Strangers in a Strange Land
Chapter 5
]] Thank you! First "Cats Have No Tears" was (sort of) concluded,
]] now this...
]]
]] I was actually thinking of writing about some thoughts
]] I had on the Nabiki situation, but you released two new chapters
]] before I could type something up. Anyway...
]]
]] Also, I must preface my comments by admitting that I only know
}} SM J from what I could find on websites (a search motivated by
]] your story, of course. :)
<...>
]] And now... a few scenes from last month's show...
Ranma froze, panicking at first. <When did we...? We didn't...?>
Ranma started breathing again as the previous days events came back too
her. <Oh yeah,> Ranma remembered dourly. <We're on another planet,
five hundred years in the future, and we're on the run because we're not
human anymore, but robots of some sort... Marionettes. Oh, not to
mention Nabiki being missing, and Akane nearly destroying a
Marionette... and needing to get her arm repaired and....>
<...>
Akane shook her head, moving her broken arm's shoulder
experimentally. "No, it hasn't changed. I still can't feel it, or move
it. Actually, I kind of wish it did hurt... at least then I'd know it
was real...."
]] Now there's a fine kettle of fish... What is 'real' it is certainly
]] not 'real' in the human sense, but it is an arm...
She shook her head. "It's hard to remember sometimes...
that we're robots, I mean. I feel so... normal." Akane glanced at her
broken arm. "Most of the time."
Ranma winced again. "I understand. Don't worry, Akane, we'll get
your arm fixed up, I promise."
]] I hate to ask 'how do you propose to do that, BUT... HOW do you
]] propose to do THAT?
Akane smiled slightly. "Don't go making promises you can't keep,
Ranma. That's how you get into so much trouble."
]] Ah, Akane agrees!
Ranma frowned. "Hey! I don't go around promising nothing I won't
keep to.... Pop is responsible for making all those stupid promises,
not me!"
]] BUT what did you just do... (Good bit of characterization).
Akane looked thoughtful. "Really? Engaging you two
]] to (or does two refer to the two forms Ranma used to have? :^)
four different
women wasn't your idea? I thought that would be any guy's fantasy."
]] Well... uh... in a society where plural marriages were
]] accepted... maybe. But then, it does sound like something
]] Akane might say...
<...>
Ranma looked thoughtful. "Well, we know where those Marionettes
that had her hand came from, so we've got a place to check first, but
before we go back to the palace, we gotta get your arm looked at.
There's gotta be a doctor... or a Marionette repairman or something we
can find."
]] Yeah, you have to change your terminology, repairman instead of
]] doctor, for instance.
Akane nodded, looking hopeful. "So we go back into town?"
Ranma hesitated. "No....I'm going alone. Akane, no offense but
you're not at your best right now. If we got into trouble I'd just have
to look out for you. I'll go myself and find out where you need to go."
Akane's eyes lit up in anger for a moment, and Ranma could see her
]] then or and then instead of just and? One would assume she looked
]] angry before she visibly calmed down.
visibly calming herself down. "Ranma.... OK, you're right, I admit
it." Her shoulders slumped. "I'm worthless to you like this."
<...>
Akane glanced around the small clearing. "I'll be here, waiting.
Don't get yourself hurt, Ranma. No heroics this time, OK?"
]] Well, considering that thee are probably several people looking for
]] them, no heroics might not be an option.
<...>
Akane stood still for several long seconds until Ranma was well out
of sight, then her face lit up with renewed rage. "Why that... idiot!
How can he... she say something like that and just run off!" She
glowered. "Just you wait until you get back here Ranma... just you
wait." Akane's anger dissolved almost as fast as it had appeared.
"Just as long as you get back, Ranma. Please, come back safe."
]] Again, I thought that scene was very well done.
****************************
<...>
"I'm not really sure what I'm looking for." Ranma groused after
several hours of fruitless search. "I mean, I'm not looking for a
doctor's office... what do you call a marionette repair man anyway?"
]] Well, don't call him or her stupid... if you want to get fixed.
