was going to leave ADA with just one chapter though an
Expansion Set, and was making notes when the notes just
started flowing together. hence the 2nd chapter below.
all appro disclaimers (#1, #2) are in chapter 1
Chapter Two: "Home Is Where The Heart Is"
---Tendo-ke, Japan, 1992-------
Ranma pulled the cork from the bottle, double checking his
wards. Smoke gradually coalesced into the figure of Nabiki
as Akane and Kasumi watched.
"Oh, how pretty!" Kasumi looked at Nabiki's raiment and
thought about how impractical the garment was.
"Eeeep!" Akane exclaimed and ran up to Nabiki's room to see
if she could find some clothes to give her sister a bit more
coverage.
"Well, the wards held. Any hostile spells were neutralized.
There was some kind of transformation going on, but I can't
see any differences. How do you feel, Nabiki-san?" Ranma
tried NOT to look too closely, though certainly if there had
been any physical changes her "clothing" wouldn't conceal
them.
"A bit chilly, actually." Nabiki had always been a bit of
an exhibitionist but her current lack of clothing was not
quite what she would prefer to wear outside. Though she DID
like the gems. She was hoping that everyone would excuse the
obvious signs of arousal from her as being from the retail
value of her costume, or from the cold. Instead of that it
was taking an iron control to keep from pouncing on Ranma
and doing something terribly ecchi right there before
Kasumi.
Tiny gems twinkled and winked at the thin chainlink belt
around her waist. From the belt hung a thin sheet of nearly
sheer golden silk, which hung from waist to knee level but
was only about six inches wide. More gems glittered at the
earcuffs, the golden manacles and leg cuffs, the collar
around her neck, and the bands of lacy-looking metal
encircling upper arms and lower thighs. Thin chains that
also appeared made of gold linked a ring on her middle
finger to the manacle on each hand. A similar set was on her
feet. Her breasts were barely restrained by a single length
of the thin chain attatched halter-fashion to pair of gemmed
cups.
"This costume appeared on me about three hours ago, while
you were doing up the Circles," Nabiki said, trying to
appear nonchalant and in control.
Akane burst into the room. "Hey, what are all MY clothes
doing in your closet?!"
"Maybe I could turn the clothing back," mused Ranma.
"DON'T YOU DARE!" Nabiki composed herself again. "I mean,
don't bother, Ranma-kun. It's hardly that concerning.
Besides, I'm sure that I can find a use for some of the...
ornamentation."
"Well, if you feel all right, Nabiki-san..." Ranma let his
voice trail off, still trying not to look too close.
"Fine, Ranma-kun, I just need to go change clothes."
"Well, then, I'll clean the circles from the dojo later.
Kasumi, could you come to my room?"
Kasumi's eyes widened. Hers weren't the only ones.
---Beggar's Pass, Shadar, Aramar 7th Age---
They called themselves, when speaking among themselves, the
Dvaerren (or in the regional dialects of two varieties, the
Dvarren.) Everybody else called them dwarves.
There were six varieties of them, and what was true of one
variety was not necessarily true about another. The things
all of them had in common was that they were short by human
standards, tended to be really good artificiers and
engineers, preferred living underground, generally despised
elves, and were sturdy folk. They all also tended to sink
due to a problem with tissue density and insufficient
flotation. Which is why there were no Sea Dwarves. (The Sea
Of Steel being a desert of reddish sand rather than
something with water.)
Some had beards that they would elaborately tie and trim,
like the rugged vaguely Nordic culture dwarves of the
Hegemony. Some shaved all available hair like the dwarves of
the Sea Of Steel. Some dwarves were like those of the
Starfall Mountains, and lived underground but worked above
the surface. Some dwarves were like those of Amberlake and
mastered the powers of mind as they forged Items Of Power.
Some dwarves, like those of Emeraldis, preferred working
with wood and brass to steel and magic.
Thurin Kaille was a dwarf of Shadar, and a Shadarian
Marine, which meant that he trimmed beard and hair, bathed
frequently, and didn't care that much for what others
considered "typical dwarf standards." Currently he was on a
zard, a scaley-feathered herbivorous "reptile" that wasn't
too quick (physically or mentally) but had the benefits of
enormous strength and stamina.
