The Amazon and the Moneylender: Episode 2, Part 1: Two
more Favors
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"OO-hahahahahahahhahahahahahahahaha!!!!" the high
pitched laugh rang throughout the small room, bouncing
off walls and bouncing back and forth, combining and
enhancing itself. Anybody who had never experienced
the sound before would have been huddled in corner
trying hold the sound out of their ears.
"Dear sister," Kuno, still bandaged head to toe,
began from behind the slowly cracking bullet-proof
glass. "This is not a laughing matter."
"I'm sorry, brother-dear," the black-haired girl
responded, trying to get control of herself.
"Actually...no I am not.
OO-hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!"
"Kodachi, you have to get me out of here." The
would-be samurai was demanding this of her now. "I
must find the real Ukyou to prove that the creature a
defeated is merely an inhuman imposter in the service
of the foul Hibiki and his master Saotome."
"Brother-dear," Kodachi answered, seriously. "You
have stretched even my limits. You'll have to use your
own resources, oh that's right, you have no resources.
OO-hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!"
"You mean to say that you don't believe me?" Kuno
said in disbelief.
"Of course not," Kodachi stood up and turned
around. "Good-bye brother-dear."
"Don't think that I'll forget this dear sister," he
limped his way back to his cell under escort. "It
matters not, my faithful Sasuke will come for me."
"Where do you think you're going?" Sasuke jumped at
the sound of the voice, muffled enough to be totally
unidentifiable. He turned around slowly and saw a
black garbed figure sitting on the light pole above
him.
"To free master Kuno from the jail, of course,"
Sasuke answered. The black garbed figure dropped to
the ground with a grace born of years of ninja
training. "Aren't I supposed to serve thee Kuno
family?"
"The Kuno family," the figure agreed, he couldn't
even tell what gender the other ninja was. "Not
Tatewaki Kuno."
"The clan has revoked its support?"
"We don't need to be connected to him any longer.
Perhaps you shall keep a closer eye on his sister and
father?"
"What do you mean?" Sasuke gulped.
"You indicated that his....less healthy
aspects....were contained and limited to a target that
could easily handle himself. The Jonin never did
approve of the man, though your reports were
convincing enough to sustain our support."
"I couldn't have predicted the Kuonji incident."
The figure ignored him.
"Your mission is revised, from the Jonin's mouth.
Tatewaki is branded a traitor to the Kuno clan, is
that understood?"
"H-h-hai," Sasuke kowtowed and slinked back to the
Kuno mansion under cover of night.
"Isn't Ukyou out of Dr. Tofu's yet?" Ranma asked.
Akane growled.
"Why are you worried about her?" Akane asked
irritably.
"Not like that!!! Not like that!!!" Ranma declared,
waving his hands desperately. "It's just that no one's
in at Ucchan's yet." He squinted an eye open to see
whether he had to dodge a mallet or not.
"What?" Akane was surprised at that as well.
"Ryouga picked her up days ago."
"Ryouga picked her up?"
"Yes, what does that..." Akane paused. "Oh. Uh oh."
"Baka!! Go the other way!!" Ukyou shouted.
"Oh, sorry," Ryouga turned the wheelchair around.
"THE OTHER OTHER WAY!!!" Ryouga stopped.
"Which way?" Ryouga asked. Ukyou pointed irritably.
"It's a thirty minute walk between Ucchans and Dr.
Tofu's!!" Ukyou yelled. "And we've been walking for at
least a day!!!"
"Actually, it has been almost three days," Ryouga
admitted grudgingly. "You were asleep for quite
awhile."
"EERRGGHH!! I don't know where we are," Ukyou said
despondently. "I can't see over all these gaijin, are
we in the business district or something? You didn't
keep going after I fell asleep, did you."
"Uhh...."
*CLANG*
"Okay, I just need to find something
I...rec..og..nize?" Ukyou blinked as the crowd cleared
for a moment. She turned to the dazed Ryouga, "RYOUGA
NO BAKA!!!!"
"What did I do??" Ryouga pleaded. "And where'd you
get another spatula."
"Kasumi brought it over," she explained calmly,
then started yelling again. "This isn't Nerima!!"
Ukyou shouted. "This isn't even Japan!!!" She pointed
to an old building surrounded by a variety of shops
and other businesses.
"Hey, I think I've seen this in a movie somewhere,"
Ryouga said.
"IT'S THE ALAMO!!!" Ukyou shouted. "Haven't you
ever seen a John Wayne movie?!? AARRGGHHH!!! How did
we get here?"
