Here goes some C&C (with MST and in Spamfic mood :) )

Arrgh.  Forwarding it added bad formatting thingies to the text.  Gomen,
gomen, gomen.  It's MY turn to have a bad formatting day.  THIS time it's
RIGHT.

Don't worry. It happens sometimes :)

        If there was a person in Japan who was as big a weirdness magnet
as Ranma Saotome, that person was Naru Osaka.  Unlike Ranma, however,
who attracted paranormally powerful martial artists, bizarre curses,
wandering amazons, confused ghosts, dim witted demons, and the
occasional small shriveled up pervert, all Naru ever seemed to
attract was monsters.

That means the insurance companies hate her :)

        She was very very good at that, though.

All the more reason :))))

<snip>

        Most people didn't understand what Naru saw in Umino.  They
looked at the surface and saw a geek.

What? He isn't?

        Well, fair enough.  He WAS something of a geek.  But he was a
geek who was loyal, affectionate, brave, unfaltering, and-- the last
two factors being Naru's personal secret-- had the most gorgeous eyes
under those coke-bottle glasses and was a fantastic kisser.

Here comes the Theory of Relativity ^_^

        Naru allowed herself a small smile at that thought.  She wondered
what Usagi would think about Umino-kun if she knew THAT part.  But
although they were the best of friends, there were some things she
was NOT planning to share with Usagi.  Like eyes and lips.

Then we can cross Naru as a potential lesbian :)))
(really, it looks like she doesn't want to share HER lips and eyes with
Usagi.)

        Idly she wondered what Usagi was doing right now.

        Idle wondering was interrupted by something that seemed... odd.
Even for Juuban.

Maybe she is related to the Hibikis and is actually in Nerima :)

        "Come back here, you baka monster!"

        Naru had seen monsters before.  None quite as odd looking as this
one, though.

        It seemed to be female-- they nearly always were, for some
reason-- and made entirely out of Lego blocks.  It was also, contrary
to what monsters usually did, running for its semi-life.

Why don't you just say 'running for its half-life' ? Oh, I forgot. It belongs to Valve (tm).

        It was supposed to be simple.  There had been nobody anywhere
around.  Just the target, a person of great focus.  Send the
Ur-demon, seek the soul, find out if the StarGem was there, kill the
target if it wasn't-- didn't do to leave lose ends, after all-- and
go to the next.

loose ends.

        Of COURSE that Paragon bitch had popped in out of nowhere,
spouting something about judgment and being wanting and all that.  As
bad as a Senshi, she was.

Be careful with your language! You want this to be X-rated ? ( :) )

        Well, Legolette had been crafted for just such a thing.  She
could reform herself into almost any weapon she could envision.  So,
it should have been simple.

Murphy's Law ?

        Ferriko groaned.  SHOULD have been.  But no, the Paragon was so
damn fast that Legolette couldn't get a chance to form a weapon,
except once. And then she hit, not a Paragon, but a telephone pole.
The telephone pole had almost hit some girl with really strange hair,
and Paragon went berserk.  Who KNEW that such a tiny girl as the
Paragon could pick up and wield a damn telephone pole?

God?

        Who knew she WOULD?

Fate?

        The Master was NOT going to be happy.  Things were going not at
all as planned...

When does it?

        "MONSTER NO BAKA!"

Wow! Here comes Akane, the mack truck! Hey!!! Oh... It's not her... you
are no fun. <pout> ( :) )

        WHAM!

        (I guess that's her, and-- WHOA.)

        "My GOD.  She's a monster herself!  NO-ONE can be THAT strong!"
exclaimed a girl in a stylized green and pink seifuku.

        The Sailor Senshi had arrived on the scene.  And Jupiter was
freaking.

Considering she's a sort of freak herself :) (really, how many magical girls are
there in the world? no offense)

        Of course, a short girl in a skimpy costume waving a telephone
pole around and trying to beat the hell out of a female form made out
of toy blocks is something that would freak anyone.  Sailor Moon was
willing to bet that even the normally unflappable Sailor Pluto would
have reacted in the same way.

Considering that I'm plotting a Ranma/SM/Chronotrigger Fusion right now,
I agree with your assessment.

<snip>

        Meanwhile, said Paragon DID have a reason for using a telephone
pole instead of her usual martial arts and Para Volts.  She was
testing herself to find out just how strong she was.

