That last one should have been marked, 18, not 17.
-----------
NOTE: All characters original to the Tenchi-Muyo! TV1 series
portrayed in this story, as well as all those from the
Tenchi-Muyo! Ryo-Ohki OVA series, are the sole property of AIC
and Pioneer Animation. Any appearance of them in actual life is
purely coincidental. Tenchi-Muyo! material and paraphernalia
listed within is copyright Pioneer Animation 1997. Kyoto
Minamoto, Muriyaki Kushiragi, Chisako, Chi-Ohki, and all other
related characters are the sole property of R&C Books and appear
through permission from R&C Books. If you would like to use any
of these characters in your work, please contact the licensing
department at RCBooks@hotmail.com or visit our website at
http://members.xoom.com/RC_Books/mugen1.html
.
Send all C&C to muriyaki@hotmail.com (for storyline and fight
scenes) and/or keiichi_dono@scifianime.com
(for intercharacter relationships and continuity). Thanks for
reading!
Episode #19:
No Need for Splashdown!
"Would you hold still!!" demands Washu.
The newly grown Tokimi giggles. "Sorry, Grandma Washu, it just
tickles all over!"
Tenchi quietly groans and shades his eyes from the squirming
naked form of his youngest daughter. Both Kiyones are gripping
Tokimi's shoulders and are firmly trying to keep her steady;
Momoko is trying to hold her feet. They're not having any
success.
Mirei is standing next to her father, clutching his left arm.
"So daddy, she just grew up overnight?"
"That's right, Rei-cha'ya," Tenchi answers wearily.
"It's really tickly! It tickles down here the most!"
Tenchi spins on his heel.
"Thanks for sharing... dearie." Where did this girl get that
kind of... hunger? thinks Washu. Must be from her mother.
"Can't you give her an antiaphrodesiac?" pleads Yoni.
"I would, but she won't stay still long enough for me to
administer it!"
"What if we cuffed her to the table?" asks the first Kiyone.
"And then will you let daddy do me?" asks Tokimi, her eyes
sparkling.
"You certainly will not sleep with your father!" barks Yoni.
"Why not?"
"He's your father!" replies Kiyone-yoni.
"So?"
The two Kiyones stare open-mouthed at their daughter. "So?!"
"I'm so hot.... I need someone to cool me down..." It is at this
moment that her face flushes and a beatific expression drifts
across it. "Too late now..."
Everyone steps back.
"My table!" screams Washu.
"At least you can administer it now..." remarks Yoni.
Tokimi is breathing heavily as she looks over to her father.
"Daddy.... I'm still hungry for your lollipop."
Tenchi's left nostril suddenly shoots a stream of blood, and he
faints.
Tokimi has a disappointed expression on her face. "Oh, damn,
he passed out!"
The first Kiyone sighs. "Hold still, dear, we just need to give
you this shot." She presses the injector against Tokimi's
forearm and hits the release.
"I'm sleepy...." As the antiaphrodesiac hits her blood stream,
Tokimi Masaki slowly goes unconscious.
As soon as she's completely asleep, everyone in the room sighs
in relief.
It's then that they remember the unconscious Tenchi on the
floor.
The two Kiyones carry Tenchi back up to their room, while Mirei
excuses herself from the lab to go and start breakfast.
She is still somewhat confused about her little sister being
more "grown up" than she is.
Washu sighs and starts cleaning up the examination table.
* * *
"Everyone set for splashdown?" asks Kyoto through the intercom.
"This isn't going to be smooth like a normal landing. You're
all going to get a taste of what Earth's astronauts go through
on re-entry."
"We're as ready as we'll ever be," reports Tenchi back through
his open comlink. "Everything in the two houses is strapped
down, and everyone is gathered in the living rooms."
"Alright, preparing to start re-entry."
Kyoto is right; the ride is not pleasant. From the moment they
enter the atmosphere, the occupants of Chisako are thrown around
like billiard balls on a pool table, caroming off each other
as well as the walls and the furniture. By the time they're
entering cloud cover, everyone has at least three or four
bruises.
By the time Chisako slaps down on the surface of the water,
they're moving at roughly Mach 10. The impact against water
gives everyone aboard a few more bruises as the giant spacecraft
disappears beneath the glassy surface of the ocean and grounds
with a soft thud.
After waiting a few moments to make sure the craft will not move
again, Kyoto rises to his feet and opens the intercom. "Welcome
back to Earth. Please place your tray tables in their upright
and locked positions.... thank you for flying Oishii Air." He
then falls back to the ground.
The occupants of the houses slowly rise to their feet. Tenchi,
after helping his wives and daughters to their feet, makes a
head count.
There are two people missing.
"Yoni, where's Kimi-cha'ya?"
Yoni looks at him in confusion. "Huh? You mean she's not here?"
She looks around the room. "My god, Tenchi-yon, you're right!"
Ryoko rushes into the house, a look of worry on her face. "Kyo's
missing!"
"Huh?!" A suspicion starts to form in Tenchi's head. Two young
people with raging hormones, missing at the same time....
"We've got trouble," he announces.
* * *
"Oh... oh... oh.... yes, Kyo.... more.... don't stop!.....
yes, yes, yes, oh god in heaven y--"
At the exact moment Tokimi Masaki's deflowering is completed,
her parents rush into the clearing where Kyo was assisting
her. Kyo's parents are right behind.
The parents of both teenagers stand there gaping for a long,
long, moment staring at their not-so-innocent offspring.
"K-K-Kimi-cha'ya?!" Tenchi finally manages to push out.
Kyo's parents are not so tongue-tied. "Kyo!" bellows Ryoko.
"What in the hell are you doing to your cousin?!"
