This spamfic is an answer to a perceived challenge
(meaning I felt challenged even though I wasn't
being challenged) from Ammadeau:
True, but just because you can have Gendo dance the
watusi in a pink tu-tu doesn't mean that you should,
does it?
*evil laugh* We'll see about that....
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N e o n G e n e s i s E v a n g e l i o n
T H E M U S I C A L
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A MUSICAL IN ONE ACT
ACT I
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SCENE I
[apartment]
Misato: Ohayo Gozaimasu, Where the hell is my beer?
Shinji: Ohayo, Misato-san, you always keep it near.
Misato: Heh-heh - Not funny! I don't see it here.
Shinji: Misato-san, you're such a slob
You really tend to remind me of
A redneck named Jimbo Bob!
Misato: Shutup, Shinji-kun, no breakfast is complete
Without the substance fermented from
golden ripened wheat!
Shinji: That's it! I'm gone! I'll see you after school.
And while I'm away I expect you to clean
This smelling, rotting cess pool.
Touji/Kensuke: Ohayo gozaimasu, Ikari-kun!
Shinji: Come on, let's go, I want away from this loon.
Touji/Kensuke: Misato-san! Swoon, swoon, swoon.
SCENE II
[On the way to school]
Shinji: I really can not see why you adore Misato.
Kensuke/Touji: OH OH OH OH OH OH MISATO
Shinji: I tell you she's a real mess.
Kensuke/Touji: She is worth the test!
Shinji: Here we are, we must go in.
Kensuke/Touji: IN IN IN IN IN IN IN IN
Hikari: Hello, Touji. Do not be moron.
Touji: You doubt me? We'll not be getting it on.
Hikari: You are such an idiot, such a stupid Baka.
Shinji/Kensuke: BAKA BAKA BAKA BAKA BAKA
Rei: Shinji-kun, we have been called to work.
Shinji: Fine let's go. My father is a jerk.
SCENE III
[Central Dogma]
Gendou: Shut-up Shinji.
Shinji: I haven't said a word.
Gendou: Shut-up Shinji.
Fuuyutsuke: You will fight another angel. You do it everyday.
Gendou: You will shut your mouth, and do as I say.
Ritsuko/Makoto/Miya: DO AS HE SAYS, DO AS HE SAYS, DO AS HE SAYS.
Gendou: You will board your Eva, and you will save the day.
Fuuyutsuke: Go fight the angels, keep them at bay.
Ritsuko/Makoto/Miya: KEEP THEM AT BAY, KEEP THEM AT BAY, KEEP THEM AT BAY!
SCENE IV
[The Streets of Tokyo-3]
Shinji: Target in the center, pull the switch.
Angel: ...
Shinji: Target in the center, pull the switch.
Angel: ...
Shinji: Target in the center, pull the switch.
Angel: ...
Shinji: Target in the center, pull the switch.
COMPUTER: BA BOOM, BA BOOM, BA BOOM
Angel: EZZZGRIEK *thud*
Shinji: Target in the center, pull the switch.
Misato: Shinji, you're done, you can return.
Shinji: Target in the center, pull the switch.
Misato: SHINJI, TURN TURN TURN!
SCENE V
[NERV Command Center. Entire cast in pink tu-tus. Komm, susser tod plays
softly in the background.]
Gendou: I know, I know I've let you down.
Miya: I've been a fool to myself.
Makoto: I thought that I could live for no one else
Asuka: But now through all the hurt & pain
Rei: It's time for me to respect
Shinji: The ones you love mean more than anything
Misato: So with sadness in my heart
Kensuke: Feel the best thing I could do
Touji: Is end it all and leave forever
Kaoru: What's done is done it feels so bad
Ritsuko: What once was happy now is sad
Gendou: I'll never love again
Miya: My world is ending
Makoto: I wish that I could turn back time
Asuka: Cause now the guilt is all mine
Rei: Can't live without the trust from those you love
Shinji: I know we can't forget the past
Misato: You can't forget love & pride
Kensuke: Because of that, it's killing me inside
Shinji: It all returns to nothing,
All: it all comes tumbling down, tumbling down, tumbling down
Shinji: It all returns to nothing,
All: I just keep letting me down, letting me down, letting me down
Touji: In my heart of hearts
Kaoru: I know that I could never love again
Ritsuko: I've lost everything
All: everything
Gendou: everything that matters to me,
Miya: matters in this world
Makoto: I wish that I could turn back time
Asuka: Cause now the guilt is all mine
Rei: Can't live without the trust from those you love
Shinji: I know we can't forget the past
Misato: You can't forget love & pride
Kensuke: Because of that, it's killing me inside
Shinji: It all returns to nothing,
All: it all comes tumbling down, tumbling down, tumbling down
Shinji: It all returns to nothing,
All: I just keep letting me down, letting me down, letting me down
Shinji: Tumbling down, tumbling down, tumbling down (All: AH AH AH AH AAAAAAH)
Shinji: Letting me down, letting me down, letting me down
(All: AH AH AH AH AAAAAAH)
THE END
Bad, yes. Terrible, yes.
Now, the last fic I sent out was in an unedited format. I have the edited version.
I was stupid. You're still welcome to read it, but it prbably looks like crap. Typos
and such.
Kevin Callahan