Being a Shadarian Marine, and therefore part of a chain of
command, Thurin was not particularly surprised when the
image of a tall humanoid faded into view. He spent a few
moments getting the zard to behave before addressing the
image.
"Captain? I assume there is a reason you're interrupting my
patrol." Thurin reined the zard in. He didn't like zards, he
didn't like border patrol, he didn't like his Captain, and
he especially didn't like the cloud of gnats attracted to
the damn zard.
"Kaille." The dislike was proven mutual just from the way
the name was said. "Your patrol is to be cut short, and you
are to proceed to Port Shadar at best speed. Your
destination is the Southern Cross base, drydock nine, an
Osprey class ship named Wildhorse. There you will find
further orders."
"Excuse me, 'Wildhorse'?" Thurin glared at the figure.
"This isn't some more crap dealing with that damn useless
mage Ranma, is it? I thought I was finally done with playing
nursemaid."
"I am not at liberty to say," Captain Ashwraith said,
returning the glare.
"Where did these orders originate, then?"
The Captain was clearly reluctant, but dropped a name
before cutting the connection.
Thurin scratched his beard as he considered. "Imperial
Palace, eh? So, it looks like Ranma's in trouble AGAIN." The
dwarf grinned as soon as he was sure that he wasn't being
monitored. "Well, move, you damn beast. The kid's so wet
behind the ears he'd drown if he didn't have ol' Thurin
Kaille to pull him out of his messes."
------Tendo-ke, Japan-------
After all the preparations and excitement of getting Nabiki
out of the bottle, it was almost just another morning at the
Tendo dojo. There *was* a break in the usual routine,
however, as Kasumi was not currently involved in cleaning.
Instead, she was in the guest room.
Akane was doing something unusual too. She had a glass in
one hand and was listening through the wall.
"I'm sorry Ranma, but... can I touch that?"
"Actually, Kasumi, I was hoping you would."
"Oh. I've never handled one of these before. I've seen
pictures, of course. It feels warm..."
Akane made a noise. It was somewhere between "glek" and
"geeble."
"Warm? Ah, you've got the grip perfectly, Kasumi. Keep it
up. Nice even strokes."
"Ah, this is easy. I thought it would be more difficult."
"Well, easy for you. You have such a gentle touch and a
natural talent, I think."
"Hmmm. Why thank you, Ranma!" Kasumi sounded relieved.
"After watching the way you pick at the meals, I was afraid
you were unhappy with me."
"Oh no, not at all. The fault is entirely mine. I'm used to
a *very* different diet. I thought you could use some
reassurance, though, which is why I'm sharing this with
you."
Akane twitched, what was obviously occurring in the next
room sufficient horror that she couldn't seem to move.
"Hmmm. This juice here... OH! It's good!"
"It gratifies me to hear you say that, Kasumi." Ranma
chuckled at something. "Try gently squeezing here as you
suck on it."
"MMMMMmmmmm. Oh MY."
Akane slammed the door to Ranma's room open. "CUT IT OUT!
KASUMI, I'll... save you..."
Kasumi and Ranma looked up from the table had been set up
in his bedroom, thin slices of some unidentifiable fruit and
chunks of dark black bread visible. The oddly shaped knife
and cutting board in front of Kasumi, as well as the sliced
melon, seemed to indicate what the 'nice even strokes' had
been.
"Akane?" Kasumi seemed puzzled by her sister's outburst.
Akane thought quickly, trying to find a way to make her
sudden entry sound logical.
"Oh, Akane, why don't you try some of this," Kasumi
exclaimed, holding a purple fruit about the size of a fist
out. "It's really quite good."
"Errr. No, I think I'll stick with the traditional
breakfast. Really." Akane smiled while she mentally kicked
herself. Even if this Ranma were using a spell to control
Kasumi, her sweetly oblivious sister wouldn't do anything
like *that*.
Ranma actually chuckled. "I understand and empathize,
Tendo-san."
Akane blinked. (He knows that I thought he was using a
spell to rape Kasumi?!)
"Yeah," Ranma said. "I'm having a lot of trouble adapting
to a Japanese diet, particularly in the morning. There's
just something about not wanting to get too inventive first
thing in the morning, ne?"