"Making me warm and happy...." answers Tokimi dreamily. Tenchi
faints, blood shooting from his nose like a cruise missile.
Kiyone-yoni helps him to his feet and heads him back towards
the house, while Yoni helps Tokimi get dressed and gently begins
lecturing her on the irresponsibility of her actions.
Once Tokimi has been escorted away, Mr. and Mrs. Minamoto
glare down at their son, who is hurriedly redressing himself.
Finally rising to his feet, he asks his parents, "You're not
going to do anything to me?"
Kyoto shakes his head.
Ryoko smiles cruelly. "No, we're not, son. We're going to let
her do something to you."
She indicates a seething Momoko standing behind her and her
husband.
Kyo immediately starts running. "I'm out of here!"
Momoko immediately gives chase, screaming, "Onii-chan no
hentai!"
* * *
"Okay, people, here's the plan!" chirps the diminutive scientist
as she happily points her laser pointer at a large holodisplay.
"I assume you're all becoming very sick of fruit, am I correct?"
There is a collective affirmation of Washu's statement.
"Good. Now, a small portion of our group-- preferably three
people or less-- will be traveling to the mainland of the
nearest continent to purchase us real food. The rest of us will
assist in repairing the damage to saucer number five. Namely,
repositioning the saucer into its original configuration."
"How the hell are we supposed to do that?" asks Kyo, gingerly
touching the fading black eye, a souvenir of when Momoko had
finally caught up with her "onii-chan no hentai." "Are we
supposed to be able to lift that saucer?!"
"Yes, with my special strength-enhancing technology and a lot of
anti-gravity units, we should be able to repair that saucer
easily!"
"Who's going onto the mainland?" asks Mitsuki.
"Digital Washu, Kiyone, and Yoni," replies Washu, preparing
herself for the anticipated outburst from Tenchi.
It's not long in coming. "What?!?!?"
Washu holds up her hands in a calming motion. "Tenchi, calm
down...."
Kiyone-yoni and Yoni both take Tenchi's arms, and he calms
himself with an apparent effort. "Washu.... wouldn't it make
more sense to bring at least one man along?" he says carefully,
trying not to sound chauvinistic. "In this world, some people
who see three women all alone without an escort.... they might
be tempted to try something."
Washu raises an eyebrow. "Tenchi, are you implying that your
wives are incapable of defending themselves?"
Tenchi's face flushes red. "No, I am not! But.... I...." He
comes to a stop, knowing what he wants to say but not knowing
how to say it. Kiyone-yoni and Yoni lead him aside, thinking
that maybe he can put it into words for them. After a few
minutes, it appears that they've convinced him, for he nods and
hangs his head. "I don't want you two to go without me.... but
if you must, go ahead."
"Don't worry, Tenchi-yon," assures Kiyone-yoni. "We'll be just
fine. Remember, I was taking care of myself as a GP before we
even met." She places a finger on his lips as he starts to
speak. "I know, I know, you would have if you'd known. But we
aren't defenseless. Both Yoni and I can project Light Hawk
Wings, and she has Kyoto's powers, and I'll take my blaster
and Reiken. We'll be fine."
"Exactly," agrees Yoni, hugging Tenchi's other side. "Don't
worry, Tenchi-yon, we'll come back to you fine."
Tenchi doesn't look much happier, but he nods again. "Fine.
When do you three leave?"
"In a couple of days," explains Digital Washu. "I need to see
what kind of clothing is typical on this planet, and what kind
of money they use, so we can duplicate it."
"How are you gonna find out?" asks Ryoko. "I don't think this
planet has satellites or computer networks for you to hack into,
and finding out personally would necessitate going out."
Digital Washu ponders this. "Hmm, good point.... I guess the
best we can do is using what we know of as fashion from this
time back in our universe. Kyoto, have you been monitoring
radio transmissions?"
Kyoto nods. "Sure have. In this world, the year is 1955, Earth
date."
"All right...." Digital Washu produces the requisite hololaptop
and types into it. Her Science Academy uniform shimmers and is
replaced by a sharp gray dress suit, with matching shoes and
hat. "I believe this will work nicely."
"And what do you suggest we wear?" asks the first Kiyone.
"The same." Digital Washu taps in another sequence, and both
Kiyones reappear in outfits similar to Digital Washu's.
Tenchi looks his two wives up and down slowly and smiles in
approval. "Nice..."
"Thank you, Tenchi-yon!" they chirp in unison.
"Now, going on, Kyoto, have you determined what the dominant
form of currency is?"
Kyoto thinks for a moment, then nods. "The dollar. It's the
American currency, and America runs this world. In fact, it's
the nearest continent."
The two Kiyones turn to Mirei. "Rei-cha'ya, can we trust you to
take care of your father for us while we're gone?"
"Of course, Mommies."
"How many dollars will you need?" asks Kyoto.
"How much do you have in Chisako's treasury?" asks Digital
Washu.
"About five hundred million in 1955 dollars."
"I believe two million will do nicely, plus another two million
in gold ingots," replies Digital Washu. "Now, how were you
planning on making insertion?"
"Sub. We have several submarines aboard Chisako."
"That'll work. Stealth-equipped, I presume?"
"Washu, these are submarines. They're built to be invisible....
and even if not, I've made some.... modifications to these.
There is no problem."
"That's reassuring." Digital Washu turns to the two Kiyones.
"I trust you two will be ready to go in two days. Please don't
get anything on those clothes, we need them as long as
possible."
"What exactly are you implying, Digital Washu?" asks
Kiyone-yoni.
"You know full well what I mean."
"What about the nuke we need to respark the fold drive?" asks
the real Washu.
