Hi!

Well, feedback to the last one of these I sent out was surprisingly positive, so here's the latest one, with another little anime bit at the bottom.  Looking forward to seeing what new shows might be starting soon....

Anothing thing, not mentioned in the journal, but that needs to be mentioned: haircuts in Japan are bloody expensive!  I just spent 3500 yen -- that's about $40 CDN -- for a bloody haircut!  On the other hand, you do get the royal treatment, including shave and massage.

Well, here you go, hope you enjoy, and once again, if anyone has any specific questions or something they'd like me to look-up, or write about, let me know!

-Michael Noakes

noakes_m@hotmail.com
http://www.geocities.com/noakes_m
***
Tuesday, March 28th, 2000


Moments of transition have always proved good points in
which to write down reflections on the past, and right now
certainly feels like such a time.  The Japanese school year
ended last Friday, and spring break (haru-yasumi) started
yesterday.  It also feels like a transition from the hibernation of
the winter months into the warm rebirth of spring -- which might
sound somewhat corny, but is certainly appropriate to Japan,
for this week signals the beginning of the sakura (cherry-
blossom) season.  Life, in other words, is good.

Last Thursday was important, it being the day that all the
teachers received the notification of whether they were going to
be changing schools or not.  The Japanese school system runs
differently than back home.  The school board requires that
teachers change schools frequently, to combat, they say,
complacency in the workplace.  So, once assigned to a school,
a teachers is guaranteed maybe only three or four years there;
after that, every year at around this time, they receive
notification of whether they're staying or leaving.  It can be a
fairly traumatic time, for while the teachers know to not grow
too attached to a school, it still inevitably happens.  Friday was
the closing ceremonies for the school year, and all the leaving
teachers gave their farewell up on stage.  There were many a
teary eye during the ending school song.  One young female
teacher, for whom this was her first school, was particularly
sad, and so were her students
   It's a significant moment for ALTs as well, although in a
purely selfish manner.  After all, you do form friendships and
working relationships with many of the teachers, and you
certainly don't want to lose those you get along and work well
with (while secretly hoping that those you dislike are transferred
away.)  Sadly, I did lose a few teachers I like, and I'll miss
them at future enkai (office parties).  Fortunately, my teacher-
supervisor Yamamoto-sensei is remaining another year; she's a
wonderful woman, and I'd miss her if she left.  On a slightly
frightening note, my boss (school-board supervisor) has been
promoted to vice-principal, and come the new semester, he'll
be working at junior high again -- at my base junior high, of
course.  Well, we'll see how that works out.
   Although last Friday was the end of the semester,
Graduation day for the third year students took place one week
previously.  That was an even more tearful event, and many
teachers were very sad to see their students leave; many a
student was sad to leave as well.  Reluctant as well; only in a
Japanese school would teachers have to patrol the area (by
foot and car!) to ensure that all students had actually left.  I
spent over an hour standing by the gate waving bye to students
and making sure they didn't come wandering back in.  It was a
great day, though.  I signed yearbooks (got one for myself as
well), and had my picture taken by leaving san-nensei (third-
grade) students again, and again, and again.  Very cool.
   Interestingly enough, though perhaps unsurprisingly, the
students who were the most torn-up about leaving were the
'bad' students -- the worst of the boys sank into a huddle and
covered his face while saying his goodbyes to the teachers.
Though a source of violence within the school, though he never
attended class, though he had little to no respect for both
teachers and other students: junior high remained his home for
three years.  Now?  He likely has nowhere to go, and few
prospects within Japanese society, short of being scouted by
the yakuza or something.  After all, what's considered the usual
'bottom-grade' employments out west, like say McDonalds or
convenience store clerk, require high school diplomas minimum,
here.  And high school isn't an option for him, since secondary
education is not considered mandatory, and entrance is both
expensive and based upon successfully passing the entrance
exam.
   Of course, both these events, the graduation and ending
ceremonies, were leading up to last Friday's mandatory
soubetsukai (farewell party), in which I managed to get myself
right and properly bollixed.  My base-school, Kita (fat tree!)
has a great atmosphere, wonderful teachers, and throw the