(Whew!) Akane relaxed marginally. "Yeah, I guess."
Nabiki stuck her head in, saw the fruit, and didn't wait
for an invitation. After the first bite, her eyes popped
open and she began inhaling slices of bread and pieces of
the other fruits.
Kasumi and Ranma were amused. Akane was alarmed but hid it.
Nabiki used the distractions to palm seeds of the exotic
otherworldly plants.
"Anyway," Ranma said after a few moments, "Kasumi, would
you like to go for a ride later? I was curious about the
area."
Kasumi brightened slightly but pointed out that they did
not have a car.
"No problem." Ranma snapped his fingers, causing the bag to
waddle over and open. He reached into Bag, drawing forth a
rolled up carpet that he snapped out as if it were a sheet.
That the carpet flattened out and hung in midair was duly
noted by all concerned. Their reactions, however, were not
quite identical.
Kasumi's eyes widened and got a focussed look to them that
her sisters would not have recognized had they been paying
attention. An image of herself, flying along on a carpet,
danced before her eyes. She could look down at the house and
watch her responsibilities and duties dwindle off into the
distance as she soared amongst the heavens...
Nabiki saw the potential for profit among other things. A
trip to anywhere she wanted that didn't cost her anything.
Up to the Gero Spa or down to Kansai for a quick trip. No
crowded commuter trains, to ride with style wherever she
wanted to go...
Akane thought about how Ranma might go zipping off forever
with her naive sister on one of those things. On the other
hand, it'd be nice to go somewhere without getting groped by
some pervert on the train... Maybe she ought to demand a
flight first, just to make sure it was safe.
"So, since this is Sunday, y'know," Ranma began, cursing
himself for being flustered. There was no way, even if this
girl actually turned out to like him, that she'd want to go
back home with him. And what was this bit with taking over a
dojo that Tendo-san kept harping about during dinner? He was
a mage, getting up there among the higher ranks, though he
couldn't quite pull off a MIRV or Dragon Storm. What kind
of... well, she *might* make a good Healer cleric. Hmmm.
Soun opened his mouth, ready to charge into the room from
where he was eavesdropping and make sure they knew that this
was an ideal opportunity to unite the two Houses.
"I will need this room clear, though. Those casks of water
are cursed and part of my research. I'll transport them
myself upstairs." Ranma gestured towards the small barrels.
"Oh dear, I forgot breakfast for father!" Kasumi said this
in the sort of voice one would expect for someone saying
that they'd forgotten to set the parking brake and that
massive collision was THEIR fault.
"I'll handle it, Kasumi!" Akane winked and made a show of
rolling up her sleeves.
Soun fled, thoughts of joining the two houses momentarily
tabled.
Kasumi waited until Akane had left the room. "Uhm,
Ranma-kun. You..." This had been bothering her for some
time, and she was finally just going to come out and ask.
"Yes, Kasumi-chan?"
Kasumi took a deep breath. "It's just that I..."
"FOUL SORCERER! WHERE ARE YOU?"
Nabiki, listening from nearby, winced. Akane dropped the
bottle of vegetable oil and flung her apron aside. Soun
growled. Kasumi politely excused herself as she made a
comment about how they apparently had a guest.
"What's Kuno doing here?" Ranma sighed and shook his head.
"This is my day off, fer cryin' out loud." Maybe he ought to
use something simple. Mostly Harmless might work.
Soun frowned further. Here the schools were about to be
joined and some MORON had to go butting in!
Akane went out the front door, intent on beating some sense
into Kuno. How dare he attack her home!
Kasumi noticed the smoke and flames from the kitchen first,
rescuing the doll just before it caught.
"Quench," cast Ranma a moment later.
"So where's Kuno, anyway?" Akane walked back in. "Hey, what
happened here?"
<CRASH!><SPLASH!>
"Offhand," said Ranma looking up, "I'd say Kuno's in my
room."
An inhuman cry echoed through the house. "Squuuueeeeee!"
"And I'd say he found the cursed water," appended Ranma.
"I'll get him," Akane declared, running up the stairs.
