as important as the fact
that she was ALONE!
"Huh? Oh, it's you." The blonde with the really long
pigtails looked around her. "Well, THIS can't be right!"
Beryl twitched. Sailor Moon had turned her back on her!
How stupid! ~Forget the minions, I'll deal with her myself!~
"DIE!"
"You said that already," Usagi Son commented, holding
out a hand to intercept the energy blast with. "Well, I
suppose you WON'T just go away and leave me alone."
The doors to the chamber burst open, revealing hundreds
of minions. As well as Malachite, Nephrite, and a general
who was dressed *completely* inappropriately for a fight
sequence. The ducky slippers and nightgown really didn't do
a thing for his image, but when the Dark Queen summons you
out of bed...
"I guess not," said Usagi, sounding bored. "Oh well.
Hey, why we make this *interesting!*"
"Why don't you just die!" Beryl was now shooting black
lightning with both hands and still the stupid girl acted
like she wasn't paying attention. "Minions! Attack!"
Generals directed their minions forward. The swarm
quickly covered the target.
"I don't have time for this," came a voice from within
the dogpile. "Super Sailorjin III!"
The minion pile melted away, literally, streamers of
gore briefly pulling away from pulverizing skeletons.
Standing in a circle that was burning itself through the
floor, "Sailor Moon's" eyes had turned glacial blue and her
hair was whipping about as if by an unseen wind. "This is
Super Sailorjin III, Beryl-san. Let me give you a gift to
take with you to Hell... Super Sailorjin IV!"
Beryl's eyes widened unnaturally as Sailor Moon
changed again.
Jadeite saw the news of the explosion in the Arctic,
realized why he hadn't heard anything from his home base,
and that he was now out of a job. No support, no base, no
allies, no...
Jadeite smiled as he realized that HE was now the
ruler of the Dark Kingdom. Time to make plans. After all,
the only opponents he had were a bunch of snot-nosed kids.
Right?
--------
Target timeline:
Nabiki stared at the tower that had appeared at the
empty lot across from her home. On some level deep within
there was something she recognized about it, but she was far
too busy in the more foremost portions of her mind just
being amazed at how it *got* there! Only just passing it
after school that field had been empty, now there was a hill
and a tall white tower with mature landscaping.
Oh, and a hasty sign erected, saying "Chinese Embassy,
to declare war please use rear entrance."
On the roof there was a quad mount of what was
supposed to resemble a laser, she was sure. Then a towering,
fifty foot robot walked around the building from behind, and
while Nabiki's hair was suddenly trying to run its own space
program she got the impression that maybe it *wasn't* a fake
after all.
Akane's voice shouted back from within the house.
"Nabiki! The commercials are over, get back in here!"
Nabiki disappeared in a swirl of blouse and shorts,
leaving a dust cloud behind her to linger in the air. The
VCR was running, recording this, but live footage could
hardly be beat and something might go wrong with the tape,
right?
Actually, various takes of this would probably be on
the shelf for years!
****
Forty pure white mastadons reared back on their hind
legs and trumpeted, dropping back to their feet only to tuck
and roll in a display animal trainers worldwide would be
forever unable to duplicate no matter how much money circus
and movie people paid them.
Some would claim it was the shortage of mastadons.
Others that he got other creatures to do tricks nobody else
could accomplish. The falcons flying in perfect unison, like
the best calibre synchronized Olympic swimmers in forming
beautiful fractal patterns, breaking up into other patterns
and just performing a mind-dazzeling array of acrobatics
over the parade would sort of bear that out. So mostly
people would just settle for hiring Chinese circuses (when
they could get them).
Kasumi inhaled a long gasp when the television showed
them a parade within the parade of perfectly formed white
horses, gorgeously caparisoned, and with riders in
glittering plate armor so silver it looked to have been
chromed. Gaily colored plumes were waving, banners flying,
and the scene so fairy-tale alluring that girlhood dreams of
knights and white horses came back to her and she wondered
what it would be to have a prince like that carry her off.
"Akane, sit down. Your head is blocking my view."
"I'm looking for Ranko!"
"I'm sure she'll be here in a while, now please don't
block the view."
ZIP!! "THERE SHE IS!!!"
Nabiki resisted the powerful urge to take out a marker
and draw on Akane while her sister was blocking the screen.
As the seconds grew, she...
*splash!* "Oh dear, Akane. You have a tea stain on
your clothes. Do you want to meet Ranko with..."