"We can start looking for that as soon as we have the food in
hand," answers Digital Washu. "The sub will return after
disembarking the girls, and will return to pick up the food and
with help to retrieve the nuclear device."
"But why can't we do both of these things at once?" asks
Mihoshi.
A tanuki comes crashing down on Mihoshi's head. "Because we need
most of us to fix the saucer!" yells Digital Washu.
"Oh.... okay.... it hurts!"
"Anyway.... Once the food has been recovered, reinforcements
will rendezvous with the girls at this place." A picture of a
large military installation pops up. "This is Los Alamos Nuclear
Research Facility. This is the center for all atomic weapons
research in all of North America, and is the best place to find
all prototype weapons. A standard 10 megaton nuclear device
will be adequate."
"And we're supposed to just walk in there and ask for a nuke?"
quips Tenchi.
"Not exactly. I have a personnel roster for the current staff
of the facility. We merely choose the individual we wish to use.
Preferably one who has access to the stockpiles."
"And how did you get that?!" asks Kiyone-yoni.
"Kyoto took the liberty of leaving some stealth satellites
in orbit," explains Digital Washu.
"And how'd that get you the rosters?" asks Tenchi.
"I simply used the satellite to photograph the information
from an officer bringing in the recent duty roster. The reason
we couldn't get any clothing shots was because the satellite
tasked for that duty fell straight down and burned up."
* * *
Nighttime.
Washu is roused by a steady feeling of warmth on the back of her
left hand. Blinking her eyes, she shifts herself slightly
away from Nobuyuki, and looks down at the back of her hand. She
is naturally shocked to find a glowing triangle on it. Her eyes
dart to the clock, which reads.... 3:27 am. Even as weariness
descends upon her once more she can feel herself rising from the
bed, drawing on the discarded clothing lying on the floor, and
walking out the door...
Ayeka, having dozed off on the couch, is awakened by a similar
sensation on her left hand. On it rests a triangle similar
to the one on Washu's hand. The clock on the VDR* reads....
3:27 am. Her conscious mind returns to slumber, but something
else takes its place, and as she sleeps, she walks towards
the door....
Katsuhito is meditating in his shrine, contemplating
the will of the universe, when he feels warmth on his left hand.
He is, as usual, unperturbed to see the glowing triangle on his
hand. He falls asleep, as he walks to the door, yet he keeps
walking... even as the old clock on his desk reads 3:27 am...
The three of them converge on an encircled triangle etched into
the ground of one of the arboretum decks by holy fire. The
fire-- burning an unearthly blue-white-- is still flaming.
Standing at the three points inside the triangle are the three
goddesses, in full holy regalia. On either side of the circle,
facing inward, sits Tsunami and Sasami, dressed in priestess
garb and face paint and beating solemnly on ceremonial drums.
Approaching from the other direction is the first Kiyone.
As the four take up their places at four "corners" of the
circle, Tsunami floats around to each of them, quickly removing
their clothing. Murasaki is right behind her, redressing
each of them in Juraian ceremonial robes. Tokimi is last,
applying the ceremonial paint to each one's cheeks.
The preparations complete, the ceremony begins. Still in their
trance, Kiyone, Washu, Ayeka, and Katsuhito begin to dance
around the circle of flame, chanting in what sounds like Old
High Juraian. Tsunami and Sasami begin to pound harder on their
drums, also chanting in Old High Juraian. And at the points
of the triangle, the goddesses begin to speak.
"O fire which burns hotter than any star, o water that is deeper
than any ocean, o wind that blows stronger than any hurricane,
we ask for thy favor. We ask for thy knight. We ask for the
Light Hawk. It is only he who can triumph against what is ahead.
We ask for thy champion. We ask for the Light Hawk."
As Murasaki chants, an image forms above the bonfire in the
center of the triangle: Tenchi, in his warrior raiments.
As Murasaki repeats the chant over and over, the combat garb
changes into the kind that Tenchi wears when using the Light
Hawk Wings, and then suddenly shifting as wings of light, fanned
out, sprout from his back and appear in front of him...
When the four dancers awaken in the morning, they have no
recollection of the previous evening's events.
* * *
About 36 hours later, a small attack sub pulls up to a deserted
dock on the outskirts of the San Francisco harbor. It surfaces,
and the topside hatch opens. Three women climb out, followed
by a man. "Now be sure to keep ahold of that transmitter
I gave you, Kiyone. It'll be easier for us to get in touch with
that."
"I will," promises Kiyone.
Kyoto smiles and steps aside to let Tenchi climb out of the sub.
After a few minutes of hugging and kissing his wives, he climbs
back into the sub, shaking visibly. The three women gather up
their luggage and ten minutes later are in a taxi making for the
downtown area.
"So, where's the first place on our itinerary, Wa-- I mean
Wendy?" asks Kiyone.
Digital Washu frowns down at the notepad in her lap. In addition
to the three women adopting American-sounding names, she has
actually made her hair look more normal-- straightening
it out and dying it mahogany brown. "Hmmm..... first we need to
get ourselves some place to stay. And since we can afford the
best...." She taps the driver on the shoulder. "Excuse me, but
what's the best hotel in the city?"
"The Hilton, ma'am," answers the driver politely. "Y' want me t'
take y'all there?"
"Wendy" nods. "If you would please."
Ten minutes later, the taxi driver has deposited his fares off
at the Hilton, and has an extra $100 bill in his shirt pocket
for his trouble.
In the hotel lobby....
"And your name is..." asks the clerk.
"Karyn, Karyn McKenzie." She smiles. "I'm Chinese, but I married
an Scottish-American."
"Very good, Mrs. McKenzie." The clerk jots the information
down. "And you and your friends want one of our penthouse
suites for.... how long?"