greatest enkai, and partying with them is always a pleasure.  It
gets a bit expensive, at times (Friday night cost 5000 yen for
the party, and 4000 yen for farewell gifts), but I always make
an effort to attend, no matter how strapped for cash I am.  It's
an important and essential way -- almost one of the only ways -
- to get to know some of your teachers better.  It's also a hell
of a good time.
   As my friends here put it, I was in fine form by the end
of Friday night.  After drinking myself silly at the enkai, I
followed the remaining teachers to the usual nijikai (second
party).  There was a little dissension among the ranks as to
where to go next, and I followed one group at random to what
turned out to be. . . well, something between a snack bar and a
strip bar.
   A little explanation is needed, perhaps.  I trust 'strip
bar' doesn't require any further words, but 'snack bars' are, I
believe, a unique Japanese creation.  They're costly bars
(usually about 3000-5000 yen cover) oft visited by salarymen,
where the drinker is kept company by the establishment's
(more or less) beautiful waitresses.  Essentially, you're paying
extra (a -lot- extra) to have a girl sit and talk with you, and
serve you drinks.  It's important to note that this isn't
prostitution -- though the potential is obviously there, and it
does happen, I've been told -- but merely an extra. . . what,
service?  A bit odd, certainly, and maybe slightly pathetic, but
then again, most of the men using these services aren't
necessarily doing so out of loneliness.
   I've never actually been to a snack bar -- well, that's
not true, that transvestite bar I mentioned I went to way back
turned out to be one.  I was actually annoyed by the waiters
constantly hanging about, although the girls I was with had the
time of their life.  I've had a few friends work in snack bars,
one of whom is even a gaijin, and it's been a good source of
money for them -- many foreign women coming to Japan have
found snacking to be a great source of extra revenue.
Personally, I haven't found snack bars that interesting: too
expensive, and what's the point of paying some girl to talk to
you, if you can't understand what she's saying?  (You'd
probably just end up getting used as a free English language
lesson, anyway.)  And before this is taken as the definitive
proof that Japan is a male-dominated society (you need
proof?), remember that there are male-snack bars as well.
That's right, I could get a job as a snack-bar waiter, if I wanted
to!  (I don't.)
   Anyway, the bar I went to, which I'll probably never
be able to find again, even if I wanted to, was something similar
to a snack bar, in that it cost 3 or 4 000 yen to get in (which in
the end wasn't so bad, because it was all-you-can-drink -- I
hope, since I didn't pay on the way out), and there was, in fact,
a large number of female waitresses who served drinks.  The
unique spin was that they were all topless.  Wearing really short
skirts.  Without underwear.  Pretty funny, actually.  I was drunk
-- really drunk -- but not nearly drunk enough to fail to notice
that these girls weren't exactly the prettiest specimens out there.
I was drunk enough, however, to pay 1000 yen for a dance:
sort of like a short, western-style lap-dance, but you get a
handful of breast thrown in the deal.
   What I did notice, though, which made the bar, and
most other snack-style bars across Japan, very different from
anything similar back home, was the lack of bouncers.  It's just
assumed there won't be any violence, I guess -- and from what
I've seen, usually there isn't!  (Note, however, that I haven't
seen the nightlife in any of the really big cities yet, like Osaka or
Tokyo.  I'd assume that a dance club in Shinjuku, for instance,
would have -some- kind of protection against rowdiness.)
   And, anyway, that was pretty much Friday night.  Well,
there was the sanjikei and yojikai I went to with friends (more
drinks, more karaoke) afterwards, but you've probably heard
enough already about my drunken escapades.  Suffice it to say
that I swapped shirts in a bar, tried to make obscene print-club
of my crotch, and sang karaoke like I've never sang karaoke
before.
   But what's this 'print club' thing of which you speak,
you ask?  It's a wonderful concept, although it seems to be a
bit past its heyday now.  You'll find them everywhere across
Japan, of varying quality and size and theme.  What it boils
down to is a photo-booth you can squeeze into with a friend
(or many) and have your picture taken, often framed by bit of
art or with a caption added.  A moment later, a sheet of small
half-inch stickers with you photo emerges, and you're done!
It's actually a lot cooler than it sounds, and I've discovered that
print-club (mostly called 'seal' here) makes for a great prize to
give students.
   And that, for the most part, was my weekend; hope the
asides were of some interest.

