Subject: [FFML] Re: Pokemon <prologue>
From: AlphSailor@aol.com
Date: 2/18/2000, 2:50 PM
To: kumon@mailcity.com, ffml@fanfic.com


Hm. Interesting.
Of course, you'll have to explain why Geovianni didn't use his time-machine 
to travel into the past and use his knowledge to maniuplate the events as so 
he would come out as the winner. Quite possibly even convincing MewTwo to 
remain on his side, or finally kick out the useless Jessie/James/Mewoth team, 
pick off Ash before he became a major threat, and so many others.

Even so, if we choose to ignore this tiny questionable factory, you've got an 
interesting prospect. How'd Ash react when he meets his future self? ^_-
Or the future Ash meeting the girl of his love life. Hehe.

Oh, one lastly thing: please format the fic. They just kept on running along 
in 
single linges unless seperated by paragraph breaks. Not a good idea. You 
should 
wrap the story to 80 characters or less (although I'd recommend 74).

P.S.: Don't forget to give your fic a title! ;)


DA/R
Dark Alpha
AlphSailor@aol.com


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