"The last place I stopped was that lounge," Ryouga
said, thinking back.
"Lounge? What lounge?" Ukyou asked.
"It was really expensive to get into," Ryouga said.
"Long with really tightly packed rows of seats. And I
think it was on stilts or something because felt
really bumpy. I think you slept the entire time."
"Expensive? Long rows? Bumpy?" Ukyou blinked
several times. "THAT WAS AN AIRPLANE YOU IDIOT!!!"
"Oh, that would explain why all those TVs were on
the weather channel."
"ARRRGHHH!!!!!!!!"
"You sure this cover Shampoo debt?" Shampoo asked,
nervously.
"Shh!" Nabiki insisted. The middle Tendo's eyes
were locked onto the screen where Leonardo DiCaprio
and Kate Winslet were talking about the way the world
worked in badly dubbed Japanese.
"This very boring movie," Shampoo whispered
irritably. The rest of the movie went something like
this.
"It's *sniff* so *sniff* beautiful..."
"It big ice cube."
"I know.....but its a *sniff* profitable ice cube."
"Oh Shampoo....it's so *sniff* sad..."
"Girly-boy freezing, boo-hoo."
"No...I *sniff* I should have pushed for a bigger
share, WAAAAAA!!!"
"Hey!! Quiet back there!!" Somebody shouted, they
turned to see a glowing, very cross looking, Shampoo
staring at them. This caused them to decide to keep to
themselves and watch the rest of the movie.
"Honorable grandmother," Mousse began. "Where is
Shampoo? I have not seen her all day." Cologne
growled, and then thought about. Shampoo was out with
that Tendo girl, the money grubbing sneak. This was
something that Cologne was concerned about, and not
only because she suspected that Nabiki was behind
foiling some of her more subtle plans. The plans that
never managed to reach daylight, unlike the accidental
and improvised plots that she did manage to bring out
to fruition.
"She is out with that Tendo girl," she told the
blind young boy.
"What is Shampoo doing with Akane?"
*BONK*
"Fool," Cologne spat. "She is with Nabiki."
"Is this a problem?"
"Oh, just check the diner," Cologne growled.
"They'll show up there eventually."
The disaster-romance flick ended shortly before
Shampoo's already questionable mind could fry from the
inaction. Nabiki came out brushing tears away from her
face, which held its usual smug expression. Shampoo
virtually dragged herself out, fighting yawn and
bone-gnawing boredom.
"So Shampoo," Nabiki started as they came into the
light. "Why did you want to come along? You could have
just bought the ticket for me."
"Three hour," Shampoo mumbled. "Ship sink three
hour."
"I know that Shampoo," Nabiki said irritably. "What
did you want to ask me?"
"Have another favor to ask," Shampoo said groggily.
"Oh, well," Nabiki said cheerfully. "To the office
then." She turned in the direction of her favorite
diner.
"Talking you very expensive," Shampoo complained as
she dragged along behind.
"But I get the job done," Nabiki noted.
By the time they reached the diner most of the
numbing effect that the movie had on Shampoo had worn
off.
"Just to warn you," Nabiki said as she sat down.
"I'll listen to your request, but I think I'm through
with doing people favors."
"Why you say that?" Shampoo asked, dismayed. "You
still think about spatula-girl?"
"She could have been killed," Nabiki shivered. "Or
worse. I...underestimated Kuno. I don't want to take
that risk again."
"Shampoo want you get rid of Kuno," the amazon said
then. Nabiki turned to her intrigued.
"Huh?" then she realized. "Ah, you're thinking that
now that Ukyou is out of the way that it's time to go
for Kodachi."
"I tell grandma you very smart," Shampoo said
proudly. "Crazy-girl very annoying."
"That she is," Nabiki agreed. "I don't think she's
much in the way of competition, however. On the other
hand, she is rich, beautiful, and if you survive the
drugs she can cook pretty good, hmm."
"What you mean?" Shampoo asked darkly.
"Relax, Kitty," Nabiki said calmly. "I'm simply
being objective here. She has nothing on you after
all."
"Aiya!" Shampoo agreed readily, virtually preening.
"Well getting rid of Kodachi will be a tough one,"
Nabiki said. "She's as persistent as Tatewaki at
times. At least she can admit defeat, though, hmm.
Thirty thousand yen should cover it."
"Aiya," Shampoo repeated, in somewhat depressed
voice.
