One should enjoy this post with generous amounts of a consumamble liquid
for it is very dry and for most part, downright boring.
At 17:31 22.2.2000 +1300, Angus MacSpon wrote:
"I mean, he is the one ?" One could hear the trembling
arched eyebrow and the sweatdrop in the voice.
"Yes."
"You sure about that ?"
"He retrieved Callandor. And the Viridian Stone has
fallen."
"Yes, but him ?"
One could see, well, one could see someone who remarkably
looked like ... well, looked like Nurse Joy from Pokemon dressed
in a blue dress with a blue gem dangling on her forehead. Her
companion was someone who looked remarkably like Misty from the
aforementioned show.
"Yes, it cannot be denied anymore. Ash Al'Ketchum is
the Pikachu Reborn."
Farm Boy... Rodent Trainer... Well, it is an improvement.
Not a big one, but an improvement still.
Even I, the all-knowing female voice of the narrator,
couldn't even comprehend the levels of depravity that the author
of this fic would sink to for a little attention.
As always, she blames Ben Oliver for this.
It is a rather wide-spread misconception, that either Ben Oliver or,
in the case of some people and a few stories, Mike Loader should be
blamed. Not knowing Mr. Loader, I cannot comment on how he could be
held responsible for some past... posts floating around the FFML,
but _knowing_ Ben, at least to some extent, I can guarantee it's not
his fault.
You should be blaming his brother, instead. Ben's the sane and
balanced one in that family.
...
Or maybe not.
No one would come for a few hours. He had time to check
on the other Reis.
Hino Gendou ran his hand through his thinning hair as
he pulled a remote control from his pocket and pushed a button.
A opening revealed itself not far from him, light hitting a
metal staircase.
Gendou chuckled to himself as he swiftly walked down the
staircase. The cover to the entrance smoothly went back to its
original position, leaving the ravens cawing on their perch.
Time to check on the other Reis.
Ah, so. Since he had time to check on the other Reis he decides it's
time to check on the other Reis. Indeed.
*****************************
Ben Oliver, renowned author of Nuke 'Em Till They Glow,
was making an unauthorized cameo appearance. Unauthorized by him,
of course, and considering how much Elsa likes him, this won't
likely be _just_ a cameo.
I'm sure somebody'll tell him. Not that it matters any.
With that note, we go to Ben's drinking partner. An
attractive young woman, with a Hotaru-like hairdo and really
bad taste in clothing. I mean, who goes around wearing a lavender
business suit at a bar ?
Kate Madigan. Or Priss on a really bad day.
"Well, even though they disbanded the other death squads,
at least they kept the Rubber Chicken Guys."
Ah, yes... The Rubber Chicken Guys. It is really sad to witness what
watching a certain Patlabor episode far too many times can cause.
Which just further proves the greatness of Anno.
"I heard the Lurker was beaten to death with a rubber
chicken."
No he wasn't. Lurker's like the Phantom; a man who never dies.
"No. I always thought you were actually an intelligent
chihuahua. A fairly intelligent one, of course, but a chihuahua
nonetheless."
A chihuahua with a mushroom coatin', no doubt.
And you ask me how the hell did Ash Ketchum become the
Pikachu Reborn.
I'm sure he can do a better job than Farm Boy.
Well, what can I say?
Most of the story was twisted and mangled enough to pass, but too much
time was spent explaining things, and too little on twisted and mangled
weirdness. For future episodes, our judges recommend more story, less
explanations, a few mushrooms and an infinite number of Fnords.
- Jussi Nikander