And what best target than a punching dummy ? Ooppss... that wasn't meant
to be said :)

        As best as she could figure, right now she probably was as strong
as Akane had been under the Super-Soba and twice as good a fighter as
the Do-Gi incident.  Not too shabby.  And no unsightly whiskers
either.  Heh.

The best of two worlds without their drawbacks.

<snip>

        No, she's never use the Power of the Paragon against a human
being.  Well, except maybe Happosai.  Heck, for all she knew he was
an evil extradimensional entity himself-- it would explain a lot.

<chuckle>

        Hmm... and Pantyhose Tarou...  Have to ask Star about that...

        Well, enough indulging her muscles.  Now to finish it.

        Tossing the telephone pole up in the air, Paragon let out a Para
Volt, followed it up with a leaping kick, and finally suplexed the
Ur-demon.  Which shattered.

I love Legos. The old ones, that is. You know, when they did not have many
specialized pieces and you had to improvise. Shame on them.

<snip>

        "This we've seen before," murmured Sailor Mercury.  "Looks like
she's playing Nekoneru's game there..."  She raised her voice,
calling, "Paragon!  That thing won't stay broken-- we've fought
something like that before!"

        "Oh, goody!  You can have it, then!" replied the now dodging
Paragon.  "Damn thing's somehow doubled in speed! At least there
aren't any--"

        There was a sound of many whiny-grunty voices coming down the
street.

When will she learn?

<snip>

        "Got it!  BURNING MANDALA!"

        Hoops of elemental fire spun out at the Ur-demon, which screamed
as her body began to melt and fuse.  Paragon grinned at that.  "Hey,
that's pretty good!  You guys want to see something with hot and
cold?"

Mention the stench that burnt plastic releases. Oh, and avoid the environmentalists :)

<snip>

        Paragon had worked carefully on this one.  It had occurred to her
that her normal Ranma-mode attacks could be used if she just called
them something different and varied the delivery a tiny bit.
(Actually, it had occurred to Star.  But magical mascots are supposed
to take a back seat.)

Of course. Otherwise Luna and Artemis would have gotten all the credit :)

        "PARA IMPACT STORM!"

        Mercury, who had been monitoring Paragon as well as the creature,
gasped.  Paragon had punched it one thousand, six hundred and
thirteen times in less than five seconds, each time with a force
capable of shattering prestressed concrete.  There was a stuttering,
thundering crack as her fists shattered the sound barrier repeatedly.

        Paragon blinked.  She knew she was stronger and faster in this
form, but... Oh, MAN, Cologne would freak out...

She would. All that she needed was to look at Ranma's clothing. Or lack
thereof.

        "I think I've gone deaf," complained Venus.

        "What?  I can't hear you, I've gone deaf," replied Mars.

        "Speak up, Mars, I can't hear you," Moon added.

        "It's all right, it's just temporary, I don't think she meant to
do that," said Mercury, who could read lips a little.

        "What?" said Mars.

        While the Senshi tried to sort this problem out, Paragon left,
her job, as it were, done.  She realized that she needed to talk to
Star about this side effect.

        Well, as soon as she could hear the rabbit, anyhow...

They will need ear protectors...

<snip>

        Nabiki stormed up to Ranma, repressing the desire to frown, it
would be bad for her image after all, and assuming her patented
sardonic smirk instead.  "And where have you been all day?" she
demanded.

Here comes the merc... ahemm. Nabiki, the Ice Queen.

<snip>

        "Is that any way to talk to a friend?"  Nabiki said, grinning.

        "No.  But what does that have to do with you?  No WAY are you my
friend."

hmm...

        Nabiki's grin faded.

        "What do you mean by that?  Of course I'm your--"

        "Then why do you pull all that crap on me?"

good point.

        "I treat everyone the same, you know that, Ranma."

        "I do.  That's why I don't think you're anyone's friend.  I don't
have time for this, I'm outta here."

        Before Nabiki could protest, Ranma skipped to a nearby rooftop
and started his dash back to the Tendo residence.  She stood there,
in shock.  She didn't know what had made this new Ranma, but she knew
damn well that she didn't like it one bit.

        Because Ranma was supposed to forgive and forget like the sap
she'd always known him to be.  And for some reason, he'd stopped
being a sap.  Instead, he'd grown a spine.

        She had always, in her own way, considered herself a friend to
Ranma, and had assumed that he felt the same.  But... now she wasn't
so sure.

