From: "Sonny Taing" <sonny_taing@hotmail.com>
To: ffml@fanfic.com
Subject: [FFML] Pokemon(choices)
Date: Sat, 19 Feb 2000 13:29:55 PST
okay one last time.
< Insert Standard Disclaimer Here>
Okay title for now is Choices, yea kind of stupid but that all I can
think of at the moment. And C&C is welcome. Please C&C.
Prologue:
�It�s over�, Ash thought with a grim smile.
Around him were dozens of pokemon bodies scattered across the room. And
right in front of him was the boss
consider using a better word than ob
of Team Rocket himself, Giovanni. �Damn
you, why did you have to go kill yourself?�
This sounded a bit awkward
�I was supposed to make you pay for what you did to my friends.�
He choked it out as memories came to him.
This seemed to come out that was as well.
First the bomb blowing up the Cerulean city gym, killing Misty and her
sisters, finding out it was Giovanni who did just to help his image by
making a new gym that he�ll own, then he stole pikichu, turning him into
some sort of deformed monster, making me the instrument to put him out of
his misery.
i don't know about a bomb. it sounds too...severe. Something less like
sending hit men to get them or something.
�Damn you to hell.�
Ash again choking out the words, barely enough to make a whisper. Suddenly
the monitor came to life, on it showed Giovanni face hidden behind shadows.
�After all this time, he still hides his face.� Ash thought laughing at the
same time.
Maybe, - thought Ash, as he let out a grim chuckle- would do a bit better
�Well if this video is playing then I must be dead. And by your hands boy.
Well congratulations for killing me.� The recording said with no hint of
malice or insanity in it voice. Suddenly the voice became serious, �Well
boy, you killed me and I think you deserve an award. So I�m transporting
you
back 8 years, and giving you the choice to stop all the problems that I
caused you, goodbye.�
And the world became white.
the plot is good, but maybe the program was designed to kill him, but
accidentally send him back in time instead. And have something to leave the
audience haning by a thread. Have something on the line, put something at
stake that is too important for Ash to lose.
AN: well this is my first story, plus only a prologue so be gentle.
If you�re wondering how Ash is, he 18. Reason that I have him at
age because well, you'll find out sooner or later. All the things
that happened that Ash was talking about happened at age 14. Also
I�m going to have fun playing with Ash�s love life.
Also I picked time when he was 10 because well the whole idea of this story
is about choices, and Geo. Is giving him the chance to stop all this, by
giving him years before anything happens.
You may also noticed that this chapter been kind of watered down.
I understand jus how you feel. It's hard writing a good fic, especially if
you're just begining. So all in all, you did great. keep on writing.
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