<...>
Hours passed before Ranma found her opportunity to enter the palace
unobserved. A particular
]] A particular or peculiar? And, in either case, why is it so?
looking car pulled up to the front gates and
Ranma jumped down and stealthily followed it inside when the gates were
opened to let it drive in. She was careful not to get too close and
broke away from the vehicle as it neared the front of the main building
inside the compound.
<...>
Now THAT'S high security!
<...>
]] A bit of well described stealth and...
Lorelei's eyes went wide and she started to speak. "Who...?"
Ranma moved like lightning, dropping the grate with a clatter, she
rushed over and covered Lorelei's mouth with her hand. "Shhh. Be
quiet, or else." Ranma's mind asked sarcastically, <Or else what? Its
not like you're going to hurt her.> Ranma shot back instantly to that.
<Oh yeah? At least she doesn't know that.> Lorelei froze, intimidated
by the red head's speed, and Ranma slowly lowered her hand. "OK,
quietly, tell me if there are any guards nearby."
Lorelei hesitated, then shook her head. "No.... I'm alone. What
do you want with me?"
Ranma looked the strawberry blond haired scientist in the eyes.
"You're Lorelei, right?"
]] No, but I am going to call the guards! (just joking)
Lorelei nodded, calming down. "Yes. You've been trying to get to
me for two days now, haven't you? Why?" There was something about this
marionette that made her curious instead of frightened, Lorelei
remembered the recording of Otaru and his marionette's fight against the
petite red head in front of her. She hadn't done any damage in the
]] I have redhead being one word... a minor point, really.
fight, despite her obviously greater skill. Something told Lorelei that
she wasn't in any immediate danger.
Ranma nodded. "We were, until you sent your guards out to catch
us." She looked angry all of a sudden. "What have you done with
Nabiki?"
Lorelei blinked. "Nabiki? Who is that?"
Ranma's eyes narrowed dangerously. "She was with me and Akane
before... your guards must have told you. She's got short brown hair,
and was wearing a green kimono."
Lorelei thought furiously. "So Akane is the marionette with short
black hair?" Lorelei's eyes widened. "Nabiki... a green kimono...
Cherry found...."
Ranma took a threatening step toward Lorelei, genuinely angry now.
"Where is she!" She hissed the last word loudly, remembering to keep
her voice down at the last second.
]] Always jumping to conclusions. (Like she's supposed to)
Lorelei shook her head quickly, looking frightened. "Cherry only
found a hand... I swear I don't know where... Nabiki is."
Ranma looked into the woman's eyes and saw no deception there, only
fear. "I see." She sighed heavily, her face becoming bleak.
Lorelei's fear started to fade again as the small marionette in
front of her visibly went from anger to worry. Such a range of
emotion. This marionette's maiden circuit is incredibly advanced!
]] Okay, here is a good place to advance the argument I mentioned
]] earlier (in the e-mail about Nabiki I never sent).
]] Could it be that these three marionettes actually have the SOULS
]] of Ranma, Nabiki, and Akane? In the film "Tron", the human
]] character, though reduced to data like all the other inhabitants
]] of the computer world, had amazing powers BEACAUSE he was
]] human... Might there be something like that in action here?
]]
]] Don't worry, I'm not fishing for spoilers... Really. But if
]] it is something you haven't considered, please do.
]]
]] The way this relates to Nabiki is that I was going to suggest
]] that possibly her soul might allow her to, in time, break Kunou's
]] reprogramming...
She's worried about her friend.... Lorelei blinked at her own
thoughts. Friend, yes. She's worried about this Nabiki very much.
She's acting in a completely human manner.
]] I wonder why?
<...>
Lorelei blinked, then took a long, thoughtful look at the petite red
head in front of her. The marionette was about as far from threatening
in appearance as a person could get. Wearing an oversized man's shirt,
she appeared to be just out of puberty, wafishly attractive, and
anything but dangerous. Appearances were meaningless, of course, when
dealing with marionettes, but there was something there that made
Lorelei believe her.
]] Good choice, but appearance can be deceiving...