"ACK!!!!" Eyes bulged. Zip!! "I'LLBEBACKINAMINUTE
BUTYOUHAVETORECORDEVERYTHING ANDTELLMEWHAT'SGOINGON!!!!"
Nabiki and Kasumi met glances, then turned back to the
TV. A pavilion of bronze cloth was being carried on poles
stretched betwen twelve mastadons. The sides of the tent
were rolled up and within amounted to a gorgeous feast to
the eyes by any stretch of the imagination.
There were baskets, *BASKETS* of glittering jewels and
endless ropes of pearls. Food was arrayed in colorful
spledor and lovely girls and muscled men dressed in exotic
fashions were flinging rolls, bread, fruit and melons into
the crowd, along with the occassional jewel or gem.
"Nabiki, please get off the screen." Soun protested.
When the money-hungry girl was eventually pried back off
the set (when the scene changed) they saw riders standing
upon the backs of their tiger mounts shooting arrows which
became flowers and fluttered down on the crowd. Doves were
dive bombing the spectators, delivering candied
chocolates...
"Man sure spent alot of money." Soun commented.
Nabiki twitched.
***
The SMJ timeline:
"Oh, Doctor Lorelei, if you'd look at this." The
marionette tapped out a few keys on the computer, changing a
display. "i couldn't make a lot of changes on the basic
structure without making major changes in the production
facilities. However, if we make these alterations in the
structure of the tendon you sacrifice a tiny bit of strength
and gain a much higher degree of flexibility and parts
longevity."
Lorelei blinked and examined the composite structure on
the screen. "A 5% loss of power, traded for 15% greater
motility and 55% increase in the durability. Not something
for the combat units, obviously, but for the commercial
everyday models quite useful."
Ginseng nodded. "Well, since i'm here, i might as well
be useful."
"That isn't why I came here though. There's still no
word from inside the complex, but we're showing intermittent
power use inside. The security is active, and there's power
in a few compartments but the outer layers remain dead."
Lorelei hesitated for a moment. "It looks as though it's
been abandoned."
"i have Grey's memories, but i am just a marionette, -
therefore expendable, is that it?" Ginseng shook her head.
"No, i'm sorry. i know better. i'll try. If nothing else,
i'd need that facility to return to a male body styling."
"You'll disappoint Gennai-ojisan," joked Lorelei
briefly.
Ginseng smiled a little in return. "Will he even notice
now that his Gemini unit has a 'maiden circuit'? It's about
time the old man got some affection in his life. Lord knows
how hard that can be to come by."
***
Target Timeline:
Jared was astride a giant white rabbit, complete with
Wonderland saddle, when his attention was drawn to his
watch. Checking the vibrating instrument and learning the
code, he took out his Nerd Toy and used its cellphone
configuration, completing it in just a few moments.
~Grey's gone, off being Ranma somewhere *else*?
That's a switch, guy can't even take a vacation when I'm
doing his job for him.~ He checked the Ally Update screen
once again. ~Back to male... silver dragon? Hmm, I must ask
him if we can strike a bargain about his teeth, Serenity was
NOT forthcoming. Uh Oh, love interests. I'd better avoid
that guy right about
now or, due to observable effects, I'll somehow pull them
all away from him.~
A chorus of marionettes danced past as the mounts paused
for a display in some plaza.
~And it's not like I need any more of them.~
The watch vibrated again and the superspy checked the
code. ~Oh. My. Word.~ His face opened in wide speculation as
he considered something. A source had just reported that a
certain spellbook had become available, something he'd been
wanting to get ahold of for his entire career as a magic
user.
There was a wry grin. ~Nobody will miss me for a bit,
right?~
The Mage cast a spell, sending out a telepathic pulse to
his followers, which unfortunately did *NOT* include any of
his marionettes or other tag-alongs like Belldandy, and then
cast an invisibility spell that was proof against anything
short of true godly intervention and planeshifted, beginning
to lay a track that would be hard if not impossible to
follow, leading first through Pandemonium in order to throw
off any trace.
Where he was right now had been the focus of *entirely*
too much attention. Leading any of that to a plane that he
cared about was ASKING for trouble later on. Besides, he
didn't want any competition bidding for that spellbook.
Things like the Detect Enemies spell, Aggregate
Gemstone... No, there was stuff there he didn't want to
miss, and it wouldn't stay for sale for long.
