Hi all...
A while back I wrote a story called _Ascent of the Fallen_ and asked
people to comment on it. To my delight, nobody thought it sucked, or
at least if they did they decided not to tell me. You can read the
original at http://sage_ohlmin.tripod.com/evafic.htm if you want.
Anyway, after looking through the comments I got, I decided to do a
rewrite. This will be the only one--I will do no more. So if you have
something about the story you think I should change, now's the time to
let me know. At any rate, I've gotten a good bit of the way through
the rewrite, and I thought I would maliciously post a teaser for the
new version to the FFML, simply because I'm a rat bastard.
So here's the prologue. I'd like to send a special thanks to Disaster
for pre-reading these, and also I'd like to thank everyone who
commented on the original. If you think you want to pre-read other new
parts (you poor soul) then let me know.
I'll shut up now, after noting that Neon Genesis Evangelion, and all
characters, objects, and events pertaining thereto, are the
intellectual property of Gainax Films Incorporated and are used here
without license or approval. This story is copyright Sparky Clarkson.
The author grants unlimited license for readers to archive and this
story provided (1) that the text of the story is not altered in any
way and (2) no money is charged for the privilege of viewing. All
profit derived from the storage or display of this story must be
remitted in full to Gainax Films Inc. as a licensing fee. Have a nice
day :) .
NEON GENESIS EVANGELION:
ASCENT OF THE FALLEN
By Sparky Clarkson
Prologue:
"I will put a new spirit within you; and I will take the stony heart
out..."
(Ezekiel 11:19)
*******
The white marble disk that formed the floor of the room felt warm to
the nude boy kneeling at its center. His pale skin, a match for the
color of the stone beneath him, did not recoil from the living rock as
it might have from the cold blaze of steel. The boy had bowed his
head, his unruly grey hair hiding his red eyes from view. Nonetheless,
he sensed every aspect of the room around him.
Evenly spaced around the perimeter of the white disk, hovering between
the stone circle and the glowing grey mist that lay beyond it, floated
10 monoliths. Most of them also glowed, each suffused with an inner
illumination. All of the simple rectangular prisms were formed of
different materials, yet each something in common with its
neighbors--an underlying similarity, beyond a likeness of shape, that
unified the disparate emanations.
Ahead of him and to his right was a glass monolith, all but invisible
compared to the others. It alone did not glow, yet it drew the boy's
attention more than any of the others. To the right of it floated a
series of seven smaller, glowing monoliths, each formed of a different
material: gold, moonstone, silver, onyx, ruby, aquamarine, and
emerald. Each was twice as tall as the boy, and three times as broad.
After that was a slightly larger monolith of diamond, glowing somewhat
more brightly than the seven.
Directly in front of the boy floated the largest monolith, constructed
of sapphire. However, neither the boy nor anyone else in the room
could bear to look directly at it. No brighter than any of the others,
it was nonetheless greater, as if the radiance pouring from it
encompassed the entire spectrum--incomprehensible in its vastness. All
the other lights in the circle were but single tones to the symphony
of its light. No being could come to grips with such illumination, and
so all bowed their heads in deference to the inconceivable.
A voice emanated from the sapphire, saying, "You know that this choice
will change everything, do you not?" This indeed was a symphony: the
mellifluous tones seemed to be created by every single particle of
air, as if the universe itself spoke for the light in the sapphire.
The memory of the sound lingered long after it was gone, like the last
note of a sweetly tolling bell, inspiring an almost painful longing to
hear it again.
The boy bowed his head lower. "I know, Father. But truly, I have no
choice--no power over my heart," he said.
There was a rustling sound from the seven smallest monoliths in the
circle, but this stilled quickly when the voice again emanated from
the sapphire. "Do you then leave me, Tabris, as so many have before?
Have you chosen another to worship?" it asked.
Tabris shook his head. "Lâ ilâha ill Allâh," he replied, "I have not
chosen to worship another. I have decided to surrender my eternal life
for the one I love." A tear formed in his right eye.
Now a voice emanated from the diamond monolith. "I have seen his
heart," it said, its tones similar to those from the light in the
sapphire, but somehow more strident. "True love has guided his hand,
not base lust."
The supreme light did not reply that it knew this already--doing so
would only repeat the obvious. "Then, Tabris, I have reason to make
judgement," it announced.
Tabris bowed his head lower again. "I cast myself upon your mercy," he
replied.
"As you have asked, so shall it be done. My plan continues. The day of
glory approaches. Let all know the consequences," the voice from the
sapphire monolith announced. "Go in my love, Tabris," it added warmly.
"Thank you, Lord," the boy replied.
A chorus from the seven seats quickly drowned him out. "So let it be
written, so let it be done. Amen," chanted the choir of lights.
Beneath his breath, Tabris whispered, "It is my choice..."
And then he was gone.
*******
Hope you like it...
Sparky
*********
"Violence is the last refuge of the incompetent."--Isaac Asimov
Access Sparky's fanfiction, links galore, and all kinds of heresy
at Heaven's Gate!
http://sage_ohlmin.tripod.com/evafic.htm
______________________________________________
FREE Personalized Email at Mail.com
Sign up at http://www.mail.com?sr=mc.mk.mcm.tag001