<...>
Ranma shook her head, confused. "Why do I...? It's my name, OK?
Ranma Saotome, just like my mom and dad. I guess I'm the last
Saotome... unless mom and dad had another kid after I...." Ranma looked
confused. "Wait, I didn't die... well I did... but Kuno's machine
didn't kill me... just copied my memories... so maybe Akane and I had
kids."
]] No alarm bells over the 'kids' comment?
<...>
Lorelei interrupted, looking shocked. "Iago? Iago Ikari,
]] Of the Tokyo 3 Ikaris? :^)
<...>
Godai Kuno's voice came from outside the kitchen, surprising both of
them. "I'm afraid I can't let you do that, Miss Lorelei." Ranma and
Lorelei spun to face him, but before Ranma could do anything else, she
was racked by a horrible jolt, and went down, limbs flailing out of
control.
]] Ranma: Godai Kunou! I thought that I smelled your foul stench in
]] the hallway.
]] Kunou: Ah, my fair Ranma... charming to the last.
<...>
The brown haired marionette stepped forward obediently. "Yes
master."
]] Shudder. First Nabiki, then Ranma?
************************************
]] A flashback, it would seem.
Nabiki woke up, finding herself feeling an intense deja vu. She was
in the same place she had woken up the day before.
]] Is 'the day' before needed? Does Nabiki really have a sense of
]] time like that? Or is it some intrinsic time-sense in the
]] marionette circuitry?
The only difference
was that this time she couldn't bring herself to move.
"Nabiki, get off the table and stand up please." Nabiki found
herself doing so before she could think. In a moment she found herself
standing in front of the speaker, Godai Kuno. Belatedly, Nabiki
realized that she was naked, but again found herself unable to act as
she wished. Instead of covering herself up, she just continued to
stand. Nabiki couldn't seem to even blush or close her eyes. Her gaze
rested firmly on Godai's face.
Godai walked around her once, inspecting her while Nabiki struggled
inside her head. As far as she could tell, she had lost all control
over her body's actions.
]] Scary, but at least it's still NABIKI inside. At first I thought
]] this was poetic justice, Nabiki as Kunou's great great ... great
]] grandson's puppet, but her fate is far more terrible than that.
When the older man finished his inspection he
turned to face her, then nodded to a pile of clothing on a nearby
table. "Get dressed."
Nabiki rushed to obey, and found motion restored to her. The
sensation was an incredible relief, and Nabiki got dressed quickly...
then found herself standing paralyzed again. "Come over here." Godai
commanded, and Nabiki turned t face him, then tried to stop, refuse his
]] to face him,
command, but to no avail. Her body kept moving, except now she was no
longer in control of it. Nabiki found herself moving entirely against
her will, and she was powerless to do anything about it.
Godai waited for her to reach him and looked into her eyes
enquiringly. "So, how do you like your new program, Nabiki?" Nabiki
frowned, not speaking, and Godai smiled. "I see that you've discovered
the fact that you no longer have control of your body... unless you are
following my instructions." He shrugged. "The command protocols I
inserted are quite sophisticated, but they cannot express an opinion...
which you can."
]] Does he really want to hear it?
]]
]] Nabiki: Hey, he's Kunou! Of course he wants to hear it, but
]] it might not be what he expects!
Nabiki spoke. "My opinion isn't fit for human ears... but for you
I'll make an exception...."
]] Shouldn't there be a paragraph break here?
"Shh." Godai put his finger to his lips. "It wouldn't do to hear such
words from such an exquisite creation as you, my dear. Keep your words
polite, or do not speak."
Nabiki glared at him, finding that his command did keep her from
expressing anything "not polite" through her words, but didn't restrict
her expression. "Turn it off." Nabiki said finally. "I'll do what you
want, just turn it off."
]] Yeah right!
]]
]] Nabiki: Hey! A girl's gotta try!
Godai shook his head. "I think not. I do not wish a repeat of your
earlier actions. You are my property, and you will remain my
property." He turned towards the stairs. "Come with me, I have a few
tests to perform."