"Hey, we're talking about some one that owns a pet
alligator here."
"nnnhhh...." Shampoo concentrated hard and then
nodded resignedly. "Okay."
"Shampoo!!!!" somebody shouted from the entrance of
the diner.
"Errgg!! Is stupid Mousse," Shampoo growled. Then
suddenly something cold and wet splashed her and
Shampoo-Neko was sitting in Shampoo's spot on the
bench.
"Here, Kitty," Nabiki called. Understanding her
plan, the Jusenkyo cursed Amazon bounded under the
table and up into Nabiki's lap.
"Shampoo!!! I've come to ask if you would date with
me!!" Mousse yelled into Nabiki's face.
"Yo, blind-boy," Nabiki snapped. "Put your glasses
back on!" Mousse did so and closely examined the
person he was talking to.
"You're not Shampoo," he said unnecessarily. "Hey,
that rabbit looks familiar."
"Mousse, why are you here?" Nabiki asked,
irritably.
"Cologne said that I might find Shampoo here in the
presence of one Nabiki Tendo, but I don't see either
here. Have you seen them, Miss Shiratori?"
"I am certainly not Azusa," Nabiki said evenly.
"Really? Who are you then?"
"Why, I'm Nabiki, of course. Perhaps you should get
some new glasses, Mousse."
"Nabiki? Then have you seen Shampoo?"
"I saw her earlier," Nabiki admitted. "She paid up
some past debts."
"Shampoo owed money to you?" Mousse sounded
surprised.
"Everybody owes me something," Nabiki whispered,
conspiratorial. Then she stood up, cradling
Shampoo-Neko. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I have other
business to attend to." She started to walk away. "Oh,
by the way, that was an excellent game you played last
week."
"Game? Wha-" Mousse blanched.
"The fight after they...'caught' you was even more
impressive."
"You know about that?"
"Hmm, yes," Nabiki left him with that before
leaving the diner. Mousse never noticed that she had
snatched Shampoo's clothes from the bench opposite her
seat. Actually, he never even saw the clothes, he saw
a colorful smudge that might have been a purse.
Nabiki walked along with Shampoo-Neko unhappily in
her arms, until she reached the Tendo dojo.
"Hey Nabiki," Akane waved as her older sister
passed. Then she wrinkled her nose. "Why did you bring
her over here?" Shampoo-Neko hissed at Akane, who
bihhed the cat in return.
"I haven't decided yet," Nabiki answered dryly. Of
course she went straight to the bathroom. The girl
deposited the cat on the tile with her clothes and
filled the bathtub with hot water. "Go ahead and
change, I'll wait."
"Why you not just pour hot water on head?" Shampoo
asked as soon as she stepped out of the bath. "You do
that Airen all the time."
"His clothes stay on him when he changes," Nabiki
pointed out.
"Oh," Shampoo paused and rolled her eyes to a
corner of the ceiling. "Shampoo ask another favor?"
"Let me guess," Nabiki held up a hand to forestall
the Amazon asking the question. "Get rid of Mousse for
you?"
"Aiya!" Shampoo nodded once vigorously.
"Fifty thousand yen." Shampoo visibly paled. "Ukyou
was and Kodachi is going to be easy compared to that."
"Aiya," Shampoo agreed despondently. Then she
blinked. "Where is spatula-girl?"
"Ryouga picked her up from the clinic."
"Ohh."
"As long as we're here," Ukyou sighed. "Perhaps we
should enjoy it."
"It's harder than it looks," Ryouga told her.
"Hey, we're thousands of miles away from Ranma,
Akane, and K- that whole mess," Ukyou noted. "What's
not to enjoy?" A car passed through a puddle by the
sidewalk they were walking along and splashed the
pair.
"Damn insensitive drivers!!!" Ukyou shouted.
"Ryouga, could you...." Ukyou looked back and couldn't
see the lost boy.
"Kamisama," Ukyou gasped. "He's lost!!" Then she
heard an angry bwee and after some difficult neck
craning and wheel-chair maneuvering she finally caught
sight of a familiar form.
"P-Chan!!!" she shouted. "Ryouga, you're P-Chan!!"
"Bwee!!!" The pig fainted.
=====
"Caffeinated Kender? What's that, a berserk spell?" -
Tribble, Kender Warrior of the Celestial Kingdom
Signed
He of Too Many Names (Thrythlind/Thryth/Luke/Hyperbole/Pika/Pooka)
http://members.aol.com/thrythlind/snake.html
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