<Poor *RANMA*?!?> he thought.
<Esa:s eyes go *piku piku*>
"I've been so cruel to him! I've accused him - I've beaten
him - he must hate me!!" she cried, pouring her heart out to
P-Chan. "And all this time - I never - never knew - <sob!!>"
Ryoga was, by this point, thoroughly confused.
"If I had known, I'd never - never have been so mean to him!
I'd never have hit him - never have called him a pervert -
never have accused him of flirting with all those girls! I'M
A HATEFUL, CRUEL, NASTY BITCH AND I'M NOT GOOD ENOUGH FOR
HIM!!! WAAAAAHHHHHH!!!"
<Esa face-faults. *CRASH* *OW* >
"LEAVE HIM ALONE, YOU BULLY!!" Nabiki cried. "STOP PICKING
ON POOR RANMA!!"
<WHAM!!> went Nabiki's mallet over Soun's head.
Funny, I didn't know you could face-fault while lying down, well,
must always be open to new experiences..
"I should have known, shouldn't I, P-Chan?" she said to her
pet piglet. "All the signs were there. I should have seen
it, it was so ... obvious! And it explains everything! Why
he acts like he acts, the way he treats me ... I'm never
going to forgive myself." She took a deep breath. "What do I
do now?"
Should have known?
Gee, what could have made Ranma into such a person who hardly ever gets
angry
and always forgives people within a day ^^
Still, this is Akane speaking, so he's prolly referring to the way Ranma
talks, and
why he acts so macho all the time..
<Who cares? Dump him!> "Bwee!!"
... Pre-manga ending, obviously. Pre-Akari?
herself at him! He had to save her!
First, he had to find the door.
Ah, now that's the hard part, Isn't it?
<Damn,> she said to herself, <I didn't think I'd take it so
hard. I mean, I've discovered horrible things about people
before, but *this* ... poor Ranma ...>
What? to make Nabiki act like this, it has to be something
pretty horrible... or stupid. Or both.^^
"Um, did you two eat some of Shampoo's drugged food or
something?" he asked in his most subtle fashion. (Subtle as
fishing with dynamite.)
Better that way, if Ranma'd tried to be REALLY subtle,
he'd probably said something that would've sounded like
a marriage proposal..
"Tee hee. You're so funny, Ranma-kun," Akane giggled. "Why
can't I just want to do something nice for my fiancee and
best friend?" she asked, snuggling close to him.
*TA-TAAM*
Ranma's eyes bugged out and his pig-tail stood straight up.
Ranma knows the signs of Apocalypse, when he sees them
<WHAM!!> <WHAM!!>
Does this qualify as a double-whammy?
Akane and Nabiki's dual mallet attack drove Soun into the
floor down to his neck.
"Damn it, Daddy!" Nabiki yelled, "Can't you stop harassing
Ranma?"
Ookay.. Nabiki's acting like Akane..
Maybe they're related, or something..^^
"I'll marry Ranma when *he* asks me, not before!" Akane
agreed. "Now stop bullying my Ranma!"
"WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?!?" Ranma demanded.
...
Sorry, I can't see Ranma doing this.. Then again, the weird-o-meter
hit "SD-AMG meets Child's toy meets Photon" a while ago..
and kept rising..
Personally I think Ranma'd freak out some other way.
Akane looked horrified. "Oh no! I did something wrong! I'm
sorry, Ranma! Please forgive me!" she cried, glomping onto
him and sobbing.
<face-fault>
"OH GOD HE HATES ME!!" Akane yowled, her eyes fountaining
tears. "I'M SORRY!! I DON'T DESERVE TO LIVE!!"
"WAAAAAHHHHHH!!!" Nabiki cried. "HE HATES ME TOO!! I NEVER
SHOULD HAVE TREATED HIM LIKE I DID!! I'M A BAD PERSON!!"
"SO AM I!!" Akane agreed. "WAAAAAHHHHHH!!!"
<LOL>
"Itaii.."
"But I don't want to eat brussel sprouts, mommy," Ryoga
mumbled.
Oh, the horror..
Basically..
I'm of two minds of whether you should write more.
On the positive, this is the funniest thing I've read since "Nuke 'em till
they glow".
Not to mention, I'm dying to find out what this horrible secret is..
And even more I want to know, what will happen next, with Akane and Nabiki
acting like this.. And how'll Cologne react if she finds out about the
'secret'.
On the negative, I'm laughing so loud it hurts. Bad. I'm not sure if I'll
survive future installments..
Bah, life's a risk!
Keep 'em coming!