Gregg Sharp wrote:
Jared stood with his back to the camp, firelight dancing
across his shoulders from where Belldandy taught Ranko some
of the finer points of preparing a meal.
Tears inched down both his cheeks as he gazed off into the
sunset, remembering what was.
I had a simultaneous feeling of, "this seems unfinished, he's
thinking about the present, as in "what was going on around him,"
and something that happened.
I thing it would flow better if you did, "remembering what was past." or
"remembering what had once been." Something to that effect.