Impact: a Piece of Neon Genesis Evangelion Fanfiction
    By Jonathan Wang

Prologue: Aftermath



The reflection was as blankly expressed as Shinji Ikari himself was as he stared into the mirror.  Its eyes were pallid and empty, as if any flowing life within them had dried out.  Glancing lower into the reflexive window, Shinji noticed its mouth was but a single line, the lips devoid of color.  Quickly, he smacked his own lips in an effort wrench out the dry desert that was his throat.  Throwing a broad look over at his expression overall, he tried his best to smile, but only to have it come out looking like an obligatory smile, since indeed that is what it was.
    Today should be a good day.  And the world, Shinji reminded himself, was not a bad place.  The world was his world, and vice versa.  Over and over the troubled young man ran this thought through his mind. Then, with the thought firmly embedded in his mind Shinji put more effort into the task at hand - trying to fit into the formal suit Misato had bought him, the one he would where to the press meeting in less than two hours.
    I am no more or less than myself, Shinji thought to himself.  It's worth living here.  His smile, though no more intense than before, was now free, and he received the same rush of joy in his body that he had felt before.  I have a future.
     Moments later, he stepped out of Misato's bedroom and headed directly for the bathroom.  It wasn't often that Shinji Ikari cried out of joy, but tears were tears, and he certainly could not present himself to the important people he would meet with a stained face.



A short distance away was Asuka Soryu Langley, who had already finished putting on her formal attire for the evening.  Also staring at her own mirror, she sat on the chair by her desk, her chin resting in the palm of her hands, her elbows on her knees, her being in an overall state of musing. Unlike Misato's room, which would be lit so that Shinji, who had probably never worn anything other than a school uniform before, would have an easier time dressing up, Asuka's room was infested with shadows.  She had left it this way as she had gotten ready for the upcoming assembly.
    With a calm grace, the child dropped her eyes to the floor, and focused her thinking upon the wired ring that had been carelessly dropped on the floor.  It was her headset, and under the shadow of the desk, it had lost the bright red color that had once been a constant boast of its bearer's pride.
    Asuka shut her eyes, and in the process let loose a few hanging tears.  Taking a deep breath, she stood up firmly, and stepped out the door towards the restroom.  Left behind were the cracked remains of what had once been of the most valuable symbol she had ever owned.



In the middle the two Children met.  Shinji had stepped out of the washroom, and Asuka could notice that half his face was stained with a red tint which contrasted the pale whiteness of the other half.  The Third Child immediately turned away before bringing his eyes around to meet the Second's.  It was another second before the two went their separate ways.



Misato Katsuragi, on the other hand, had not only finished preparing herself for the upcoming meeting, but was also waiting at the dining table, where she watched the interaction of her charges take place.
    "Shinji-kun," she called to the oncoming boy.  He responded by altering his course slightly from aiming towards the couch to heading for the table.
    "I just want to say two things," Misato began, smiling in what was most likely the most motherly smile she had ever given.  Shinji looked up with eyes that responded accordingly.  "Although we've been over this whole mess with the ... Project, I just want to say again that I'm very proud of you, that I've never been more proud of you than I am tonight as you sit here with me.  Do you understand?"
    Obedient silence.  And then "A-arigato, Misato-san."  Shinji found himself afraid that he would begin to cry again somehow.  Misato's smile grew slightly wider, and she reached over, holding the boy's cheeks in her hands.
"I've gotten the joy of watching you grow into a man, Shinji-kun."
Dead silence reigned.
    Finally, "Oh, and second: if a babe comes up to you tonight with a smile, you'd better smile back, or I'll see to it that you regret it."  Shinji blinked.  "You look that good," Misato added with a grin.
    Slightly flustered, Shinji began to smile (albeit sheepishly) as well.

...

They sit on the plane (if you can call a floating fortress a mere plane) in calm and light spirits.  That is, at least, how things seem.
Asuka Langley sits at a window seat, her chin resting on a hand while her eyes stare blankly (or dreamily?) out the window.  She is certainly ready to head back where she came from - a place where only she herself brought out her troubles in life.  In other words, Asuka Langley promised, it would be the perfect place to start over.
    Behind the Second Child rests Misato, and next to her rests a half-empty cup of alcohol, and next to that rest two bottles of wine.  The major is completely depressed now, and she inwardly feared that whenever she saw anything that would remind her of the man named Kaji (this place being one of those things), she would do this to herself.
    "Shit," she whispered, "damn you."  And with that, Misato Katsuragi fell deeper into her stupor into an uneasy slumber.