So, before accusations of my imminent decent in alcoholism
begin anew, what else have I been up to for the last month?
Mostly work, of course, doing my duties as a JET, but a couple
of interesting things cropped up there, as well.
   When you're first getting hired, you're warned as to the
inquisitiveness of the students, and of the rather rude questions
they might occasionally ask -- in fact, you're even quizzed on
what your reaction would be to such a question during the
interview (well, I was, at least.)  So, girls coming here are often
asked, say, their cup size and three measurements, and guys
might (though more rarely) get asked how well hung they are,
or something.  There's comments, too, of course, about your
nose size, or eye colour, or hair, or height. . . and so on.  I
escaped the worst of the questions, for the most part, but I got
stumped on one recently.  I was eating lunch with one of my
san-nensei classes (though not strictly a duty, I've made it a
point of eating with a different class every lunch; it's just a good
way to get to know your students better, even if, especially at
first, you often have very quiet meals), and I could see a small
group of guys trying to build up the courage to ask me
something.  You can tell, they've got this little dance of English-
nervousness they do, and lots of frequent janken-ing (rock-
paper-scissors) to determine who'll deliver the question.
Finally one guy built up the courage and asked me if I had a
girlfriend -- or if I had ever had a girlfriend (I think the second,
but it's a fairly advanced grammar point, so it didn't quite come
out right.)  No big deal, but the follow-up (after even -more-
hesitation) was whether I was a 'Jerry-boy'?  A what?  I had
some vague suspicions of a kind of 'Jerry Maguire' allusion, but
what he actually meant was 'cherry-boy': was I a virgin?
Unexpected, and, in the end, quite funny.  Guess you've just
got to keep a sense of humour about these things,
   On a completely unrelated note, I discovered that the
English saying 'to sleep like a log' has an interesting equivalent
here: "dorono youni nemuru" -- to sleep like mud.  When you
think about it, they're both pretty silly.
   I got called in to teach on a Saturday about a month
ago, two classes about Canada.  It was my first time teaching
on a Saturday, and I discovered that Saturday classes were
simply a very bad idea.  For those unfamiliar with the Japanese
system, students (and teachers, of course) have a half-day of
school on every second Saturday.  It used to be every
Saturday, but that was recently pulled back -- and therein lies
the problem.  The classes of that day are a joke, and the
students know it; they don't want to be there, they don't care,
and given leeway, they simply won't listen.  I'll admit, my
lesson plan for the class was a bit weak, but the ichi-nensei
(first grade) classes I had to teach had much better things to do
with their Saturday morning than listen to some guy talk about
Canada in a language they couldn't understand, with translation
coming from a teacher who, herself, could barely either speak
or understand the language.  The only part where they actually
payed attention was when I showed them an example of
Canadian music.  I popped in a Our Lady Peace video, and
they got a kick out of that (and the few seconds of Korn they
saw after that frankly scared them, I think.)  And, even though
those two classes rank among the worst I've ever had to teach,
it was a good experience, and the appreciation of the teachers
afterwards was really nice.  They like seeing that the JET is
willing to put in some effort beyond the immediate dictates of
his contract.  And why not?  Considering the money we get
payed, we ought to be pleased to, but even more importantly, it
usually proves to be a lot of fun.
   (Incidentally, Saturday classes are being weeded out
come 2002.  Teachers are ecstatic.)
   As the semester drew closer to the end, the number of
classes the ALT is asked to teach usually dwindle, since final
exams review takes precedence over English conversation
practice.  In my case, however, I was asked to conduct a
number of 'interview tests' with the san-nensei, to help them
prepare for their high school entrance exams (in which English
plays a part.)  These proved surprisingly fascinating.  One
student (Baba-kun) gave me a tsuba, a katana sword-guard;
his grandfather used to be a katana-smith, although now he only
forges simple tools.  Another student's father was a shiatsu
masseuse, and the son studied it as well; he tried demonstrating
it by squeezing on the pressure point near my elbow, and from
the way he was searching my face, he was obviously trying to
get some expression of pain or surprise out of his I, his teacher,
but. . . well, I've had that same point attacked by far, far
stronger than he, so the pain was easy to ignore, and I wasn't
about to give the little bugger the satisfaction, anyway.  He also
did some moxibustion, which is the relief of pain by the
application of heat at specific points.  I was actually quite
impressed, he was quite good, especially for a fifteen year old.
With both students, I saw opportunity: it's been a long (if
hopeless) dream of mine to someday forge my own katana, and
I'm also interested in shiatsu -- but sadly, both possibilities
came to naught.
   About a month ago, I went on a trip with the teachers
from my base school.  Every year, Kita organizes a trip
somewhere; this year, it was to Yamaguchi-ken, the
westernmost prefecture on Honshu, and they were kind enough
to invite me along.  Most certainly an interesting trip, although I
discovered that the Japanese have raised (or is that reduced,
Joe?) tourism to a science.  Booked tour bus, drive to location
A, jump out, take pictures, back on the bus, next stop. . . and
so on.  I'd seen it before, on the receiving end, when busloads
of people would unload in front of the Governor General's
residence in Ottawa, and unleash a flurry of photographs at the
unflinching, ever-poised and handsome guard (ie., me), but
being the tourist myself this time, was. . . odd.  Taking pictures
of ye-old historical bridge pales, eventually, and I gave up
bringing my camera to every place we visited, which was
unfortunate, since I did stumble across some truly interesting
sites.  Highlights included eating fugu (puffer fish, yes, the fabled
ultra-poisonous type of sashimi, it's quite tasty, actually),
soaking at an onsen in Yamaguchi city, visiting St. Xavier's
church (odd, visiting a church in a non-Christian country; very
odd, actually, and the church looked and -felt- very. . .
unchurch like), seeing an old, traditional samurai dwelling, and
checking out the few remaining ruins of old Hagi castle.
   (Actually, I'm a little ashamed of that last one.  The
ruins site atop a small mountain, and it's quite the climb to reach
it, although the route itself is very beautiful.  It did take longer
than I expected, however, and by the time I reached the top I
suddenly realized that I truly and urgently had to take a dump --
and there was nary a toilet in site.  What was I to do?  Well, I
suppose I can now say that I've shat on a site of historical
significance.)
   Finally, I was asked to take on a special duty that
proved to be most interesting.  There's a very prestigious
study-abroad program offered to Japanese English-teachers, in
which successful applicants study English for a full year in either
America, England, or Australia.  Unfortunately, only two
people can be accepted, and this year there were nine
applicants, so I was asked to assist in the interview process.
I've done many an interview, but this time (for the first time) I
sat on the other side of the table.  It was the classic stressful
scenario, too, with a long room, single chair in the middle,
across from a long table with four solemn (actually, I probably
looked happy more than anything) interviewers sitting behind it.
Well, I'm glad I've done it, but having still undergone far more
interviews as the interviewed, I haven't developed any
particular sympathy for the interviewer -- although I have
discovered it can be a very long process of asking the same
questions over and over again.
   That pretty much sums up the last month of work.
Obviously I've left out the -truly- tedious stuff, like the actual
day-to-day teaching and lesson planning, and probably given
the impression that I don't actually -do- much, here in Japan.  I
do work, honestly!  Although I will admit that the last few
weeks have been easy, due to the year's end, and the next
week, what with it being spring break (for all of a week and a
half), should also prove quiet (as you could no doubt tell from
the length of this update).  But once the school year begins, and
the new ichi-nensei (first graders) show up, and the new
teachers settle in. . . well, it'll be busy time again.
   (I'm hoping, though, that with eight months of lesson
plans built up, it'll be easier to prepare even better lessons for
my second year around.  I actually felt quite guilty with one of
my lessons, practising English listening via music video -- by
using the Backstreet Boys.  The Backstreet Boys!  Ugh.  I've
heard 'Show me the Meaning of Being Lonely' so often I've
memorized the stupid thing.  The students -loved- it, though: the
Japanese, from what I've seen, both young and old, are great
fans of cheeze.)

