Tell Chris he did a good job, I like the way the story is starting
to develop my only complaint is that there seems to be some typos with the
work especially when you try to give the characters speech a pause using
three periods like so "..." it sometimes appears as if it's only one
period which tends to confuse readers. I personally think that this is due
to a computer error. Other than that the only thing I have to say is a bit
of advice carefully develop the story especially the villians, because
without a villian or some interesting situation to provoke the main
character to action a story simply becomes a boring and long rant.