        For the first time she considered the possibility that Ranma
might actively dislike her.

        And she liked that even less.

That's something that I never really considered. It's a good point in both
Ranma's and Nabiki's caracterisation.

<snip>

        "We can't be sure about her at all," Rei said.  "She's not a
Senshi, so we can't be sure."

        "Her enemies are our enemies, right?  As far as I'm concerned,
it's six of one and two in the bush," Minako retorted.

        There was a pause.

        "That's six of-- oh, never mind," Artemis sighed.

<blink> I didn't get it. Could anyone explain this one to me?

        "I trust her," Usagi said.  No emphasis, no challenge, just a
calm, serene confidence.  "She is on our side-- or we're on hers.
Remember what she said-- this might be her fight?  We might be the
outsiders in this conflict?"

        Makoto cracked her knuckles.  "Hey, it's all the same to ME.  If
she's a good guy and they are bad guys, then we help the good guy.  I
want to see if I can learn some of her moves."

"Now we're talking!"

        Rei scowled, but said nothing.  To her annoyance, that argument
made perfect sense.

        "Besides, she dresses neat," added Chibi-Usa.

        "Now you do NOT go there, ninjin-atama," Usagi said.  "I won't
have it now, and I KNOW I won't have it in a thousand years.  You are
NOT dressing like her!"

        "Spoilsport."

Usagi: "Pervert."

<snip>

        But apparently the rest of Nerima hadn't agreed.

        She'd always assumed blithely-- well, perhaps not blithely, but
confidently-- that all Ranma had to do was to make a choice, or have
someone make it for him in this case, and all the other suitors and
lunatics would vanish away.

"You wish, bring a sponge." (anyone who catches this reference will
receive a prize)

<snip>

        And then, Ranma had cheered up-- but he'd also changed.  He
didn't seem to be worried about the various fiancees, or the stable
of enemies, or anything of the sort.

        It was as though he had more important things to worry about.

Fire the fireworks! Release the baloons! Akane Tendo is figuring something
out by herself!

<snip>

        Because this Ranma wasn't playing by the rules that the world had
set for him.

He shouldn't have ever played by those rules, anyway.

        ####

        "I'm sorry, Mr. Kuno, but we do not rent time on the SETI array
to private citizens."

        "Hmmmph.  Peasant."

AHAHAHAHAHAH. He's going THAT far to be with his 'osage no onna' ?
This is rich! (and silly)

<snip>

        "Please... don't remind me about Jusendo."  Ranma shuddered.
"That was the worst day of my life."

        "Oh?  I would have thought the Nyannichuan would have been in
that spot."

Touché

<snip>

        "You mean this thing is turning me into someone else?"  Ranma
stared in sudden apprehension at the amulet.

        "No... I mean it's allowing you to finally BE you-- the you you
have the potential to be, the you that your father's training in
nothing but martial arts and your mother's rather... extreme
expectations and the pressure from practically everyone you know
hasn't let you be.  You're becoming Ranma."

Interesting.

        "What if I don't like this...  Ranma?"

        "I don't think that will be a problem.  Hmm... I smell You Know
Who coming this way... want to have some fun?  I think it's your
turn."

        "Which You Know Who?"

        "The fat one."

        Ranma cracked his knuckles.  "OOOH, yeah."

<grin>

        ####

        "WHAAHAHAHAIIIE!"

        SPLASH!

        "GROWF!"

        "Honestly, old man.  You're getting lax in your training."

        Genma-panda rose from the koi pond and fumed.  How the HELL had
the boy gotten that fast?

Paragon-induced?

<snip>

        Minako and Makoto had seen him from time to time in the streets
of Azabu Juuban.  Tallish but not too tall, well built, with dark
hair in a pigtail and the most incredible blue eyes either of them
had EVER seen.  He affected Chinese garments, which only added to his
mysterious allure.  Exotic, see?

Hmm... who do I know that conforms to that description? :)

<snip>

        This wasn't actually unusual for either.  Minako had run through
many a crush in her time after Alan, and Makoto had a way of falling
in love on a regular basis.  But somehow this was different.  The Boy
was, they knew, by far a cut above the rest.

        The Boy was also not cooperating.

That's normal.