]] This opens up a whole moral can of worms. Of course it can be argued
]] that both the mental recordings and bodies ARE his possession. But,
]] since the three have shown indications of emotions and thought
]] patterns beyond other marionettes, it can also be argued they are,
]] essentially, human slaves. Scary situation. It will be interesting
]] to see how this plays out.
Nabiki found herself following along after him as Kuno left the lab
and went up the long flight of stairs. Almost immediately, she
surrendered, and started walking after him on her own. The regained
control of her body was intoxicating, a vast improvement over
paralysation, or having her body controlled by someone else. Before
]] paralysis,
long, they reached the courtyard and stopped. Nabiki found that she
retained control of her body as long as she obeyed Kuno's instructions
to the letter, following him or even standing still was under her
control.
]] Wouldn't a verbal cue be required, however?
There was a vast difference even, in standing motionless
purposefully, than being simply unable to move. Nabiki had never
thought of herself as a hedonist, but the lack of sensation when she was
not in control of herself was rapidly becoming unbearable.
]] Interesting... Not really total sensory deprivation, more like
]] tactile deprivation. Still, something she would want to avoid.
There was a pair of Cherry Blossom marionettes in the courtyard, and
Godai Kuno pointed to them. "I want you to fight these marionettes,
now."
Nabiki hesitated, then found herself moving forward towards the
marionettes against her will. The Cherry Blossoms readied their weapons
as she moved close, and Nabiki fought down a wave of panic. Don't
freeze up now girl! Kuno's already proven that the automatic pilot or
whatever that is controlling me isn't as good at using this body as I
am... so I've got to take over, or get skewered!
Nabiki thought about blocking one of the marionettes spear thrusts,
and found herself in control of her body once again. Rapidly however
she found herself on the defensive. Oh no! It's been too long since I
practiced. I haven't done any real martial arts since I was a kid....
]] If (and I hope it's the case) Nabiki gets out of here somehow, I
]] hope she'll practice a little more.
Nabiki didn't have anymore time for thought as she retreated quickly,
barely avoiding being struck by the Cherry Blossom's weapons. This body
is plenty fast and strong... but I just don't have the moves....
Godai's voice rang out. "Nabiki, begin combat protocols level
one!" Suddenly Nabiki found herself fighting back again, only her body
was once again out of her control.
]] once more (to avoid two agains in the same sentence)
She watched in horrified fascination
as she spun through the Cherry Blossoms defenses like they weren't
moving, and knocked them both off their feet. Grabbing a spear away,
and snapping the second one's weapon with a snap kick, Nabiki's body was
about to finish the fight when Godai shouted again. "Halt!"
Both she and the two Cherry Blossoms stopped moving at his command.
]] Hmmm... nit time. If they were all moving, Newton decrees that they
]] should keep moving, which would probably result in all three
]] falling down, as their immobile bodies would not be able to
]] compensate.
]]
]] Of course, the scenario might be instead that 'Halt' means stop ASAP,
]] which requires a certain combination of actions to first stop
]] the motion, assume a stable position, then freeze in place.
The older man nodded in satisfaction. "Excellent, the program works
perfectly. Nabiki, come to me."
Nabiki obeyed immediately, not wanting to lose control of her body
again. She spoke accusingly. "I know that style, those moves... Those
were Ranma's moves, I was using the Anything Goes style of Martial
Arts."
Godai nodded, looking extremely smug. "The program is of my own
invention. Thanks to Professor Iago's data, and my technology and
know-how, I have produced to most powerful combat program yet
]] the most
developed. As a grandmaster of the Anything Goes style, I chose Ranma
Saotome to emulate for the program." His eyes gleamed. "As of now,
only a Saber Marionette such as yourself had the capacity to handle such
a sophisticated program... but as we speak, Yusaku is upgrading the
capacity on several of our Cherry Blossoms. Before long, my marionettes
will be the most powerful in the world."
]] Nabiki: All he needs now is the Bwa ha ha ha!