"Um.... two nights will be plenty."
"Very well, then." The clerk hands a key to "Karyn." "Room 1305,
on the top floor. Enjoy."
During the elevator ride up, the two Kiyones relax against
the wall, heaving sighs of relief. "Thank god that's over,"
says the first one.
"Amen to that," echoes Yoni.
Once they reach their room....
"Sugoi*!" cry out both Kiyones at once, jumping into the air and
cheering happily.
"What's the big deal?" inquires Digital Washu. "You're the
Empresses of Jurai; your normal conditions are much more plush
than this."
"Washu," reminds Kiyone-yoni, "for the past few weeks we've been
on the run and hiding. Chisako and the houses are very
comfortable, yes, but we've been going stir crazy. This is a
welcome break."
"There's only one thing that can make this better," remarks
Yoni.
"We can talk about Tenchi later," replies Digital Washu. "Right
now, I need a bath!"
"You need a bath?" echoes the first Kiyone in disbelief.
"Yes, my skin is as natural as yours. I need to bathe each night
like a normal human to stay clean!"
"There's a giant bath tub in the bathroom," suggests Yoni.
"And there's a fresh bottle of champagne on ice here too!" adds
Kiyone-yoni.
"Are you thinking what I'm thinking?"
"Uh-huh!"
The two Kiyones giggle devilishly at the same time.
(Digital Washu sweatdrops.)
Soon, the three ladies are in the bath; the tub is piled high
with warm bubbly water. The two Kiyones have their hair wrapped
in towels and glasses of champagne hanging loosely in their
hands. Both of them look like they're drunk and loving it.
Digital Washu has the bottle. "More wine!" she cries out
drunkenly.
She then passes out and sinks to the bottom of the tub, leaving
a trail of bubbles floating to the surface.
The two Kiyones, who are not as drunk as they looked, dredge
Digital Washu out. Yoni then wraps her in a robe and sets her on
the toilet while Kiyone-yoni goes and retrieves the second
Washu's purse.
"What're you looking for?" asks Yoni.
"The instruction manual," replies Kiyone-yoni. "It's gotta be
here.... ah, there it is." She fishes out a flimsy, cheaply
printed manual. "Now, let's see.... ah, here we go. 'In case of
drunkenness, flip up rear neck panel and enter reset code
alpha-omega-Hakubi- three'."
"Entering code.... it's in," calls back Yoni.
She backs away as a soft whirring sound emanates from Digital
Washu. Her eyes suddenly fly open, blink several times, and then
reset to normality as the system resumes normal function.
"Ahh. Thank you! I feel much better now!"
"We're glad," responds Kiyone-yoni dryly. "Digital Washu, you
never told us that you could get drunk!"
"I'm as susceptible to the effects of alcohol as you," the
robotic scientist replies. "Now, I believe you two said that
there was just one more thing that could make this arrangement
better?"
"Yes," they say as one. "Tenchi."
"Well.... why don't you two get ready?"
Ten minutes later, Tenchi, who had been in the middle of a bath,
appears naked in the middle of the hotel room. Understandably
surprised, he quickly starts trying to cover himself....
until he notices his two wives, stretched out on their bed in
skimpy nightclothes, smiling hungrily at him.
Digital Washu excuses herself. "When you're ready to send him
back, let me know. I'll be down in the bar."
* * *
The next morning finds Tenchi back aboard Chisako, with a very
sore back.
Mirei looks concernedly at him as he rubs the small of his back.
"Are you okay, Daddy?"
He smiles and ruffles her hair. "Yeah, Rei-cha'ya, my back is
just sore."
"You were naughty with the mommies last night, weren't you!"
Mirei has a smug expression on her face.
"How could I be, they're not here."
"Digital Washu beamed you there and then you were naughty and
then she sent you back! That's how!"
Tenchi blushes. "Rei-cha'ya, how would you know?"
"I was in the women's bath at the time, you know, there's a
little monitor in there that lets us see what you're doing in
the normal one."
Tenchi blushes even redder. "Rei-cha'ya, what were you doing
watching me?"
"I heard your voice, I wondered if you were in the bath so I
went to take a look. Right when I turned on the monitor you
vanished from the tub!" she smiles. "Were you being naughty
with yourself before she beamed you over?!"
"Rei-cha'ya, you shouldn't ask your parents such questions!"
"You were, you were! You were being naughty with yourself,
you were being naughty with yourself!"
"You could have been naughty with me, Daddy!" interjects
Tokimi, coming up behind her father and hugging him around the
waist. "I would've let you."
"Kimi-cha'ya, cut that out!" chides Tenchi gently. "I'm your
father."
"So, I'm not a virgin anymore."
Mirei looks shocked. "Huh?!"
Tenchi starts rubbing his forehead, wishing for aspirin. "She
had sex with Kyo."
Mirei looks towards Tokimi with a hurt expression on her face.
"Tokimi, why'd you do that?! You're only supposed to have sex
with the man you're going to marry! And then you should at least
try and wait until after the wedding!"
Tokimi pouts. "But onee-chan*, it's so much fun!"
Mirei's face shifts to a stern expression and she immediately
starts lecturing Tokimi on the irresponsibility of her actions.
Still rubbing his back, Tenchi reaches for a small vial of
painkillers. "I knew I should have just stayed in bed."
Ryoko walks into the living room. "Come on, we've got a saucer
to move!" She grins as she sees Tenchi swallowing a couple of
the painkillers. "Tenchi, you really should know better than to
do something like that before moving heavy objects!"
"Leave me alone, Ryoko!" snaps Tenchi. "Ungh.... this is still
gonna hurt for a while."
Ryoko shakes her head. "Come on, lover boy, let's move that
saucer."
