OK, I admit you've piqued my interest with this story so far. It's well written and obviously quite a different start. My only problem with it is that there seem to be gaps in the exposition. Akane seems awfully eager for an arranged marriage, but it's not until the very end of this chapter that we really get any inkling as to why. Even then, there's still some mystery (to me, anyway). Is Akane genuinely ugly in this altaverse or does she just consider herself to be ugly. From the other characters' reactions to her, I'd guess the latter, but I just don't know. I dunno, I just think I wanted more in the way of explanation. I realize this would violate the "show, don't tell" rule, but, sometimes, exposition is necessary.
I don't mean to say here that you have to explain every little thing all in one big chunk at the beginning, but I, for one, was somewhat mystified by how Akane acted, and I thought maybe a little background would help. Consider the following exchange:
"Arranged marriage? That doesn't sound so bad," Akane
said, not hiding her enthusiasm very well.
"Not so bad? Akane, that's easy for you to...o-oh, sorry,
Akane I didn't mean it like that," Nabiki said, regretting
the words. She looked down at the table, rather than see
hurt on Akane's face.
I assume you meant to flesh out why Nabiki acted this way in more detail later on, but it really left me wondering. A few paragraphs after this, you wrote:
Akane listened intently for any knowledge of what Ranma was
like. Despite the insult, Nabiki was right, it was a good
opportunity for Akane. At worst, she could hold her own
against him if he turned out to be a jerk.
It seems to me you could indicate in some way why Akane considered it an insult here, that would be enough. Little touches like that could shed some light on what's happening without giving it all away in one big lump.
Then again, perhaps you intended it to be mysterious. If so, then you did a good job, because I didn't have a clue as to what was happening. But I think you'd be better off giving us some context here. You don't need a lot, I think, just something to give meaning to what's happening in the story.
For example, consider how Takahashi set us up for how the girls would react to the engagement. The discussion between Nabiki and Akane before they knew of it not only established Akane's hostility towards boys, it also showed that Nabiki was interested in boys. Thus, their reactions to news of the engagement was understandable.
I'd be curious to know if others had the same reaction or if I'm the only one...
Nevertheless, I'd like to see where you go with this.
tom