"Natsuki Shiratori" <natsukichan@Mailops.com> wrote:
this is my very first fanfic... warning: this has lots of Japanese words (although I'm not sure if I'm using them the right way). do you guys want me to post the 'glossary'?
I, for one, would prefer that you just used English words when perfectly
good ones are available.
As for this story... well...
There's nothing new here.
I mean, filling your story with stock "seen it before" scenes is always
a sure-fire way to bore off your readers. Who wants to read scenes that
they've read a hundred times before? But this may be the first story
I've seen that has nothing BUT stock scenes.
This sort of thing is not "original flavor" in any way, shape, or form.
There aren't any manga stories in which the characters just run around
doing business as usual. Every storyline in the manga shows the Ranma
cast reacting to some new circumstance or threat or opportunity.
Suggestion: Decide (if you haven't already) what the main plot/conflict
is in your story -- what makes it unique. Then start the story from THAT
point. If any of the standard scenes fit into your plot, great; if not,
terminate them with extreme prejudice.
Gary Kleppe
http://www.execpc.com/~kleppe/comics.html