The audience blinked as *something* happened. Then
realized that the Emperor had just done more "out of his
hat" magic. Imagine, trading in a mechanical dragon for a
white rabbit and then changing that to a snow-white pegasus.
And SOME people merely changed their clothes with this sort
of frequency.
Celeste grumbled about this whole thing and double
checked her "Impersonate Ranma" spell. If it wasn't one
thing... She thought for a moment then reached for her, err
his, cellphone. "Celeste here. The Ranma here bailed and I'm
filling in before we get a critical cross-juncture. I know.
I KNOW. No, I *DON'T* know why he bailed, that guy keeps
enough safeguards up to keep a battallion of mindreaders
confused. Look, the last person to get tagged for this duty
was the local Urd. As soon as I can brief her... YES, trust
me, I know full well how much a mismatch that is. You think
that's bad, just wait till all these marionettes and cyborgs
and 'Ranko' find out that 'Prince Rammie' has flown the
coop. Not to mention that the Cologne from HIS universe just
arrived on the parade route."
Celeste held the cellphone away from her ear briefly.
"You think we gotta choice? We can't get Grey out of THAT
timeline yet, and we don't have a suitable candidate for
this job or do you think Urd can play the part of a shy if
abrasive GUY who only knows martial arts and nearly goes
into a coma at the hint of physical intimacy? Right. Well, I
*have* pulled some work with the Valkyrie Reserve. Mainly
spear and shield work, oh and I've pulled some work with
hovercraft and pegasi. Yeah. Don't take that tone of voice
with ME, Apollo! Or do YOU want to do this? What? You *do*
have someone else? Who?"
Celeste's eyes bugged. "HIM?! Are you out of your
freaking mind?! A mainline Ranma has about as much chance of
being crowned Queen Of England as he has of pulling this
off! The Pheonix Mage was a better choice! Why? Because if
he'd kept it up, THIS plane would have merged with his
homeplane and he'd have been back home without the
dimensional barrier problems."
Ranko went winging overhead, knowing somehow that
something was wrong.
"Look, if you want to put HIM in the Ranma spot, that's
your own lookout. How did you even get him to agree to it?"
Celeste winced at the reply.
While she was busy with her cellphone, screams and
cries among the crowd caught her attention. The Pheonix
Mage's troops were deploying all around her and some fifty
squads of marionettes, amazons, and elves were looking
toward her for what to do as dozens of Red Army battle-bots
(carefully smuggled away from their defeats by clever
commanders for just this sort of opportunity) sprang from
ambush around their parade. Machineguns from the crude enemy
mecha spoke and rattled against hastily erected anti-missile
spells.
Valkyrie Reserve was one thing, finding herself in the
midst of an ambush was another. Valkyries at least had time
and warning about their fights, and many just observed
anyway. Celeste came dangerously close to freezing.
Suddenly she felt a friendly tap on her shoulder.
"Thanks, whoever you are. I'll take it from here." Celeste
skedaddled to the sidelines, dropping her Ranma
impersonation, *then* looked back to see who'd taken over
for her.
The Pheonix Mage, calmly reassured by the spellbook in
his pocket, waved two signals to his troops in Battlesign,
causing them to fall back and deploy in a different manner.
Even the rabbit he'd once more been standing on hopped
clear.
The Mage cleared his throat into his hand while cannon
blasts raked the ground all around him, then threw his fist
skyward. "Fire Angel!"
There followed a *truly* impressive mecha summoning
sequence.
As the illusion progressed (in reality, Jared had just
let the illusion do all the special effects while he simply
took his old veritech out of stuff space) he regretted that
special conditions required him to store this with almost no
disposable armaments. His veritech he could fit in
stuffspace, yes. Missiles and cannon rounds were almost more
trouble than they were worth, though he struggled and got
SOME cannon ammo in there, just as being disarmed was too
highly unpleasant to think on.
The trick he used to store this vehicle in stuff space
was simply thus: items which had been charged with their own
chi (a chi mastery technique and almost unheard of even
among masters - just because it's utility was questionable
as compared to, say, blowing things up or healing), but
again, items which had their own charge of chi required
almost no space to store with Hidden Weapons techniques.
And yes, Jared had literally gone pound by pound, giving
his veritech chi; artificial systems and composite alloys
and electronics and all, expending huge amounts with a cost
like Ranma blasting a mountainside away via Tiger Blasts.