"She isn't..." Ranma said, unable to believe she was doing
that. "Just great, I'll have to shift my Repel Water to
HER!" <dimension door>
"I wonder why..." Kasumi wondered about that. Ranma had
mentioned several times that he had a curse, but always
changed the subject when questioned about specifics. What
kind of curse could he have?
----------------------
"Squeeee Squeeee!"
Akane looked in the room but didn't see any sign of Kuno.
"Here, Tendo-san!" Ranma appeared in midair and caused a
globe of light to form around the youngest Tendo. "That'll
keep you from getting cursed."
"Yeah right," Akane said, looking for her usual target.
There was his blue kendo outfit. There was his bokken. There
was a smashed open wall and a shattered keg of water. Akane
stiffened as the implication hit her. Tatewaki Kuno,
greatest pervert of the school, was in HER home - WITHOUT
his clothes! "That, that, that PERVERT!"
"Hmmm?" Ranma asked, not seeing the connection. Stupid he
was willing to admit, pathetic to be certain,
egomaniacal -definitely, needlessly violent - relatively.
Pervert?
The doorbell rang, giving Ranma something ELSE to think
about.
----------------------
Shampoo was bored. Bored, bored, bored. Life as a plush
doll was *not* something she particularly fancied. She could
see, she could hear, she could feel. Moving or even blinking
didn't seem to be options. Sleeping she could do. Oddly
enough she felt calmer and more at peace than she had in her
memory.
Shampoo was assuming that this was because she apparently
didn't have blood or hormones going through her system, a
side effect of being a warm and fuzzy sort of toy. The
initial panic had worn away and was now down to a sort of
amused largely-detached observation.
So Shampoo had spent considerable time doing something
she'd never had time to do before. She was getting rather
introspective. Previously, time training had consumed her
life. One of the things she'd hoped would be different when
tracking down this mage was that the world wouldn't rely on
her to be Shampoo anymore. Her great grandmother could find
someone else to train, the other village girls could stop
with all the comments and gossip, Mousse could find someone
else to annoy, and Shampoo could find an Outsider male!
She'd known since she was fourteen that this was the way to
go. Not merely annoying to the point of near-homicidal
tendencies like Mousse. Nor like Razor, who was a very nice
weaponsmith with some healing training, but in a marriage
he'd be the properly deferential Amazon male. NOT what
Shampoo fancied in a lifemate.
So an Outsider had defeated her, he was male, he was
valuable to the tribe by her own great grandmother's
admission, and...
And apparently he'd set a trap up so that as she snuck into
his camp, it went off and Shampoo the Amazon Champion was
now the 7"tall plush doll. Her dignity was the first
casualty, quite obviously.
Then there was this girl. Not a proper Amazon at all. Nice,
though. Pleasant. The girl chatted to the doll about a great
many things while she was cooking. Shampoo had puzzled it
all out gradually, but her command of the Japanese language
was a few odd words she'd picked up listening to Sash talk
about that anime stuff. Still, it made this less intolerable
than it would have been.
And then some different girl had come in, started cooking,
and left. Shampoo had watched with horror as the oil caught
fire. As the flames spread closer, Shampoo would have been
screaming if she could. She could feel the heat, and knew
that she was a few seconds from burning to death.
Then the first girl came in and set everything aright. The
mage stuck his head in, casting a spell that caused the
flames to die, but it was the first girl who had SAVED her!
Not saving the village elder's great granddaughter, not some
odd fantasy of Mousse's creation, and certainly not the
Village Champion weighed down by responsibilities and
constantly having to meet OTHER people's expectations.
Shampoo's eyes got misty as the First Girl took her to the
door. She wasn't being left alone again. She was being
clutched to the girl's chest and just felt so... warm and
fuzzy.
Now if SOMEONE would just turn her back to normal.
-----EYECATCH----------
Ranma is in tuxedo with top hat. He sets the hat on a small
table.
"Hey, Kasumi, watch me pull a rabbit out of my hat!"
"But, Ranma, the last time you tried that..." Kasumi is in
an evening dress and looks concerned.
"Nothing up my sleeve. PRESTO!"
Akane, dressed in a bunny suit, has just been pulled out of
the hat and is hanging by her ears from Ranma's hand.
"You're a dead man, Saotome."