Several hours later, everyone save for Tenchi and Kyoto's
daughters are outside in heavy lifting gear. Kyoto is floating
inside the bent connection strut, arming the four explosive
bolts that will free the connection to the saucer from the rest
of Chisako.
"Okay, people, I'm gonna blow the bolts in 20 seconds, back away
fast!"
"Roger that," replies Tenchi's voice. "Blow 'em!"
"I'll pretend I didn't hear that, Tenchi."
Kyoto gives the detonator a fierce twist and teleports out of
the tube.
Five seconds later, the entire connection strut comes crashing
down to the ocean floor. Kyoto reappears outside of it and
shakes his head at the damage. "My poor baby... Daddy's gonna
make it all better."
"Dad!" screams Kyo.
"Calm down, Kyo," chides Ryoko. "Chisako is as much your
father's child as you are."
"Yeah," says Mirei in a teasing voice, "just like my Mommies
are as much Daddy's little girls as I am!" "Rei-cha'ya..."
warns Tenchi.
"Yes, Daddy?!" Mirei's voice takes on the "I'm so adorable
you can't get mad at me!" quality that her sisters and mother
have long since perfected.
Tenchi sighs theatrically. "Never mind. You wouldn't stop
teasing me if I paid you to, would you?"
"Of course not!" Mirei responds. "You're naughty!" She pauses
for a moment. "Grandma Washu, I have lunch ready."
"Okay!" says Washu. You guys stand by. Kyoto and I will start
repairing this right now! Shift back inside at four-hour
intervals. Kyoto, pass me that heavy-duty macrospanner."
Meanwhile, back in San Francisco....
".... how much rice?!" The wholesale grocer's eyes are bugging
out of his head. "You said you want eight hundred fifty pounds
of rice?!"
Karyn McKenzie (a.k.a. Kiyone Masaki #1) smiles politely.
"Yes, sir. We have a large family, and we sort of adopted a
taste for it when my husband was posted in the Pacific Rim."
"Your husband was a soldier? So was I." The shopkeeper's
face softens. "I know just what it was like, fighting those
damned Japs."
Kiyone-yoni keeps the smile on her face with an effort. "Err....
yes." She opens her purse expectantly. "How much will this cost
me?"
"That's about $.75 per pound.... normally, about $640....but
since you're the wife of a fellow vet, I'll let you have it for
five hundred."
The first Kiyone lets her smile widen, with only a little
effort. "Really? Thank you!" She counts off five $100 bills and
places them on the counter. "We'll bring our truck around back;
do you have anyone who could help us load them up?"
"Of course, ma'am."
Fifteen minutes later, the large truck is rolling toward the
warehouse district, where "Wendy" had rented a warehouse
to store the supplies until they're ready to return home.
"Now which turn is it again?" asks Yoni, sitting behind the
wheel.
"The next right up here.... there you go. Just keep going
straight, and we'll stop right in--what the hell?!"
Parked in front of the warehouse is a sleek Packard, with a
couple of brawny-looking guys in suits lounging against it.
"Great, the local tough guys," grumbles Kiyone-yoni. She starts
to edge her laser pistol* out of her purse. "If you two can
distract them--"
"Let's see what they want first," suggests Digital Washu.
The three women disembark form their vehicle and wander over to
the Packard. "Can we help you, gentlemen?" asks Yoni in an
impatient voice. Her arms are crossed, and her right hand is
resting inside her jacket, on the butt of her pistol.
"Yeah," says the larger of the two. "Y'see, our boss, see, owns
dis here warehouse, see? An', ahh, you ain't paid us fer usin'
it, see."
"We've already paid for it," Kiyone-yoni replies in a cold
voice.
"Yeah, but'cha need t' pay us extra, fer protection an' stuff."
"We're not exactly rolling in money," lies Yoni.
"Yeah, well, there're.... other ways t' pay, see." The large
man grins, his eyes flicking up and down Yoni's body.
Yoni takes note of this and glares at him. "I'm a married woman.
We all are. And even if we weren't--"
"So whatcha doin' in th' city wit'out yo' husbands?"
"We're buying food," explains Kiyone-yoni testily. "And this
harassment of yours is the most--"
The shorter man--swarthy and suave, as opposed to the larger
man's considerably less so aura--immediately steps in. "Calm
down, ladies. My associate here--" he nudges the taller man in
the ribs; apparently the smaller man is in charge "--wasn't
meaning that at all. Our employer, he has a nightclub downtown,
nothing fancy, but nothing disrespectful, either. The
entertainment is usually some attractive ladies like yourselves,
on the stage singing in evening gowns, but the last girl just
up and married, and moved clear to the East Coast. My colleague
was merely noting that you two might be what we're looking
for."
"And what about me? Am I just chopped liver?" snaps Digital
Washu.
The shorter man smiles placatingly at her. "Not at all. What are
your talents, ma'am?"
"Bartender!" she replies brightly, earning looks of shock from
the two Kiyones. "I can make the most potent drinks you've ever
had!"
The smaller man nods. "All right." His gaze shifts back to the
two Kiyones. "Really, ladies, this would be the most sensible
solution."
Kiyone-yoni thinks it over, after a brief mental conference
with Yoni. "You're sure that your employer won't expect
any...special services?"
Another reassuring smile. "I give you my personal assurances."
The three women raise skeptical eyebrows, but acquiesce
nonetheless. "All right," replies Kiyone-yoni. "What's the
address?"
* * * * *
"All right.... just bring that last support spar down a
bit....that's good...." Washu sends a "hold it" signal to Kyoto
and starts welding. "Tenchi, Nobuyuki, start welding on your
end." She nods in approval as her husband and stepson power up
their plasma torches and set to work on the spar's far end.
