Jaime Wilde wrote:
My apologies for not getting to this one sooner, Mr Sommer.
Don't worry about it. My mottos is it's never too late for C+C. Lord knows
I give some a lot more than a week after some fics are posted
First, some general comments before I get specific. Ladies and
gentlemen, if you want a good laugh, look no further than this 'fic.
It's also got fan service, mistaken identities, evil godlike suits of
armor, penis jokes, heartfelt moments of introspection, packs of rabid
albino alligators, C.H.U.D.s, and of course, those three lovely
ninjettes; Mai, Tai, and B.J.
What, no mention of six-inch wish giving dolls and their poorly conceived
plans for world misery? :)
Snipped most of the grammar stuff since I'll use them.
something to rub in Shampoo's face the next time she tried pulling her
superiority act on her.
"I do not see why I must travel with the likes of you. Why can I not
accompany Akane Tendou?"
You need more of a break here to illustrate that we have not only
changed point of view, but have gone to an entirely different scene.
Hmm. I've always gone with a two-line break to signify scene changes in my
fics. Odd that this piece is getting comments about it. Will consider
adding 'x's or or something then.
you would. What magic armor could resist a warrior of my wit and charms?
Truly it was destiny for us to meet. Let it be known from this day
forward
that The Blue Thunder, Tatewaki Kunou, will never be bested by mortal
man
again."
[Sucker.]
"What was that?"
Sounds like the spamfic where Kuno gains possession of Stormbringer.
(Hey, didn't I write that one? ^_^)
I remember that. T'was cute.
"I guess that does sound silly," Kunou admitted. "Very well. I shall put
you on and together we shall conquer the accursed Saotome and free Akane
Tendou and the pig-tailed girl from his evil clutches."
(after donning the armor) "My hair!" Kuno exclaimed. "It's white! And my
eyes! Zounds! I have become a rabid albino Samurai!"
Heh.
[Care for a quick jaunt down to the sewers?]
"Oh what the heck."
[Perhaps we'll kill some teenage mutant ninja turtles.]
<snip>
Light reflected off the tunnels as Ukyou held her flashlight before her,
twin beams coming from behind her joining the third as the trio made
their
way through the ancient sewer system. It was nice of Kodachi to give her
and Akane two other flashlights, though who knew how the gymnast managed
to
somehow keep them in that tight leotard of hers.
Nopenopenope... Not gonna go there...
Relax. It's the same place she keeps her gymnastic's clubs.
One wonders when the booby-trapped flashlights will go off...
Heh. That would be amusing.
Akane moved closer to one of the intact crates. There seemed to be some
sort of inscription on the boxes. She avoided the spilled substance and
rubbed off the slime that had accumulated on the surface of the crate,
reading the letters underneath.
"C.H.U.D."
*choke*
Now here's something I just didn't need to visualize... I guess I should
have known better once the girls went into the sewers. Thanks for that
blast from the past, D.B.
You're welcome. Still surprised at the number of people that remember that
flick.
"Why aren't we trying to enter this place through the sewers again?" Tai
asked.
Mai sighed. "Let me spell it out for you. C...H...U...D."
Ask for it by name!
Heh.
"How can you possibly say that?!" Akane shot back.
"Well, for one thing, we aren't being chased by those C.H.U.D.s anymore,
right?"
"THAT'S ONLY BECAUSE THEY WERE EATEN BY A PACK OF ALBINO ALLIGATORS!!!"
Shampoo: "Now who dummy, stupid spatula girl?"
Ukyou: Ha! You weren't right either, you dumb Amazon. They aren't rabid.
That changes everything, you know.
<snip>
"If we throw them a large piece of meat, say, a cross dressing
okonomiyaki
chef, they will be distracted, and it would give us time to escape."
You would think that Kodachi would prefer the gators to eat Akane
Tartare rather than Chipped Ukyou on Toast, seeing as how Akane
represents the strongest competition for Ranma's affection.
D.B.: Kodachi's just being practical. Ukyou's butt really is bigger.
Ukyou: (Slams author in the head with her spatula) You already used that
joke in a response, stupid!
Besides, it works better with Ukyou trying to hit Kodachi over the crack
than it would Akane, and we know Akane won't team up to get rid of her.
<snip>
Akane hoped she made it through the grating first. Then she might be
able
to shut it on her companions before they climbed out and then she
wouldn't
have to deal with their constant bickering for the rest of the night.
Akane's being awfully bloodthirsty here.
She's not seriously considering it (the scene's too silly for the threat to
be treated as a realistic consideration), though being trapped in a sewer
with Ukyou and Kodachi while being chased by C.H.U.D.s and albino
alligators is enough to try anyone's patience.
the back of his head. He kicked Ryouga in the gut and followed up by
giving
him a solid punch to the jaw, knocking him to the ground. "Just because
I
turn into a girl doesn't mean I wanna see that, you sick and disgusting
pervert!"
Ryouga laughed weakly from his sprawled out position on the floor. "I'm
bigger than you now."
<shudder> I just don't see the lost boy wishing for anything other than
a cure, myself.
Realistically I see him wishing for a sense of direction; he can cure his
curse without a wish. But that wish he made in this piece makes things a
lot more fun. A lot of his confidence problems will go away now. Though
he's now going to get other problems to substitute for its absense. :)
Ryouga suddenly realized the wide smile that nearly split her face into
two
was directed towards him. Or more specifically, what was between his
legs.
Giving an, "Ack!" Ryouga quickly zipped up.
"AAARRRGGGHHH!"
Ryouga zipped more slowly this time, a full blush covering his
pain-filled
face.
Be careful what you wish for...
Aye.
<snip>
Akane leaped out of the way of the next sword stroke. "I think I'm going
to
run instead." She took off. It was time to find Ranma and get him to
help
her. He was good at that sort of thing. She could be taken seriously as
a
martial artist next time.
That's the spirit!
Akane's survival instincts overriding her pride. Something Ranma could
learn.
<snip>
Like B.J. before her, Tai took off her disguise.
Woo-hoo! *drool*
Yes, she threw the name tag to the ground. Now be quiet.
Awww...
Sorry.
That's all folks.
Thanks a lot. All the comments were useful and greatly appreciated. Glad
you've liked it so far.
D.B. Sommer