"Uhm, we'll be right back after these messages." <dimension
door>
---Shadar, Aramar 7th Age Of Man----
Thurin left the hated beast behind at the first chance,
then made his way through the Amazon Base.
He grumbled, he glared, and he generally acted royally
pissed. It kept most of them away. He was a Marine and
therefore had served on the old-fashioned spelljammers,
skyjammers, etherjammers, and other craft. This meant that
he was well acquainted with the race known as the Delphins
Amazons.
He was a dwarf, he was a warrior, he was a damn MARINE! He
was NOT cute!
(That had been one good thing about having the Kid around.
All the girls went after HIM and left ME alone.) Thurin
almost smiled. (Let's see Southern Cross Amazons tend to
follow the pie-slice design on their bases, so the drydocks
should be there. Yup. Now let's see... Dock Nine...)
Thurin grimaced at the sight of the ship. Osprey class
skyjammer, as promised. (There's an old saying among the
shipwrights. Manueverability, Versatility, Firepower,
Livability. Choose any two. Hmmph.)
The dwarf looked at the ship, looking vaguely like a
stylized hawk, and wondered how many battles this ship had
been through. "What a piece of junk!"
"HEY!" A silver skinned woman looked down from one wing.
"The Wildhorse has been through a few fights, but she'll
still d-hop capable and will do 75 kph in normal skyjamming
operations."
"Pfeh. An oriad? Besides, I've worked on Osprey class ships
before. The Stargazer, for one. One light ballista,
manueverability sucks, and it wallows in the water."
The oriad frowned. "Mage cannon, missile type. You're still
as grumpy as ever, are you, Thurin Kaille?"
"Do I know you?" The dwarf regarded the oriad. Problem was,
all nymphs tended to look alike. Oriads all looked either
like they were sculpted from stone or liquid silver. Well,
at least if they had a mage cannon they weren't *completely*
defenseless.
"Silvara, Engineer of the Wildhorse," the oriad proclaimed.
"Rank designate is sergeant, Captain."
"I ain't no officer, I work for a living," the dwarven
marine grumbled. "I'm also no mage so I can't operate the
cannon."
"You're the captain now," Silvara informed him. "Orders are
in your desk. We're going to go rescue some friend of yours
by order of the Empress."
That *did* surprise Thurin. "The Empress? Me, a Captain?
I'm a warrior, not an administrator."
A familiar voice broke into the conversation. "True, and I
thought that *I* would have been a much better choice, but
some people thought otherwise."
"Stormshadow?!" Thurin couldn't help but look around,
though he knew the elf would only show up when *he* wanted
to been seen. "Turn over a ship command to a rogue like you?
HAH! If you were the only other choice, no wonder they'd
make me Captain."
Shadows seemed to solidify as the elf stepped forward.
"Still stubborn as a rock and twice as harsh? I guess some
things don't improve with age. Still, you've hit on it. My
'talents' are more often employed in the field of special
operations."
Thurin considered the lanky form of the elf. He knew the
mage was overall a good person, if overly concerned with
uncovering the secrets of ancient magic. "So what are *you*
doing here? Are we expected to steal something?"
Stormshadow lost his customary smirk. "You'll see. We've
still got to wait for two more crewmen, so you'd better take
the time to read those orders."
-----Jusenkyo, China-------
"Ah sir," the Jusenkyo Guide said, guessing. He *thought*
this was a sir, but wasn't entirely sure. "You not want to
go there. Is over one hundred spring here, each with own
terrible tragic stor...urk!"
The Jusenkyo Guide clawed at the invisible fingers around
his neck as he was lifted into the air.
"Silence wretch. I want to know where Ranma Emeraldrank is.
Have you seen him?"
"Urk!"
"Never mind," the foppish looking figure drew a glowing
pattern in midair. "Ho ho. So he WAS here. And was
transformed into a girl by the magic of these pools? Let's
see what happens if I toss YOU in one!" <SPLASH>
The Guide crawled out of the pool. "Sir cannot curse me. I
already cursed by springs to act as Jusenkyo Guide and
Caretaker of this place."
"Whatever, you are of no use to me." The hunter adjusted
his lace collar briefly. "Hmmm. So he went from here to that
village of obnoxious women, then from there on. But to
where?"
"I not know."