<snip>

        "No, really.  See this book about this Chinese tribe in the
Byankala range?  They use all sorts of methods to meet boys.  We can
set up a snare here, and--"

        "I'm NOT going to start setting traps to catch him!  That's
silly!  Besides, I think all that stuff is made up, anyhow.  Chinese
Amazons in a valley next to a magical martial arts training ground
and all... it's ridiculous!"

<groan>

        "Well...  it was just a thought."

        "And this stuff about marriage by combat is nuts!  By that logic
we'd have been married to all four Generals, Wiseman, Diamond,
Sapphire, AND Professor Tomoe if that applied to us!  What are you
thinking?"

I'm thinking that that argument could lead to an interesting Lemon :)
(no, I am NOT issuing a challenge)

        "I'm thinking that I want to meet the cutest boy that ever walked
the face of the earth, is what I'm thinking, Mako-chan."

        "So do I.  But I'm not going to be THIS silly to do it.  Where
did you get that book, anyhow?"

        "From that new doctor that started practice last month.  Tofu
Ono.  He's pretty cute himself, for an older man..."

        "The one with the skeleton?  That does all those meditation
exercises?"

        "Hai.  I think it has something to do with a girl."

        "Girl?"

        "Well, I heard him mention a name a few times.  Betty."

        "Pretty name..."

Yeah. But she's a tad skinny for anyone's taste.

<snip>

        "Aw, um, personal business.  Nothing important, really.  But
you?"

        Tofu frowned slightly.  "I... had to leave.     You may not beaware
of this, Ranma, but whenever I saw Kasumi, I would become a little
erratic..."

        Ranma stared at Tofu.  "I kinda noticed."

How could he not? He almost got killed when he first found out.

<snip>

        "Yeah, cured.  Big load off my mind, I can tell you."  (Or it
would be if I wasn't a magical girl who's stronger than an elephant.)

Shouldn't it be 'stronger than Ryoga' ? Not even an Elephant can take
a boulder head-on ... on second thought... maybe it can... whatever.

<snip>

        And in a voice filled with shock and amazement, Tofu stammered,
"Wh-where did YOU get the Paragon Amulet?"

        (HOO-BOY,) thought Ranma.

This is going to be a long day...

<snip>

        There were some things that Ranma was not prepared for.

        An apparently insane Doc Tofu shaking him by the shoulders and
screaming "WHERE DID YOU GET THAT AMULET?!?" was one of them.

Your sense of humor did not suffer from the Y2K bug :)

        "G-GEEZE, DOC!  The kid GAVE it to me!"

        Tofu released the somewhat baffled Ranma and sat, shaking.
"But... if you were still cursed, I could possibly see it...
possibly... but if you're not cursed anymore, why would you have it?
It makes no sense..."

Ranma never made any sense...

<snip>

        "Doc, I CAN'T give it to you, even if I wanted to.  And how do
you know what it is?"

        "Hey, Ranma, I've been looking all over for you-- I just
remembered that you're supposed to have an ally, his name's-- Oh,
you've met already."

        Ranma stared at Star, surprised that the rabbit would break his
cover and speak in front of another human.

        Tofu stared at Star, surprised that a rabbit could talk.  Then he
slowly toppled over.

        "This is going to be complicated, isn't it?" sighed the rabbit.

Ranma: You betcha.

<snip>

        Tofu blinked.  She was even using nearly perfect feminine speech
patterns.  "Ah, well... certainly, Naoko.  And... you ARE... Her?"
You could almost hear the capitalization.

        "Oh, yeah.  No doubt about THAT.  And... well, I have to admit,
it's a rush."

Ranma: Oh LOOK AT THAT GUY! WOW!! Those muscles! I MUST HAVE HIM!

<snip>

        "PARAGON NO POWER-- HENSHIN!"

        Lights.  And Tofu almost passed out again.

        "In... incredible..."

        "Yeah, I know... pretty spectacular, isn't it?"

        "Not the light-show, the outfit.  You DO realize that that's
nearly as revealing as anything Masamune Shirow could come up with?"
Tofu's meditation training was allowing him to restrain a nosebleed.
Even knowing the complete truth (As far as anyone did) it was
still... Then a bad thought hit Tofu, and he began to shiver.

Ranma probably didn't even hear of Shirow-san. Things like Appleseed and
Ghost in the Shell and the like are very philosofical. Although Dominion
Tank Police is a rush.

<snip>

        To Be Continued.

I really hope so. Good humour is always welcome. And this (along with
Girl Days) has it in spades. Keep it up.