So what else can I possibly ramble on about?  Not much to say
on the personal front, just hanging out with friends, and the one
possibility I was pursuing seems to have stalled of late (and to
think I suffered through Notting Hill for her, too!)  Studying
Japanese a lot harder these days, have tutoring twice a week
and classes of Saturday should resume within a few weeks, and
I'm still doing a little studying everyday on my own.  I've got
about a hundred kanji or so down, and speaking skills are
getting better (although my vocabulary is still annoyingly limited,
and I can't get that damn 'd-r-l' sound down), but my listening
comprehension still sucks.  One disadvantage I've discovered,
however, with improving conversation skills is that, if you're
trying to chat-up some Japanese girl, and you run out of things
to say, you can't really hide behind your incompetence with the
language anymore.  Not that this has ever happened to me, of
course.  Planning a big trip for Golden Week (a long string of
statutory holidays in early April, giving me a full nine days off):
looks like I'll be heading to Beijing, via Korea.  I started
planning it, and two girls invited themselves along -- which is
handy, actually, since one of them speaks Cantonese.  Next
weekend I'm headed to Osaka, finally, although that'll put an
end to the money I have allocated for 'fun', meaning that the
rest of the month ought to be rather quiet.
   The Playstation 2 was released here on March 4th,
amongst much fanfare and an immediate sell-out, but from what
I've seen and played of it so far, I'm quite unimpressed and
giving it a pass for now (the 40 000 yen price tag was a factor).
Starting reading French books (which are surprisingly cheap
here) in an attempt to shore up my rapidly declining French
skills.  Japanese television still makes little sense to me, although
it remains a hoot to watch (and I'm saddened that I have yet to
watch the ever famous 'Iron Chef' show).  The short-lived but
beautiful sakura season begins very shortly.  And I really, really
love karaoke.
   That, I suppose, is all there is to say.