"Of course you don't, vermin," the hunter said disdainfully
and cast a spell at the Guide. "Now, that should hold you
while I siphon off the magic of this site, then use the
power to get a lock on that boy's position."
"Kaw! Kaw!" The raven flew away before this crazy tourist
did anything else.
----Tendo-ke, Japan------
"Yes, can I help you?" Kasumi answered the door to find a
woman she didn't recognize standing there. She was a little
distracted though, as she had just noticed that the plush
doll she was carrying was CRYING?!
"Hello there," the woman said with a bow. "I received a
call from Soun Tendo stating my son was here. I'm Nodoka
Saotome."
"Oh," said Kasumi. "How nice. Won't you come in? My name is
Kasumi Tendo, and I'm Ranma's fiancee." (Oh dear, did I say
that?)
"Geez, Akane, all I did was..." Ranma came down the stairs
and stared at the doll in Kasumi's hands. "Oh heck. I forgot
entirely about her."
"Oh, Ranma, this is Nodoka Saotome."
"Oh hello." Ranma scratched his head. "Uhm, Kasumi, about
that doll you've got there..."
"You're Ranma? You're too old to be my son, he'd be only
sixteen."
"Son?!" Ranma blinked, this being enough to derail his
concentration rather adequately. "Uhm, actually, I think if
you go objectively chronologically in THIS universe I *am*
sixteen. It's just a few more years have passed for me
subjectively. You're my... mom?!"
"Who is your father?"
"Genma Saotome. Errrr. This isn't about a food bill is it?"
Nodoka blinked this time. "Why?"
Ranma sighed. "Well, it's like this. I used a seekerspell
to track his progress, tricky when the trail's that old so I
used a spirit-magic invocation. The spirits don't forget
that easily." Ranma grimaced. "Apparently neither do
storekeepers, gamblers, or a few dojo owners. Every town I
went into for provisions seemed to have someone ELSE trying
to get me for repaying HIS debts. I went through half my
gold stash just paying them off."
Nodoka blinked again. "That DOES sound like Genma. Oh,
Ranma, you're back!" <glomp!>
"Uhm, let me change the doll back to human before we get
too involved in this," Ranma requested.
-----------------
Akane entered her room, glad that she'd convinced Ranma to
drop the spell he'd cast on her earlier. It had felt
uncomfortable, like an extra layer of skin that didn't quite
fit. Something registered and she went into a defensive
posture immediately.
"Bweeeee!" (Akane Tendo, you have come to rescue me!)
A small black pig launched itself at her, dripping water.
Naturally, being a trained martial artist, Akane blocked the
attack.
"Bweeee! Bweee! Bweee!" (Ah, Akane, my love! Throw off the
chains of the spell that bind you to that foul sorcerer!)
"Ohhhh!" Akane got a good look at her attacker. "A piglet?
You look cold. C'mere. Don't be afraid."
The piglet slowly eased forward, looking very uncertain.
"Bweee? Bquiii squee squee snort skiii kwee." (This room?
Ah, so I have found the bedchambers of Akane Tendo!)
"You're all wet, poor thing." Akane held the little black
pig to her bosom, feeling his heart beat rapidly against
her. "Well, I guess I just need to warm you up. How's a hot
bath sound?"
"BWEeEE!" (That sounds most wonderful!)
--------------------
Nodoka watched as her son put the doll on a cushion, stood
well back, and put a hand up.
"Uhm, you two might want to get clear. Last I saw, this
girl was attacking me. If she doesn't go away quietly, I'll
have to use another spell, and right now my manna ain't that
high." Ranma looked over his shoulder at where his newly
acquired mother and Kasumi stood. They were joined a moment
later by Nabiki, dressed now in a pullover.
"Bag," said Ranma after a moment's consideration.
Kasumi and Nabiki got out of the carpetbag's way as it
waddled in. Nodoka merely stared, her normally immaculate
hair toinging out slightly.
Apparently rummaging in the interior, Ranma explained. "I
had just returned to this dimension when I ran into this
village of Amazons. Bag here started eating the first prize,
and I got challenged to a fight by one of the Amazons
present. When I defeated her, a whole bunch of other Amazons
tried to attack me. I escaped, but naturally I put up a set
of anti-sneak wards when I made camp for the night.