Nabiki tried to keep from laughing. "Aren't you being a bit...
megalomaniacal?"
]] Nabiki: See, I told ya!
Godai frowned. "I'm getting tired of your attitude. From now on,
keep your opinions too yourself unless I ask you for them... and address
me properly. I am your master, and you will address me as such."
"Yes Master." Nabiki found herself answering immediately.
]] I am uncertain, is a comma required after the Yes ?
Godai nodded. "Very good. Now, we do not have much time to waste.
Come with me." Once again Godai started off, and Nabiki hurried to
follow, seething with anger and trying not to let the hopelessness of
her situation overwhelm her.
]] the instead of the first her, perhaps?
]] 'Of the situation overwhelm her.'
Before long she found herself with Godai
in an odd vehicle apparently called a 'Motor Palanquin' and headed for
the Japoness Imperial palace. Two of the Cherry Blossoms accompanied
them. The vehicle drove there automatically, and on their arrival the
gates were opened with no questions, and then the main palace entrance
as well.
]] So THAT'S the odd vechicle!
<...> Nice description deleted.
"Now, all I have to do is identify Lorelei's position. The men of
Japoness have been ordered about by a woman for the last time." Godai
nodded at a point on the screen. "That's her. It's the only human on
that level of the palace, which is near her private chambers." He
frowned. "From this I can read one marionette in the area with her...
and its not one of the palace sentries, all of those are accounted
for...." He spun away, heading for the door. "Come, we must hurry."
]] I wonder if he suspects who it is?
Nabiki and the Cherry Blossom Marionettes followed immediately after
him, winding their way through the palace quickly, taking a circuitous
route to avoid sentries.
Godai gloated slightly as they hurried along. "I've taken over most
of the palace security with a specially tailored computer virus I
designed myself. Once Lorelei is dealt with, power will be restored to
its rightful place, in the hands of intelligent men."
]] Since the POV changes, should there be a paragraph break here?
Nabiki glared at his back, raging silently. In the hands of an
egotistical chauvinist pig you mean. The control program kept her from
speaking, but her thoughts, at least, were still her own.
]] Good!
As they rounded the final corner, Nabiki could hear two women
quietly talking, and one of them was Ranma! She sighed in relief.
Ranma will save me. He... she always manages to save the day in the
end. And she's with Lorelei! Ha, Godai, what are you going to do now?
Godai heard the voices as well and frowned. He strode to the door
to the kitchen just as Lorelei voice raised in anger. "I understand. I
really do understand. I promise I'll help you. We won't let the Kunos
get you back, I promise you that."
]] Extremely effective use of a flashback. We get the shock of seeing
]] Nabiki show up and take Lorelei... THEN the shock of seeing
]] WHY she did it.
Godai interrupted, clearing his throat for emphasis. . "I'm afraid I
can't let you do that, Miss Lorelei." He brought a small device out of
his pocket and pointed it at Ranma, and the red head went down
instantly, limbs thrashing.
Nabiki felt a slight tinge even standing behind Godai and winced.
Oh no! That thing again! How can Ranma fight if I she can't even stand
up? Ranma... come on, get up... you can do this!
Lorelei looked shocked. "An EMP caster? What are you going to do
with her?"
Godai shook his head sadly. "I'm afraid it's not what I'm going to
do with her, but what I'm going to have to do with you, Miss Lorelei,
that you should be concerning yourself with." He nodded to Nabiki and
she stepped forward against her will. "Nabiki, capture Lorelei for me."
Nabiki found herself answering automatically. "Yes Master." Her
body once again out of her control, Nabiki stepped forward to do her
master's bidding.
]] An idea came to me here... might it be more correct to say "Nabiki's
]] body" instead of Nabiki (this time around, at least) since we now
]] KNOW Nabiki doesn't do it willingly.
Lorelei stepped back but Nabiki was on her in a flash, pinning her
arms behind her. That combat program is still on. Nabiki realized.
There's nothing I can do! Nabiki pressed a spot on Lorelei's neck with
precisely calculated force and after a few seconds Lorelei fainted dead
away in her arms.