-Mike Noakes

(I had considered including, like in previous updates, little
observations about life in Japan, but considering the already
excessive length of this document, I'll wait until next time.)

FFML Exclusive!

Thanks to the help of Donny Cheng, I found a listing of the
anime currently playing on the major Japanese networks -- so
now, I actually know the names of some of the shows I've
been following.  Check out http://www.ex.org/remote/ for
what's on.  The times don't quite coincide with the schedule
over on my end of Japan, but I'm fairly remote, so I'm guessing
it's just a case of the local channels picking the shows up off the
major networks.  Obviously I won't go through every show
(and there's a number of them on the list that I simply haven't
seen), but I'll give a little synopsis and update on the series I've
been following, and ones I didn't mention in the past.
   Incidentally, series seem to be drawing to a close, or
some kind of climax, and during the current spring break, some
shows are suspended with replays taking their place.  Not that I
mind, of course!  They played a Detective Conan movie
last week, and just yesterday they played one of the earlier
Dragonball (Goku was still a kid with a tail) movies (first time I'd seen it, and most certainly very cool.  Note to the wise: don't piss Goku off by killing one of his friends; and when he starts glowing blue, and people start chanting in the background music, and he unleashes a massive pillar of energy that roils the very skies above, -don't- stand around in your supposedly invincible mecha, laughing. . . run away, very, very quickly.)

Anyway, some of the current shows:

ROKUMON TENGAI MONKORE KNIGHT

   And I wonder why I missed the title on this one.  Yet
another of the multitude of M:TG style card game-based
animes plaguing the airwaves, this one is so blatantly a
commercial tie-in as to be obscene.  There's just something
offensive about them flashing the actual cards that the monsters
are based on, on screen, during an episode.  The only saving
grace of this show is that the main bad-guy, and his cohorts, are
extremely funny.  I haven't been following this series, and when
you get down to it, why would anyone?  At best, it's mildly
amusing crap.

BIKKURIMAN 2000

   Somewhat more of a kiddie-show, and goofier art and
animation, but with one of the funniest opening and closing bits
I've seen.  Seems to have some kind of mythic base, although I
haven't quite determined if it's Norse or Greek -- I think the
old man that 'leads' the heroes (in the typical old-man hentai
Japanese anime way) is supposed to be Odin.  For some
reason, he's currently trapped in the girl-hero's keitai (cell-
phone).  Another anime where the bad-guys certainly steal the
show: the main baddie, who's name, I believe, is either Baka or
Bakara (insert obvious jokes here), flies around in his peddle-
powered hovership.  Since he does the peddaling himself, he's
obviously in pretty good shape, and he's got a predilection for
blowing things up with his bazooka.  A surprisingly entertaining,
if childish, anime.