Made it nasty when he had to replace armor.
Anyway, he was deranged enough to have imparted chi to
his veritech. He was NOT so hot about going through all that
effort for a few missiles when he'd used them in seconds and
be without again. There were limits to his perfundity.
The truly amazing mecha summoning sequence came to an
end, and Jared posed his veritech in a stylish and
aggressive way, then proceeded to bat around his enemy's
mecha in straight up hand-to-hand.
It would hardly do to disappoint his audience.
--------
Air rippled in a set of three rings in the air over
China. This was enough to scramble a reconn plane.
Two adolescent girls and a slightly younger one flew on
to a gleaming alabaster city and landed, looking about
themselves with curiosity.
"Think this is the right one yet?" Haruka Uranus looked
about at the pathetic power levels of the natives and
sighed. So much for getting into a good fight.
"It *feels* right, but does not seem to have him."
"Phooey," said Hotaru in response to Michiru's comment.
"Maybe..."
"You're going to give up and let Usagi get this 'Ranma'
fellow?" Haruka was tired of this chase herself.
It wasn't Hotaru but Michiru who answered. "This
particular haystack is really too difficult to manage by the
current search methods. What we need is a better method of
narrowing the search down. If nothing else becomes available
we'll *have* to abandon this search."
"True." Haruka grinned at Michiru. "I can think of much
better ways to pass the time."
Hotaru merely rolled her eyes. ~What, again?!~
*****
The voice on his veritech's commlink was as familiar as
it was unexpected. "Jay-chan, it's Susan."
Jared stared into space for a moment. "How?"
"Cologne provided data much in the manner of a 'Forward
Observer' does for artillery. We need you back here.
Nephelenia is readying some massive attack using the Nemesis
crystal to empower some sort of battle mecha."
Jared looked out over the crowd, to see a blue-haired
Amazon wave at him from her position on a roof. "The
barriers?"
"I *am* Sailor Pluto. As it is too powerful to dismiss,
I'm ready to invert it at a critical moment. It'll only last
a few minutes and likely only work once, but it'll be an
opening."
Jared weighed responsibilities briefly. There really
was only one choice. "How long before we can get there?"
Celeste muttered under her breath as she got ready to
recast her "Impersonate Ranma" (actually a simple Disguise)
spell.
As the signal was not for an emergency drop, most of
the parade waited until they'd gotten to a good stopping
point, then dispersed before dimensionally gating.
--------
"This is not the right timeline," Jared noted. "I thought
you had to be a member of the RRO to end up in strange
timelines willy-nilly."
Shan chuckled at the phrase, thinking it some clever turn
of phrase that her Master had developed on the fly.
Makoto cocked her head to the side, causing her ponytail
to swish to the side. "I sense... chi. One dark chi, fairly
powerful. Two brighter points, also powerful. One I'm not
sure of, it slumbers but it seems... twisted somehow."
"Oh my." Belldandy's sensitivity gave her a similar
picture. "We must be here for a reason."
Urd didn't pick it up, but thought for a moment. "Well,
we won't find out anything if we stay here."
"Well, a Dimension Door ought to take care of this."
Jared suited action to words, the spell so simple and
well-practiced that he could cast it in his sleep. (Which
had caused a few embarassing moments when he was sleeping
around the Sailor Scouts...)
"Master Qui-gon?!"
Everyone stared for a moment at the sight of a guy (?) in
black robes with a double bladed light saber who had just
thrust one of those blades through the chest of some guy who
also had a light saber.
"A TARGET!" Jared had a wild grin. "Magic Missile!"
The horned figure with the red and black face blocked the
sparkling missiles with a quick spin of his light saber.
Jared's grin actually intensified as he drew a katana
which pulsed hungrily on sensing the presence of evil. "Oh
yeah, time to par-tay!"
Belldandy stepped to the side of the fallen warrior.
"Healing!"
Shan watched briefly, noting a warrior similarly dressed
to the fallen one waiting helplessly behind a Level 3.8
containment field. Disrupting the field would be easy, but
also introduce an unknown element.
Makoto, however, was a person prone to act. She levitated
up and to the side. "KAME..."
Energy blade met a katana rune weapon, emitting sparks as
both strove to overwhelm the other. The two wielders eyes
met briefly before blades and bodies both blurred.