Nabiki cradled the woman carefully in her arms, finding herself
temporarily back in control of her body. She suddenly noted with a
surge of hope, that Ranma had managed to get to her feet, and was headed
for Godai. <Come on, Ranma, get the box!>
Godai stepped back; keeping his device firmly pointed at Ranma.
"What's wrong with this thing? I increased its output by fifty
percent... it should be working." He waved to Nabiki. "Hurry up, get
away from there and get behind me with Lorelei."
]] Paragraph break here, perhaps?
Nabiki found herself obeying automatically for a moment before she
resisted the command. No! What am I doing? I can't help him kidnap
Lorelei. Her inner protest was unheard as her body continued to follow
Godai's instructions, carrying the woman out of the kitchen and around
behind Godai Kuno. He continued to back up as Ranma came for him.
"Damn." Godai looked extremely annoyed. "I wanted to get Ranma
back as well... drop, damn it, drop!
]] Ranma: Thank the Kami for small favors!
You should be shutting down by
now!" Running footsteps interrupted him. "Now what? Guards? No more
time." He hurried down the hall, stopping at a panel at the corner.
"Hmm, there should be a passageway... here." Godai pushed a spot on the
wall, which promptly caused a ten by six section of it to open up.
"Hurry, go through here. I can't be seen here."
]] Are there any security cameras that might show what happened,
]] perhaps?
Godai kept his EMP caster on Ranma until all three of his
marionettes were through the wall then. "I suppose I'll let you take
the blame for this. Convenient, isn't it?" He closed the passage
behind him just as Otaru and several of his marionettes rounded the
corner heading for the kitchen.
]] Of course, since Ranma's still there and Lorelei isn't...
Ranma felt full control of his body returning slowly as the group of
marionettes came into view. The one in the lead was the same marionette
that Akane had damaged the day before.
"I'm sure the signal is coming from the kitchen area." Cherry
explained as she led the way through the palace. "It's the same signal
I noticed before those two rogue marionettes attacked us, Otaru-sama."
Otaru nodded. "Well, I'm just glad you're back on your feet again,
Cherry. I don't know what we'd do without you."
Cherry smiled happily at the praise, then went back to leading the
group through the corridors. "Not much farther...." They rounded the
corner to the kitchen and spotted a familiar looking red haired
marionette wearing a man's shirt.
Panther went after her in a rush. "It's her! I'm going to tear her
head off!" Bloodberry followed right after, a violent grin on her
face. "I'm going to get you for making me look bad in front of Otaru."
She promised quietly.
Ranma's eyes went wide and she turned to run, still feeling the
effects of whatever Godai Kuno had been zapping her with.
Oh man, I'm in trouble! They want to kill me now... what about when
they find out Lorelei's gone? I've got to get out of here! Ranma's
thoughts became increasingly desperate as Panther and Bloodberry closed
the gap between them and her. I'm still woozy from whatever Kuno did...
I can't fight them all like this!
]] Bad news.
Otaru watched the trio sprint off in dismay. "Lime, go after them,
try to capture her intact." Lynx, Cherry, find out where they're going
and head them off. We need some answers!"
]] Intact is a good thing!
Lime raced off with a cherry nod. "OK!" Cherry and Lynx began
quickly scanning and Otaru started to run off.
Cherry hesitated. "What are you doing, Otaru-sama?"
Otaru glanced back, not stopping. "I'm going to check on Lorelei!
Now hurry?"
Cherry nodded, going back to her work. "They're headed for the main
gate. We can still cut them off if we hurry." She was already running
in mid word, Lynx a step behind her.
"I concur." The blue haired marionette replied softly. "But where
are the other two rogues?"
Cherry shook her head helplessly but didn't answer, the two of them
running in silence.
**********************
Please C&C. I alway appreciate your thoughts.
]] Always, perhaps?
]] Well done!
Kevin D. Hammel
========================================
khammel@anime.sobhrach.com
kevinsff@pacbell.net
http://www.anime.sobhrach.com/~khammel/
========================================