"This girl is the one who challenged me, and tried to sneak
into my camp. Hence her current status as a plush toy."
Ranma found what he was looking for and pulled an orb out of
his pack. "Since it might take me a few moments to get off a
binding spell if she's violent, I'll have to awaken one of
my travelling companions.
"Kyor," Ranma said to the orb after placing it on the
floor.
The orb shimmered and expanded, finally bursting and
revealing a non-orb shape.
"Oh, how," Kasumi was going to say cute but that would be a
blatant lie, "distinguished."
"That is one UGLY dog." Nabiki was not mincing words. Then
she frowned as some details of the anatomy registered. "What
the...?!"
The dog looked over each of them, golden eyes regarding
Nabiki and Nodoka's wrapped bundle briefly before deciding
that nobody in the room was an immediate candidate for
lunchmeat.
"You have a dog, son?"
"Aramar in the Seventh Age Of Man can be a dangerous
place," explained Ranma. "You're looking at one of the few
things that can eat a troll without being either poisoned or
killed by the regenerating properties. Kyor is an askanar.
Say hello, Kyor."
*"Hello Kyor."*
"Very funny."
*"Kyor think so."* The dog's golden eyes searched the room
again. *"No threat."*
"A telepathic dog, or no, that isn't quite a dog is it?"
Nabiki's eyes narrowed. The eyes looked more feline, and the
creature had a mix of feline and canine features in the body
structure as well. It was also huge and thickly built,
Nabiki was guessing about one hundred eighty pounds or so.
*"Kyor not like cities. Smelly. No room to run. Not fun. We
go back now?"*
"Actually, Kyor, I need you to guard. I'm going to
transform this doll back."
Kyor sniffed the doll, then trotted back. *"Put back in bag
when done. Not like it here."*
Ranma cast the dispel. The doll shimmered and changed.
"AIREN!" The Amazon Glomp was stopped in midpounce by a dog
knocking her out of the air and locking jaws around her
neck.
Everyone else, except Ranma, blinked. They hadn't seen the
dog move from a seated position near Ranma's feet, and then
it just suddenly was there with the girl in a compromising
grip.
*"She not intend harm. She try grab. Kyor stop. Kyor
kill?"*
"No, Kyor, just keep her away for now."
The dog backed off slightly, resuming his position near
Ranma.
"Did he just teleport?!" Nabiki grabbed the first
explanation that made sense.
Shampoo rubbed her neck to check for blood. "No, Shampoo
see. Dog move very fast."
"Askari Hounds can move *very* quickly when they want to,"
agreed Ranma. "Now, will you grant me a promise that you
won't hurt anyone here? Otherwise I'll just turn you into a
statue until I get a long distance teleport ready."
Shampoo winced at having her options cut down like that,
but when dealing with a wizard. She was about ready to flee
back to China anyway. "Shampoo promise."
"So, why did you pursue me Shampoo? I left your village and
had no intention of coming back. I never intended harm to
you or your village."
Shampoo considered *very* carefully. Spending an unknown
amount of time as a doll had taught her something that her
great-grandmother had despaired of teaching Shampoo:
caution.
"Shampoo no speak Japanese goodly. Is OK say Chinese?"
"Not speak goodly is an understatement," said Nabiki in a
tone that indicated amusement.
"Well, I'm running low on manna, but I suppose," Ranma said
reluctantly. It wasn't that he disliked Amazons, far from
it. He had some very good friends in House Rising Sun of the
Delphins Amazons. (They'd wanted to be much better friends,
that touch of alienness about them had always put him off.)
Shampoo waited until the glow of the spell appeared.
"<Okay. Here's the deal. In my tribe tradition and personal
honor count for a lot. When an Outsider male defeats an
Amazon, they must give the Kiss Of Life and marry the man in
question.>"
Ranma nodded. "Oh, I see."
Nabiki and Kasumi blinked. "WHAT?!"
Nodoka smiled and turned to Kasumi. "Best get the tea
things out, dear, this sounds like it will take awhile."
--------------------
"AAAAAAAAAA!"
"Ah, Akane Tendo, my love!"
"Where did you...? And where's P-chan?!"