Jared leapt over a wide sweep and stabbed out in a
thrust. His opponent changed the sweep into a spin. Jared
landed behind him and swept around in a decapitating move
that the horned being avoided by a hairsbreadth.
Makoto continued to build energy between her hands.
"HAME..."
Shan locked on and compensated for the speed of the
warriors. "THUNDER..."
Jared blocked a swing and made a gesture with his free
hand. "Globe of Force."
"HA!"
"...BOLT!"
The horned figure spun his light sabre around, knocking
both attacks towards the other attack's originator. Shan
absorbed the chi blast while Makoto dissipated the
electricity.
"Well then," Makoto said with a grin. "Looks like we'll
have to settle this a bit differently."
Darth Maul raised a hand and thrust it at the flying girl
with the staff.
"Telekinetic attack of unknown nomenclature. Analyzed."
Shan blocked with her staff and seemed to think. "Esper
field pattern determined. Combat patterns analyzed. Energy
blade patterns analyzed."
"Huh?" Makoto said.
Jared spun, dodged, thrust, slashed, blocked, leapt and
was otherwise having a grand old time.
"Analysis of waveform usage in esper bands analyzed."
Shan seemed to consider for a moment, then shrunk her staff
down to a rod. "Duplicating energy sword. Duplicating esper
field."
"SHAN! NO! Don't duplicate his esper field," Jared said
while lazily parrying blows. It appeared his opponent was
beginning to tire. Which merely meant he was trying to fake
Jared out. "Jam it."
"Applying countermeasure. Transmitting 'A Very Barney
Christmas' on frequency."
"That *may* qualify as cruel and unusual punishment,"
quipped Urd with a wince.
"There, there, all better," said Belldandy to Qui-gong.
"Please, shut it off, shut it off!" Qui-gong winced as
the awful images continued.
Jared could have sworn that Darth Maul actually LET
himself be decapitated on his sword. Could it be THAT bad?
He seized the body by the front of its robe to preserve the
thing's genetic samples and evidence for tracking down its
Master. As the head was now bouncing down the shaft of a
planetary reactor's heating core he felt it a small danger.
"Shan? Stop transmitting, poor Obi-wan looks like he's
about to go into shock and Qui-gong may die again. Some
weapons are entirely too terrible to be used." He smacked
his lips briefly in thought. "So save me a copy of that
file, I'll need to watch it later in case any of my enemies
use it against me."
He met Shan's mischievious glance. Suddenly they were
shoulder to shoulder and singing. "I love you, you love
me..."
"Aaagrhhhh!!" Qui-gong screamed amidst twitches.
Both stopped, and Jared shook his head. "I sense much
fear in you."
-----------
Nehelenia readied her attack, her link to the Dark
Crystal opening to allow large amounts of dark power flowing
through her. Enough for her to materialize hundreds of her
mirror clones.
With a laugh worthy of Naga the White Serpent, the
Mirror Queen sent her troops sweeping out to surround the
funeral that the Scouts were holding for that boyfriend of
theirs and bring them down. She would destroy them all in
one moment of dark glory!
The air ripped open. Four Veritechs wearing the blazon
of NewChina shot through the opening, followed by ninety
nine combat ready marionettes, followed by destroids and war
mastodons, Chinese Amazons, elven calvary, dwarven space
marines, and a dizzying array of high tech and fantasy
warcraft.
And one Makoto "Lita" Jupiter who exclaimed in girlish
glee. "TARGETS! Oh, Jay-chan, you shouldn't have! Thank
you!"
Shan merely powered up and extended her sensors.
Sakyo was already duplicating Rally Vincent and had her
hands on a heavy caliber sonic cannon.
Belldandy opted for an "oh my" and readying her spirit
wards.
Nehelenia blinked. She was the "bad guy" - her forces
were supposed to outnumber the "good guys" - it was a rule
wasn't it? Well, she'd just back off now and wait for a
better chance. Let the minions probe these new threats out
and discover their weaknesses.
She'd be back.
WEIRD IDEAS:
A Ranma who is SO over the top you'd get nosebleed just
talking to him.
A character from another series trying to play Ranma.
Imagine Keiichi Morisato trying to play the part, or worse -
Shinji Ikari. Broken whining as Akane pounds on him for
being such a weenie.
-------------------------------
"If at first you don't succeed, upgrade your
weapon."
-Grey, Reluctant Bet
metroanime@mindspring.com
http://metroanime.home.mindspring.com/