EARTH DEFENSE INDUSTRY DIE-GUARD

   I've mentioned this show before, under the name
Daigado (it's what the katakana says, I assumed it was 'Big
Guard') and I just thought I'd mention how good this show has
turned out to be.  It seemed, at first, to be a bit of a poor-man's
Evangelion that followed the monster-of-the-week formula
closely, but as the season has progressed it's changed into an
entertaining, interesting show, based around an outdated,
modular design mecha requiring three pilots.  I'm not sure, but I
think the season ended with last night's episode, in which
Daigado and another (more advanced) mecha teamed up to
save the city from annihilation.  Very cool climatic battle.
   Incidentally, it does seem to have a lot of Evangelion-
type characters in it, but with the melodrama replaced with a
certain light-heartedness.  There's even a Gendou-type boss,
but he's not half as. . . what, manically evil?
   It's certainly the best mecha-style anime I've currently
got access to on TV.  Keep an eye out for it.

JIBAKU-KUN

   Another series that I've mentioned earlier, and that has
turned out to be quite good, right up to (what I assume is) the
season's climax.  The animation's a bit weak on this one, and
the art extremely odd, but the plot leading to the uncovering of
the GC mystery (once they stumble onto it), and Jibaku's past,
keeps the series running at a brisk and interesting pace.  But
what really makes this show cool is those nifty balls with the
little arms and legs, and giant mouths, that they through around
and blow each other up with.  The series' music is excellent,
too, with great opening and closing songs by major recording
artists.  Another series worth keeping an eye open for, should it
ever make it overseas.

MUGEN NO RYVIUS

   It took me forever to get the name of this show down.
Another one most certainly worth keeping an eye open for,
although I can't really tell you what it's about. . . the plot seems
complex enough, with quick-paced dialogue, that I've only got
the most marginal of clues as to what's going on.  Pretty
exciting stuff, though, what with the crew of this ark-type ship
barely escaping death and destruction every week -- I really
wish I knew who the enemy that keeps attacking them was.
Some interesting mecha design, and a mystic-style girl who
floats around in space and wears an outfit utterly unsuited for
such a cold environment, round this show off.

CYBORG KURO-CHAN

   One of the few early Saturday morning animes (well,
early for me, it plays around 8:30).  Not a very serious show,
about a cybernetic cat stumbling into various problems and
fights, when all he really wants to do is lounge around all day
with his adopted family (an oblivious elderly family, who don't
even notice when they're kidnapped by aliens.)  The Remote
Access synopsis says he fights evil, but they're not so much evil
as goofy -- the mad scientist (complete with comb-over) who
created Kuro is a good example.  Oh, and as far as I can tell,
Kuro's completely psychotic: he may enjoy laying around, cat-
like, but he never seems quite as happy as when he's unleashing
megadeath with his vulcan-canon arm attachment.  Cute, but
miss-able show.

GTO

   I've mentioned this show before, and I'll do so again.
Great stuff, and keep an eye open for it, it's bound to make it
over to North America in translation eventually.  I'm not a big
fan of fanfic crossovers, especially with Ranma 1/2, but this
show would just be so -perfect-.  I mean, ex-punk tough guy
expert martial-artist teacher recognized for his incredible ability
to solve the problems of delinquent, troubled schools, who just
so happens to live and work in Nerima?  The guy's just waiting
for a transfer to early-series Furinkan.
   Currently in it's second season, I haven't really seen a
hint of a single, overriding plot running through the series, but
the episodic nature of the show works quite well, anyway.
Only disappointment was that they changed the great Season
One opening theme song (and animation) by L'Arc-en-ciel, to
some new J-Pop group (still not all that bad, really).  The
quality of animation seems to be slipping slightly, though.
   If the anime isn't available, the manga has started to
come out in bilingual translation via Kodansha Bilingual books.
The translation's a bit coarse, though: somehow, I seriously
doubt they swore quite that much in the original.
   I'd say GTO's in my top-three currently on tv, with
One Piece and Daigado rounding it off.


______________________________________________________
Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com