From: "Chris Davies" <cricharddavies@hotmail.com>
To: <aerolbj@i-next.net>; <ffml@fanfic.com>
<snip>
Forgive any formating errors, problems with the puter I'm afraid.
A disscussion on pain... and I wasn't invited, <sniffle> Heh, I was hoping
my first post to the list in QUITE some time would be more ficcish... ah
well...
Just like to say that I enjoyed the essay, my own thoughts on the practice
and it's use being probably better shown through a certain fic of mine.
Another useful purpose for pain to flesh out characters is
to give the character a defining event in their lives, but not
physically this time. More psychologically/emotionally this
time. For example, a serial killer on trial using an insanity
plea has a psychologist psychoanalyze him. The psychologist
present to the court an incident in the defendant's life, where
he finds his little sister dead and sexually assaulted. From the
beginning we are presented with the idea that this man does
killing for fun, now we are presented with a picture that the
man is cannot help himself from doing these things because of
the trauma he has received. We are presented with a more solid
character, attracting both disgust and hate along with pity and
sadness.
The problem is, it doesn't always work, largely because it's a device
that's been overused -- and because it's just not right.
I wouldn't say it doesn't work. I'd say, without back meat, without a more
full picture, seen just as a device... or worse... an excuse, it loses it's
own credence, becoming... just another plot device.
*Every*one has pain. That's a reality. We can speculate on the reasons for
it, debate the necessity, but at the end of the day, that is *the*
reality.
And we all choose how we deal with it.
One of the things that annoys me more then anything else when talking with
someone about themselves is when they recant some horrid little episode of
life and then look at me, almost smiling.
"See? See what I've lived through? How could you ever understand me? How
could you possibly compete?"
The one thing that humanity as a whole can point to as the most basic and
ingraine of common ground... pain... and we can't even connect with one
another. Ghost stories of the past becoming a competetion, a way to judge,
grade and segregate ourselves... as opposed to the common ground on which we
all end up standing.
Unfortunately, some people who've been victims, choose to become
victimizers.
It's a logical progression, in a lot of ways, but it's *not* automatic.
And
frankly, I'm becoming a bit disturbed at the tendency -- in the real world
and in fiction -- to assume that anyone who's had a difficult or
dysfunctional childhood will automatically grow up to be some sort of
monster. The cycle of abuse *can* be broken.
My parents managed it.
There are other, more chemical things to consider... my father was not an
abusive man... not physically anyway <goddess knows he could make you repent
a messy room as though Jesus lay dead at your feet>. This was the very same
man that was beaten with fist, bull whip and a frying pan... till he
literally fell out of consiciousness. All of this by four seperate sets of
parentals, none of whom had any buisness with a rod and a pole, let alone a
rod and a child.
This did not become him, and ergo, I did not follow suit.
However, the same happy funzie cocktail of misplaced euphoria and out of
placed adrenal glands that gave him the Adam's family that was his first and
most abusive set of four-by four beating fathers... worked their way into
me. I suffer from deppression, mania, and of course, the odd and ever so fun
at parties... rage disorder.
Anger seethes, uncontrolably for the most minor of instances at times, with
nothing to foreshadow the sudden influx.
Endorphines drop, face gets flushed, and I expierence a sort of minature
seisure... twitching slightly and too angry to breathe. Luckily, I found
other ways to deal that has kept me from harming others... <myself, an
entirely different matter, as friends and readers of SB might attest>
Then there is the idea of that one defining moment in the first place.
Thing is, you go back into the past to find that one, "really bad day"... as
Alan Moore put it in the Killing Joke... you have this amazing tendency to
find several. There was that moment that daddy beat you, that moment that
mommy decieded she didn't love you, that kid you brained upside a glass
door, and those warm fuzzy feelings grandfather gave you as you sat upon his
knee... while he placed his fingers here and there.
Personal tradgedies tend to give authors alot to work with. It's a natural
peak, or gully... one that can either be climbed out of, or fallen off of.
But for every turning point in a life... there are a good thousand more that
were avoided, ignored, or the well traveled path was taken out of
indifference if nothing else.
You're readers, if they're watchful, won't accept a quick fix. It's never as
simple as all that, no matter how we might wish it would be. After all, if
Ryouga's current kamikaze run toward friends and family could all simply be
traced to just an abusive father, then with confronation... wouldn't he be
hokay?
And that's the other thing to consider... labeling your problems, while good
for filing, does little to cure them. We still don't have anything more then
the most minor inkling into our own internal workings, and we have yet to
find that section of the brain where, when pushed, flushes bad memories with
a sudden influx of blue cleaner and cranial freshener.
Scars on the brain, on the soul, are just that, scars. They don't go away,
they don't just heal... most times you have to look at them, get used to
their presence and hope that the world will think they give you a debonair
little flair.
What does all this mean for Ficing? Your characters are the sum total of
everything that they have expierenced, the DNA gop that they were sprung
from, and the random introduction of cosmic forces beyound our
understanding. Without every scar, they hardly are... humans tending to be
more patchwork then quilt.
Quick fixes, quick explanations, all lead to quick characters...
Ahem, just remember though, every human, every person, every character, is
in fact a bottomless pit, almost impossible to fathom... don't lose your
readers plunging the depths.
How do you tell the difference, from not enough splinters to pick your
teeth, to so many tree's that the forest itself is obscured?
Practice... lot's of practice, observation, and as much honesty with
yourself, as you can handle.
Every good author knows that hurting a character
takes guts and courage, since we're technically doing it to a
piece of ourselves. But, again, as any good author knows, the
story is foremost, the tale supreme above all concerns. Thus
writers follow the Machiavellian principle of the end justifying
the means. I massacre a family here. I blow up a country there.
I abuse someone over there. All for the sake of the story and
plot, to give the reader and the story the ending they deserve.
BUT.
The most magical moment in writing anything comes when a character stands
up and says "No. I'm not going to do what you want. It doesn't suit my own
ideas for what I ought to do in this situation."
Though, remember to take into account that someone's own ideas might just be
horrendous, twisted and all together not nice. There is no "default"
niceness inherent in being the human. Quite the opposite actually.
As far as magical moments, I think finding those on a personal level is
something all writers have to find for themselves. I've had magical moments
with characters spewing an inceasant line of innanity in the face of
adversity. And I've gotten goose bumps when characters have lashed out at
one another with cycnical, acidic... truth.
Your "kicks" are where you find them.
And half the fun of this gig ^_-
<snip>