"D.F. Roeder" <dfroeder@flash.net> wrote:
As promised... and extremely belated...
And my somewhat-belated response....
I DREAM OF RANMA
Well... I dream of onna-Ranma, but that's hardly surprising. :)
Considering some of your fics, I can't say I'm surprised to hear it. :-)
Ranma set down the Giant Killer Robots of Death manga he had
been reading. "Really? Where's she go?"
GKRoD? Now if I only had known the name of robot-manga artist, I
could've really been witty. :P
Opportunity lost. :)
Hrm... Nabiki's being as oblique, ungenerous, and crafty as ever.
This was a strange but interesting scene: lot's of overtones for the
future concerning Nabiki and, by extension, other, less-scrupulous
persons.
True, Ranma's getting off relatively easy with her. He might not be so
lucky with other people he meets. Did I mention that Kodachi'll be
showing up before long? :)
What good would telling the truth do? *Yes, Doctor, I'm afraid
this patient seems to be suffering from acute lovesickness,
coupled with
terminal stupidity.* A psychomatic
New! From Ronco!
Or Ranko. :)
psychosomatic
Oops. Will fix.
illness, really. The only cure was
for her to simply to
omit the last "to"
Oops again.
Of course, that wasn't quite true. There were no 'nevers,' not
as long as the Tendos had their own resident genie. Akane's mind
reeled
at the thought. Tofu could be utterly and hopelessly devoted to
her, to
the point of worshipping the ground on which she walked. Just a
few
words to Ranma's cursed form was all it would take.
Well past the point of no return, Akane.
We shall see. :)
*sister* -- the sister who probably probably deserved it less than
any
other person in the world. Using magic to make someone love you
was just
*wrong.* And what would be the point anyway? He wouldn't *really*
love
her -- the magic would only make him think he did.
And he would no longer be the Tofu you have the crush on.
Too true.
*sigh* Akane *really* doesn't understand how her feelings work.
Nope.
"Ranma, Ranma, Ranma. Think of all the poor, innocent little
girls that these boys have taken advantage of. This is not
maliciousness
for the sake of fun. This is just retribution. This is an evening
of the
scales."
Suggest "balancing". "Evening" parses like a time of day here.
Ah. Good idea.
O_o Now Ranma has *two* stickboys to play with! Wheeeee!! :)
Now, if he could only get them to go bother each other and leave *him*
alone....
Muted conversations rumbled
"rumbled" doesn't seem to really go with "Muted conversations."
Murmured?
Hmmm... will think about it.
It wasn't the dress that bothered him. The first few times he'd
worn girls' clothes, they made him feel like throwing up; but now
he
didn't mind at all. Now, he was able to think of "Ranko" as a
different
person. Ranko was wearing the dress. Not him. And there was
nothing
wrong with her doing that, because after all, Ranko was a girl.
And your losing a little bit more of yourself with that kind of
thinking.
Well, I dunno about that. Is he losing himself, or growing beyond his
boundaries? Don't ask me, I just write the stuff. :)
ATARU?! A *friend* of Mendou's?! Hrm... Alt, definitely alt. :)
Did he specify "friend?" I thought it was just "classmate."
"Order any of them that you wish, my dear." Mendo ran a comb
through his already immaculate hair. "Your enjoyment will be far
more
valuable than the cost."
term confusion? I don't think cost can be considered valuable. "Your
enjoyment is worth more than the cost of mere wine." ...or
something.
I see your point. I'll work on this line.
Warning bells began to ring in Ranma's head. Nabiki was trying
to con Mendo into buying things for her. That meant that he had to
put
up with Moroboshi, at least a little. Otherwise he'd blow the date
for
Suggest: Otherwise, he'd...
Okay.
Moroboshi sat up, his expression suddenly sympathetic. "You mean
you have to do that every time? Even with a guy you really like?"
Don't get your hopes up, bub. Ack! He could accidentally wish for
it, though. Yeeeee!!
That's not what he meant by "do." :)
Ataru's life bears remarkable semblance to the training for the
Bakusai Tenketsu. :)
Yeah, except that he's trained against electricity as well. So maybe he
could learn to poke holes in generators? :)
Maybe no one was home. Maybe Tofu was out, and no one would
answer her knock, and she could just leave. She'd go for a quick
dinner
at some out-of-the-way cafe where no one would recogize her. The
two
hour
two-hour
Right.
time limit she'd put on the wish would run out. She'd go back to
normal before anyone saw her and word got back to the real Kasumi
that
she was somewhere tonight where she wasn't and she put two and two
together and realized what a rotten thing her little sister had
been
doing.