"This is the last one, people. As soon as the welding is done,
Kyoto can set the holding bolts into place, and we'll be done."
"Just in time!" reports Ryoko over the radio. "Mirei and Momoko
are almost done cooking dinner."
"Sounds good!" comments Nobuyuki. "What is it?"
"I...." Ryoko hesitates, then plunges forward. "I hope you guys
like apple pie."
"Again? But we've had that for dinner the past three nights
in a row!"
"Don't complain, Dad," warns Tenchi. "I'm sure they worked very
hard on it, and it'll hurt their feelings if you don't--"
"Actually, Tenchi, they just took the leftovers and mixed them
together."
"...."
After a moment, Tenchi says in a small voice, "Well, it's better
than starving!"
"I'm starting to wonder," retorts Nobuyuki, shutting off his
plasma torch. "Washu, we're done here."
"Good work! Come on in!"
* * * * *
Kiyone-yoni sips her drink and takes a look at her surroundings.
"Well, girls, what do you think?"
Yoni wears a look of appraisal. "Not too bad.... really, I was
expecting far worse."
And indeed, the club is in fairly decent shape. The decor is
plush, if not quite tasteful or well lit, but at least it
appears to be a fairly respectable club.
"Ah, there you ladies are!" Their sponsor--the swarthy man who
they've learned is named Louie--comes up to them. Following
behind is an overweight man in an expensive suit. He is
red-faced, as if the act of walking is an incredible exertion
on him.
"Ladies, this is Mr. Carter, my boss."
Mr. Carter smiles what he apparently thinks is a charming
smile. The three women have to struggle to keep the smiles on
their faces. "Welcome to the Moonlight Kiss, ladies." His eyes
flick up and down the two Kiyones' bodies, and his smile widens
into a leer. "I see you're as beautiful as Louie here had told
me."
Louie clears his throat diffidently. "Err, boss, I told you.
They're all married."
"Pity.... oh, well. If you can sing, that'll be enough." He
raises an eyebrow. "I trust that you can..."
The two Kiyones step onto the stage and pick up the mikes. "Is
there any particular song you want to hear?" asks Yoni.
"Hmmm...." Mr. Carter takes a moment to think. "How about 'Night
and Day'?"
Fortunately, the two Kiyones know that song; they and Tenchi
have danced to Kyoto's old big band records a hundred times
over, and Kyoto had insisted that they learn enough about this
era's music to pass as regular citizens. They sing the old Cole
Porter tune flawlessly.
Louie is the first to start applauding, followed momentarily
by everyone else in the club. Mr. Carter smiles in approval.
"Yes, you two will do just fine." He snaps his fingers, and a
matronly woman appears. "Mary, show them to their dressing
room."
"What about me?" demands Digital Washu.
"Charlie, show their companion around the bar."
"Yessir, Mr. Carter." Charlie, a husky man with an air of
friendliness, takes Digital Washu back behind the bar with him.
Later that evening, the three girls compare notes in the small
apartment that Louie helped them find.
"How long are we gonna do this?" asks Yoni.
"For a while," answers Kiyone-yoni firmly. "We're not half
finished gathering the food we need, and we need that
warehouse."
"But can you trust that Carter guy to keep his libido in check?"
Digital Washu asks pointedly.
"I don't trust him," the first Kiyone replies. "I do, however,
trust Louie and Charlie, to an extent. They've been straight
with us so far, and I think they'll continue to do so--at least
until we leave."
"Should we tell Tenchi-yon about this change in plans?" asks
Yoni.
The first Kiyone sighs. "Yeah, I think we should...."
* * *
".... Well...." Tenchi's voice is laced with concern, as it
always is when a loved one is out of safe reach. "...As long as
you guys are safe..."
"Don't worry, Tenchi-yon, if the guy tries anything, I'll have
Yoni beat him up." Kiyone-yoni smiles as she hears her husband's
dry chuckle.
"Alright, then. Anything else?"
"Yeah, um.... we're gonna be tied up with Mr. Carter for a
while, so we're gonna need to change the plans. Could you and
some of the others come into town and pick up the rest of the
supplies?"
"Sure, sweetie. I'd be glad to help. Could you put Yoni on?"
"Okay... don't spend too much time talking to her, I'll get
lonely."
Tenchi chuckles again. "Alright. Love you, Kiyone-yoni."
"Love you too, Daddy. Here comes your other little girl."
There's a rustle on the other end of the line and Yoni's voice
speaks. "Hi, daddy! Do ya miss us?!" "More than you can imagine,
Yoni. The other Kiyone tells me things are a little weird over
there right now."
"Uh-huh, there's this nasty fat guy that keeps leering at us,
Mr. Carter, and every time he does I just feel dirty all over."
"Oh, poor baby... I wish I could be there with both of you right
now."
"I wish you could too, Daddy. Our bed's real lonely without
you between us."
Tenchi gulps. "Y-y-y-yoni...."
"Yes, Daddy... I ache without you inside of me..."
A new voice replaces Tenchi's. "Naughty!" giggles Mirei's voice.
"How are you, Mommies?"
Yoni laughs happily. "Hi, Rei-cha'ya! We're just fine. Are you
taking good care of our daddy?"
"Uh-huh! He tries to be naughty with me everyday!"
"I do not!" yells Tenchi's voice in the background.
"Rei-cha'ya, tell our daddy that I know that you're not naughty
with him everyday."
Mirei giggles before relaying the message to her father. "Are
you coming home, soon?"
"Not for a little while, Rei-cha'ya." Her voice softens. "We
love you, Rei-cha'ya."
"Love you too, bye-bye now."
Mirei hands the receiver back to her father, who resumes
speaking. "All right. When do you want us there?"
