Carrot Glace, the artist formerly known as Catbert25.
"Ohh, shit! Someone else is out of Alcahol!" -Fujisawa Sensei.
"It's a wonderful warm fuzzy feeling in the pit of my stomach, like I've
had too much beer or something." -Phil
The Three Magic Knights.
Part 1: The Teaser!
Cephiro, land of my worst fantasies.
[This is a parody and not a dark fic, read on my friends...]
[[Prologue, you can scroll down past these to the fic if you want to.]]
This is the fic I am replacing The Manga with temporarily, why? Because
it's a great idea that won't leave me alone. All the time I see fanfics
and SI where the characters are happy to be there and really get into the
adventure. Well, I started to wonder what would happen if somebody got
pulled into an Anime that they hate? Interesting concept ne? What would
happen if a slightly psychotic guy who likes the Slayers and Record of
Lodoss War got pulled into a girly anime like Magic Knight Rayearth as
the fourth Magic Knight? Let's find out...]]
Dan smiled as he sat in front of his computer and read his E-mail, he
had a short-lived frown on his face as he read through the messages. He
ran a hand through his short brown hair and leaned on his elbow as he
lazily pressed on the down arrow on the keyboard. A small sigh escaped
his lips as he shut down the computer not really feeling like reading at
the moment. "Man this sucks, all that was posted was a few crummy self
insertions by some newbie authors. This bites." He leaned back in his
chair and took a long gulp of his long since warm soda.
Behind him a small chuckle emerged from the darkness, "Well, what can
you do, we all have to start somewhere." The voice was low, but not
rumbling or threatening.
"Yea, yea, so Carrot-san, what are you going to do tonight?" the boy
smiled and turned to his roommate. Carrot turned on the television and
was bathed in the dark white light as he relaxed on the worn couch, he
was a slim man of about twenty years old with wild brown hair. His
clothes where old, a dirty looking T-shirt with a picture of Eric Cartman
on the front of it. The man smiled to himself and looked thoughtful. "No
money, I'll probably stay up and watch Jay Lenno's monologue and go to
bed, or perhaps I'll write some fanfiction before I turn in."
"Yea, you do that." Dan was still angry with the boy over the waffy
ending to the Teacher. "Ya sappy jerk."
"I heard that," snorted Carrot as he tossed his drink into a nearby
trash can, it fell on the floor anyway because the bin had not been
emptied for several weeks.
"Yea, yea, look pal I'm going to sleep so keep that crap down," Dan
stood up with an angry look on his face and stormed towards his bedroom.
Carrot frowned, "that crap" his friend was referring to was Magic Knight
Rayearth, Carrot had bought it on a whim and was about half way through
the series now. He didn't like it much, but it was paid for so he
tolerated it. Dan was a different story, he absolutely despised it,
especially the dub. The slightly peeved fanfic writer sat down at the
computer and plugged it into the wall. "Let's see how evil I can be," he
put in a very special disk he had acquired through an old friend and
smiled. "Good bye Dan, have a nice trip," pointedly ignoring the glowing
light emitting from the other man's bedroom he started to type with a
wicked grin on his face, after a moment he sat back and relaxed as the
words formed on the screen by themselves. "It's your story buddy, I've
got you started, let's see how it plays out; just don't get yourself
killed all right?" his laughter echoed through the apartment, until the
old lady from across the hall started beating on his door with her broom
and screaming for his silence. After that he just chuckled to himself as
he read while glancing towards the door in annoyance on occasion. "I
ought to write something for her one day, maybe a La Blue girl and old
lady from across the hall cross over fic..."
Dan cursed as he found himself in the middle of Tokyo tower, he was
tired and cranky. "What the hell? I haven't even made it to the bed yet!"
He glanced around and frowned as he realized where he was, all around him
everyone was speaking Japanese and he understood them perfectly, that
could only mean one thing. "Damn you Carrot! Wait until I get back!" He
raised his hands into the air and snarled at the ceiling angrily while
ignoring the strange looks he was getting. He looked at himself and
noticed he was wearing a schoolboy's uniform, he was also about sixteen
years old.