Shinji stood in the onboard restroom.  His arms forcing his weight up against the sink, he stared into the mirror.  For some reason, funny thoughts had been entering his head for the duration of this entire flight thus far.  One of these thoughts was of the First Child, dressed more elegantly than himself (Shinji's "formal" attire could be defined as anything remotely more stylish than his routine school uniform), and somehow displaying more life within by appearance alone than he himself might muster through any action.  Another funny thought would be how he would apologize to her for his previous aloof behavior while she stood there without expression, his words empty and meaningless to her understanding.
    The only comforting thought in the midst of this haze of worry and doubt was the hope that Rei would have come out of ... "complementation" more balanced as everyone else had.  This last thought, presenting itself more humorous than the rest, finally set Shinji in a fit of gusts of laughter.
    A moment later Shinji Ikari exited the bathroom and took his seat, but realized his wandering had solved nothing.  Secretly, Shinji was flushed with relief when Misato had told him that Ayanami Rei had already landed in America with the commander.
    At least the clouds below were beautiful as they shone a blue and violet tinge upon the white body.  Before closing his eyes and becoming drowsy, Shinji whispered under his breath, "Just like me."
    It was early afternoon when from the great aircraft three VTOL craft detached themselves and descended towards a great fleet of naval craft.

...

A luxury cruise ship.  Not one member of the dropping party had ever been on one before.
    Shinji spent the four hours of free time he had wandering throughout the ship, simply for lack of anything better to do.  Finally, after nearly an hour and a half of straddling aimlessly, he had stopped his desultory wandering and now stood firmly.
    Realizing that he was in the dining room of the Margo, Shinji decided to take a window seat and sat down.  Watching the scintillating blue waves outside sift by, Shinji realized the ship's droning rhythm of bobbing up and down.  This, coupled with the fact that Shinji had slept the least of the Katsuragi household, led Shinji deeper and deeper into a peaceful slumber.  That is, it would have been a peaceful slumber, if not for a single, soft, clam, but ultimately cutting sound.
    "Ikari-kun."



"Commander."
    The nondescript room, Major Katsuragi saw, contained the most important people this world had probably ever known in it.  It was a simple small cabin, but somehow standing comfortably were the commander of NERV, the sub-commander of NERV, the head scientist of NERV ... as for everyone else, Misato did not recognize, but the four of them had to be important, she knew.
    Commander Gendo Ikari turned from the cabin window, put his hands behind his back, and fittingly, the major saw, the light from outside the window hid her superior's eyes neatly.  Wearing a simple expression of calm and seriousness, he waited.
    "Reporting as ordered, sir," Misato finished, standing a bit taller than before.  Ritsuko Akagi, the aforementioned scientist, noted the slight shift in the major's stance with the raising of her eyebrows.
    "Major Katsuragi," Gendo began, "here are the leaders of both America and Germany and their wives.  They would like to personally thank you for your excellent performance."  That said, the dark man stepped aside, though it almost seemed as if he had not moved at all.
    "Major," the American one began, "You know by now that the organization NERV will be disbanded."  The received reply was a blink by the beautiful woman before him.  "What I am here to do, then, aside from giving you praise and gratitude, is to offer you a position in the American forces."
    The tone with which the tall and aging man spoke was one of respect, fatherly appeal, and most importantly, fluent English.  Misato blinked a few more times before she began to grin in embarrassment.  "Ah..."
    "The president of the United States would like to thank you for your performance and offer you a position in the American army," Ritsuko translated.  Misato visibly calmed down and thought to herself.
    It may have been a step up from the career-wise perspective, but now Misato realized that accepting this offer would mean too many things.
Misato spoke in a soft and almost sorrowful voice.  There was no mistaking the seriousness in her speech, however.  "Please tell him that ... that ... I have two children to take care of, that I can't speak English very well, that ... and that I must decline."
    Strangely, enough, Ritsuko did nothing other than chuckle with her mouth in her hand.
    "Katsuragi-ichi," The president said in stumbling Japanese, "It only took me a little over a year to learn your language, and I find it a beautiful one.  Now, if someone twenty-five years older than you yourself can learn a language, then I'm sure you can learn mine.  I think you will also find my language a beautiful one, too."
    Misato listened and watched as this balding man struggled to get his ideas across as both he and his wife smiled.  She found that she was either beginning to like and admire this man or become annoyed and get the feeling that he was mocking her.  Still, Misato had to smile at his effort.
    "Sir," Misato finally stated," I will think about your offer."
Bowing slightly and stepping aside, Misato spoke to the German leader.  The conversation was a familiar one, since the two of them were familiar people.
When Misato exited the cabin a few hours later, she was accompanied by the rest of the cabin's occupants.
    Now if only the leader of the organization that she currently worked for was this amicable.