"Your other little girl and I want you here now," says Yoni
cheerily. "You and the others should probably come in about a
week. We've gathered almost all the dry goods, but we haven't
gotten around to the meats and such yet."
"All right. I'll see you in two, then." Tenchi's voice softens
even more. "Give the other Kiyone my love...."
"I will," Yoni promises. "Love you, Tenchi-yon."
"I love you too, Yoni. G'night." Tenchi closes the channel
and rises from the communications station on the command deck,
stretching and yawning.
"You miss them, don't you, Daddy?" asks Mirei as she hugs
Tenchi.
Tenchi hugs Mirei back. "Very much so, Rei-cha'ya."
"Tenchi?" Nobuyuki comes onto the command deck, rubbing his
eyes. "Tenchi, what're you doing up so late? It's almost
eleven."
"Couldn't sleep," Tenchi replies. "Besides, the girls called."
"Hmm. How're they doing?"
Tenchi chuckles dryly. "Let me tell you...."
* * * * *
"....these foolish things remind me of you..." The two Kiyones
end on the same note. Even though the band holds the tune for a
few more seconds, the applause starts almost immediately.
Smiling, the two Kiyones bow. Ever since they started singing
here a week before, they've drawn steady and sizable crowds
each night-- although they're not really sure it's their singing
or their tight Chinese-style dresses that keep the men coming
back for more.
The first Kiyone takes the mike again. "We're gonna lay back
this next set and let the band take the limelight for awhile,
don't worry, we'll be back as soon as possible." They walk off
the stage and over to the bar, where Digital Washu has made them
two of her more popular cocktail creations, a tall glass of
electric-blue liquid that is bubbling most unnaturally.
Kiyone-yoni eyes it warily. "Um, Wendy, what is that?"
"It's called a Flash-Point!" chortles Digital Washu. "Try it!"
"Um.... okay." The first Kiyone picks up her glass and takes
a sip, then grins. "Sugoi!" She downs the rest of the glass.
"Another, please."
Yoni picks up her glass and takes a tentative sip. Her
subsequent reaction is a mirror of the original Kiyone's.
Mr. Carter, a wide (and what he thinks an ingratiating)
smile on his face, strides up to the bar. "Ladies...."
"Oh, Mr. Carter!" Digital Washu pushes a third glass of the
frothy blue liquid at the owner. "Try some!"
"Thanks, Wendy!" His eyes wandering up and down the two Kiyones'
bodies with little subtlety, he downs the cocktail in one gulp.
He then falls to the ground, unconscious.
The three women look down at him unconcernedly. Yoni shrugs.
"I suppose we'd better get someone to take him back to his
office...."
Louie comes up. "Great job, la--" He notes his insensate
employer sprawled on the floor. "Do I even want to know what
happened here?!"
"The man can't hold his liquor," Digital Washu comments dryly.
Louie snaps his fingers. "Mikey, get over here and help me haul
the boss back to his office."
The hulking man stumbles over. "Jeez, Louie, wha' happened
t' th' boss?"
"Like the lady said, he can't hold his liquor. C'mon."
* * * * * *
"You guys ready to go?" asks Washu.
Tenchi settles his sport jacket into place and takes a quick
look in the mirror. As befitting the times, he is wearing a suit
and tie of conservative cut and bland color. His hand touches
the back of his neck, where his long ponytail had been--had
been. Grimacing slightly, he turns to look at his father and
grandfather, both similarly dressed. "Whenever you are, Washu."
Washu starts punching coordinates into her hololaptop.
"I'll try to set you three down in as inconspicuous a place as
possible. Now, tell me what you'll do once you're there...."
Tenchi sighs with more than a little exasperation. "'We go and
get the rest of the food first, and then we go and get the
girls.' Was this really necessary, Washu?"
"I believe it was." Washu finishes her sequencing and lets her
right index finger hover over the initiate touchpad. "Ready?"
The three men gather nods as one.
"Right. I'll see you all in....a little while." She taps the
control, and her husband, stepson, and father-in-law-in-law
vanish.
Within six hours of their disappearance from Chisako, the three
men have collected the rest of the needed food, and have the
perishables teleported back to Chisako by Washu. They then make
their way to a small cabaret named the Moonlight Kiss, which
has in the past week enlisted an incredibly attractive pair of
twins for vocal services....
Yoni has just emerged from the back rooms, to bring herself
and the other Kiyone some cold drinks when she sees who has just
walked through the door. Forgetting the drinks, she rushes into
the back.
Digital Washu waves the not-strangers over to the bar. "Hey,
we were beginning to wonder if you'd ever show up!"
"Really?" comments Tenchi dryly.
"Well, you I expected, but alone."
"Why?"
Just then the lights dim, except for a spotlight that focuses
on the stage.
A swarthy man in a white linen suit steps up and takes the mike.
"Ladies and gents, we of the Moonlight Kiss are proud to present
to you our latest pair of chanteuses, Karyn and Kimberly
McKenzie!"
The crowd stands as one and starts applauding.
Tenchi's eyes go wide as solar orbits as his two wives, dressed
in tightly wrapped chong-sams with thigh-high slits up each
side, walk onto the stage. Some of the less propriety-restrained
males in the audience start wolf whistling, and Tenchi's hand
twitches, as if preparing to go for his sword.
Kiyone-yoni smiles at the audience. "Good evening." Her smile
goes even wider, and slightly feline, as her eyes meet Tenchi's.
"Our first number is dedicated to someone in the audience
who's very special to my sister and I."
Tenchi gulps, trying to ignore the lightheadedness
that threatens to overtake him.
Nobuyuki nudges his son. "Control yourself, son...."