Kuno smirked as he stepped from the bath. "Ah, Akane, this
must be fate itself that you should appear before me as
magnificently..."
Akane panicked. Kuno appearing out of nowhere, obviously
being HENTAI and then some. In fact, she KNEW he was glad to
see her. It was rather obvious. "AAAAAAAA!" Akane repeated
for good measure.
----------------------
"aaaaaAAAAAAAAAA!!" <ZOOM!> <ZOOM!>
The small crowd around the table did an eerie synchronous
blink.
"Uhm, the stress must be getting to me," Nabiki confessed.
"I could have sworn I saw something that was flagrantly
impossible."
"Oh dear, Akane really should wait until after she's
married before doing such things!" Kasumi made a mental note
to talk to Akane about this, and likely to schedule the
wedding SOON.
Ranma finally blinked. "Uhm, Nabiki, if it was your
youngest sister, nude, being pursued by an equally nude
Tatewaki Kuno across the dining room and out into your
backyard... that wasn't an optical illusion."
Nabiki blinked again. "MY CAMERA!" <Zoom!>
Nodoka waited calmly for Kasumi to fill her teacup. "My
goodness, is it always like this here?"
"aaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaa!"
"Akane Tendo, my love, come to me! Your invitation to bathe
with you is quite accepted!"
"<I never knew that the Japanese had such... bizarre
courtship rites.>"
*"Kyor think girl just genuinely repulsed."*
"So, Shampoo," Nodoka began, ignoring the still audible
wail of the running couple. "Can you explain what's going
on?"
"<With regard to myself, yes. I have NO idea what's going
on with those two. And who's that older man who just got
trampled?>"
"Oh, father father father."
"So, Shampoo, why don't you explain why you've got to marry
my son?" Nodoka ignored the chaos as best she could and just
concentrated on the first problem at hand.
---------------------
Nabiki went to Ranma's room, stepped over the puddle, and
took a position atop one of the casks. These pictures would
be worth a FORTUNE!
Nabiki eagerly snapped a set of photos. Some shots of
Akane. Some shots of Kuno. Some shots of Kuno and Akane!
Yes, this would sell for big yen. Not that she needed the
money, but it could go into her college fund.
<SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! CREAK! CRACK! SPLASH!>
"Aaaaa! Meow! Meow! Meow!" <CRACK! SPLASH!> "whoooo!
whooo!"
-------------------------
"I see," said Ranma, sipping his tea.
"<So you'll marry me?>"
"There's several problems with your proposal," noted Ranma.
"One, I will not stay in this world but will return to my
own as soon as I've cured this curse, determined what needs
to be done to clear my karma, and gotten THAT taken care
of."
"WHAT?!" Nodoka's aura of calm evaporated.
"I'm sorry, Mother," Ranma said with a sad smile, "but
Shadar is my home. I've friends and an adopted family,
responsibilities and duties. I'm a mage, but I also work for
the Imperial Palace itself."
"And what of your honor to your family? What of your honor
to your country? What of your duties as our firstborn?"
Ranma merely cocked an eyebrow at this. "Up until a few
minutes ago, the only family I knew of was my father. Unless
you count my adopted mother Lijra Diamondrank. As to my
country, Shadar *is* my country now. And to its defense and
well-being I am sworn."
Kasumi gathered her courage to do something that no one who
knew her would expect. At least no one who saw her as a meek
little hausfrau. "Ranma? When you leave, would you..."
Nodoka and Ranma watched Kasumi briefly stammer and shake.
"...would you take me with you..."
"<WHAT?! Don't tell me that YOU are my rival here?>"
Shampoo was upset.
Ranma blinked. "What do you mean rival?"
"Son, we *really* need to discuss this."
"<You can't be my rival. You're not even a warrior!>"
*"Loud. Wanna go home."*
"aaaaaAAAAAAAaaaaaa!"
"Akane! My <huff> fragile and <puff> delicate <gasp>
flower!"
"WAAAAAAA! Now my youngest daughter is getting married! Oh
happy day!" (And maybe this will give Kasumi and Ranma some
ideas!)
"whooo who whooooo!"
Ranma considered briefly the joy of a Silence 15' Radius
cast upon himself.
-----------------------------------------
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