    "Ayanami ... Rei..." Shinji managed to stumble out to himself.
The thoughts were returning to him.  This was Ayanami Rei, who was not a real person, who he did not know as he had the clone - a mere clone - before the one standing in front of him now.  He hated her because she was not the same person who had saved his life, whose life he had saved.  She was living proof that any relative feeling he had to the identity - no, entity - Ayanami Rei was false and void of reason.  She was ... not human, and she - it - was wrong.
    She was, Shinji finally noted in surprise, wearing her school clothes, plain, and somehow fitting.  In the midst of this curious state, bolted away from his previous thoughts of anger towards the being before him, he remembered what he had established before after many an hour of thought.  He needed to apologize to her.

...

"I think," Ayanami Rei stated flatly, "I am the third."
    Somewhere in that statement, Shinji Ikari realized that this was not Rei, the pale girl who had begun to note him and other people with acknowledgement of their existence and actions.
    Ayanami Rei was dead, he had decided an evening later, and when he and Misato left Ritsuko at her apartment that night, he believed that whatever the Ayanami was that he saw before was a mockery, and that somehow, it mocked him personally.

...

Quickly shutting his eyes tightly, he gathered his thoughts.  No, he could not say what he had to with his eyes turned away.  He had to face the Rei that stood before him now and firmly take a stand, any stand.
    "I am sorry," Rei III said.

...

She had wandered about the ship as Shinji had, and after covering nearly every room on the large craft, Asuka found herself in the library of the Margo.  It was the perfect place for thinking, and what more, it contained books written in English.  Even better was the fact that the entire library had only four occupants other than herself in it.
    There were two surprises for Asuka dealing with a language which she had not spoken in two years.  First of all, her vocabulary had shrunk dramatically, and second, Asuka found that she could not even read the words aloud semi-fluently.  She would have to practice at that.
    Despite all this, however, the ex-American citizen found herself finished with the short story "The Other Side of the Hedge," written by an E.M. Forster.  Asuka could not congratulate herself too much, however, for the story was but five pages long.
    Still, those five pages were filled with more meaning than anything she had read during her stay in Japan.  Either the clerk was psychic, or Asuka's pride was physically noticeable.  This story applied to her very well.
    "So how did you like it?" asked the clerk.  He was middle-aged man, slightly tall and less wrinkled, wearing small round glasses, and smelling an awful lot like smoke.  There was no doubt in Asuka mind now, however, that this man was intelligent, and most likely a philosopher.  He had been at his own book while Asuka read hers, and she felt somewhat defeated when she noticed that he had read some thirty pages of his story to her five.  Yet, it felt like an honorable defeat somehow.
    "It was," Asuka spoke in a rugged English, "very nice."  Embarrassment washed over her when the clerk grinned at her Asian-tinged accent.
    "Ah, good.  Found it ... enriching, did you?"
    Asuka felt like her mind was openly displaying her thoughts.  "How long have you been a library clerk?" she asked, furrowing her brow.
    That was when two of the other library occupants stood up from a light and slow conversation they were having, strode over, and one of them asked in a soft, serious, and threatening voice: "Are you the Second Child?"



Author's note: This fanfic was heavily inspired by Tom Clancy's Rainbow Six. The book has an interweaving story that I can only hope to dream up one day.  For now, I will stick with what I have and try my best to do Tom Clancy justice.  Wish me luck.

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