Quickly strapping on a large traveling pack with a bamboo umbrella on it
for comedic effect he walked up to a young blue haired girl and tapped
her on the shoulder. "Excuse me, could you tell me where I am?"
The girl turned and stared at him as if he where an idiot, until she
noticed his pack and seemed to dismiss the matter for some reason. "Tokyo
tower, everyone knows where that is! You had to pay to get in"
"No wonder I had to pay to get in! I thought it was a toll booth!" The
boy looked distraught for a moment and hung his head, "Then this isn't
Paris?"
Once again he received many strange looks. "Uhh, no."
A thought occurred to him as his pack seemed to vanish into the same
place he pulled it from. "Do I have any money?" quickly, using over
dramatic hand movements he pulled his wallet from the back of his pants
and gasped as he looked into it. "Woohoo! Fifty thousand yen?! He's never
written me into a fic with this much money before! I'm gonna have me a
good time now!" the boy started for the elevator when a young red head
with a long flowing pigtail rushed into him apparently chasing after
another girl. The folded leather wallet fell to the ground and opened
dramatically.
"Oh! I'm sorry!" exclaimed the girl innocently as she bent down and
tried to pick it up at the same time as him, which of course would have
slammed their heads into one another if they hadn't looked up at that
precise moment. The ended up in an innocent accidental kiss which caused
him to blush much more than he should have considering some of the things
he'd done with his ex-girlfriend.
The young girl backed away in shock still holding his wallet apologizing
incoherently, he simply wiped his mouth with his arm and looked
disinterested. "Yea yea, can I have my wallet now?" he held out his hand
and brushed his over fluffed anime bangs out of his eyes without
realizing that his face was covered in magical looking sparkles with a
fuzzy outline.
The girl nodded and handed it to him before running off after the other
girl looking incredibly embarassed, Dan frowned as he glanced around and
followed the girl with his eyes, she was running towards a girl with long
blue hair and another young girl in glasses. "Oh, he wouldn't dare," he
muttered under his breath while slowly walking towards the girls. Finally
getting near them he stopped the red head just as she came in contact
with the others. "Excuse me, but what's your name?"
The girl gave him a small smile and turned completely red, "I'm Hi-" she
was promptly cut off as the four of them where bathed in a white light
and suddenly falling through the sky.
"CAAAARRRRROOOOTTTT! IIIII'LLLL KIIIIILLLLL YOOOOUUUU!!!" he cried as he
fell towards the land of Cephiro with a vicious snarl on his lips. The
last thought that ran through his head before he landed on the scaly
surface of a giant flying fish was the fact that he'd probably never get
the chance to spend that fifty-thousand yen.
TBC...
[Warning! Continuation of this fic depends on feed back!] C&C to
Carrotglace@juno.com
Or hit that button marked [Reply] on your mail server.
The evil that is Catbert will never truly die, I'm just hoping a little
bit of perversion will help water it down a little.
First off, yes the title is a parody of the Three Musketeers; there are
four of them in the book after all. I'd also like to say that yes Dan
will get pretty powerful pretty fast, and he'll probably be the strongest
of the Magic Knights.
However, I want to point out that this is part of the joke, as is
Hikaru's initial infatuation with him. Dan -does not want to be there-
and will do about anything to get home, including taking any short cuts
he can and attempting to bump off the girls himself. All he really knows
is that the fic has to be finished before he can return home, whether or
not it ends up a Dark fic or not doesn't concern him. I'll also point out
that he -has no prior knowledge of the show- beyond the first tape.
Be aware of one other thing, he is not stupid and would not openly
oppose the mission, because he is aware that if he becomes a villain
he'll probably have a harder time defeating them; and can possibly get
himself killed, that's the way these things work after all.
Of course Carrot is aware of this, so he added an extra safety
precaution, just what it is and how it will effect Dan will remain a
mystery for now.
Find out next time!