A look is exchanged between the two Kiyones, and they begin to
sing*:
How glad the many millions,
Of Toms and Dicks and Williams,
Would be, to capture me....
But you were so persistent,
You wore down my resistance,
I fell, and it was swell....
You're my big and brave and handsome Romeo,
How I won you, I will never ever know,
It's not that you're attractive, but oh my heart grows active,
When you come into view....
Tenchi is by now sweating like mad. He has long since given up
fighting off the pleasant lightheadedness, and Nobuyuki is
trying to keep him upright. He smirks. "This song always did
have that effect on him...."
I've got a crush on you, sweetie pie,
All the day and night time, hear me sigh,
I never had the least notion that I could fall with so much
emotion....
Would you coo, would you care?
For a cunning cottage we could share?
The world will pardon my mush
'Cause I've got a crush, my baby, on you....
The two Kiyones have their eyes fixed directly on Tenchi's,
and Nobuyuki and Katsuhito are both having to hold the young
man upright (and, simultaneously, hold him down).
Would you coo, would you care?
For a cunning cottage we could share?
The world will pardon my mush
'Cause I have got a crush, my baby, on you....
Tenchi is on his feet with the rest of the crowd, cheering
and clapping. Nobuyuki and Katsuhito exchange exasperated
glances and pull him back into his chair.
The rest of their set is slightly more subdued, but the guys in
the audience are still on the edges of their seats--and
drooling. Finally, the two chanteuses take a break and wander
over to the bar. Tenchi is out of his seat in a heartbeat
and sidling up between them. "Ladies, may I buy you a drink?"
They smile brightly at him, and Kiyone-yoni nods. "We'd be
delighted." She then reaches her arms up around Tenchi's neck
and brings his face down to hers, locking her lips to his.
"Mmm....been too long."
"Yes, it has," agrees Tenchi in a husky voice.
"What about me?" mock-pouts Yoni.
Tenchi grins at her. "C'mere, you." And he gives her as
passionate a kiss as the first Kiyone.
Finally, after reassuring both his wives just how much he's
missed them, he comes up for air. "You girls ready to go?"
The two Kiyones nod as one. "We are.... but we have to finish
tonight's performance first," answers Kiyone-yoni.
"By the way," asks Yoni excitedly, what did you think of our
performance, Daddy?"
Tenchi hugs both Kiyones. "Wonderful. You two could get a record
deal, I'm sure of it."
Charlie pours Tenchi, Nobuyuki, and Katsuhito a double of
scotch-- "On the house," he says. "Your wives are good girls."
Tenchi thanks him and sips his drink.
Louie comes up to the bar and is introduced around. "So, are you
gonna be taking these two home, now?"
Tenchi nods. "Yep. We have everything we came for."
Louie looks around; for once, his self-assured demeanor seems
to be slipping. "Hmm....get out. Now."
"Huh?!?!?"
"He's right," agrees Charlie, now also looking around. "Mr.
Carter's making more money with you two singing than he ever did
with any other act. He won't let you go."
"I thought the deal was we sang as long as we rented the
warehouse," argues the first Kiyone.
"Deals don't mean much to him," retorts Louie. "I've seen plenty
of times where.... but never mind about that. Do you girls have
everything you need?"
"We need to stop by the warehouse really fast...."
"Then get going. We can stall him, but not for long."
The Kiyones hesitate, then nod. They kiss both men on the cheek
and head for the door. Digital Washu does likewise, and Tenchi
shakes their hands.
Forty-five minutes later, a large truck rumbles to a stop at
Pier #45, in a long-deserted section of the shipping district.
Tenchi flashes the truck's highbeams three times for ten
seconds, and the sub surfaces. Kyoto climbs out of the topside
hatch, a captain's hat perched atop his head at a jaunty angle.
"Ahoy, landlubbers!"
"Shut up and help us unload this food," snorts Tenchi.
"All right, all right...." The food is promptly offloaded.
Ryoko, who had come along for the ride, smiles in approval.
"Mmm. The girls will be happy to see something other than
fruit!" She licks her lips. "Tonight, I think we'll make....
Stir-fry! Yes, tonight is stir fry night!"
"Sounds good," agrees Yoni. "Too bad we won't be there for it."
Ryoko looks confused. "Of course you will.... that's why we're
here to pick you up, isn't it?"
Tenchi shakes his head. "Sorry. We've got a nuke to get,
remember?"
"Well, not before you have some real food. Come on down, we can
make some in the sub's galley."
After enjoying a meal of real food (and after Ryoko has finished
playfully needling the two Kiyones about having been able to
gorge themselves on real food for the past week), Tenchi and
company pile back into the truck. He had tried to talk his wives
out of going, but to no avail. Only Nobuyuki and Digital Washu
will be returning on the sub. "Don't forget to signal us when
you're ready for a pick-up!" she instructs.
"All right," calls back Tenchi, waving as the submarine sinks
beneath the waves. He then turns around--and finds both Kiyones
snuggled up on either side. A wide grin appears on his face.
Kyoto groans. "All right, in the back, you three. Don't get too
comfortable, though. Soon as possible, we'll be trading the
truck in for something else."
And so they set off on their next errand.
The End
Footnotes:
*Video Disc Recorder.
*Sugoi: "Wow!" Your basic positive exclamation.
*Onee-chan: Literally "dearest older sister," but basically
"big sister."
* Yes, I know that she turned her piece in when she retired
from the GP. But I think it likely that she would have at least
one under a private license, for home defense.
* "I've Got a Crush on You." Written, I believe (I'm not sure),
by George and Ira Gershwin. The version used here is identical
to the one on Linda Ronstadt's 'Round Midnight compilation
of songs from the big band era.
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