I take it Akane has forgotten that tonight is Kasumi's night out. :)
Well, no, but what she means is that she'd be spotted somewhere other
than wherever she actually was.
Curious, Akane leaned over and peered down.
The door opened. Hearing a familiar voice, Akane immediately
pulled open the nearby door and ducked into the other room.
You're right, Akane. It didn't turn out like you thought it would,
heh.
It never does. :)
What is it about lechers that make them top-notch rationalizers? :)
You don't have to rationalize to be a lecher... but it helps!
Still... maybe it would be better to take it a little slower,
Ranko was obviously a shy, delicate flower of a girl.
Suggest: Still... maybe it would be better to take it a little
slower; Ranko was...
Right; as is, it's a run-on.
"Er... thank you." Kasumi pulled back away
Suggest: pulled back -or- pulled away
Okay.
"Shouldn't you go see the doctor, Doctor?
Uh... "...doctor, Doctor?" Intentional gag? :)
Yeah... not much of one, I'll grant you.... :)
Tofu forced a smile onto his face. "Kasumi, I'm fine." He was a
doctor, not a patient. "Let's have dinner, all right?"
Sounds like Tofu has some issues...
Well, we never see him going for treatment in the manga, right?
"Ranma, how do you...." Akane swallowed, feeling a nervous lump
in her throat. "How do you feel about my sister?"
She better hope that her two hours doesn't end soon...
"Your sister? Which one?"
** POOF! **
"Oh, THAT sister!"
*Some genie you are, Ranma,* she thought to herself. *Here I go
and make a wish, and it brings nothing but trouble.* A tiny voice
inside
her told her that from all the legends, wishes leading to nothing
but
trouble was pretty normal for genies; she did her best to ignore
it.
And conveniently ignoring her responsibility for having wished it in
the first place... very Akane.
Yep. She's trying, but she's got a long way to go.
Since we're having Rumiko's Old Home Week, should we expect a visit
>from poor college students and the boarding house managers they
love? Schoolgirls and dog demons? Bits of mermaid flesh? :P
Not in *this* chapter. :) I put Mendo and Ataru in because they fit the
kind of character I needed for this story, basically.
But I can just see it now... Yusaku Godai walking down the street, lost
in his usual daze, as girl-Ranma happens to walk by....
YUSAKU: Oh, Kyoko....
RANMA: Excuse me, could you tell me the way to....
YUSAKU: Kyoko....
RANMA: Huh?
YUSAKU: HOW I WISH YOU LOVED ME!
RANMA: DARLING!
YUSAKU: Huh?
"Doctor... maybe you ought to get some rest?"
He's going to see the head shrinker even if it kills "Kasumi". :)
Yes, actually this whole thing was a clever trick by Kasumi (the real
one) to get him to see the doctor. Yeah, that's the ticket.... :)
Ranma looked back at where Kasumi had appeared, and did a
double-take. She was still there.
Ah, the operative difference between "Kasumi" and "your sister".
Nice.
Yep. You have to pay attention to the fine print. :)
Suddenly, it all made sense. The answer was simple. He resisted
the urge to laugh out loud. Clever, Akane. Really clever.
I just KNOW he's reached an erroneous conclusion. It would be
non-canonical if he didn't. :P
Heh.
Watching surreptitiously from the bedroom through the
cracked-open doorway, Akane shouted silently at her sister. Go,
already!
The time limit she'd set on her wish was going to expire... any
minute
now. According to the digital clock on Tofu's dresser, it was 7:27
PM.
She knew that she'd made her wish sometime around five-thrity,
thirty,
D'oh.
"Oh, don't worry." She chuckled. "I won't wish for anything
bad."
Hrm... didn't learn her lesson very well, did she?
That remains to be seen. It's not easy to learn a lesson. :)
Very nice, all around, Gary. Look forward to the next.
Thanks; I appreciate the comments!
Gary Kleppe
http://www.execpc.com/~kleppe/comics.html